“Yes.”
Restlessly, Justin ran a hand through his hair. Why was Bill acting as if Sarah’s address and phone number were a national secret? Okay, so Bill felt sorry for Sarah. She had broken off with her fiancé and quit her job. Justin was sorry for her, too, but that might just work out to his best. Maybe he could hire Sarah for a week or two until she found a better job…unless she already had one. But first he had to locate her. This was all too much to take in at once. Just what did he really know about Sarah? Very little, he suddenly realized.
“So where is she?” he demanded, quickly reaching the end of his rope.
There was a hesitation, then a sigh. “Look, Justin, maybe since she didn’t tell you—”
“Where, Bill?” he demanded.
“Okay, okay! But if she’s mad at me—”
“Bill!”
“She’s living at a homeless shelter downtown near Second Street.”
Justin’s legs collapsed underneath him and he sank to the bed, stunned. “Homeless shelter?” he whispered, unable to believe what he was hearing.
“Yeah. Evidently, when she lost her job, she didn’t have enough money to pay her rent. She had to move out but had nowhere to go and wouldn’t let me help since I’m so newly married. She refuses to collect unemployment—”
“She was fired!” Justin shouted.
“As I said,” Bill continued without answering Justin’s question, “she comes in twice a week, looking for a job. The law office, it seems, was overstaffed and had to get rid of a secretary.”
“What’s the shelter’s name and number?”
“Why?”
“Because I’m going to call and leave a message for Sarah to expect me.”
“Sorry, bud, the shelter closes its doors at eight. Which also means no phone calls, either.”
“What do you mean, it closes its doors at eight?”
“Just what I said. Haven’t you ever been around shelters? In the morning the people are fed, then put out for the day. At the end of the day the shelters reopen and the occupants are allowed back in for supper. At eight this particular one closes its doors and no one else is allowed in. The place is usually full by six or so anyway.”
A sick feeling curled in Justin’s stomach. “What about Sarah?”
“What about her?”
“What if she’s late getting back? Would they let her in? I mean, if she had a good explanation?”
“Sarah’s staying at a very good shelter, Justin. Try not to worry. She’s been there a couple of weeks now. They’ve treated her well. They won’t turn her out.”
Cold fear filled Justin’s heart. “You’re not answering my question. If Sarah was late, would they let her in?”
“Sarah knows the rules. She wouldn’t have been late.”
Justin had his answer. “Thanks, Bill.”
“You okay?”
How could Justin answer that truthfully? “Yeah,” he lied.
Sarah, his sister-in-law, who had been here only thirty minutes ago, was living in a shelter. His sister-in-law, for pity sakes! Why hadn’t she come to him?
In a flash of insight he realized she had. Today. And he’d snipped at her from the time he’d opened the door, never giving her a chance to state her true purpose in coming.
Anger replaced the guilt. Oh, he’d asked, but she’d refused to tell Justin what was going on. It’d always been that way. Amy had been heartsick when Sarah had closed herself off from her only sister because Amy had married him. Of course Sarah had had a good reason for not speaking to him.
His anger deflated. They were both at fault. But why hadn’t she opened up to him tonight and told him she was penniless and living in a shelter?
Because she didn’t trust him. And he didn’t trust her. And she knew that.
Yet despite that, Justin admitted to his feelings of earlier today. True, he’d felt shock and anger when he’d seen her, then experienced a need to prove that he held nothing against her. But worst of all was the spark of interest he’d felt for her that had slowly made itself known as he’d noticed the sway of her hair, the tilt of her chin, the flash of her eyes…Self-loathing ate at him. This was Amy’s sister, not a woman who should interest him. Especially since he still didn’t completely trust her. But all that didn’t matter now. The only thing that mattered was that Sarah was living in a shelter.
His sister-in-law.
Mickie’s aunt.
There was no way he was going to let her stay there.
“So—” Bill broke the silence “—are you ready to talk?”
Justin sighed. Bill was his friend. He trusted Bill more than anyone else. Maybe he needed to confide in a friend. “I guess at the time of Amy’s death Sarah was a convenient person to blame. I was despondent, and according to Sarah, I unintentionally neglected Mickie because of my grief. Maybe Sarah had been acting in Mickie’s best interest by taking me to court…or at least she thought she was. I can tell you it certainly woke me up to what was going on around me and that I had a daughter who needed me.”
He wondered if Sarah had sensed that things weren’t as good between Amy and him as they’d appeared. Had Amy told Sarah she wanted a divorce?
The night of Amy’s death, she had admitted that her parents had encouraged the match, saying it was a way of showing the peace between their two families. Had Sarah known or suspected that? He’d been devastated when his wife had run from the house to go see the sister she hadn’t talked to in months, because she was tired of trying to “work things out” as he’d insisted they do.
“Amy was angry that every time Sarah and I were near each other we fought. I knew this and tried to curb my tongue, but something got my dander up each time the woman came by. Sarah obviously felt the same way. Amy was caught in the middle and maybe that was why Sarah had fought back the way she did. She had been trying to protect Amy. I just don’t know.”
Justin ran a weary hand over his face. “She went too far when she tried to take Mickie.”
Yes, it had jerked him out of his grief, but the strength he’d found was fueled by anger and hatred, not by God. Things had been disastrous at the trial, breaking the familial bonds between them forever. Or so he’d thought until today, when he’d found out that Sarah was living in a shelter and had tried in her own way to “bury the hatchet.”
“You know you can’t just go to her and force her to move home with you. If she thinks you’re offering her charity she’ll disappear. She’s a very proud woman.”
A very proud woman who was now out wandering the streets because the shelter’s doors had closed while she’d been watching Mickie for him. What could he say to Bill? Why hadn’t she told him? He had to do something.
An idea formed. Justin would bet that Sarah would be at the shelter tomorrow when the doors opened. She’d been staying there for a while, according to Bill. Yes, his plan just might work.
“Look, Bill, I’m desperate. I need a baby-sitter. I don’t know how to get a hold of Sarah. Could you contact her for me tomorrow when the shelter opens for breakfast? Tell her I called looking for her and need her help.”
Bill whistled on the other end. “She’s gonna go crazy when she finds out you know about her living in a shelter.”
“I understand. Maybe you can smooth that over, convince her I’m not handing out charity. My baby-sitter quit tonight and I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. I need someone—immediately! If it’ll help, tell her I’m desperate. You know her better than I do. Do what you have to and convince her to take the job. Call me first thing in the morning after you talk to her.”
“Sure thing. And, Justin?”
“Yeah?”
“It’s about time you faced this thing between you and Sarah.” With those words Bill hung up.
Justin slowly replaced the receiver, trying not to read more into Bill’s words than he’d intended. But the truth was, it was hard not to. Because, like a lightning bolt from the sky, he suddenly wondered if maybe that
had not been part of the problem all along. Had he married Amy partly out of guilt? Oh, he’d been attracted to her, but what he’d done to her family’s business had been part of the equation, too. Unfortunately, she’d married him only out of obligation to her family. He’d cared for Amy. At least on his part he had been willing to stay married forever. They had enjoyed a good comfortable relationship, and in his own way, he’d loved her.
But Bill’s words unsettled him more than they should have. Was it not possible that he’d known, on some deeper level, that Amy hadn’t loved him and he’d felt threatened by Sarah’s anger and dislike?
The possibility was too awful to consider. He didn’t want to think that he’d been so insecure back then that he had actually helped cause the wedge in his marriage.
With that thought, he slipped into bed and pulled the covers up to his waist. He would give Sarah a job, prove to her he held no grudges against her and prove to himself that there was really nothing between them at all. Then he’d have his peace again. He could close that part of his life and go forward to face whatever the future held, with no regrets or shadows from the past dogging his heels.
Chapter Three
The doorbell rang, but Justin didn’t rush forward the way he wanted to. He didn’t throw open the door and greet his sister-in-law with a blast of anger. Instead, he took two repetitive breaths, letting each one out slowly, readying himself for the battle he was sure to face. When he was certain he had control of his emotions, he calmly walked forward and pulled open the door.
She still wore the same jeans from yesterday. She’d changed her shirt, though, he noted. Instead of a white pullover, she wore a pink one.
“Well, are you done gawking at the charity case?”
He raised an eyebrow in silent query, but that only seemed to antagonize her.
“Don’t you dare pull that patronizing look on me. It won’t work. I’ve seen it before.”
“I’m not trying to be patronizing, Sarah. I just wondered why you were in such a sour mood already this morning. It’s not even ten a.m.”
She dropped her arms from where she’d crossed them and let them hang at her sides. However, she looked anything but relaxed; she looked ready to pounce on him and take him apart limb by limb.
“You know exactly what’s the matter. How could you get Bill involved in this?” she demanded. “He’s a friend I trusted, until he hunted me down this morning and told me you had called him last night.”
“Is that what’s bothering you?”
“No, it’s not,” she fumed. “What’s bothering me is he told you about…well…”
She trailed off and Justin understood it was her lack of a job and an apartment she referred to.
“You offered me work out of pity, and when I told Bill exactly what I thought of that, he told me you refused to take no for an answer and would come to the shelter yourself if I didn’t show up here.”
So, it had taken the threat of his tracking her down at the homeless shelter to convince her to come to his house this morning. Justin wasn’t sure how he felt about that. Insulted? No. A little angry? Maybe. Frustrated? Definitely. But he understood how debasing it must feel for someone she considered her enemy to be offering her a job. However, they were no longer enemies, and the sooner she accepted that, the better.
“Come in.” He stepped back. “Mickie is next door playing. She’ll be home in a little while.”
“Sent her off so she wouldn’t see the fireworks?” Sarah replied nastily.
“Yes.”
That one word seemed to deflate Sarah. She let out a long sigh, raked a hand through her hair, then finally walked in. Justin didn’t wait for her but continued to the kitchen, where he had juice and coffee waiting. He poured her both before hooking a kitchen stool with his foot and pulling it out. Slipping onto it, he indicated the one across from him.
He watched Sarah glance around and wondered what she saw. Little had changed since Amy. The kitchen was still a cozy little place for family meetings.
That’s one reason Amy had liked it so much. Modem, with tiles, yellow paint and pale corn-silk flowers on the pastel printed wallpaper, it gave off a feeling of homeyness. A small table for four sat near a picture window that afforded a view of a large backyard and the forest beyond that. The appliances were new, with a small snack bar separating the breakfast area from the actual cooking area.
Did Sarah wonder if he and Amy had eaten their dinner in here or out in the more formal dining room? If they’d had intimate chats in the evening, staring out the window as the sun slowly sank beneath the trees? She was in for a surprise if she thought that.
One of the things Justin truly regretted was there had been none of that. He’d always been too busy to sit down and spend any time with his wife. The melancholy of that inconsideration tried to grab hold of him, but he shook it off. Better to get down to business with Sarah before she decided to get defensive again.
“I need help.”
“I’ve never doubted that.”
He smiled at her quick comeback. “My sitter quit. I can’t find anyone on such short notice and I have to go to the office today. I’m very picky about whom I leave Mickie with. As you might guess, losing a parent is very hard on a child so small. Even though it’s been two years now, Mickie is still not over her mother’s death. She needs stability, someone who can be here for her when I’m not.”
Justin fiddled with his coffee cup, staring into the depths of it before raising his gaze back to her.
“I know being a housekeeper-sitter is way beneath your training, but I have a proposition. I want you to work here—live here, too, as a matter of fact. That way, if any emergencies come up and I have to go out of town, someone will be here. The pay is good, but not as good as you would make as a legal assistant. However, while working here, you would be tree to send out your résumés and seek a better paying position more in keeping with your experience. All I ask is that any interviews be set up at a time when I’m free to be here with Mickie, and that when you do quit, you give me at least a month’s notice so I can find another housekeeper and let Mickie get used to her before you leave.”
Sarah stared at Justin, certain her mouth hung open. In one hand he offered her a job, but only until she could find something else. What did the other hand hold? The hatchet if she blundered? Did he realize how awful his offer sounded? Or had he only been trying to help her and had accidentally made it sound as though he didn’t want her around?
Evidently, she’d voiced her opinions, because Justin responded.
“That’s not the way I meant it. I simply meant you’d be doing me a great favor by helping me out. Look, Sarah, I know we never got along before, but you’re family. Can we at least try—for Mickie’s sake?”
Sarah swallowed. For Mickie’s sake? Well, what did she expect? That Justin would say he had been wrong in the past, wrong because of all the pain he had caused her family? He’d come to them and told them he was sorry for what had happened, had even offered compensation and jobs…and married Amy, too. If that didn’t show he felt remorseful, what did? But she’d never believed it. She’d thought he should pay for everything that had happened and have no happiness. She’d made it her crusade to make his life miserable, and she had succeeded. If rumor could be believed, he and Amy had been having problems. Amy had never said anything to her, but Sarah wondered now if it was because of all the grief she herself had caused him whenever she was around.
Guiltily, Sarah looked away from the deep brown eyes that stared at her with such intensity. She needed to let go of the past. Wasn’t that just the reason she’d come yesterday? Justin was offering to let her look for a job while she worked for him. That was it. Very simple. A way to put the past where it belonged, while proving herself trustworthy.
It galled her, though, to feel that she was taking charity.
As if reading her mind, Justin said quietly, “I’m family, Sarah. Let me help you.”
She swallo
wed her humiliation. She would take the job, but she would make sure that she earned every penny of her pay. “Very well.”
He expelled a great breath. “Fantastic.”
When he named her salary her eyes widened in shock. “You can’t be serious. That’s too much.” Her temper rose again. She didn’t think housekeepers made that in a month and she didn’t like that he thought she was an idiot. After all, how hard could housekeeping and taking care of a child be? She had kept her own house.
“I assure you, Sarah, for cooking, cleaning and taking care of a child, that’s the going rate. If you don’t believe me, you can call Bill.”
Studying him, she decided he was telling the truth. In any event it didn’t matter. She was going to make sure she earned her paycheck, with no room for questions.
“Is it a deal?”
“It’s a deal.”
“Okay. Uh, well, do we need to get clothes, car, anything like that?”
Sarah burned with embarrassment. “Most of my clothes are in a suitcase at the shelter. I do have a few boxes in a storage area that’s paid up through next month.”
Sarah hated that she’d had to admit such a thing to this man. But he hadn’t said anything or given her the slightest reason to think he pitied her. If he had, she would have walked out, despite her desperation for needing the job.
“You can pick them up whenever you’re ready.” He strode over to a door leading to the garage, where he lifted a key off a hook on a piece of wood shaped like a small house. He brought it back to her. “This is to the car. I’ll drive the four-by-four to work—and don’t object. We’re low on groceries. If you have time today, you’ll need to go shopping. Consider free use of my car part of the job.” He opened his wallet and pulled out some money.
Sarah’s eyes widened.
“This is your first month’s salary plus household expenses. The other housekeeper just took the money and as we needed supplies or whatever she paid for them out of an account she’d set up in her own name. There was a box in the office, where she kept all her receipts and stuff. However, if you’d prefer not to have a separate household account, you can buy whatever you feel the house or Mickie needs, then I’ll reimburse you.”
The Best Christmas Ever Page 3