by Sarah Dosher
Red never left me far behind. He would fly into the distance and then circle back to see where I was. I walked and crawled after him as best I could, moving more out of sheer instinct than anything else. I finally discovered where he was leading me. Sunflower Beach. I had reached the place that held more good memories for me than anywhere else in this world. It was only fitting that if my life was going to end today, it would be here.
I followed the trail and rolled down the incline to the beach. When I stopped at the bottom, I saw Dean running toward me.
“Lily. Oh God! Lily.” He picked my face up out the sand and held my head. “What did he do to you?”
I reached behind me and pointed to the back of my head. The expression on his face turned grim as he saw where I’d been hit.
“You hold on, I’m going to get you help.” He gently lifted me into his arms. “Don’t you leave me! Do you hear me? Don’t you dare leave me.”
I felt my life slipping away. I tried to hold on, but no longer had the strength. Dean was safe and that was all that mattered. I looked into his frantic eyes one last time before my world turned black.
1 year later.
I heard her scream echo through our tiny apartment. It immediately made my hair stand on end and chills run down my spine, but my heart rate no longer increased and I didn’t run to answer her pleas for help. I’d grown accustomed to her nightmares over the past year. Thankfully it had stopped occurring multiple times per night and had become more of a weekly disturbance. I liked to think this was a sign of her healing.
I finished reading the sentence I was on and crawled off of our thrift store couch. I didn’t rush because I knew she’d need to reach a certain point in the events that haunted her dreams to be able to sleep peacefully the rest of the night. Her subconscious was still working through the events of that day…slowly, but surely. We both saw how this process was gradually evolving, but that didn’t make it easier on either of us. I hated seeing her so terrified, over and over.
I carefully opened our bedroom door, trying my best not to wake her. She was curled into a little ball in the center of the bed. The covers were hanging over the edge and threatened to fall to the floor. The only pillow still on the bed was mine and it was exactly where it should be, our fat cat Max slept soundly on top of it. This was the usual scene when her nightmares made an appearance before I got around to coming to bed.
“Leave Dean out of this!” she shouted, startling Max. He jumped about a foot into the air, looked straight at Lily, and gave her an annoyed meow before turning around in a circle and lying back down.
I knew she wasn’t far into her dream yet. She had several horrendous events to get through before it was over. I sat on the floor at the foot of the bed and waited for it to end so I could help tuck her back in for the night. While she dreamed, I couldn’t help but think back to that day when I almost lost her forever.
Sheriff Andy and I had searched the entire town, but hadn’t found a single trace of where she might have been taken. I decided to go back to Lily’s house in case her or her father showed up. I was pacing in front of her door when Red landed on the hood of my truck with a loud bang. I had no doubt he knew exactly where she was. He never let her out of his sight for too long. We stared at each other for several seconds.
“Where is she Red?” I snapped.
He started shrieking at me and flew up into the air. I watched as he grew smaller and smaller, flying into the distance. I ran around the house and caught sight of him again as he slowly descended. I immediately knew where he was landing. I ran back to my truck and took off down the road.
Once I made it to Sunflower Beach, Red was sitting on the same huge rock I’d seen him perch on before. He didn’t even wait for me to approach before he flew away again, leaving me completely alone. I don’t know what I expected, but I sat on that damn rock for hours, waiting for him to come back. Several times I’d convinced myself that I was wasting precious time just sitting there and twiddling my thumbs when I needed to be looking for her, but then I’d freeze and convince myself to wait just a few minutes longer. Lily always trusted that stupid bird and for some reason I felt compelled to do the same.
Hours later Red finally came back. I watched as he hovered above the secluded beach, loudly squawking for several minutes before he flew toward the trail and landed in the small opening. That’s when I saw her stumble and fall down the incline, landing face down in the sand. My eyes immediately went to the dark red blood covering both her arms. I heard her moan as she rolled onto her side. There was more blood than I’d ever seen covering the back of her white shirt. Her blonde hair was almost black with blood and matted to her neck. I didn’t know what to do; I was so scared that I froze and just stared at her. A million thoughts coursed through my brain, trying to come up with what I could do to save the only person I’d ever loved. Tears streamed down my face, completely blurring my vision. I couldn’t lose her. She couldn’t leave me after everything we’d been through, after how hard we’d fought to finally find each other again.
I touched her face and she started to scream and pull away. “It’s me, it’s Dean.” I heard my voice crack as I spoke and hoped she couldn’t hear it. She leaned into my body and sobbed. I carefully picked her up and ran to my truck. I opened the passenger side door and laid her down gently then took off my shirt and wadded it up to place under her head. I drove as fast and carefully as I could to the Kolby hospital.
Our tiny hospital wasn’t equipped for this kind of trauma. They immediately called for a helicopter to fly her to the trauma center that was over two hours away. I watched as a doctor and several nurses fluttered around her, hooked her to various machines and cleaned the blood from her battered body. The more blood they removed, the worse she looked. I hadn’t been there to protect her. How could I have let this happen? I should have stopped him a long time ago, long before it reached this point. I felt the anger at myself grow inside me. I’d failed her again. I would find him this time and I would kill him myself if I had to.
She opened her eyes and looked right at me. “It was him…Violet…it was him.” She closed her eyes, but kept her head turned my direction.
“Don’t talk, Sunflower. Just rest. You’re gonna be okay, you hear me? You’re gonna be okay.”
She lightly shook her head and fought to open her eyes. “It was…killed her.” Her voice cracked. Tears rolled down the side of her face and dripped onto the white cloth covering the hospital bed.
I tried to calm her by gently running my hand across her forehead. “Shh. It’s okay. We’re gonna be okay.” But I didn’t believe it. We’d never been okay before, so why would our luck change now?
“He told…everything. You…Easton…our brother.” She was having trouble talking. She coughed and gagged with every word she spoke.
The team from the helicopter rushed into the room and I was pushed outside the doors. A nurse I’d known for most of my life gave me the information about what hospital she was being taken to and told me I needed to leave soon because the helicopter would get there much faster. I nodded because I heard her, but I wasn’t absorbing anything she said.
She took me by the hand and led me out the front doors of the hospital. “Sweetheart, I know this is hard, but you need to stay focused. Lily is one of the strongest young ladies I’ve ever known, you stay strong for her.” She walked me to my truck and told me to drive.
Lily was in surgery when I finally arrived at the trauma center. I didn’t see her again until almost two days later when she was finally well enough for visitors. The ICU nurses and I became good friends during the months she was there. Lily improved everyday, but it was a long road. I’d come so close to losing her and, no matter how brave a face she put on each and every day, I knew how close we’d come to being separated for the last time.
It took her weeks to be able to tell me what her father had said about Easton and Violet. The news about Violet wasn’t that shocking after I saw how similarly Li
ly had been hurt by him. I wished there was something I could have done for Violet. Whatever Violet had done to make Michael angry enough to attack her had probably been worth it to her in the end.
The news about Easton was the hardest for me to accept. Part of me thought it made perfect sense. We’d always looked like brothers and he always felt like my brother deep inside. Knowing I had a sibling I’d never be able to see again destroyed me. That day Lily told me we mourned for those we lost because of her father, but we also made a vow to never let his memory harm us again.
I knew I owed Lily’s life to Red. That damn bird had led us both to the same spot so we’d find each other. Without him, I probably would have never found her. We never saw Red after that day. I don’t know if it was because we never stepped foot back in Kolby or if Lily was right all along and he was Easton, back to save her from their father.
It took the police days to find Michael’s body. There was no investigation and no questions about what caused his death. The only ending he received was a quiet burial that no one attended.
No one would miss him.
The sound of the bed squeaking shook me from my memories. Lily rolled over and slowly stretched. I stood from the floor, gathered the covers, and laid on the bed next to her. She peeked at me with one eye open; I smiled at her and ran my hand down her cheek.
“One more outta the way,” I said as I pulled her close.
“Yup,” she said through a yawn. “They’re not as scary anymore. I think I’m starting to get more pissed off during the dream than actually being scared. I might be getting there after all.”
I kissed her forehead. “We’ll get there and until we do, we’ve always got each other.”
She draped her leg over my waist and moved to straddle my hips. “And in the meantime, it’s kinda nice finding new ways to keep busy in the middle of the night. I mean, you don’t want to keep studying for that final, right?” She trailed kisses down my bare chest.
“Final? Nah, I think I can pass the class. No need to be an over achiever.” She laughed against the sensitive skin just above my waistband before slipping her hand inside.
The aroma of bacon and coffee woke me, exactly what every warm-blooded man wanted to wake up to. I turned over in bed. Lily was still lying next to me and I sat straight up, ready to run out of the room.
“Calm down. You know it’s just Adley and Derek. Can’t you hear her singing?” Lily said, her eyes still closed. “They’ve been in there forever. Waking to her voice is not the perfect way to start the day.”
I laughed at how grumpy Lily always was first thing in the morning. “I can barely hear her. It was the smell that woke me.”
“Honey, I know you haven’t wanted to talk about it, but you know why they’re here so early this morning making breakfast. Don’t you?”
“Because neither one of them ever goes grocery shopping so they steal our food?” I said, trying to avoid this topic. Lily opened her eyes and raised her eyebrows at me. “Yes, okay. I know why they’re here. I know it’s her birthday and I want to celebrate. I just miss her so much.”
“I know you do, we all miss her. But we promised we’d keep her tradition from now on since we couldn’t last year while I was in the hospital. All you have to make it through is breakfast. Surely you can survive pancakes?” I wasn’t sure if I could survive Adley’s pancakes.
There was a pounding on our bedroom door. “Wakey, wakey, eggs, and bakey,” I heard Derek call from the hallway.
Lily lightly pressed her lips to mine. “C’mon, before he eats all the bacon,” she said before hurrying out of the room.
“And blueberry pancakes too, don’t forget about the pancakes!” Adley yelled from the kitchen.
I got dressed and walked toward the living room where everyone was scattered, eating their breakfast.
“You better hurry up, man. I’m trying to save you some bacon, but Lily’s already eaten half of it,” Derek joked. Lily threw some scrambled eggs at his head.
“I only had three slices. You’re the one that’s eaten a whole plate already.”
I walked past Derek and snatched a slice of bacon from his plate. “Adley, please tell me you actually know how to make pancakes better than lasagna or brownies or fried chicken or whatever else you’ve made us suffer through lately.”
She threw a slice of bacon at me that I caught midair and ate. She rolled her eyes. “Dean, I’m a very good chef. Sometimes I just have minor setbacks in the kitchen.”
“Minor setbacks in the kitchen? You call what you’ve forced us to eat recently, minor setbacks?” I questioned.
“Hey, you guys still ate it, so it couldn’t have been that bad.”
“Setting fire to the kitchen and almost burning down the entire apartment complex is a minor setback?” Lily added with a smirk on her face. We both looked to Derek because we assumed one of his smart ass comments was coming.
He held up his hands and shook his hand. “Nope, don’t look at me. I have no complaints in the food department. I’m just happy to have food…if you can call some of the things she feeds us food.” Everyone, including Adley, laughed.
It was a great sound.
I smiled as I thought about how happy Grandma Violet would be to see us now. We lived in the perfect college town with Adley and Derek as our neighbors, but you could hardly call them that since they were in our apartment more than their own.
Although I’d never been back to Kolby to finish my student teaching, I had enrolled in a Master’s program at my old school. It was proving to be tough, but I welcomed the challenge. Lily hadn’t started college yet, but she planned to enroll next year. Adley and Derek were both enrolled in school, though I wasn’t sure how often they actually attended. I think they spent more time skipping class and laying around their apartment together.
We were slowly moving forward and healing. I knew we could never forget what we had been through, but at least we’d been through it together and had come out the other side forever bonded. I loved Lily more with each passing day and I knew she felt the same. We had let the storms of life keep us apart for too long.
We’d never be apart again.
If you or someone you know is a victim of child abuse, please contact Childhelp. www.childhelp.org or call 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453)
First and foremost I want to thank my family for always putting up with me. Your love and support is what keeps me going. I never would have been able to write such a dysfunctional family relationship without first experiencing your unfaltering love.
To my husband and twins, without you my crazy life would not be worth living. Thank you for still loving me while I was writing this book. I know you think I’m permanently attached to my laptop, but I promise to take a short break from that relationship. Well until I begin my next book…
Thank you, Kate Mathias, my soul sister. There are no words to express what your friendship and love have meant to me. Your daily encouragement was the only thing that kept me going most days. I look forward to the many books we’ll write…
Thank you to The Writers Club, each of you accepted me from the beginning and offered continuous support and knowledge when I had nothing to give in return. Never doubt what our group is capable of accomplishing when we come together without the drama and rivalry seen far too often.
Thank you Jennifer Roberts! You are an editing goddess. I’m sorry that you had to experience my poor grammar skills firsthand, I’m so thankful you didn’t run for the hills.
Thank you Angela McLaurin from Fictional formats for making my mess look beautiful…and for putting up with my numerous changes with nothing but a smile on your face.
Thank you Sarah Hansen from Okay Creations. You took my scattered vision and turned it into a visual work of art.
Thank you to all of my betas, each of you helped save my story in your own way – Mindi (yes, another red headed Mindi) thank you for allowing me to name such a villain after you, Lisa, Kathryn, Jade, Leighta, Steph
(Sweets by Steph A.K.A. the BEST cookies you’ll ever eat), Melanie, Paige, Jessica, and Kate. And my very first betas that read this book when it was only a few poorly written chapters and offered nothing but support – Kate, Sharon (my mom), and Katie (my sister).
Thank you to the numerous blogs that have offered me support and encouragement. Without your tireless efforts none of us would have a clue about all the fabulous books being traditionally and self-published daily. You all devote so many hours to what can sometimes be a thankless passion.
Special thanks to: Shh, Mom’s Reading, Sinfully Sexy Book Reviews, The Indie Bookshelf, The Book Hookers, Word, Book Crush, First Class Books, Candy Coated Book Blog (I’m saving Ian for you!), The Book Brothel, Madison Says, Into the Night Reviews, Hardcover Therapy, For the Love of Books, Love Between the Sheets, Rude Girl Book Blog, Always a Book Lover, Hooked on Books, Angie’s Dreamy Reads, YA Indie Princess, Autumn Review, Totally Booked, Tough Critic Book Reviews, Elizabeth Gunderson, and Fred LaBaron. I owe you all a big hug when we finally cross paths in person!
Thank you to all the writers that have spent countless hours creating magic. Without your inspiration I would have never attempted this dream.
Thank you to all of YOU that supported me from the beginning and have offered so many words of encouragement and virtual hugs during this process.
Sarah can be found on some form of social media pretty much 24 hours a day and loves connecting with fellow readers.