by Sherry David
In that moment I knew that Matt had serious issues and the last six months flashed before my eyes. I saw what I should’ve seen months ago that Matt’s unending attention and constant need to be in my presence wasn’t about love it was all about control. Now I just had to figure out how I was going to get out of this apartment since Matt was still holding me down and he easily overpowered me. Just as suddenly as he had hit me Matt began kissing me while murmuring in between how much he loved me. He then began taking off my clothes and started having sex with me like nothing had happened, meanwhile I was crying and in pain. Matt kept repeating that same old line “I’m so sorry baby”. Survival mode kicked in so I started pretending I was into the sex, I figured once we were finished he would go to sleep and I could get out of there. Matt was smart and it wasn’t easy to convince him that I was into the sex so to test me he asked me for oral sex. I could’ve won an award because on my knees I gave him what was probably the best oral sex I had ever given him then he laid me back on the floor and fucked me desperately as if he could fuck away what he had just done to me. Despite the circumstances, I involuntarily had an orgasm. Although I knew it was merely a physiological response I was very upset with myself for having an orgasm. Finally Matt came and then he lay down beside me and started to fall asleep but he wouldn’t let go of my hand. I’m lying there trying to think how was I going to get out of there when I finally heard him start snoring. Slowly, I slipped my hand out of his, put on my clothes and quietly got out of the house. I drove straight to the police station and followed them back to my house where they arrested Matt’s crazy ass. I can’t believe he was still there, sleeping nonetheless.
Despite a restraining order against him, when Matt was released on bail he promptly began to stalk me. I ended up moving out of that apartment due to what happened there and now lived closer to some of my relatives just in case I had more problems with Matt and I certainly did. I had gotten a new job where I didn’t get home until around 12am and when I arrived Matt would come walking out of the bushes begging me to take him back. The situation was made worse due to the fact that Matt and I had found out we were having a baby about a week before he attacked me. Eventually, Matt was arrested again for violating the restraining order since he wouldn’t stop showing up at my place he ended up going to jail for a year. While in jail he still tried to reach out to me through other people. I made the decision to terminate my pregnancy because I didn’t want any ties to Matt that would mean having to deal with him after he got out of jail. That was my first pregnancy and the decision I made was a hard one but I never regretted it since I didn’t want a child born into that turmoil and I couldn’t imagine how I would raise this child while having to deal with such a horrible father. Relationship number 3 was now officially over and although it was my shortest relationship it definitely had had the most negative and long term impact on me.
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Chapter 5 One True Love?
Who would have ever imagined that a mere seven months after my boyfriend tried to kill me I would embark on the happiest relationship of my life. It started with a chance encounter with an old friend that made me question whether we truly get second chances in this life. You see during school I had never admitted any interest in Mark despite the fact that he made me feel as special as I had been raised to believe I was. In high school Mark had entirely too many options, so during the one or two times he flirted with me I had simply ignored him. With more than half the female population of the high school after him, Mark had unlimited options when it came to having a girlfriend. Basically, I cheated myself because although Mark had many options, I may have been his choice but I never even gave Mark the choice to make. Despite his numerous attempts at flirting with me, I would decide he was just playing and act completely uninterested. There was no pretending to be uninterested that day in the store because I lit up as soon as he flashed me that gorgeous smile. I knew I’d made the wrong decision 10 years ago by selling myself short. Well there’s nothing like life to correct bad decisions. My theory is that if you have life you have the opportunity to make good decisions that will make up for prior bad ones and so here we are, me and Mr. Mark Faison. That day at the store Mark asked me if he could get my number and if maybe we can hang out sometime. Of course I eagerly said yes and gave him my number. We discussed our classmates and how a lot of them weren’t looking so hot to only be between the age of 24 and 26. Finally, we stopped talking and realized about an hour had passed by. That hour had gone by quickly since both Mark and I were big talkers especially when talking to each other. We both somehow managed to drag ourselves away from the store but just like he said he would Mark called me that night and we talked nonstop for over 4 hours.
The next day I drove to my hairdresser who had built herself a shop that attached to her house. I walked in and Stacy began to do my hair. A few minutes later I felt a man’s hands washing my hair and by the time I sat up I saw it was no other than Mark. We both laughed, it turned out my hairdresser was Mark’s younger sister who had taken cosmetology and gotten her license from the same high school Mark and I had attended. Mark then asked me if we could hang out later that night, it was perfect for me since I was getting a fresh hairdo anyway. Mark stated he wanted to go to downtown Raleigh where they have quite a few little clubs and bars up and down the main street. Additionally, you could walk around and look at art in the small galleries and if it was your thing you could even get a piercing or tattoo 24 hours a day.
This date was a perfect way to reconnect since we spent the whole night walking around and talking. At one point we stopped at one of the local eateries and spent that time catching up. The funny thing was that being with Mark instantly brought out the little girl in me again. I felt vulnerable and yet free to share everything about the last 7 years of my life with Mark. Likewise Mark told me all about his tour in the Gulf, his quick marriage due to the loneliness that comes with being in the military and then his inevitable divorce. While looking in his eyes I saw all the unspoken hurt he had endured and felt that I might be able to return the favor he once gave me by helping him settle back into his life. I spent that thanksgiving with him and his family, since both my parents were deceased. Mark’s family took to me right away and started calling me their daughter. Stacy, Mark’s sister started styling my hair free of charge saying how could she charge her sister n law. His whole family constantly told me how good I was for him and how much he had changed in the few months since we started dating. Our relationship was truly like a fairytale where lil old me ended up with the boy every girl had wanted in high school and there was no question that he wanted me. To be honest, Mark could have been interested in me during high school but I let my own insecurities keep me from pursuing anything more than friendship with him.
Almost a month had passed, and the sexual tension between Mark and I was about to cause spontaneous combustion within me. One night I tried to encourage him towards the bedroom but he re-steered me back to the living room. Once again it would be a night of kissing and touching leaving me unfulfilled and craving so much more. Mark told me that he loved me that night and stated he would never want to do anything that would hurt me or adversely affect our rekindled friendship. Suddenly I was confused, “Are you trying to say you only see me as friend?” Mark bent down and began biting my left nipple through my shirt and bra and questioned ” Do you think I do this with all my friends?” He moved like a gorgeous, very sleek snake and every part of me that he touched felt like it had been bit and was now on fire. I guess Mark’s experience was working out to my favor because somehow he managed to take both of our clothes off in less than 5 seconds. “You obviously have a lot of experience at this Mr. Faison!” I said while keeping my hands around his waist. I stepped back to appreciate the Adonis standing before me. It was like Mark was cut from an exquisite stone and the crafters took time around the abs to show the intricate detail and “My God” when he turned around his butt was perfection. A perfect butt on a man is
a hard thing because it’s easy for them to have too much and worse yet a combination of butt and hips. Well I didn’t have to worry about that, Mark had a perfect butt that you could bounce anything off, seriously he could have been a top notch stripper. That was only the beginning, I looked down and saw that his other head was on active duty ready to go to battle. This would be a battle I didn’t mind losing, I just wanted to make sure the victory wasn’t too easy, I was prepared to go several rounds with him. I was startled out of my daydream by what felt like molten lava brewing between my legs. In one action Mark had pushed me against the wall and was on his knees. “Uh what are you doing to me?” I could barely get the words out. Mark looked up at me laughing coyly and said “Vanessa if you don’t know what I’m doing then I’ll be teaching you an awful lot tonight. I just hope your heart can handle it.” I simply replied “Yes Sir”. Mark had managed to get down between my legs while holding both my hips as I stood over him. His head was tilted up like he was going to try to catch something. This angle made his mouth line up perfectly with my crotch as he looked up. Worse yet, he pushed me back towards the wall and using his hands he pulled my lower half onto his face. I was losing my mind, I couldn’t even catch my breath “Mark, Mark ooohhhh Mark!” Moaning was all I could do at this point since I couldn’t think long enough to form any kind of sentence.
This situation was actually hitting all my needs it was satisfying the inner voyeur in me since I felt someone could walk by the open window any moment and see us. Secondly, Mark was some kind of venicunnilingist who could make She (that’s what I call my wonderful little mound) stop being so shy and open up fully to him. Last but certainly not least the way Mark was positioned in relation to She made sure that there was constant pressure which just pushed me over and over the edge again and again. She was loving it, no one had ever truly made her go crazy like this from oral sex. I exploded multiple times before Mark decided to come up for air in fact his tongue had found my little woman in the boat and convinced her to come out and play awhile. Mark was turned on by this himself since he couldn’t believe the response he was generating in my body. “Vanessa, I’ve been counting and you’ve already come 3 times, is that normal for you?” Now what do I say to that? I am multi-orgasmic when it’s good to me but Mark doesn’t want to hear that he wants the credit for himself. “No in fact, it’s usually very hard for me to have a real orgasm through oral sex.” Mark just laughed “Not anymore, I will make sure of that”.
When Mark went to stand up this time I started to bend down but Mark stopped me and just started kissing me while pressing me hard against the wall. Since he still had his hands around my hips he just lifted one of my legs up and went inside of me. I was sooo excited I was shaking as he delved deeper inside of me. Mark started slowly saying he didn’t want to hurt me in that position and was I ok. I answered him by grabbing the edge of the wall where it curved so that I could get better balance then I started throwing it back to him as hard as I possibly could. All caution went out the window, we were like two animals afraid that if his penis came out everything would end yet at the same time desperate to get all that each of us had to give. Once I had cum again Mark pressed as close as he possibly could into me and gave me two more grinding thrusts before releasing a low animal-like moan. As we fell to the floor Mark stared at my face and told me he loved me and he thinks he always had. Being the nympho I was once we were on the floor I immediately tried to return Mark’s oral favor. Besides his penis was gorgeous as if he had custom ordered it himself. Mark immediately stopped me before I could pop that cute little head into my mouth and although I questioned why it wasn’t worth discussing it in this moment.
I didn’t know how to act, I finally had what I wanted most, a good relationship with a man that I loved and with whom I shared intense sexual passion. The other three relationships were always missing something, but now I had it all. My first love Lou let his passion for drugs supersede our relationship so although sex was great between us, with him us would always involve another woman. Then there was poor Stanley, as my second relationship he had a lot to live up to but we lacked the sexual chemistry I’d had with Lou and most importantly I just didn’t love him. Then there was Matt. With Matt I let sexual energy be the basis of the relationship and I was so blinded by it early on that I didn’t notice I was dealing with a crazy man. I literally almost let sex be the death of me with that one. So I’ll say in my case it was like three strikes brought me the home run I needed and Mark was my game winning ball which I planned to keep and cherish .
Mark was definitely the complete package, he had a decent job, he was smart, sexy as hell and he pursued me. I have to say the pursuing part because I think that’s the common denominator in all my relationships, I only wanted a man who truly wanted me and who would do whatever it took to have me. Lou cheated and was generally no good but he always wanted me and would do the craziest things to get my attention or get me back. Stanley loved me and decided he wanted me early in our relationship and was willing to do whatever it took to get me down the aisle. Finally, there was Matt and although he turned out to be completely crazy, I was initially drawn in by the fact that he was so into me and made that clear from the beginning. Thank God I grew up with a father who regularly told me how special and wonderful I was. Belief that I was special made it impossible for me to ever stay with any man that put his hands on me no matter how many times he told me he loved me afterwards.
My relationship with Matt had really taken a toll on me, I was no longer expecting that happy ending where I would meet the man with whom I could spend the rest of my life with. Mark was really a sweet surprise since I wasn’t looking for him or anyone else at that point. Further, if Mark and I hadn’t shared such a sweet friendship as kids, I don’t think I would have even responded to his flirtation. My sexual birth had begun in love but it grew into its own entity, I loved sex and each man I had been with would often refer to my very healthy appetite for sex. In fact Mark would often tell me that the only days we didn’t have sex in a given month were the days when I was menstruating.
Prior to getting with Mark I would have settled on having a man I could basically get along with and who shared my sexual hunger. I really thought that would be enough but once again I was so WRONG. Now with Mark I had a man who shared my very healthy sex drive, we could talk about anything together, we had a mutual physical attraction to each other and dare I say it, I Loved Mark.
For the next two years Mark supported me in anything I tried to do and for the first time I had a partner that could truly reciprocate the kind of love I was giving. Due to the conflict in our work hours Mark would often leave my place around 4:30am to be to work at 5am. Seeing how most nights we had sex before going to sleep, I would be sleeping when Mark left for work. One morning around 3:30am Mark awoke me, I turned over to go back to sleep thinking he was just getting ready for work. The next thing I knew he was kissing my back and my buttocks and I went from sleep to game on in 5 seconds. I turned over and positioned my head next to his right upper thigh as he stroked my very ample behind. Before he could protest I had the head of his beautiful pink and brown penis in my mouth. You see Mark was constantly stopping me from performing oral sex on him, so I had finally questioned him about it. “I just don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to do” he said. “You take care of every sexual need I have don’t you realize that I would feel better knowing I was doing the same for you” He just laid down and let me continue then before I knew what was happening he had flipped me around so that She was sitting on his face and I was still able to enjoy his medicine stick. I had often read about doing a 69 but this was my first time actually doing it. I prefer to let each person enjoy their moment when attention is focused on them solely. I still think it’s better that way, but certainly getting head from Mark is good no matter how it’s done. While sucking Mark’s delicious penis I made sure to keep two fingers right there in the little space between where his scrotum stopped and his a
nus begun. Continued massaging of this area along with the varied intensity with which I sucked his cock resulted in Mark showering me with his full load. I was extremely happy at his response but he looked at me like a kid that had done something wrong. “I’m so sorry I hope I didn’t get it all over you”. I just started laughing and told him “You did exactly what you were supposed to do, any less and I would not have thought I’d done a good job.” A very sly smile appeared across Mark’s face, then he lifted my legs up to his shoulders and started fucking me like there was no tomorrow. Mark was on his knees in the bed and as he looked down he stated “Do you have any idea how much you’re turning me on right now? “No, how am I turning you on?” Mark then stated “You are so beautiful and the harder I fuck you the more your gorgeous breasts shake and it’s driving me crazy.” Twenty minutes later we had both collapsed onto the bed and when I awoke Mark had left me a cute little note on the pillow that read “I’m already missing you”. During the course of our two years Mark constantly found little ways to let me know how much he loved me.
So back to the present day, I am now driving Mark towards his parents place and he is still just sitting there silent. Is this the same man who shares everything with me, the man who constantly reminds me of his love and most importantly the man who loves me too much to just leave me out here dangling like this, with no clue what’s going on. Not ready to just give up I ask Mark “What happened how did you get into the accident?” Now Mark just looks at me not saying anything, then finally he says “I should have called someone else I knew you would ask way too many questions.” What the hell, I cannot believe he just tried to switch all of this crazy around and make it about me instead of him. I just looked at him, expecting he would apologize for that stupid remark he’d just made, but he didn’t say anything. When we appeared outside his parents’ house I was shocked to see police officers there. I was so scared as I got out of my car, I walked up to where two officers were talking to Mark’s parents I noticed Mark wasn’t beside me. Somehow he had gotten out of my car and gone around the house so that he would avoid the police. One of the officer’s asked me who I was, I stated I was Mark’s girlfriend, they then asked if I knew where Mark was, I stated no. Mark’s mother was giving me the most evil look she could manage and I was just totally lost. The officer went on to tell me that they had found Mr. and Mrs.’ Faison’s car and it had been in an accident. They asked me if I knew anything about it. Once again I replied No. The officer then warned me about failing to cooperate and how I could be an accessory after the fact. “Accessory to what?” I questioned. The other officer then stated that Mark’s car had hit another car with a woman and her two children in it and one of the kids was killed immediately. “Oh My God”, I felt like I was going to pass out as if someone had just kicked by legs from under me. I went and sat in one of the outside chairs. All the while Mark’s mother was looking at me like I was the enemy. The officer then asked me if I knew anything about Mr. and Mrs. Faison’s stolen car, I replied no. They then questioned if I was used to seeing Mark driving that vehicle, and I had to say “Yes”. Mark’s mother became very upset and stated I was lying and that Mark didn’t drive that car. It was all finally hitting me Mark had been driving under the influence and had caused the death of a child and now his parents were covering up for him and wanted me to do the same. I then walked to my car and told them I had to go home, the officers advised me to stay in the area since they would have more questions for me. While I was driving home, I kept trying Mark’s number but he never answered, finally I called his sister Stacy. When Stacy answered she just said she was so sorry I was involved in this mess. With her next 4 words Stacy managed to turn my fairytale relationship into a horrible nightmare. “Mark is an Alcoholic”, “Vanessa did you hear what I said?” yelled Stacy. “Yes, I heard you but that can’t be true, we spend so much of our time together I would know if he were getting drunk regularly.” Stacy went on to tell me that’s why everyone loved Mark and me as a couple because Mark had slowed down on his drinking and didn’t get drunk every day the way he used to. She went on to say “Mark still drinks a lot everyday he just stops now before becoming a drunken fool and that’s only so that you won’t notice” Stacy then told me how this was the third vehicle she knew of Mark destroying due to his drinking. “Well this time it’s much worse he killed a child!” Stacy just started crying uncontrollably, I told her it would be ok and that it wasn’t her fault. She proceeded to say it was partially her fault but the biggest culprits were her parents because they refused to accept that Mark had a problem and they were always trying to fix any mess he got himself into.