by C. M. Owens
Chapter 14
KARA
“I’m just trying to be a polite host. My version of hospitality is a little more fucked up than it used to be. Pardon the extra damage, but you’ve been gone a while,” he tells me almost absently. His gaze dips to the cradle of my barely-clad thighs before he adds, “And you’ve been incredibly insensitive toward my damage every time you refuse to wear shorts. It’s only fair.”
Those intense eyes come back up to meet mine, and it’s like I’m a stupid teenager all over again. His lips curve into that knowing grin, like he enjoys taunting me with all my old weaknesses, while extorting some new ones I’ve picked up along the way.
The vibrator starts buzzing in his hand when he cuts it on, and I feel the annoying, empty clenching going on inside me, desperate for that release.
“I’ll start wearing shorts to bed,” I say very weakly before clearing my throat.
He cocks his head to the side, teasing the inside of my foot with the tickling vibrations made by the little purple wonder. A jolt of excitement shoots up my leg, and I hiss out a breath as my back arches off the bed.
I really do need daily release to keep myself under control, damn it.
He knows that.
He’s been watching me.
He’s been studying me.
Now I know why.
The fucker has been playing me, and he’s been playing me damn well.
“What’s your agenda?” I ask him as he gingerly trails the vibrator up to my knee, which has me closing my legs a lot tighter.
“Give you a little release while I take things in hand,” he murmurs, eyes riveted to my body as it trembles. “I’m as fucked up as you are, and you know it. The least you can do is let me enjoy having you as my captive.”
“You make it sound like I owe you something, when I distinctly remember you choosing the club over me. We were just a couple of fucked-up kids, Rush. Let it go,” I tell him, lacking the conviction my tone should have in a moment like this.
When my hips arch involuntarily, he smirks, his look turning dark as he cocks an eyebrow at me.
“I remember how it went down,” he says so calmly. “Spread your fucking legs.”
Those two sentences don’t go well together. I shake my head in refusal, and he wrenches my legs apart. Memories flutter to the forefront of my mind, remembering all the role-playing we once did when he was searching out his own control to keep from spiraling.
I gave him too much control over me as a result, and I liked it way too much.
I was a stupid kid back then. I’m a stupid woman right now, because my breath comes out in a shudder, and I find myself moving more toward compliance than rejection.
“Don’t fuck me,” I warn him as he starts dragging the vibrator up my inner thigh, teasing me with what he knows I need after the shit day I’ve had.
“I don’t plan to,” he murmurs as he leans down so fast that I don’t have time to prepare.
He shoves my shirt up with his free hand, and I suck in a sharp breath as his lips drag over my stomach. His shudder matches my own.
There’s a reason the damaged always seek out their own version of romance. It feels freeing when someone gets you and doesn’t judge you for the way you handle your shit.
With me, Rush was the only freedom I ever got, until I ran away. With him, I was the freedom from his incredibly screwed-up, dark past, because I didn’t pity him—I was the first who understood his damage.
He shoves my legs farther apart, because his shoulders have broadened since the last time we were in this position. I shut my eyes and let my head fall back, refusing to think too much, because I’m weak as hell and need my damaged ends to fuse back together for a while. They’re too frayed for me to continue on without some sort of mental bandage to help me along...
Self-destruction, here I come.
I give up the pretenses of not needing this as much as he apparently does, and I arch my hips, giving him room to drag my damp underwear down my legs.
The vibrator immediately finds the spot I need it the most, and I cry out a little in surprise, as the powerful rush of adrenaline seizes the rest of my breath from my overwhelmed lungs.
My eyes fly open to find Rush staring down at me with a hooded, hungry gaze as he continues to work my vibrator like he once did when we were teens.
He leans down, and for a second, I’m convinced he’s going to kiss me, but his mouth moves to my ear as the pressure of his body teases mine with so much skin contact.
The orgasm crashes through me so abruptly that it steals the thunder of a build-up, and it almost hurts when he doesn’t stop. He inhales me like he’s breathing me in, as the sensitive tingles leave, preparing for a second orgasm that is definitely on its way to already building.
Especially when he clamps a hand over my mouth, reminding me of when we were young and dumb and working things out the only way we knew how to.
“Admit you’ve fucking missed me,” he whispers near my ear. “Because you’d have already kneed me in the balls by now if you felt any differently.”
It’s hard to say anything with a hand over my mouth, so at least that takes the pressure off from me blabbing just how much I’ve worked on not missing him.
My legs move of their own accord, sliding against the abrasive material of his jeans as I try to drag him closer.
He groans against me when I cry out into his unrelenting hand, my eyes screwing shut with the second, more powerful orgasm that crashes through me with the force of an angry stampede.
He jerks the vibrator away as I emptily clench around nothing, and the chill settles into me...until I feel his mouth replacing the vibrator. My eyes dart open again, and the soft strands of his hair tease my thighs as he begins working me toward my third orgasm of the night.
He’s a hell of a lot better at this than he used to be, and that actually pisses me off, stealing some of the mood of the moment as he does damn good work.
My anger flees quickly, because his cold eyes find mine, as he roughly tugs my legs apart even farther, before dragging them to be atop his shoulders, giving them room to come closer together and only intensifying each sensation.
Fuck’s sake.
I’m going to shatter this time.
Thunder crackles outside just as I whimper, and he actually growls against me as he gets more vicious. It’s like he’s demanding my next orgasm instead of coaxing it out of me.
It’s almost painful when he wins the war, because as I suspected, this one almost wrecks me. My entire body tenses as the sensations topple over me, one right after another. And he drags it out until I’m whimpering in pain instead of pleasure.
Abruptly, he tears his mouth away, and I’m flipped to my stomach in the next instant.
“Fuck me,” I whisper before I can stop myself.
The binds on my wrist cross with the new position, pushing my hands closer together, and allowing me to lift up on my elbows as I push back against him.
I feel the jeans grating against my ass as he lifts me up to my knees. I track his movements with my other senses instead of sight, feeling his hand move between us as the sound of his jeans being undone resonates in my ears, right alongside my pounding heartbeat.
My breath hitches when I feel another more matured part of his body prodding my entrance, slipping easily through the arousal. Just as I think he’s about to capitalize on my whispered, desperate demand, he shoves my legs together.
His legs move to be on either side of my hips, as he starts thrusting between my legs, leaning over me as his hand slides into my hair and roughly tugs my head to the side. The movements ignite a lot of frustration in me, because I’ve never wanted sex so much in my life, and he’s denying it just because he has the control, while simulating the sensations for himself.
His other hand shoves under my shirt as he grabs onto my left breast as an anchor, using it to control my movements against him, and his dick continues moving between my thighs as he uses me f
or his release.
I wish I didn’t want him so much right now, but I’d forgotten what it was like to be at the mercy of Rush.
I overestimated my self-control around him.
He buries his face against my neck just as his loud groan vibrates against my throat. His body stills against me, and I feel something wet hitting my chest. That’s why the bastard lifted my shirt. That’s why I’m at this angle.
I try to be angry, but all I feel is denied something I really want far more than what a healthy, normal person should want.
A shuddered breath follows his quiet groan, and he relaxes against me as we stay quietly in our positions for long enough to catch our breath. I was also denied my fourth orgasm of the night, and I know it’s greedy to be upset about that.
He nips my ear suddenly, and I feel him slide between my thighs as he pulls off me and leaves a bereft sensation in his wake.
The bed jostles, and I glance over my shoulder to see him tucking himself back into his jeans before I can even glimpse the part of his body that just saturated the inside of my shirt and my chest...and a little bit of my stomach and neck...
Sheesh. How long has it been for him?
I lose interest in everything when I hear the damn shower running and the bathroom door shutting.
Are you fucking kidding me right now? He’s taking a shower while I’m stuck in this position with him still running down to my neck?
I try to lift up, only to lose my balance and land hard on my chest, which...makes a bigger mess. Groaning, I move to my back, and feel it...running down my sides.
“Son of a bitch,” I mutter, glaring at the bathroom before I glance up to see I fell in the wrong direction, and the ties are twisted above my head now.
“Just freaking great—”
I stop talking to myself when the door to the bathroom opens, and Rush steps out, running a wet rag all over his face. He arches an eyebrow at me, lifts his gaze to my tangled wrists, and then drops his eyes to where my shirt is pressed against me in telling ways.
“Since you were good, I’ll let you sleep without the restraints tonight,” the smug prick says with twitching lips. “After you shower, of course.”
I want to slap him so hard right now.
He acts like he finds my glare cute or something, because he looks entirely too amused as he comes to free my hands.
It takes more work, given all the tangling, but he finally manages to get it all undone.
He leans down just as I get my wrists untangled, and he inhales against the side of my head again, breathing me in the weird way he always has. I ignore it and pretend that I’m indifferent to the familiar quirk, as he slides his hand down my thigh.
“If you want to sleep without restraints, now you know the price,” he murmurs against my cheek.
My eyes flick to his as he starts pulling back, and he winks at me as that sinister smirk of his deepens. He’s enjoying this too much.
“Enjoy the shower. The temp is exactly right,” he randomly adds as he drops to his back and shuts his eyes like it’s bedtime now that he’s gotten his.
My eyes flick over the tattoos I traced while he was passed out drunk and bleeding. When he cracks open an eye and catches my staring, I jerk my gaze away and try to pretend that I don’t feel like an idiot with no pants or panties covering my bare ass, while my saturated-in-the-front T-shirt sticks to my chest and stomach.
I’m not going to have an ounce of dignity as long as he has control.
I’m being punished.
The dick really does think I wronged him.
“Unbelievable,” I mutter as I slam the door to the bathroom.
I blame the past, my damage and the adrenaline for the fact that I still crave more of him. He won’t get another ounce of compliance from here on out.
He wants complete control over me.
I just don’t know why.
Chapter 15
RUSH
“So your sister is off-limits, I’m assuming,” Darren says to Drex, while one of his best friends continues to fight for his life two days after he was shot up.
I cast a dubious look in the fool’s direction. Even I wouldn’t be that fucking careless right now. Well, at least not verbally, that is.
I smirk, thinking back to yesterday when she actively avoided meeting my eyes, yet stared at me every single time my head was turned.
“You think now is the time to ask if you can hit on my motherfucking sister?” Drex snaps.
Axle quickly grabs Drex by the arm, ripping him back before the crazed lunatic prez cracks Darren’s skull open just for being an idiot.
Snake studies the same bullet he’s been studying for the past hour like it’s a distracting gem. That fucker just keeps getting crazier. I didn’t realize how sane the psychotic ex-girlfriend kept him.
I find myself casting more and more worrisome glances his way, because he’s seriously creeping me the hell right out.
That says something.
Maya is roller skating across the floor while spray-painting a map of the city on the vacant wall.
“Shit show,” I mutter under my breath.
At least under Herrin’s reign, we knew what fucked-up level the shit was going to reach. With Drex in “control,” there is nothing but more and more unpredictable chaos these days.
“Right. Sorry, Prez,” Darren says while quickly lowering his eyes.
The wild, murderous glare in Drex’s leaves in an instant, and he quickly calms himself. I don’t even have to glance behind me to know that Eve is coming down the stairs.
She’s the only one who has that effect on him.
I remember when she was getting attacked pretty damn regularly in this place. Now the guys part like a motherfucking sea for her to walk through.
Just a motherfucking girl from the suburbs.
It’s a brave new world.
I glance up to my room, noticing Kara poke her head back in and shut the damn door the second I catch her spying. I keep my features schooled, resisting the urge to smile.
Maya is staring at me with unabashed studiousness, and her gaze flicks to my room briefly before returning her attention to her pathetic painting.
Sledge makes a frustrated sound from beside me as he pinches the bridge of his nose. The room dissolves into idle chitchat as Drex goes to lift Eve from the ground and start carrying her back up the stairs.
He’ll be gone a while.
I notice Axle slipping his arms around Maya’s middle, as she tries to fish for compliments on her shitty mock-up of Halo.
“We’re all going to get gutted alive, aren’t we?” I muse as I turn my beer up.
“Most likely,” Sledge says on a tired breath. “I remember when I thought it was a good idea to enlist you in this club. Sorry about that. In my head, I was doing you a favor, because I honestly thought this place was better for you than the streets.”
My gaze flicks back up to my room, and I take another long drag off my beer.
“Trust me when I say you made the right call,” I tell him absently, my attention mostly focused on the door as it cracks open.
Kara shuts it again when her eyes collide with mine. She’s gotten ridiculously soft in her time away.
“You’re going to get yourself stabbed in your sleep if you fuck with her head too much,” Sledge cautions. “Remember that she’s a Caine. You always struggled to understand just how fucked up those two really are.”
He gestures toward Drex as he shoves his hand up Eve’s skirt, seconds before he disappears into his room and kicks the door shut.
“Kara’s fear prevents her from turning into Drex, and her drive toward normalcy prevents her from ever following in Herrin’s footsteps,” I tell him with a shrug as I grin around the rim of the beer.
I glance back to my room, just as my door quickly shuts again.
“She’s too curious by nature. She can’t help herself, because her paranoia has her seeking out answers at every single turn,” I go
on. “It leaves her vulnerable to me.”
When I look back and catch him giving me a dry look, I lose the smile and flatten my lips to a thin, expressionless line.
“I worry about just how fucked up your head really is,” he deadpans.
This coming from the guy who had a hand in killing his old lady after her betrayal and has shown zero emotion about it.
“No worse than the rest of you,” I answer.
He clinks his beer against mine before muttering, “Touché.”
We both drink to that.
Kara finally gives up the endeavor to spy in secrecy, because I look back to spot her walking across the high-rise catwalk toward the stairs.
“You’re letting her roam around freely?” Sledge muses.
I scrub a hand over my jaw, keeping myself from smiling. “No. She’s showing her defiance right now. I’ll punish her for it later,” I tell him as my smile finally starts to form.
“I’m sure she’ll love that,” Sledge grumbles like I’m an idiot.
I turn my beer up as she stalks toward us, ignoring the many eyes trying to assess the infamous, elusive Kara Caine. Most of the guys had never met her and have no idea what to think of her.
But she managed to escape Herrin Caine and lie low all these years while avoiding discovery from the man no one else has ever escaped.
More importantly, they have no idea what to think about Drex turning over control of her to me.
It was my one stipulation to Drex in order to keep me in the club after the mafia shit stirred up.
“She doesn’t know it yet, but she’ll never get to walk away from me again,” is all I say to Sledge as I stand and head toward her.
I hear him cursing under his breath, but I ignore his concerns. Kara Caine has gotten soft. I’m going to enjoy that as much as any man like me would.
After all, she’s my one and only true weakness. It’s only natural I keep her close.