by Chloe Plume
What the hell do I wear?
That question had never really bothered me before. I dug through my drawers, tossing things to one side and the other.
Oh, what about those jeans?
There was a pair of jeans that I hadn’t worn since the whole dark wash only years and since I’d grown enough of a butt that I felt self-conscious about how tightly they stretched across my backside. Of course, now the light wash had ironically come right back into style—at least, according to Nicole, whose expertise in these things I had no reason to question—and maybe, after that dress last night had fit so well…
I grabbed it out of the drawer and found a flowy white top with lace trims and bohemian chic detailing. It took a couple jumps and wiggles, but the jeans slid over my butt and actually looked really great.
Wish I’d tried them on before.
I slipped into some nude pumps and admired the completed look.
Not so shabby Maddy.
Zayde’s friend Alex met us at the entrance of a large building and we walked down towards the basement.
“I can’t believe you wore heels,” Zayde teased as I struggled to walk down the rickety staircase. “Special occasion?”
“Yeah, it’s always a special time Zayde, hanging out with you,” I said, thinking about the time he unknowingly brought me to a strip club for my birthday.
“Yeah, yeah…alright, well, let me help you. A few steps are missing here…”
Alex had left us at the doorway to the old basement. Apparently most of the downstairs had been renovated in 2001 and now housed the World of Wonder archives. But some of the old graffiti, according to Zayde, was left alone, and that’s what he was interested in showing me.
I felt his arm around my waist, steading me in place of the bannister that was long gone.
“This place is the real deal,” Zayde began as we made our way into the underground ruins. “It only stayed open for a year, nineteen-seventy-seven to seventy-eight.”
“A year?” I expressed, wondering what on earth could be so important to music history if it only lasted for a year. Simultaneously, I tried to balance myself on one heeled foot while the other felt for the uneven surface of the next stair, which wasn’t quite where it was supposed to be.
“Yeah, but in that year, you know it was like the birthplace of punk rock in L.A. The Screamers, the Go-Go’s—“
I fell, and of course it was right into Zayde, who easily held me in place with the one arm he had across my lower back.
“—watch out there”
“Thanks.” I felt a tingle as I straightened and then his arm finally loosened as we made it to the solid floor.
“Check this out!” Zayde shouted, clearly excited. He ran over to a large graffiti covered wall against which the World of Wonder archives were stacked in blue-topped clear filing bins. “Everything is Wrong. Evil. X.” He read the large white letters painted over a dark black and purple background chaotically speckled with white paint. “So cool…”
I shrugged. “Yeah, I guess.”
Zayde grinned, looking even hotter in the sparse lighting that highlighted the impossible contours of his face. “You’re not finding this very interesting, are you Maddy?”
I smiled sheepishly. “I mean, I’m just wondering why it’s such a big deal.”
Zayde inspected the symbols painted across the wall. “Well, I mean just think about where we’re standing. The way music was played here and expressed, just the way the performers and audience were all just people crammed into this basement trying to find some kind of meaning in the rage and angst of the day—well, you know the Screamers, you can almost hear them here, singing that line from ‘The Beat Goes On’”:
“‘Pop stars sit in chairs and reminisce/ Kids today are right to make a fist…’”
“Kind of like you, no?” I asked sarcastically.
“Yeah, well, that’s kind of the point.” Zayde shuffled over to a corner of the room where pipes ran exposed just below the peeling concrete. “Isn’t this awesome! Low ceilings, everything out there…Of course after this place closed everything moved over to Whisky A GoGo and the Sunset Strip clubs. The change of venue killed the L.A. punk scene in the 80s. But man! I wish I could have been here back when they filmed that Smashing Pumpkins music video, before the renovations. You know they had a live concert, right here.”
“Really? What song?”
“ ‘Perfect’ in nineteen-ninety-eight. The part at the end has scenes in the old layout of the basement, before the renovations a couple years later.”
“That was here?” I was surprised. “I love that song.”
Zayde smirked. “Of course you do… But there you go. You listed to the Red Hot Chili Peppers?”
“Yeah.”
“The guy that started this club, Brendan Mullen, he gave them their start in eighty-three at Club Lingerie, the place he started after The Masque closed down. You know their album, I’m With You?”
“Sure.”
“Yeah, that song, ‘Brendan’s Death Song,’ well that’s about him. What I’m saying is, this place connects a lot of things that have to do with real, solid music.” Zayde walked back and stood right next to me, looking out over the room. “I would have fucking loved to play in a place like this back in a time like that.”
How the hell does he look so hot?
Introspection took Zayde to a whole new level of sexiness. I was so drawn to him that, when I finally caught myself starting, I had to hurry to diffuse the awkwardness.
“You sound a lot like the whole ‘pop stars reminisce’ thing, Zayde. Not everything worthwhile is in the past, in a different time and place.”
He nodded. “Yeah, maybe.” Then he turned to face me, looking right into my eyes. “I kind of wonder then, is that why you’re doing all this entertainment business stuff, instead of your own thing, because of what happened to your mom and how your dad felt and all of that?”
I froze. Not only was I shocked that Zayde Knight had thought so deeply about the influences and intentions of my life, but I reacted viscerally to how spot on his comment was.
How does he know?
“I mean, there’s things I want to do, but there’s things I have to…”
That’s the best you can do?
Chapter 20
Zayde
She looked so damn hot standing there with her tight jeans and blouse cut low over the soft swell of her breasts. I couldn’t help myself.
It’s now or never.
She raised her green eyes up, meeting my hard stare, and began to say something.
“Zayde, you’re right that I’ve been trying to fix the past by—“
I kissed her. My hands pressed her supple shoulders back against the wall and she let out a sigh as her exposed skin met the cool concrete. At first, her lips tensed with surprise, then they fell back into their pillowy softness. I began to tease the line between them with my tongue, and she opened for me with a light moan.
Fuck, she tastes good.
Her mouth was like strawberries, as clichéd as it sounds. I gently bit her lower lip and she squirmed against the wall. My pants tightened uncomfortably.
There was no need for words. Her body responded, pressing against me, just as I ran my hands up the curve of her waist and under her breasts. Those beautiful, delicious breasts. I cupped the full weight of one and ran my mouth over the enticing contour. It fit so perfectly in my hand. I squeezed and flicked my tongue under the top of her bra to tease her swollen nipple.
This fucking bra has to go.
My hands reached under the loose hem of her top and traced the silky skin of her back, finally settling on the clasp. I only needed one hand, so my other one traveled back down her curves to rest on her juicy ass.
Finally…
Just as she pushed against my leg and I could feel her body wanting it every bit as much as my own…
“HEY! You guys all set?”
Alex. Awesome timing.
I pulled away and Madison slumped. It was abrupt and it was awkward.
“Yeah, sure. Thanks bud.” I called back up the stairs and turned my back to readjust my crotch so things were less obvious.
What a cock block. I’m gonna kill him…
“Alright. Just closing up is all.” He shouted down again.
“Yeah, I get it Alex. Thanks. Be out in a minute.”
I turned to Maddy, who was also readjusting herself and blushing red from embarrassment.
“Uh, listen…” I started, wondering whether I should address the issue or let the tension build. I settled on the latter. Never be the first to break the tension. “I know a great place to eat in Malibu. We can take the drive up the PCH and catch some nice views. You hungry?”
She nodded.
Chapter 21
Madison
Holy crap.
My knees were still shaking. I could tell there was something in the way he looked at me, but I wasn’t ready for what happened next. The way he pushed into me, holding my body in his firm hands as he pressed my back into the wall. The way his mouth devoured my lips, leaving them deliciously sore from the gentle tug of his teeth. The way he handled my breasts, gently but with every intention of claiming them in that moment for himself…
I loved every part of it. My body softened as he hardened against me. I wanted him there, pressed against me, more than anything.
Until it stopped.
Life has its way of ruining everything before it even begins.
My negativity didn’t last long though. The afternoon was beautiful and the curve of the shoreline stretched so beautifully against the backdrop of the mountains. Zayde drove his sports car somewhere around the speed limit for once, and I had time to enjoy the warm breeze and crashing waves as the sun descended towards the far reaches of the Pacific Ocean.
We didn’t talk. I thought he was going to address the obvious host of issues, but he sat there in silence the whole ride up. I didn’t really know what to say, so I kept quiet too.
“You like seafood?” he asked.
I nodded and that was all he said.
When we finally pulled over to a place by the water, the valet pulled opened the doors and greeted us, smiling. “Mr. Zayde. Very nice. Keep it over in the same place?”
We walked in and were immediately seated by the window overlooking the crash and spray of the waves over the rocky coastline.
“You come here a lot?” I asked, attempting to break the ice.
Zayde looked around. The restaurant was rustic chic, like a fisherman’s hangout spruced up for the jet set. The views were fantastic, and from where we sat I could see the entire curve of the coastline and the start of a sunset shining off the glassy surface of the water.
“Yeah, I like it here.”
“I’m surprised no one’s rushed over here,” I noted. “Oh, oh, OMG, Zayde Knight!”—I waved my hands around sarcastically—“I’m going to die, it’s Zayde Knight!”
He laughed, slightly, with a half-smile more like a grin. “Yeah, okay. Well, that’s why I come here. No one cares are much. It’s laid back. Good paparazzi rules,” he added, pointing to a sign that said “No Cameras.”
Suddenly I was aware of a family pointing and motioning at our table from the front of the restaurant. The hostess was shrugging and making outward signs of apology. I turned to Zayde and tilted my head in their direction.
“Let’s go see what’s up,” I suggested.
Zayde looked down. “I already know what’s up. They got screwed. Come on.” He stood up and walked to the front.
“We had this table for the sunset. Two months.”
“I understand. Something fell through. We’d be happy to offer—“
“It’s my daughter’s birthday. Come on, she just graduated—“
“As I said, we’d be happy to offer you something else.”
Zayde interrupted the exchange. “Hey, you guys can have the table.” He turned to me. “That’s okay with you, right?”
I had realized that the reservation only “fell through” the moment we walked in, and I nodded, somewhat embarrassed at having indirectly caused the whole scene.
The hostess whispered in Zayde’s ear but I could still hear her. “That’s very kind of you, Mr. Knight.”
Zayde winced. “Yeah, really kind.”
She seated us at a table with a small window, the view somewhat obscured by the formation of rocks meant to keep erosion at bay.
“So,” I started, “looks like people still do give a damn.”
“Yeah. I’m happy to be left alone, but sometimes I don’t even know when they’ve messed with someone else to give me a token kiss on the ass—sorry.” Zayde opened his menu. “I’ll shut-up. Let’s just eat.”
He buried his head in the menu, and a sweet compelling feeling arose inside me that was more than just attraction, but all the same directed towards him.
I wish we hadn’t been interrupted in that dingy basement that got him so excited.
The way that Zayde had talked about music down in the remains of the Masque finally gave me a glimpse at something deeper inside of him. It was something that often left an abiding nihilistic impression, but once in a while, and only if you could catch it, there was something hopeful and aspiring there beneath layers of choices gone wrong under pressure and the cynicism gone wild in an effort to cope.
He ordered wine and no one bothered to card me or question my drinking it. It tasted much better than the bottles some of the girls at boarding school used to sneak in. The wine immediately rushed through my body, bringing lightness to my head and a tingle through my core. I watched the sky grow darker and the fading light stream across Zayde’s face. He was talking about the wine or food or something, but I was just enjoying this one moment.
Chapter 22
Zayde
Madison didn’t seem to be listening to whatever the hell I was saying. I didn’t blame her. I was trying to fill up the silence between us with small talk about food and drink. Nothing too interesting.
Nothing as interesting as her.
This girl I’d ignored for so many years was turning into my greatest fixation. I wanted her more than anything. And, I also wanted to know everything about her.
“Maddy?” I asked suddenly, breaking away from some dumb commentary I was making on the locally harvested seasonings they used at the restaurant.
She suddenly looked away from the window and towards me again. “Yes?”
“So, what is it that you really want to do?” That was the big question. “You know, with your life.”
She paused, thinking things over, sipping again on the glass of wine in her hands, before returning it to the table and running her long, delicate fingers over the rim of the glass.
“I don’t want to leave my dad alone. But I guess, what I really want is to help people when things go wrong in the world. Help give people a chance…people who wouldn’t even have a chance.”
“Is that because of your mother? I remember reading an article, on how she’d come out of Romania, an orphan, in the streets where so many kids just had no way out.”
She looked straight into my eyes. “I think so.” Then she turned to the window again, watching the sunset colors come into full bloom. “But it’s also just me. Because I can’t live my life just worrying about music videos and photo shoots and publicity.”
I called the waitress over for the check. “I’m like that with this whole bull shit dance music crap.”
Madison smiled as she took another sip of wine. “What’s wrong with dance music?”
“Nothing. Just like there’s nothing wrong with music videos.” I gave my card to the waitress. “But, the whole thing’s not for me, and I don’t think I could live a whole pretend life. That’s all I’m saying.”
Maddy nodded. We watched the sun descend across the horizon and the night finally settled in. The waitress returned with the receipt and I signed it.
“One second,�
� I said, getting up and walking over to our former table.
Suddenly I feel bad about all the other times this probably happened and I didn’t even know about it.
“Excuse me,”—I attempted to get the attention of the family I’d earlier displaced—“just wanted to wish you a happy birthday. Overheard all of that before, which I’m sorry for, by the way.”
The father was nodding and his daughter was hurriedly pulling out her cell phone.
“Can I take a picture?” she asked politely.
I wasn’t used to being asked. We took a quick birthday pic and I shook hands with her parents and little brother and, well, it seemed so damn normal.
I got back to the table and Maddy was smiling. “Well, look at you. Doing something nice for once.”
“Don’t let my momentary lapse of indifference fool you, it was a special occasion.” I glanced at my watch. “Listen. It’s such a beautiful night. You want to come by the beach with me for a second. I got a buddy with a house up here who doesn’t mind me coming through when I want to just chill by the water. It’s a great little place.”
“Sure.” She reached out her hand and I helped her up.
Fuck. What was this girl doing to me?
Chapter 23
Madison
The waves lapped gently against the shore, instead of crashing against jagged rocks as they had at the restaurant. It was a welcome change, especially as the moon was almost full and gleaming over the soft, white sand.
“He’s got a nice place here. Kind of private.”
Zayde had rolled up his jeans and was skipping rocks over the surface of the ocean. He’d thrown his blue jacket over my shoulders since there was a strong breeze rolling out across the beach.
“Yeah,” I agreed, watching him act more down to earth than I ever though possible. “Who is this friend?”
Zayde shrugged and walked back over to where I was sitting on the edge of the dry sand. “Just some industry guy, producer, executive, whatever.”
“So people just kind of do you favors?”
Zayde plunked down in the sand next to me. “Well, they do favors for Zayde Knight, Inc. You know, the business entity. Me…well, I’m not so sure anyone would do any favors for just me.”