Tender Trust

by Tanya Stowe

  She felt the same way even after Alex was taken from her the first time. But the second time, when the months stretched on and he never returned, her hopes and dreams of a normal life died.

  She was Penny Layton, daughter of a prostitute. Unacceptable. Unworthy. If her own mother didn’t care enough to pay attention to her, why would God? Why would He think of her or make plans for her? Why would He send Alex back to her?

  Penny’s thoughts skittered to a halt. When she didn’t think of Alex as an intrusion, she began to accept the miracle of his return. Against all probabilities and odds, Alex had found her. If that was not God’s hand, what was?

  But even before Alex returned to her there had been other blessings. When she wanted to die from grief, Lexie was born and gave her a reason to go on.

  There had always been food and a roof over their heads, even in the worst of times.

  When she needed help in her first saloon, Jann and Inga came into her life.

  When she needed a friend, Jewel showed up on her doorstep.

  At every important juncture of her life, what she needed had appeared.

  Was it possible God’s hand had been in all those events? Was it true that He knew every hair on her head and made provisions for her like the lilies in the field?

  After a lifetime of unworthiness, it was hard for her to believe, let alone accept.

  The priest said the last prayer, and the large crowd of mourners moved away from the grave, headed towards the small Spinetti home.

  Penny and Jewel led the children out through tall snow piled on each side of the cemetery path.

  Lexie broke the awkward silence. “Mommy, how did they dig that big hole when the ground is so hard and frozen?”

  Leave it to her daughter to ask a difficult question.

  “They build a fire and let it smolder. The ground unfreezes and then they can dig.” She was anxious to prevent her daughter from asking more difficult questions in front of the Spinetti children. “Let’s hurry. It’s too cold outside.”

  People waited at the door of the Spinetti house to pay their respects. Inside was crowded with mourners, so Jewel and Penny situated the children next to their mother and decided to leave.

  Gina was reluctant to let go of Alex, and Angelo asked Jann to stay.

  So Jewel, Penny, Inga, and Lexie walked back to the saloon alone, their mood quiet and somber.

  Tom had left the service early, and now, half a block away from the saloon, the sound of his piano music echoed down the near-empty street. The tune rang out sweet and clear in the cold, crisp air.

  Then suddenly, sour notes destroyed the sound. There was a loud discordant bang of keys.

  Tom slammed out of the saloon door. He paused when he saw them, his features pale and taut. Then he spun and without a word, stalked off.

  Jewel stood in the open door, watching his retreat.

  Penny hurried inside, anxious to get Lexie out of the cold air.

  As they began to unfold their scarves, Lexie sighed. “Mister Tom is so sad all the time. Maybe you should take him to church, Aunt Jewel. Church always makes me feel better.”

  Jewel stepped in and quietly closed the door. When she looked up, Penny could see the glint of tears in her friend’s eyes.

  “I don’t think Tom and I would fit in at church very well, honey.”

  Jewel’s words echoed Penny’s feelings so closely, her own eyes filled with tears.

  “Oh yes, you would. My papa says God welcomes everybody in His church.”

  At first, Penny smiled at Lexie’s innocence. Then the truth of her words penetrated Penny’s heart.

  Everybody. Her. Jewel and Tom. All the lost and the hopeless. The unworthy. There was room for everyone in God’s house.

  She caught her breath. Was this one more thing she refused to try because she was afraid?

  Because she felt so good about helping Gina Spinetti, because she was still filled with that warm glow, she grasped Jewel’s hands. “Maybe she’s right. Maybe it’s exactly where we should be.”

  “I don’t think that’s such a good idea.” Jewel hesitated.

  “Maybe not, but you told me you would do anything to help Tom. Did you mean it?”

  Jewel looked out the window, searching for Tom’s retreating figure. “Do you really think…”

  “I don’t know. But what do we have to lose?”

  “All right. Let’s do it.”

  Penny pushed her towards the door. “Go find him. Tell him all of us sinners have an appointment at the church tonight.”

  “You’re going too, Mommy?” Lexie jumped up and down.

  “Yes, baby, I’m going, too!”

  ****

  Alex and Jann came home to a dark building. The front door was locked and the shades drawn. Puzzled, they jogged around to the unlocked back door and hurried inside.

  A large kettle of Inga’s homemade chicken noodle soup sat on the back of the cast iron stove to keep warm.

  Jann and Alex had been so busy with their friends’ needs, neither of them had eaten since breakfast.

  Alex dished out bowls of hot soup for the two of them.

  They ate without a word.

  With something hearty in his stomach, Alex was better able to face the prospect of a long night behind the bar. But he was a bit concerned about his missing family.

  “Well, customers will be here soon. We’d better get ready for them,” he told Jann.

  He unlocked the front door and lit the wall lamps. Jann took the chairs off the tables.

  Alex had just started to wipe down the bar when Lexie burst through the door and skipped across the room.

  “Hi, Papa! We missed you at church tonight. Mommy says it’s all right, though. She said you were doing God’s work by helping Mrs. Spinetti.”

  Church? God’s work?

  Alex froze in stunned silence as Penny, Jewel, Tom, and Inga walked in and shook freshly fallen snow from their coats.

  “And guess what?” Lexie didn’t give him time to absorb the information.

  “I can’t imagine,” he murmured, still stunned. His subtle tone went completely over Lexie’s head.

  “Pastor Mathews asked Tom to play at church next Sunday. He said he had heard Tom was a fine piano player, and they would be honored if he would play for them. They haven’t had a good piano player since Miss Julie married and moved away.”

  Alex looked at Tom.

  A dull red covered his cheeks.

  It was the only color Alex had ever seen in the man’s pale, gaunt face.

  “And what did Tom say?”

  “He didn’t say nothin’.”

  “Anything,” Penny corrected.

  “Anything,” Lexie amended. “But Aunt Jewel said he played the best hymns she’d ever heard, and he would be pleased to play next Sunday.”

  “Jewel said that?” Alex couldn’t overcome his amazement.

  “And Papa, Mommy sang. It was so beautiful. You should have heard it.”

  Mommy sang.

  Alex looked at Penny.

  Her eyes were bright with unshed tears.

  Mommy sang.

  “I wish I had heard it.” He barely managed to say the words out loud.

  “It’s OK. You can hear her next Sunday. Right, Mommy?”

  Next Sunday.

  Alex’s gaze shot to Penny’s.

  “If I like the songs, I’ll sing.” Penny didn’t meet Alex’s questioning look.

  Alex reeled.

  The Lord worked in His own time, but this had to be a record.

  All of Alex’s dreams and needs answered in one day! His knees were weak, and he put a hand on the bar to steady himself. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, Lord!

  He wanted to grab all of his family in his arms and shout his thanks in a prayer, but he was afraid he’d overwhelm his friends, so he contained his joy.

  Just then, Brady Calhoun walked in. By his tone of voice, Alex could tell he’d already visited several other saloons.
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br />   Penny quickly ushered their daughter upstairs, and Alex turned to attend to his least favorite customer.

  Alex believed the old adage, “Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.” He was convinced Brady spent time in The Copper Penny so he could sell information to Holloway.

  Tonight the man’s mood and mouth were foul. After a short while, Alex was ready to usher him out.

  Then Brady said something that gave Alex pause.

  Last night, someone had thrown a rock through the large plate glass window of The Bodie Reporter.

  Of course, there were no witnesses, and Sheriff Andersen claimed there was nothing he could do.

  Alex didn’t have to ask where Brody had gotten his information.

  Holloway and his crew were probably laughing it up at The Crown Jewel even now.

  It was another “accident” like McDougal’s, Penny’s buyer for The Copper Penny. It was designed to frighten Thomas Wingate…and anyone else who didn’t fall into line with Holloway’s plans.

  Alex needed to pay a visit to Thomas first thing in the morning to find out how effective Holloway’s tactic had been. In the meantime, he’d put up with Brady to see what other information might slip out.

  The crowd was larger than usual.

  Alex recognized many of the men.

  Since the night they had filled the pie tin for Mrs. Spinetti, many of them had become regulars. They stopped in and sipped a drink, but mostly they talked. All in all, they bought less liquor and shared more news. Alex couldn’t help but be pleased…even if it was driving Penny out of business.

  Halfway through the night, Tom came downstairs and began to play.

  Some of the men recognized him. They teased him and called out songs.

  He joked back and even got some of them to sing the old familiar tunes.

  It was a satisfying night for Alex.

  But by the time the customers began to leave and Alex ushered Brady out, he was exhausted.

  Penny and Jewel looked more bedraggled than he felt. They had been doing extra chores to help Mrs. Spinetti, so he sent the women up to bed while he and Tom finished.

  When he crawled into bed at last, Penny was sound asleep.

  Even though he was anxious to talk to her, he didn’t want to disturb her. So he turned onto his side and by the moonlight peeking beneath the shade, he watched his sleeping wife.

  Her long, copper braid fell across the curve of her neck. Even in the shadows it seemed to burn like the dark embers of a fire. One hand nestled beneath her cheek. The other lay open on the pillow.

  She looked more peaceful than he had seen her since he returned. The lines along her mouth and the tightness of her lips were less pronounced. The years seemed washed away and she was his lovely, young bride again.

  He placed his palm on hers and gently gripped her fingers. Then he said a prayer of protection over her and fell asleep thanking God for the return of his wife.

  ****

  Alex woke early the next morning.

  Penny was still asleep.

  He dressed and hurried downstairs where Inga had a pot of coffee ready. He skipped breakfast but grabbed a cup to brace himself against the frigid Bodie morning.

  Thomas and all of his staff were already in the offices of The Bodie Reporter. A large board covered the window where the glass window should have been. “The Bodie Reporter” was painted in red on the wood. Inside, Thomas and his staff had the fire roaring in the potbelly stove.

  As soon as he entered, Alex crossed over to warm his fingertips.

  “We have to keep it pretty hot to fight off the cold leaking in around the board,” Thomas said as he shook Alex’s hand.

  “I’m sorry about this, Thomas. I think we both know who did this…or hired someone to do this.”

  Thomas nodded, his features grim and set. “Oh, Holloway doesn’t have to hire anyone. His crony Red Walters does whatever Holloway asks at the flick of his fingers.”

  They were both silent.

  Alex’s hopes sank. He looked around.

  Snow had blown in and caused more damage than he had expected. The expense would heavily impact the small paper’s finances.

  He hoped this incident hadn’t discouraged Thomas from printing the truth, but as Alex looked around at the damage, he was worried. He decided to help in the only way he could. “I feel responsible. I hope you’ll let me pay for the damages.”

  “No, it won’t be necessary.”

  Alex’s hopes sank even more. “At least let me replace the window.”

  Thomas shook his head. “I won’t replace it. There’s no need. As soon as I write today’s editorial, someone will probably throw another rock through it, so I’ll just leave the board up until this trouble passes.”

  Alex grinned and held out his hand. “I was hoping you’d say that.”

  “If Holloway wants war, he’ll get it.” Thomas nodded. “Although, it won’t be easy. He’s a dangerous man.”

  “He is,” Alex agreed, “but if we all stand against him, we can defeat him.”

  ****

  True to his word, Thomas ran an editorial the next day.

  His competitor, The Daily Tribune, anxious to get in on the action and sell papers, wrote an editorial condemning The Reporter for its unconfirmed allegations against one of Bodie’s leading citizens.

  A flame war of words waged in the papers for a few days, but died out.

  Alex suspected it was too hard for The Tribune to find ways to prove Holloway a leading citizen, and wisely dropped their cause.

  But the editorials and his own words gave him an idea. One day, he paid a visit to Penny’s neighbor, Angus McDougal. The saloon owner had not left town since his broken leg prohibited travel in the icy weather.

  Inga and Jann had spent quite a bit of time with the injured man, taking him food and helping him with his needs. They had kept everyone updated on his condition but made no mention of Angus’s business or his departure from Bodie.

  Alex suspected Holloway had not made good on his offer to actually purchase Angus’s saloon so the man could leave.

  Alex found Angus still confined to a cot near his potbellied stove. He was a small man with wiry red hair and a shaggy beard, grown shaggier since his accident. He confirmed Alex’s suspicions.

  “The dirty scoundrel,” Angus muttered. “Holloway knows I can’t run my business, can’t get up or out. There’s nothing I can do but sell what’s left of my liquor to him at a cut rate. He says we’ll seal the deal just as soon as I’m able to travel. In the meantime, I’m losing all I have.”

  “Then don’t do it.” Alex’s tone was low.

  “What?”

  “Don’t sell to Holloway. Sell your saloon to me.”

  Angus squinted at him from the shadows where he lay. “And why would you be wantin’ to buy my place?”

  “Because it looks like I’m going to be here for a long while and I don’t want Holloway for a neighbor.”

  McDougal studied him. “You know he won’t like it. You’ll be makin’ trouble for yourself and maybe even for me.”

  Alex nodded. “I can understand you might not want to do this. After all, you are the one laid up because of Holloway.”

  “Aye, and I’d like nothing better than to give that devil back some of his own.”

  Angus fiddled with the handle on his stove for a moment longer. “I’ll do it. I’ll sell you my saloon, but only half of it, enough to keep me afloat for now. My feelings have changed and I might have reason to stay here in Bodie.”

  Alex smiled, remembering some comments Jann had made about his mother and Mr. McDougal. “Yes, I’m quite fond of Inga and her pies. I’d say they’re reason enough to stay in Bodie.”

  Angus laughed out loud and reached for Alex’s extended hand. “Aye that they are.”

  12

  Lexie twisted and jerked the hair ribbon out of Penny’s hand for the fifth time.

  Penny caught her breath and placed her hands firmly
on her daughter’s shoulders. “If you don’t hold still, I’ll never get this tied and we’ll be late for the program.”

  “Oh, no, Mommy. We won’t be late. They can’t start the Christmas Eve play without me!”

  The church nativity play would most certainly start on time, with or without one bouncy little sheep in the background. But she couldn’t convince Lexie. Her daughter’s supreme sense of importance bemused Penny.

  “I don’t know where you get it. I certainly don’t have it,” she murmured.

  “Get what?”

  “Never mind. Now hold still so I can tie this.”

  She straightened the band of fluffy cotton and tied it firmly under Lexie’s chin. Then she smoothed the long floppy ears trimmed with pink.

  “There. I think that will do. Go show Inga how nice you look and thank her for all her hard work on your costume.”

  Lexie ran towards the kitchen, shouting Inga’s name.

  Jewel laughed. “I do not believe that child’s feet have touched the ground in two weeks.”

  It was true, but that wasn’t what made Penny smile. The sound of Jewel’s laughter brought joy into her heart. Penny couldn’t remember the last time she had heard it.

  The past weeks had seen a change in all their lives. Nothing monumental had happened since they started attending services at the small church.

  Penny couldn’t put a finger on any one single moment where she could say, “Right there. That’s when the Lord entered our lives.”

  But a new sense of well-being dwelt in her heart.

  The comfort Penny experienced was addictive. She wanted more, wanted it all. She attended every service at the church and listened every morning as Alex read wondrous stories. The words filled her like an empty vessel. They gave her a peace she’d never possessed.

  She loved the old Bible stories, the adventures, the colors, and strange places. She was proud of Jann’s stumbling but determined efforts to read. She sat enthralled as Alex read. The rich timbre of his voice, the deep confidence in his tone, as if all was right in his world. She wanted to lean into his arms and bask in the comfort there.

  With that startling revelation, she realized her emotions and responses weren’t quite as dead as she believed.