by AJ Nuest
Shit, she smelled good. Like warm sheets and a hint of coconut. Sex and dreams and the useless hope he could somehow figure out a way to always have her in his life.
“Oh, hello.” She wiggled her ass with a husky chuckle, bumping the hard-on he couldn’t help and didn’t care to hide. “How long were you standing there?”
“Five seconds.” Flicking the tail of her shirt aside, he slid his palm up her ribcage, and it took all of one flutter of her lashes to figure out exactly what he wanted next.
The food could wait. His stomach had gone without longer than two days before, and he had more urgent needs to fill.
Wedging his foot between her ankles, he knocked her feet apart. A bend of his knees, and her pulse kicked under his tongue as he seated himself right where he belonged. “You made a mess of the kitchen.”
“If you’re going for mad, I should probably warn you that really isn’t the vibe you’re giving off. And I think what you meant to say was I made use of the kitchen.” Lifting her hand, she wrapped her arm around his neck, nails raking his scalp as she wriggled closer. The angle of her hips drove him higher and tighter along the heat of her sex as she propped her heels on his feet. “God, you feel good.”
Nowhere near as good as she did. Damn, he was so bound up in her, there wasn’t a single place on her body he didn’t want to lick, nip or suck.
The front of her shirt pleated over his wrist, slipping down his forearm as he cupped and palmed her breast. He brushed her nipple with his thumb and she shivered, reaching down to stroke and press his erection harder between her legs. Her hips began a rhythmic swaying, and he met each sinful gyration as she rode forward then back along the pounding arc of his cock.
Jesus, she was perfect. He jerked her tighter against him as that silky skin beaded to a tight peak. Her head fell back to his shoulder, and she fisted his hair to tug and twist the strands. She was so keyed in to how he liked it, their sexual needs synced like they’d been designed as two sides of a matched set.
Leaning over her, he clasped her inner thigh and slowly straightened. His fingertips met the mouth-watering crease at the top of her leg, and a breath caught in her throat as he brushed the slick folds of her sex.
Christ. She wasn’t only wet and ready, she was bare-assed naked under those shorts. The goofy woman should’ve known better than to leave that sweet temptation within reach.
One glide of his middle finger down the center and her spine bowed. “Shit, I love your hands on my body.” Tension cinched her ass and thighs as he tapped and teased her entrance with a light stroke.
Yes. That’s what he needed. What he craved. Another teasing swirl, and he cursed as her clit hardened and she ground against the heel of his hand. From the way she reacted, she’d become every bit as lost in him as he had in her.
And it blew him away. He wanted all of her, of them. As much and for however long life decided they should get.
Greed screamed to the forefront and pushed reason aside in his head. Inching forward, he urged her to the counter with his chest and flattened her hands along the top. He wanted to feel her. A quick yank to the drawstring on her shorts and the waistband went slack. Craved her skin to skin. The material slipped off her hips, and he tugged it to her knees at the same time his shorts hit the floor. He was desperate to know every inch of her if only for a few blissful seconds.
“Do you trust me?” He’d been tested, had never messed around with unprotected sex in the past. And based on the full physical Eden had insisted Tanner undergo before joining Dirty Deeds, he was confident she was outside the danger zone, as well.
“You know I do.” She turned her cheek to the counter, legs trembling from the way she remained perched on her toes. One look at the way she was spread and ready for him, and he gripped his cock against the thick pulse that heated and swelled in his balls.
Damn, she was beautiful. Right down to the white gauze he’d taped along those painful reminders on her hip.
The first time he’d laid eyes on her scars, he’d been nearly frantic trying to come up with a way to change what she’d been through. To work out how he could travel back through time and rewrite history so he could make all her heartbreak disappear.
“I’m clean, Ben. Just use this when you’re ready.” She worked one of her hands under her chest and foil crinkled as she pulled a condom from the breast pocket of her shirt. “I’ve never known anything like this before. You have me. Just like you said this morning, whatever I have is yours.”
Jesus H. Christ. His heart wrenched as he stepped between her legs, molding himself along her back and kissing wherever his lips landed. Her cheek, her ear, her hair…his fingers curling through hers and holding tight to her hands so she would understand what his mouth refused to say.
Now, there was no way he’d change one thing about her. Not one goddamn thing. The fire, her scars, that stupid fucking list—those experiences defined her. Made her who she was just like all the bullshit he’d lived through defined him.
Together they fit. She made him feel things in ways he’d never known existed. She was exactly the person she should be and, goddamn it, so was he. If wanting her to stay the same made him an asshole, then so be it. He wasn’t giving her up no matter what kinda nightmare was thrown at them next.
His gut, lungs, heart all seized with the reality of that thought, but he didn’t—couldn’t bring himself to back away. He’d never been the type to stand down no matter what fucked up circumstances were tossed in his face, and he wasn’t about to start doing so with Tanner.
He loved her. Christ, on some level, it was clear he always had. Every sneaky, infuriating, stubborn, sexy, drive-him-batshit-crazy trait that completed her and then some.
“You knew, didn’t you?” He nipped her earlobe and she grinned, shimmying her ass and her thighs brushing his. “You knew I was gonna come in here looking for a repeat performance of this morning and you were ready before I even got out of bed.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She batted her lashes. Then winked.
“You’re a shit.” Another nip to her ear, and he drove against her. Her fingertips whitened on the counter as he pinned her in place with his hips.
Moving forward, he was gonna do whatever it took to be worthy of her, and if that meant shoving words past his throat before he was ready or peeling back another layer to expose the raw pain underneath, then that’s what he would do.
She’d become more to him than the sum of his past, present or future. She’d become a tether that drew him back to the land of the living. His chance for things he’d believed a long time ago had been beyond hope.
Nuzzling her ear, he took another penetrating grind along the sweet curves of her ass. “I suggest you hold onto something. You’re about to get the ride of your life.”
A shudder wracked her shoulders, and he chuckled as that telltale sign traveled into his chest. Yep. He’d gotten to her, which made item number one on his agenda wringing as much pleasure from her body as he could.
Straightening behind her, he slipped the condom from her hand and tore back the strip, placing the disc in his palm so he’d be ready the second it was needed. One hand at her slender nape, he folded her shirt to her waist and brushed his thumb along the small divot at the top of her crease.
She whimpered and her back arched, legs shaking and straining as she leaned into his touch. A bead of sweat trickled down his back. Nerves tingled at the base of his spine and his ass clenched.
“You like that?” Another deliberate swirl of his thumb along that same spot, and she panted, pushing harder as he dragged two slow pumps along her sex.
A hiss cooled his teeth as her ass cheeks parted over the base of his cock. She was so fucking sweet. Swiveling and grinding, he jammed his hand between her legs and squeezed himself closer.
The pulsing rim met the distended nub jutting from her folds, and he cursed as warmth spread, wet and slippery along the head. Fuck, he needed inside her. Ached
for it like nothing he’d ever known. He wanted her clamping down around him, gloving and milking him as she came.
“Don’t move.” Easing back, he prodded her entrance with the tip and her moan mixed with his as he tapped her clit, pushing deeper. Shit, she felt good. So goddamn warm and tight.
The stretch flexed, gripping and kneading each throbbing vein as he came forward. She rippled around him and he gritted his teeth against the urge to pound into her until the lights dimmed and she shattered in his hands.
Reaching farther, he forked his fingers around where they were joined, keeping his thumb poised to let her find the right pressure, to let her ride him as she writhed and squirmed.
“Harder.” A roar built in his ears as she grabbed the back of his thigh, forcing him higher inside. He bumped resistance and groaned as ecstasy triggered down his spine.
She tightened around him. Gasped and fisted her hands. His eyes slammed shut, fingers digging into her hip as he urged her forward then back. Driving into her slick path over and over until she clamped down around him and spasms ricocheted down his shaft.
No. He stopped mid-stroke and held her in place, blowing a harsh breath to clear his head. It was too much. One more glide, and they’d be shit out of luck.
He wasn’t doing that to her. To them. A growl heaved up from his chest as he pulled out and strapped the condom in place. At the same time, leaving her when they were both so close, came down somewhere around eight degrees of insane.
Snaking a tight grip around her waist, he scooped her off the counter. Fingers splayed along the top, he braced his arm down the length of hers. A tilt of his hips, and he gradually brought them together until he was seated all the way home. She smacked a firm hold to his wrist, her body trembling. Lifting his palm to her cheek, he turned her head and kissed her long and slow and deep.
“God, Ben. I can’t…”
He eased off and rammed them together, bringing her to her toes. She tossed her head back and he plunged again, urging her to his lips as she convulsed and the aftershocks flooded and heated his cock. His balls hitched, sparks detonated down his legs. He groaned into her mouth as his orgasm hit like a freight train and a shudder rocked him from shoulders to hips.
He was torn apart. Pulsed inside her a second time and the pieces were smashed back together. He tangled his tongue with hers and stayed right where he was, soaking in the moment as the two of them swayed as one.
“Holy shit.” A weak chuckle spilled from her chest, and he cinched her against his waist as their tremors slowly subsided. “Damn. Good God, Ben. Have you ever had it be so—”
“No.” Not anywhere even remotely close. Using his chin, he brushed a few damp strands away from her ear to kiss and nip her neck. “It’s you, Tanner. You make me…”
What? Break every promise he’d made to never reopen his heart? Wish things were different so he could keep her protected from all the dangers lurking outside the cabin? “Whole.”
Her brow twitched. She searched his gaze. Two heavy heartbeats thudded in his chest before she lifted her hand and pressed his palm to her face. “I think that just might be the most beautiful gift anyone has ever given me.”
He huffed, guiding her forehead down to his lips. No one had ever referred to anything about him as a gift, though he was fully in touch with the feeling. And yet, when it came to describing the devastating emotions that knocked him sideways every time he looked at her, words failed.
But maybe, just this once, he didn’t need to come up with something soppy to say. Tipping her mouth within easy reach, he tasted her again and again, knowing he’d never get his fill even if he somehow figured out a way to keep her secluded within the walls of this safe haven.
Eventually, they’d starve to death. Not that he could bring himself to care.
In this moment, he had everything he needed. Only her.
“You’ve been a gift for me, too, Tanner. You’ve been a gift for me, too.”
Chapter 16
Lying on her stomach, elbows propped on the bed, Tanner tapped the attachment on Xander’s latest text and grimaced as the image of a digitally aged sixteen-year-old Casper Addison downloaded onto the screen.
Shit. She closed her eyes. Her crossed ankles stopped swinging. After experiencing the most mind-blowing twenty-four hours of her life, that harsh smack of reality was the last thing she’d wanted to see.
Not that ignoring Adder and whatever role he played in Trey’s case would do her any damn good. Especially after the confusing messages Xander had sent, asking her to tell Ben that Eden and Kelly were safe and everyone else on the team had been officially moved into the manor.
Unbeknownst to her, it appeared the highest ranking narcotics detective in the city had been busy issuing orders. All fine and dandy…except for the fact Tanner didn’t want to put Xander in a difficult position by asking him why. Sure, Adder was a threat. She could totally see why Ben would insist Xander keep Casper away from Trey. The thing she didn’t get was why Ben would think it necessary the entire Dirty Deeds family go to the extent of leaving their homes.
Far as she knew, Casper wasn’t after the organization as a whole. And the thing that really sucked was whether or not this was nothing more than Ben’s usual protective instincts kicking into high gear, she now had no choice but to bring up a subject she seriously did not want to broach.
Staring at Casper’s picture, she smacked her lips at the sour taste the image left on her tongue. Honestly, she’d be better off popping a balloon and startling Ben out of an episode of sleepwalking. She just didn’t know how he was going to react, and hated the idea that opening such a horrible can of worms was gonna make him shut down and revert back to the same ol’ angry, closed-off man he’d been before they’d gotten to the cabin.
Chewing her bottom lip, she saved the attachment and typed a response. But, the bottom line was, the two of them needed to talk. Make some hard decisions and soon. Twice while they’d been eating the lights of a DOT truck had flashed past the windows, plow down and salt spraying the road. And other than a bunch of selfish reasons for wanting him all to herself, there was no longer any real excuse for her and Ben to stay.
Got it. Thanks, X. I’ll let Ben know and we’ll be in touch ASAP.
She tapped send and tossed her cell to the bed, sighing as it bounced to the corner. Never, in a billion years, had she imagined she’d get so caught up in Ben. Turned out, he wasn’t just the epitome of sex on wheels, though he definitely had that trait covered in spades.
The things that came out of his mouth were sometimes so incredibly romantic, she wanted to crawl inside him and live there. Like, forever. Since the moment he’d told her about his mom and sister, he’d been different. In a good way. Raving about her cooking skills and scarfing down every bit of food she’d put on his plate. Insisting on cleaning up the kitchen so he could check in with Captain D’Avella and bring her up to speed on a few things while Tanner used the time to shower and change.
To her surprise, he could be playful when the mood struck. Other times, he cracked her up with his wicked dry sense of humor. Only so he could flip on a dime and be every bit as affectionate and sweet. The intensity of his kisses blew anything she’d ever known completely out of the water. And his laugh. Dear God, whenever that deep rumble shook his shoulders, her heart cart-wheeled and it was all she could do to keep track of time and space.
She didn’t want any of that to end. Dropping her forehead to the blankets, she pounded her face against the mattress. She’d already started down the slippery slope of falling head over heels for the guy, and couldn’t stand the thought of all the beautiful moments they’d shared being shoved aside like they’d never happened.
Her frustrated moan heated the blankets. “I’m so screwed.”
“What’s the matter?”
She lifted her head to find him standing near the bed, hair wet and smelling like a fresh shower, all tall tatted muscle ending in a pair of bare feet.
Ei-chi-wa-wa. Talk about bringing everything she stood to lose into focus.
The camouflage med kit he kept in the bathroom dangled from his right hand. In his left, he held the loose ends of a forest green bath towel around his hips, trimmed beard accenting his sharp jaw and forehead creased in one of those gritty squints that came off broody and tense.
Hot damn. Her hand to God, the guy was a study in perfection of the human male form.
“Stay right there.” Holding her finger in the air, she snatched her phone off the bed and pulled up the camera app to snap several pictures. She wanted to capture him exactly like he was. So she could keep the visual of him—wet and half-naked—tucked away for future reference.
Within the 3x5 inch screen, he cocked a brow. Delicious ridges flexed around his ribcage as he shifted his weight onto one hip. “You about done?”
Inside her head, da Vinci’s Vitruvian Man slumped in defeat and stepped aside to let Ben take center stage in the middle of the circle.
Tipping to the side, she faked a smile. All teeth. “Any way I can get you to ditch the towel?”
He rolled his eyes and walked the case to the nightstand. Following him with her phone, she happily snapped away as he turned and rounded the bed for a battered dresser centered under the high bedroom window.
A second later, the towel crumpled to the floor and she grinned, an evil chuckle warming the back of her throat as he tossed a wink over his shoulder. Firing at the speed of a machine gun, she got off as many shots as she could. The width of his shoulders, the planked vee of his torso and completely biteable ass were enough to make any woman purr in feminine appreciation.
He stepped into a pair of worn blue jeans and yanked them onto his hips, secured the first few buttons on the fly and left the top two open near his waist.
Uh-h-h, yum? She tapped two more shots.
“Okay, come on.” A flop across the pillows and the bed jostled her elbows as he one arm stretched toward the nightstand, dragging the med kit onto the bed. “We should’ve changed your bandage first thing this morning.”