“You should join them,” he murmured. This close, he could see the weariness darkening the skin beneath her eyes. “Tomorrow will be another hard day.”
“Varian, we all need more than a night’s rest. Even you.” She turned her head and he saw the faint glow of her eyes. Violet ringed with green. A very familiar reaction from the past he’d just been remembering. “Four days of hard traveling has taken its toll on all of us, particularly the children.”
“We can’t fall any farther behind.” Her lips thinned. He sighed, his breath frosting in front of him in a white cloud. “A day’s rest. It’s all we can afford.”
“We need three, minimum.” Her words were pitched low, her voice as hard as rocks they sat on. He shook his head in silent disagreement. “Have you even looked at your scouts’ eyes this evening? The children? They’re bloodred. We’ve used all our energy reserves escaping Na’Reish territory. We need to hunt, feed, and sleep.”
“If we lose Annika’s trail then we lose hope of finding the human city.”
“If we keep going as exhausted as we are then you can guarantee the humans will notice us. We’ll make a mistake when we can least afford it; it might even be you.”
A tremor of genuine fear underlay her words. Her blunt truth wasn’t one he wanted to hear but he could always rely on Lisella to tell it like it was. Another trait he admired in her.
“Do you think we’ll remain undetected in human territory if we stay in one place that long? They’re more vigilant than the Na’Reish.”
She shrugged. “Then we move every day.” Her gaze met his. “Send out a scout to track Annika, have them leave markers.” Her tone was hard, determined. “We’ll follow once everyone’s recovered enough to travel.”
He peered toward the cave mouth and heard only the breeze rustling the leaves of the bushes around him. The sweet odor of wood smoke wafted to him on the next puff of air. There was no quiet murmur of voices or soft singing to lull the most reluctant child to sleep. Exhaustion had been persuasion enough.
He inclined his head. “All right. We’ll hunt and rest but not for long.”
“See how our people recover first.”
He nodded once and in his mind sorted through the names of the scouts asleep in the cave. “Let Zaune sleep through the night. At first light I’ll send him out to find and mark a trail. He’ll need a hearty breakfast and a pack of supplies.”
She nodded. “Thank you, Varian.”
The tension he sensed in her when she’d come looking for him eased. He scrubbed a hand over his face and rolled his shoulders to loosen muscles that had remained motionless in the cold for too long.
“I didn’t mean to make things more difficult earlier today. I’m sorry.” Her apology came out of nowhere. He knew he’d revealed his surprise when she smiled. She reached out to place a gloved hand on his forearm. “We’re all scared. There’s talk about turning back.”
Varian frowned, already suspecting the identities of the doubters. “We can’t do that. They’d prefer to live half-lives back in the compound, hiding and scavenging, living in constant fear of being discovered by the Na’Reish?”
“They’re scared. It’s natural to want the security of the familiar, even when it’s dangerous. The uncertainty of our new future is frightening them.”
“Hesia warned us it wasn’t going to be easy.”
“I know.” Lisella smiled sadly. He knew what she was thinking: the old healer should have come with them instead of staying behind but Hesia had known she’d have only slowed them down. “She saved each of us. I keep reminding everyone that we have to trust what she told us and keep going. You rarely spend time with the others so I thought you should know what was going on.”
He was appreciative of what she’d done to avert a potential problem. He’d been so caught up in keeping them safe he’d never even noticed the unrest she’d spoken of.
Lisella laid a hand on his forearm and squeezed. “You don’t have to shoulder the responsibility of this all on your own, Varian. Share your plans, talk to us. We’re all capable, even the young ones. You’ve trained us for this venture for years.”
She read him well. Her quiet words struck deep. Slowly he nodded. “I just want us to succeed.”
“Lady willing, we will.”
He envied the complete faith he heard in her voice and wished he could feel certain that things would go well. So much hinged on Annika, and she didn’t even realize they existed.
Lisella squeezed his arm again. “A day at a time, Varian.” He lifted an eyebrow at the familiar saying, one they bandied around as children. “I recognize that blank-faced expression. You worry too much.”
He grunted. “You care too much.”
“It’s what I do best.” She pushed to her feet. “Good night.”
“’Night.” She deserved something better than a generic send-off. “Lisella, thank you. I couldn’t do this without your help.”
Her smile was wide and he felt the warmth of it deep down in his soul. No wonder people responded so well to her. She nodded and entered the cave. Her reminder was timely. For the moment, their survival relied on them getting through one day at a time.
He would do well to remember that in the future.
THE winter sun was barely an hour old when Annika followed Kalan from the farmer’s croft to begin another day of traveling. Heavy frost crunched underfoot and the forest around them held an anticipatory stillness broken only by the occasional birdcall. The air was fresh enough to help shake the vestiges of sleep from her head.
Securing the hood of the cloak over her head, she sent a prayer heavenward, thanking the Lady for a peaceful start to the day. Other than a brief greeting from Kalan morning conversation was non-existent. Not that she minded after what had happened the night before.
Her cheeks flamed at the memory. Mother of Light, the enticing odor of dark spiciness and heated male still clung to her nostrils. With her knowledge as a healer she could categorize hundreds of scents, all important when diagnosing an illness but Kalan’s arousal had been beyond her realm of experience. She hadn’t been able to identify it at first. Until he’d leaned in to kiss her.
Her stomach knotted hard. Why had he done that? Her mind came up blank. She didn’t understand how he could go from hating her to wanting to kiss her to conveying shock as if he hadn’t anticipated his own actions, to insulting her. She had been so careful to hide her attraction to him but somehow she’d betrayed herself and he’d used it against her. Why else would he have tried to kiss her?
Chills shivered over her skin. Did it really matter now? He was just like Savyr, taunting her, playing on her weakness. but for what purpose?
Back at the ferry, Vash had suggested Kalan hand her over to the Blade Council for information. Did he think by toying with her emotions he could control her? Having an unresisting captive would make the journey to Sacred Lake easier for him.
Why did he feel it necessary to manipulate her? After revealing her sordid history, couldn’t he see she held no allegiance to the Na’Reish?
The knot in her stomach twisted. Annika stroked the leather shoulder strap of her healer’s pouch and considered ingesting a little vaa’jahn to ease the feeling. If only.
Whatever his reasons for the previous night’s actions, now that she understood what his scent meant she could preempt him if anything like last night were to happen again. Adapting to circumstances was one thing she could claim experience with. He wouldn’t catch her off guard again.
“We’ll use the traders’ road.” Kalan’s voice drew her back to their surroundings. The air frosted in front of his mouth as he wrapped one of their blankets around his shoulders. He waited until she drew level with him before starting along the compacted trail.
“What about Na’Hord Patrols?” she asked. “If they cross the river they’ll spot our tracks.”
Ahead of them fog ghosted the ground and battled for dominance with the pale beams of sunlight beginning to dapple t
he trail.
“The risk is offset by the advantage of speed. We can cover quite a distance today using the road. By midday I want to be in the foothills.”
“The Lower Crags,” she murmured.
“You know of them?”
“My father has a map on the wall of his chambers. I’ve only seen it a few times but I know scouts add information to it after every foray into human territory.”
Kalan said nothing further for the next half hour, seemingly content to walk beside her on the trail. Had he engaged in conversation just to be friendly? Given her earlier thoughts, pumping her for more information about what she knew of human territory would fit with his plan.
Useful for the knowledge she could provide his precious Blade Council. If that was his strategy, it was the more likely scenario. The idea left her heavyhearted. It shouldn’t. She’d been disappointed so many times in the past that once more shouldn’t make a difference. Hesia was the only person she considered a friend. The old healer had never betrayed her or offered false promises.
She didn’t need Kalan’s friendship. She’d survive without it. Even as she thought the words, Annika knew she was fooling herself. Shooting a furtive glance in Kalan’s direction, she couldn’t ignore that the tall warrior walking beside her was coming to mean something to her. She shied away from exactly what, not willing to go there just yet. It was unsettling enough to know she couldn’t control her emotions around him.
“Who taught you the skills of the trail?”
His sudden question drew her back to the present. “What?”
“You’re deep in thought yet you just skirted that puddle to avoid breaking the ice and marking your trail.” He waved a hand at the trail behind them. “You’re trail savvy.”
She cast a brief look back at the puddle then shrugged one shoulder. There was little harm in telling him. “As a child, I watched the Na’Reish instructors teaching the trainees. It helped fill in my day. The skills came in handy when I didn’t want to be found by my father or his friends.”
A grimace flickered across his face. “You say that so matter-of-factly.”
“So?”
“Hiding from a father is not something a child usually does.”
She met his eyes, her gaze level. “You do if you want to survive.” Her childhood was as far from normal as he could probably imagine.
“A friend and I used to slip away from the training barracks to go to the night market.”
She blinked, amazed Kalan hadn’t delved into her past by asking more questions. She shot him a glance. He caught her inquisitive look. A smile played around the corners of his mouth.
“The taboo of the night market was irresistible,” he elaborated. “Learning how to scale trees without the use of a rope helped us get over the compound wall.”
“What’s a night market?”
“A select quarter of the city that caters to after-dark entertainment… pleasures of the flesh and other interests.”
“Oh.” Her cheeks flushed with heat.
“I preferred the alehouses.” Laughter tinged his words. The light-hearted expression on his face filled her with warmth.
“Were you ever caught?”
“Many times.” His smile widened. “Arek and I spent a lot of our free time cleaning out the animal stalls.”
“That was considered punishment?” At Kalan’s nod, Annika grunted. “Na’Reish warriors were flogged if they were caught disobeying their instructors’ rules. I treated those punished for infractions.” Stepping off the trail, she halted beside a small, dark-leafed bush. The clusters of brown berries hanging from it made her mouth water. She broke off a couple of branches and gave him one. “Who’s Arek?”
He popped a couple of the tart-tasting fruit into his mouth before replying. “My second-in-command. We grew up and trained together as Light Blade warriors.”
She hesitated before asking her next question. “Was he with you when you were captured by the Na’Reish?”
“No, thank the Lady. I’d left him to attend a meeting of the Blade Council in my stead.”
Annika finished her impromptu breakfast mulling over the snippets of his life. She longed to ask him more about it but didn’t want to fall into the trap of becoming too comfortable with him.
Know your enemy. Savyr’s much-uttered warning came to mind. Perhaps she could play Kalan at his own game, if that’s what he was doing with her.
“Ask your questions, Annika, I don’t mind answering them.”
Her head jerked up in astonishment. “How did you know—?”
He motioned to the branch in her hand. “You’ve been snapping pieces of it off. It’s the same habit I use when thinking.”
Glancing down, she saw what was left of the branch. Shaking her head, she tossed it to the side of the trail. Out of the corner of her eye she could see him waiting for her to respond. He seemed so… comfortable… conversing with her, not at all calculating.
“Aren’t you worried I’ll use this information against you?” she blurted.
Fool! Savyr’s derisive tone rang in her head. Never give away your intentions.
Kalan’s brow creased with a frown. “What are you talking about?”
“I can’t believe you’re so ignorant of what could happen.” She gestured between them. “Isn’t this what the conversation is all about? Engage in friendly chatter, swap some innocuous tidbits then get me to tell you any Na’Reish secrets I might happen to know? The situation can be manipulated both ways, Light Blade.”
Kalan halted in the middle of the pathway and pivoted on his boot heel. “This isn’t about eliciting secrets from you.” He stared at her for several long heartbeats, a stunned look on his face. “You can’t believe I’d do something like that.”
“Considering your past actions, why wouldn’t I?”
He grimaced as if he’d tasted something unpleasant. “Mother of Mercy, this is such a convoluted situation.” He strode several steps down the track away from her then paced back, raking a hand through his hair. “I’m truly sorry this is the result of everything that’s happened.”
The light citrus odor emanating from him stopped her from rejecting his apology outright. She inhaled again. There was no mistaking it. His response was genuine, and scents didn’t lie.
“Annika, Lady knows my behavior toward you has been disgraceful.” The ruddy color in his cheeks darkened but his gaze never wavered. “I’ve done little to inspire your trust in me but can’t we put aside our differences? I want to get to know you better, and not for any underhanded reason.” The muscle along his jaw tightened. “Just because I’m willing to talk about my life doesn’t mean I expect you to reciprocate in any way. I’m prepared for this to be a one-way arrangement if that’s what it takes to prove I’m sincere.”
To leave a wrong undone against another is to disrespect the Lady’s teachings. The words came from Annika’s childhood, from a conversation she’d had with Hesia, though at the time she hadn’t understood their meaning. Recalling it now, when she sorely needed her friend’s advice most made it seem like the old healer was right there beside her.
A dream of the heart is one worth any sacrifice, Annika. She could almost feel Hesia’s work-roughened fingers trailing over her cheek. She would urge her to trust Kalan. The old woman had grown up respecting the Light Blade warriors and their reputations. Annika hadn’t.
Will you let fear destroy your dream? Annika bit her lip. She’d planned and worked too hard to give up now. If Kalan was sincere in his intentions, there was only one way to find out.
“Hesia spoke of the Blade Council.” Where to start? Perhaps with information she could verify, to see if he was candid with his responses. “Your people are ruled by them, aren’t they?”
Kalan nodded, his expression bemused, as if he’d expected a very different question than the one she voiced. “The Council is made up of the Lady’s Chosen and five Councilors, all retired warriors. The Councilors represent different provinces
within our territory.”
She nodded, more to herself than to acknowledge his answer. “What is the Lady’s Chosen?” Again, another fact she could confirm.
“A Light Blade selected by the Lady to lead the Council.”
Her jaw slackened. “She chooses? You don’t base leadership on bloodlines or strength?”
“Blood relatives can be elevated to the position temporarily until the Lady approves the Council’s choice or indicates Her own. Unlike the Na’Reish, the strongest warrior doesn’t necessarily have the greatest potential to lead our people.”
“I assumed you had one ruler.” Her breath caught. A female deity and multiple leaders. Details Hesia had probably taken for granted but never shared with her. “And is your Chosen male or female?”
“We’ve had both in the past.” His gaze flickered to the forest. He motioned for them to resume their trek along the track. “The current Chosen is male.”
Something about his tone caught her attention. “You don’t like him?”
He cleared his throat as a wry grin shaped his lips. “Depends what mood he’s in,” he said. “For the most part he’s well liked.” Again she sensed something odd in his comments but he continued speaking before she could inquire about it. “The village Councils listen to what their people want, they pass that on to the Councilors. The Blade Council then tries to make the best decision possible.”
“Everyone gets a say in what happens?”
“Yes. Everyone might not eventually agree that the decision made suits them, but they’ve had the chance to make their views known.”
She whistled softly. He was sharing information as he’d promised. While he wasn’t expecting her to reveal anything in return, the disparity in their cultures was too startling not to.
“Only the most powerful Na’Reish families benefit from any decision made by my father. In return for their loyalty he’d sometimes award special dispensations: extra blood-slaves, a rank among the Na’Hord, a family alliance.” She frowned. “If your Council spends all its time talking about what everyone wants, how do they get anything done?”
Vengeance Born (The Light Blade #1) Page 12