[2012] The Seven Steps to Closure

by Donna Joy Usher

  I hadn’t paid much attention to the other two girls during the course – being quite intent on my note-taking – so I didn’t notice them noticing Matt. It did, however, become quite apparent during lunch, just how much noticing of Matt they had done.

  ‘So how long have you two been dating?’ Angie – a blonde, busty English girl – asked, while staring longingly at Matt.

  I had a sudden, intense urge to scratch out both her eyes so she would stop looking at him like he was a lollipop waiting to be licked.

  ‘Oh about 10 months now,’ Matt said as he dragged my chair closer to him and threw an arm over the back of it.

  She pouted a little and I smiled sweetly at her. It took all my willpower not to poke out my tongue.

  ‘But, like, you’re not engaged or anything?’ asked Victoria, twisting wisps of her brunette hair around her finger while she stared at my ring-less left hand.

  I could feel blood rushing to my head and battle lust kicking in. So it wasn’t enough that we were dating – not that we actually were, but you know what I mean.

  ‘No, we’re not married yet,’ I said as I looked her in the eye, ‘but we’ve just found out we’re expecting our first child.’ I placed one hand over my belly.

  ‘Oh,’ said Angie tartly, ‘is that why you’re eating so much?’

  She looked primly at her own plate, which had hardly any food on it, to mine which was covered with the smeary remains of a large lunch.

  I smiled inwardly knowing how much Matt detested fussy eaters.

  ‘Yep,’ he said, reaching over and patting my belly, ‘she’s eating for two.’

  Victoria looked confused. ‘So, like, you’ve only been dating for 10 months and you’re already having a baby. And you’re happy with this?’ She directed the question to Matt.

  Matt shrugged and said, ‘The first moment I laid eyes on Tara I said to myself “that’s the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with”.’

  He was looking straight into my eyes as he said it and I could feel blood rushing to my head.

  ‘What about you?’ the blonde asked me.

  I was, truth be told, feeling light-headed from the intense eye contact Matt and I were sharing. ‘Well,’ I said slowly, ‘I had come out of a bad relationship, so I was a little cautious at first.’

  ‘She played hard to get,’ Matt smiled as he said it, reaching out and stroking my arm.

  ‘But the next time we ran into each other, it was like a bolt of lightning had struck me and I knew without doubt that he was the one for me,’ I said.

  Angie pouted and slouched back in her chair, chewing on the end of some hair. ‘So it was, like, love at first sight?’

  ‘Pretty much,’ said Matt. ‘I didn’t believe in love at first sight until I saw you.’ He tucked a stray piece of hair behind my ear.

  Whoa. Were we still make-believing? He was so convincing that I was having a bit of trouble with my brain – which was leaping around inside my skull high fiving itself, and my lungs – which were refusing to breathe properly. As we stared into each other’s eyes I could hear pieces of a puzzle clicking into place inside my head. The trouble was I wasn’t sure if I was playing the right game.

  ‘I’m bored,’ Angie complained to Victoria.

  ‘Come on hon,’ Matt said, gallantly helping me to my feet, ‘we should do some sightseeing before you have your afternoon nap.’

  ‘What? Oh yeah. I get very tired now,’ I told the two of them as I climbed to my feet.

  ‘Wow,’ I said to Matt, once we were clear and I could think straight, ‘they were tigers.’

  ‘I don’t like cats much,’ he said. ‘I’m allergic to them.’

  We spent the afternoon getting lost in the back alleys of Udaipur. We shopped, and admired the view of the city, and as the sun was setting we found ourselves at the City Palace overlooking the lake, where we had a couple of beers. Then we stumbled across a quaint little restaurant called The Secret Garden.

  ‘My,’ I said as we entered the rambling garden with its sprawling lounges and many cushions.

  We drank more beer, and then ordered some thali. They brought out one huge platter for both of us, full of steaming food.

  ‘Dahl,’ I said, dipping some naan bread in one of the dishes. ‘Yummy. Here.’

  I held out some naan filled with dahl for Matt, expecting him to take it. He leaned forwards and the feel of his lips grazing my fingers sent a bolt of electricity through me. My nipples were immediately rock hard.

  Matt held some chicken masala out to me. ‘Here,’ he said.

  I leant forward, hoping he couldn’t see my nipples through my shirt, and he placed it in my mouth. Indian food had never tasted so good.

  We ordered some more beer and kept eating in silence except for our murmurings of appreciation for the food.

  I took a bite of a curry puff and held it out to him to try. He fed me some butter chicken and laughed when I ended up with it on my chin. I wiped it off and slowly licked my finger looking into his eye as I did it. Had his pupils widened slightly? I couldn’t be sure.

  The combination of the heat, the beer and my need to be closer to him was making me giddy. I stood up to go to the bathroom and stumbled a little.

  ‘Whoa,’ I said giggling. ‘Matt, I think I’m a little drunk.’

  ‘Me too,’ he said as I walked unsteadily off to the toilets.

  I had a really good talk to myself while I was in there. It went along the lines of, Okay Tara let’s just take it down a notch. I think the alcohol is affecting your judgement if you really think that he is into you. So let’s just be cool and if there is any move to be made, let him make it.

  When I exited the toilets, it was to find Matt with the two tigers from lunch all over him. Shit, just when things were going really nicely between us.

  ‘Ahh here she is,’ he said, sounding relieved. ‘Ready to go, love?’ he asked jumping up.

  ‘Sure sure,’ I said and then looked at the table and the pile of tallies we had drunk. ‘I think you’ve had quite enough to drink young man, time to get you home to bed.’

  ‘It’s good to have a designated driver,’ said Matt, taking my hand and letting me lead him to the exit.

  We staggered up the street leaning on each other.

  ‘Do you think they’ll follow us?’ I asked looking over my shoulder. Instead of finding Angie and Victoria, I found myself staring straight into the eyes of a cow. I looked down to check and corrected myself. I was staring right into the eyes of a bull.

  ‘Matt,’ I whispered, ‘there’s a bull behind us.’

  ‘Yep,’ he said, ‘there’s a lot of bull behind us.’

  ‘No really Matt.’ I looked again to be sure. He was following us, and he was scary. Someone had painted his horns bright red. ‘There’s an actual bull following us up the street.’

  Matt stopped and looked over his shoulder. ‘By George I think you’re right,’ he said. Then he flapped his hands at it and said, ‘Shoo.’

  ‘Shoo?’ I asked incredulously, starting to giggle. ‘He’s a bull, not a mosquito.’

  ‘How about, “go away you big bad bull”?’ he said in a high-pitched girly voice.

  Given the circumstances – it was one of the funniest things I had ever seen. The alcohol and my fear blended, leaving me with nervous hysteria. I started laughing and then I couldn’t stop. I watched the bull plod closer to me.

  ‘Stop,’ I gasped, gulping for air as I inched my way back up the hill.

  Matt continued to back with me while shoo-ing his hands at it.

  ‘That’s the best you’ve got?’ I asked, after a particularly feeble bout of hand shoo-ing.

  ‘Fraid so,’ Matt said, ‘I can’t seem to stop him. What we really need is a stick,’ said Matt.

  ‘Good idea,’ I replied, looking around desperately for one as the bull got closer. ‘Are you going to hit him with it?’

  ‘No, I’m going to throw it for him.’

  ‘Matt, he’s a cow
not a dog.’

  ‘Oh right.’

  ‘He’s going to get me,’ I gasped as he lumbered even closer. Normally in times like this, my fright-or-flight mechanism took over allowing me to break Olympic records for sprinting short distances. This time I was having trouble getting my legs to do what I told them. I think it was a combination of the alcohol and the laughing.

  ‘Hey, do you think it might just be walking up the hill?’ Matt asked.

  I darted to the side, holding my breath while the bull plodded on by.

  ‘I guess he was,’ I said, leaning over and laughing so hard I couldn’t stand up straight. ‘I really thought he was going to attack me.’

  ‘I don’t think he had enough speed up to do any real damage,’ gasped Matt between laughs.

  ‘Ohh.’ I straightened up and wiping tears from my eyes, stepped straight into a huge pile of steaming cow dung. I could feel the warmth of it wrapping over the end of my toes. ‘Oh no,’ I said as I felt my foot slipping out from underneath me.

  I was like a cartoon character with my arms and feet peddling backwards in an attempt to regain my balance: finally losing the battle and collapsing with a huge ‘whoompf’, straight into the pile of dung.

  ‘Oh dear,’ I said. I could feel it seeping through my clothes.

  ‘Oh dear?’ asked Matt, thumping his hand onto his knee as he buckled over with laughter. ‘Oh dear?’ he said as he slid to the ground next to me. And then he saw the remnants of poo oozing out from underneath me. ‘Oh dear,’ he said. And then we both lost it.

  ‘Stop. Stop,’ I begged him as I howled with laughter. ‘I think I’m going to wet myself.’

  ‘Go ahead,’ said Matt, gesturing at my pooey pants. ‘It won’t make any difference.’

  ‘It’s a matter of pride,’ I tried to explain. But he only laughed harder.

  Finally, he clambered to his feet. ‘Come on,’ he said holding out a hand, ‘we have to get you home and into the shower.’

  ‘Yucky,’ I said as I walked up the street. I was leaving pooey footprints behind, and my pants were stuck to my arse. I reeked.

  ‘Don’t make me look,’ said Matt, ‘or I’ll probably wet myself.’

  I took my shoes off when we got to the hotel. ‘After you,’ I said politely gesturing at the stairs to our room.

  Matt led us into the room and I headed straight for the bathroom.

  I looked at myself in the mirror and started to giggle. ‘I’m disgusting,’ I called out.

  ‘I know. I can still smell you.’

  I stripped the filthy pants off and then looked at my shoes. They had been pretty satin slip-ons I had bought in Delhi; now brown liquid poo stained the shiny material.

  ‘I don’t think my shoes can be saved,’ I said.

  ‘I’m not surprised. I’ll go and get a laundry bag for your clothes,’ he called out as I hopped into the shower.

  A few minutes later, I was clean again. I wrapped a white towel around me and then realised I had no clothes to put on. I’d have to duck out and get them before Matt got back from downstairs.

  Darting into the bedroom towards my bag, I stopped in fright when I saw movement in the door to the balcony. I gasped and then realised it was Matt – standing there, staring at me.

  ‘I didn’t hear you come back,’ I said, realising just how short the towel was. It only just covered my bottom.

  Matt stood still in the same spot, seemingly transfixed by his view of me. I could feel my breathing getting heavier as I met his eyes. I licked my lips nervously. He moved towards me, stopping just short. ‘You’re so beautiful,’ he said, reaching out a hand to my face. I felt myself moving towards him as if in a dream.

  He trailed his fingers down my face as if mesmerised by the feel of me. In their wake I could feel tingling spreading out and dancing across my skin.

  ‘Matt,’ I whispered as his fingers reached my neck, ‘I think you need to kiss me.’

  He pulled me closer and bent his head to mine, and finally I got to feel his sweet lips – once again – caressing mine. I melted towards him, into him, distressed when he pulled away. ‘I’ve wanted to do this to you ever since I saw you on that plane,’ he said, running a hand through my wet hair.

  I stared up into his beautiful eyes. ‘Do what?’ I asked breathlessly, hoping it was to rip the towel off my body and have his wicked way with me.

  ‘This.’ He picked me up easily, laying me on the bed in my towel. Then he proceeded to unwrap me. First he unwrapped my body as he peeled back my towel, and then he unwrapped my mind as he caressed me and kissed me, driving me crazy with my need for him. I writhed in ecstasy beneath him as I clutched at his clothes trying to shred them from his body.

  ‘Not fair,’ I complained in between frantic kisses, ‘you’ve still got your clothes on.’

  He hopped off the bed and let his pants fall to the floor.

  I groaned in anticipation looking at him in all his glory. And I mean all of it. He had an erection that would have made King Kong proud.

  ‘Is that for me?’ I asked teasingly, watching him roll on a condom.

  ‘It’s all yours baby,’ he said, smiling as he climbed back onto the bed to kneel over me.

  If I had thought I had felt good up till then, it was nothing compared to how good I felt when I finally felt him slide inside me.

  ‘Oh – my – God.’ I could feel my eyes rolling back in my head. ‘I’ve wanted you to do this to me ever since you stopped doing it to me the first time.’ I gasped as he thrust further and further into me. I wrapped my legs around him and clasped his rock hard buttocks in my hands. The feeling of his body on mine, his lips on mine, his tongue in my mouth and his hands on my body – I was having trouble breathing with the overwhelming sensuality of it. I groaned and urged him on harder and faster as I moved my hips to match his rhythm.

  ‘I think I’m going to come,’ he said, sounding dismayed.

  Lifting my pelvis up, I encouraged him even deeper inside me. ‘Then come,’ I said as I dug my nails into his back. And he did.

  ‘Sorry,’ he apologised. ‘You feel so amazing and I’ve been imagining doing this to you for weeks now, I couldn’t stop myself.’ He started kissing and caressing me, moving slowly down my body. ‘I’ve also been imagining doing this to you,’ he said huskily as he placed his tongue on my clitoris and licked it.

  ‘Jesus Christ,’ I moaned, as he also stroked my nipples. I could feel the knot of tension inside me tighten even further. ‘Oh please,’ I heard myself cry, as I started to move rhythmically against his mouth. ‘Oh yes,’ I said, as I felt myself riding higher and higher towards an orgasm.

  And then he stopped just before I peaked and I let out a frustrated yelp.

  ‘Look what I found,’ he said, reaching for another condom as he nodded towards his erection.

  ‘Oh my,’ I said admiringly, ‘come to Momma.’

  He slid inside me and this time we came together. I bit his neck to stop from screaming as my body spasmed with my orgasm. I’d never felt anything like it. He shuddered inside me, in time with my climax, and then we both collapsed, exhausted onto the bed.

  I held him to me to stop him from moving, enjoying his body pressing me down; his naked skin on mine. I tried to memorise the feel of it but he started to kiss me lazily, nuzzling my neck and tickling my ear, and all of a sudden, I could have gone again, right then, right there.

  Eventually when we had both emerged from the cloud of lust he said, ‘To think, we could have been doing this the whole time.’

  I smiled at him and said, ‘Yes, but we wouldn’t have gotten any sightseeing done.’

  ‘I know what I’d rather be doing given a choice between sightseeing and making love to you.’

  ‘It’s all right,’ I said teasingly, ‘the lake is pretty spectacular.’

  ‘Hmm yes,’ he said, rolling over and kissing me, ‘but not as spectacular as you.’

  Then we made love again.

  * * *

 
I opened my eyes to the clear blue skies of Udaipur and the soft warmth of Matt’s chest against my back. Mmmm, so it hadn’t been a delicious dream. I moved my body experimentally. Yep, it certainly felt like it had had a night of passion. I smiled unable to believe my extremely good luck that this man wanted me, wanted to be with me. It all seemed too good to be true.

  ‘Good morning,’ he said, raising himself up and kissing me on the shoulder.

  I wriggled around in his embrace so I could kiss him on the lips and then said, ‘Right back at ya.’

  The kissing continued for several minutes, getting more and more intense until suddenly I screwed up my nose and pulled away.

  ‘Phew,’ I said. ‘What’s that smell?’

  ‘I think,’ said Matt laughing, ‘that you’ll find it’s your clothes.’

  ‘Oh no.’ I had totally forgotten about the dung covered clothing left deserted on the bathroom floor.

  He swung his feet out of bed saying, ‘I’ll take them down to the laundry and get us a coffee.’

  ‘I could kill for a coffee,’ I admitted, wrapping a sheet around me and climbing out of bed. ‘And I think the place needs airing.’ I opened the windows onto our balcony as far as they would go in an attempt to look busy, but really I was waiting for Matt to leave so I could commandeer the bathroom. I desperately wanted to check my hair and give my teeth a quick brush. I was sure I had morning breath.

  We were on the balcony drinking our coffee and enjoying the vista of the lake beneath us when I remembered something I had noticed the day before and wanted to ask him. ‘Hey what’s the deal with the whole Octopussy on the rooftop thing?’ I said.

  ‘Haven’t you seen Octopussy?

  Hating to seem ignorant, I shook my head.

  ‘Not a James Bond Fan?’

  ‘I don’t mind the latest one,’ I said.

  ‘So Daniel Craig is my competition then?’

  ‘Him and Edward.’

  ‘Edward?’

  ‘From Twilight.’

  He laughed. ‘Well I don’t think I have much to worry about there.’

  ‘I don’t think you have much to worry about with Daniel Craig either.’ I leant back on my chair. ‘So Octopussy is a James Bond movie?’