“What’d I do?” I asked because I literally didn’t know.
“You really don’t know?” To that I remained silent again. “You made it pretty clear you have no interest in being her boyfriend. At any point. Which is weird since I get the feeling that the opposite is true.”
“How did I do that exactly?”
“You didn’t tell her it was ok to call you her boyfriend. Seriously. Guys are assholes. You know this. They treat girls like shit and wonder when those same girls have to lie and say they have a boyfriend when they don’t. Because somehow it’s safer for a girl to belong to another guy and therefore be unavailable than to just turn down some dick they aren’t interested in. It’s bullshit. Saying she has a boyfriend was her way of protecting herself. She doesn’t know him. He could be crazy.”
I blinked about fifty times in the span of thirty seconds. How the hell did Cain know all of that? Yeah, Flannery got a lot of shit once people on campus found out she was selling her virginity to stay in college. One guy tried to take it for free. Because once she wasn’t Cain’s girlfriend anymore it was like open season. Cain had been nearby and put an end to it then. Sort of made it known that if anyone fucked with her they’d answer to him, to me, to Adam. It didn’t put an end to the harassment but at least it stayed verbal after that.
“Damn. I didn’t think Oprah was still on anymore. Or were you watching Dr. Phil?” Because really, I had no other response to him.
“Fuck you. I spend an inordinate amount of time with Flannery and Kendra, and I have ears. That shit doesn’t leave. Do you at least get what I’m saying?”
I sighed. “Yeah. I do.”
“So you really like this one, huh?”
Well, I didn’t want to answer the question. Then again it was Cain. He wouldn’t blab my business. He never had before.
“I think I do,” I finally admitted.
“That’s pretty huge for you.”
“I know. Look, I’m going to come for a visit soon so we can discuss this more then. While braiding our hair and getting bikini waxes. Fair enough?”
He chuckled quietly. “I might hold you to the bikini waxes.”
And that’s why Cain was my brother.
The rest of the week with Miriam gone was the longest I’d had in a while. Sure I worked. A lot. Made sense since I didn’t have anything else to do. I’d been invited to a couple of parties, a baseball game, stuff like that, but nothing peaked my interest. I spent my nights texting Miriam, talking when she had the time. Apparently, she’d scheduled a few things while she was out east to keep her busy. She said she hated being alone in the hotel all the time and these things were arranged before she met me so I didn’t bother thinking she was avoiding me because of my weird reaction that first day.
Worst of all, she called to say she had to stay an extra day. One of the shoots she did needed to be redone so she changed her flight to Wednesday afternoon. The idea of another day without seeing her bothered me a hell of a lot more than it should have.
Cain was right. I was fucked when it came to Miriam. Even if he hadn’t said it, that’s what he’d meant.
I had to be at work when her plane landed and didn’t even want to get into how I remembered exactly what time her plane landed. Miriam insisted I not take the afternoon off to pick her up at the airport because she had her car in long term parking. Instead, I finagled her address out of her, realizing I didn’t already have it, and said I’d meet her there later.
Chapter Eight
In Hawaii, Miriam explained that she shared a house with five other women. When I got there before her, I decided to sit on the front step and wait. Which was weird. She should have been back already and nobody came out asking questions about why I lurked around so I figured they weren’t home.
When I saw her little mustang coming down the road, I jumped to my feet and suddenly had no idea what to do with my hands. I shoved them in my pockets then pulled them out only to fold my arms across my chest. Miriam turned me into a dork. At the last minute, I dropped my arms to the side hoping it looked at least somewhat natural.
She hopped out of the car with a smile, her chestnut hair pulled into a mess at the back of her head. Damn she was a sight for sore eyes.
“When you said you’d meet me here, I figured you meant after work,” she said with a smile. I couldn’t deny anything.
“You’re late,” I said back coming to a rest before her, my toes touching hers.
“Flight was delayed.”
Then, I couldn’t waste another second talking. I grasped her waist yanking her to me so I could taste her. That’s what I wanted anyway and when my tongue licked her closed mouth, it sprang open so I could dip inside. Fuck. Coconut.
My head started feeling fuzzy and I sounded like a girl. It was another thirty seconds before it dawned on me that the fuzziness came from lack of oxygen and she probably felt it, too. So I pulled back.
“Wow,” she huffed out. “Miss me?”
I didn’t want to answer.
“I’m sorry about that stuff earlier in the week,” I said doing my best to apologize.
She turned away from me toward the back of her car.
“Sorry. You’ll have to be more specific.” She popped her trunk then grabbed the suitcase out. I was quicker. She smiled then slammed the trunk shut.
Slipping my arm around her shoulders surprised the hell out of me yet not her.
Miriam’s arm went around my back, holding on to my hip as we walked to the front door.
“Because I fuck up so much?” I asked.
She dropped her head back with a laugh.
“That’s not what I meant,” she said.
“My reaction to the boyfriend talk. I’m sorry about that.”
She arched an eyebrow but didn’t ask anything further.
“Follow me.” She waved her hand at me. “A few of the roommates are here, so I don’t want to leave you unattended.” Once she mentioned them, I noticed the faint sound of music coming from the basement. “There’s a couple of bedrooms downstairs,” she said like she’d read my mind. I did as she said and followed her until we were inside her room and the door closed behind us.
Miriam’s room looked like the Miriam I knew. Maybe because I met her in Hawaii but that’s what it looked like. All tropical with bright colors, yellow on the walls, orange on her bed which sat against the wall to the right with a dresser and TV directly across from it. Behind the door she had a desk and a small refrigerator in the corner.
“Nice room,” I said.
“I spend a lot of time in here, so I like to be comfortable.” She pushed the suitcase to her closet.
“Why?”
“With five of us and various gentleman callers milling around out there you don’t always want to be surrounded by people, ya know?”
I nodded because I understood but being in California had me jonesing to be surrounded.
“Ugh, I need a shower. I smell like plane.”
“Smell great to me.”
She threw me a skeptical look.
“Hey, why don’t you just grab some clothes and shower at my place while I make us dinner?”
“You cook?” she asked with a raised eyebrow but grabbed a small duffle bag anyway.
“Yup.” My mom insisted on it, which I left out. “I’ll drive you back whenever you want.” Or not at all, I didn’t add. I had no way of justifying that thought. I’m a guy. It’d been a few months since I’d had sex and Miriam was hot. I’d wanted to fuck her the night I first walked her back to her hotel room, but I liked her too much. Which was so fucked up I couldn’t even measure it.
We were back in my car headed for my apartment within ten minutes. She was so low maintenance that she just threw a bunch of stuff, including shampoo and body wash that I just knew would fill my apartment with the aroma of coconut, and was ready to go.
I let her inside first, partly to be gentlemanly and partly because I liked the view from behind her and she headed o
ff to the shower first thing. I got to work. I took a couple of steaks out of the fridge and dropped them on the broiler, grabbed a bag of baby potatoes and put them in the microwave. Thank god for those little steaming bastards. Then worked on a salad. I was almost finished when she came out followed by her damn signature scent, hair still wet but brushed out straight.
She stood before me in what could only be described as her pajamas, pants and a tank top, which made me grind my teeth together. I wasn’t sure if her attire meant she wanted to stay over or she just wanted to be comfortable after traveling all day. With the time change, she’d already been awake an entire day’s worth of hours.
“It smells great in here,” she said as I pulled the steaks from the broiler.
“Yeah it does.” I’m pretty sure we meant different things on that one. “Do you want to eat at the table or on the couch?”
“Really? We could eat on the couch? You wouldn’t mind?”
I shook my head.
“Couch.” She looked tired enough to fall asleep standing. Miriam took two steps my way. I brushed her off, telling her to go get comfortable. It was weird how quickly taking care of someone comes back to a person.
I handed off the plate I made and set a glass of water on the coffee table in front of her. She’d mentioned once that she preferred water because it was really good for the skin. Then I went back to grab my own dinner. When I scrolled through the programs on TV, there really wasn’t much on, so I settled on a rerun of a sitcom we both liked. After a while I knew I had to finish what I’d started back at her place.
“I haven’t had a girlfriend in a long time.” I think my voice took her by surprised. Her eyebrows shot up but she kept chewing as she watched me.
“I have a hard time believing that,” she finally said out of the side of her mouth before swallowing whatever was in there. “You don’t really seem to be the type of guy to go without sex for too long. Not that I’d know from experience or anything.”
I snorted. This girl was direct.
“That’s not what I’m talking about.” And what I really don’t want to talk about. “I mean a girlfriend. Someone I see regularly. Someone I consider.”
“And?”
I shrugged. This was harder than I thought it’d be.
“I consider you.”
Her lips turned up as if to smile.
“The reason I got weird on the phone—” I didn’t let her reply before I got it all out. “Is because high school was the last time I had an actual girlfriend, and I’d kind of assumed I never would again.”
“I told you I didn’t—”
“Let me finish.” I held up a hand stopping her and set my plate on the coffee table then turned so I could face her fully. “I know what you weren’t doing. The thing that freaked me out wasn’t that you’d called me your boyfriend to some dickhead in New York. What freaked me out is that I liked it.”
“Yeah?” Now she smiled widely.
“Yeah. And I know this isn’t high school and shit, but I’d like for you to continue referring to me that way. You know, exclusive. Not seeing other people.”
Her smile grew even wider. Fuck…she’s amazing.
“Ok.” That was it. She didn’t even stop eating as this monumental thing happened between us. Then like a dipshit, I reminded myself that this was normal for most people. I was the only one who saw this as huge. I just went with it and let it go.
After we finished eating, I let her curl up on the couch, actually, I insisted on it because my girl looked exhausted. My girl. Weird. While she did that, I took the dishes into the kitchen to clean everything up and start the dishwasher before coming back out to join her.
Miriam had already fallen asleep on the couch when I got back. In that moment, I didn’t know what the right thing to do was versus what my body screamed to do. My options were to leave her there, wake her up to take her home or maybe carry her into my bed where she could be more comfortable. I ruled out option two almost immediately. No way in hell would I take her home until she asked me to. So leave her there or put her in my bed.
It wasn’t really a difficult decision to make.
Before I gathered her up, I ran in to turn my bed down so I wouldn’t have to jostle her as much. Then, as gently as I could, I inched my arms under her neck and upper thighs then lifted slowly. Felt like she weighed practically nothing but my heart hammered against my chest so loudly I thought for sure it’d wake her.
It didn’t.
Pulling the sheet and blanket up over her, I stood there like a creeper for a good minute or two watching as she burrowed down further into the crisp white sheets. I might have stood there all night if it weren’t for the beep of my phone. I’d silence the ringer but not the text alerts.
Flannery’s pregnant.
It said it was from Cain but I checked a second time like I knew another Flannery. Nope. It was him. I called and he answered on the second ring.
“What the fuck, Dude?” I said before he got a word out. “I know you know how to use a condom. We figured that shit out together years ago.”
Cain groaned. “You make it sound so dirty.”
“Gross. Don’t try to distract me.”
He chuckled low into the phone.
“I’ve been calling you for two days, was about to head to bed when I realized you returned exactly zero of those calls. I needed to get your attention.”
“Flannery’s not pregnant?”
“Ha. No. And I fucking hope I didn’t just jinx myself because if I did it’s your fucking fault.”
“Not me, man. Flan never took me up on any of those offers. What’s up?”
“I haven’t talked to you about Miriam since you called me freaking out. Just touching base. She’s back right?”
“Yeah, just got back. Actually she’s sleeping.”
“In your bed or hers?”
“Mine.”
Cain made a suggestive noise in his throat.
“It’s not like that, man.” I shook my head even though he wouldn’t be able to see it.
Cain sighed. “Can you do me a solid?”
I waited for the second half before agreeing.
“If at any point you feel like freaking out on the poor girl, call me first.” Still no reaction from me. “Sam, I’m serious. It’s been a long time, you need to let shit go. Not all girls are Emily.”
With the mention of her name, my back went rigid. I didn’t want to talk about her.
“Will do, Dad. Anything else?”
“Did you get Flannery’s pictures from the party?”
I tried not to let out an audible groan. Yeah I got them but why the hell had he let her send them? All it did was remind me that they were there and I wasn’t. Seeing their happy fucking faces made me want to put my hand through a wall. Leaving Miriam for Michigan became less and less appealing as the days went by but the draw to be with my family and friends still pulled at me.
“Yup.”
Now Cain sighed. With the way I’d clipped the word out, he’d know better than to push me further.
“All right, then. I’ll let you get back to the hot girl in your bed.”
“Knock it off,” I said with an honest chuckle.
I hung up with him then snuck back into my room for a pair of pajama bottoms of my own. It didn’t look like she’d moved at all.
It was still early but I shut everything down and locked up, changed in the bathroom then tip toed back into the bedroom. After making sure my alarm was set, I slowly slid into bed. It’d been a long ass time since a girl spent the night with me and here I laid on my side staring at her like an idiot. Sighing, I rolled onto my back thinking that if I wasn’t looking at her, my dick would calm the fuck down because yeah, the big guy sprang to attention as soon as I saw her there again. It didn’t help when Miriam snuggled right into my side and her hand fell on my stomach. Guess I’d get used to blue balls.
In the morning, I woke to Miriam’s face at my side watching me
sleep. Her head propped on her hand and she had this look on her face. Rested…yes. Playful…definitely. On the plus side, she didn’t look pissed at all.
“Morning,” I ground out, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.
“Morning,” she said back quietly. “Imagine my surprise when I woke up from an extremely comfortable sleep to find that I was, in fact, not at home in my own bed. Did I miss something?” A smile played at her lips so I knew she wasn’t pissed.
“You fell asleep on the couch, and I didn’t want to wake you.” I pushed up so my back leaned against the headboard. She did the same. “That ok?”
“Sure. Your bed is great.” She stretched her arms over her head, and it took every bit of my will power not to let my eyes drop from her face. Her little tank top didn’t leave much to the imagination so I was tempted to allow myself a peek but I didn’t. “Your alarm went off a few minutes ago.”
“Yeah, I have to get ready for work.”
“Better get moving then.” Miriam gave me a little push.
Before I moved away, I leaned over for a kiss. I couldn’t help it. It wasn’t like I dove in, I just wanted a little peck before I hopped in the shower.
When I came back out, dressed for work, Miriam was also dressed in clothes other than the ones she’d been wearing when she arrived last night, sitting at the island eating toast. Something warm settled in my stomach at how comfortable she already became in my space.
“You look nice,” I said kissing the top of her head as I passed. She did in everything. I wasn’t going to have time to eat, so I just grabbed a cup of coffee.
“I brought extra clothes just in case.” She threw me a grin. “Are you going to have time to drop me off at home?”
“If you want.” I took another long drink. “Or you could drive me to work and keep my car. Or hang out here today. Whatever you want.”
“I need to do a few things. If you don’t care then I’ll use your car and pick you up after work.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
In an odd turn, I let her drive me. Not like she was a horrible driver, she wasn’t, it was unusual for someone else to be in control. She dropped me off a couple of blocks from work at the coffee shop. I needed another cup and perhaps a pastry. Whether I wanted to admit it or not, I was hungry. Without thinking about it, I leaned over for a kiss goodbye then hopped out. It wasn’t until I stood on the sidewalk and Miriam drove away that I even thought about it.
Up for Everything (Up for Grabs #3) Page 7