“Rinnel’s another pot of salve, though. He’s jus’ a big bully ’n one day someone’s gonna pop him good for pickin’ on the young’uns—” She suddenly stopped talking and gave her a lopsided grin. “Healer Danna says I chatter too much.” A small, cold hand covered hers. “You never did tell me iffen you needed help.” The girl’s voice dropped to a whisper. “I still feel you hurtin’.”
“It’s not something a healer can fix, Rissa,” Annika admitted. It was the second time the girl had made the odd comment. “So, how do you know I’m hurting anyway?”
“The Lady Gifted me with the skill to sense others’ pain.” The child shrugged. “I’m still learnin’ to use it prop’ly. Bein’ able to tell the diff’rence between a body pain and soul pain takes years of trainin’. So, yours is soul pain, huh? Who hurt you?”
There was such a warm innocence about the human child that Annika didn’t feel threatened by her blunt questions. She sighed and stared up at the pale blue sky. Beyond the quiet sanctuary of the niche she could hear the muted goings-on of the compound and wondered if anyone was searching for her yet. Was Kalan looking for her?
“No one person hurt me, Rissa,” she finally said, looking down at the child. “It was their attitude and beliefs that upset me.”
“What’s that mean?”
“You said you’re training to be a healer?” She nodded. “I’m a healer, too, but my mentor wasn’t allowed to teach me how to read and write. The people who hurt me think just because I don’t have these skills I’m worthless.”
“They teased you ’cause you didn’t know?” Rissa’s dark eyes flashed. “I was seven when I was brought here to be trained. That’s late to be found with a Gift. The other children teased me ’cause my readin’ and writin’ wasn’t as good as theirs so I know what that feels like.” She tilted her head. “How did you learn everythin’ to become a healer if you couldn’t write it down?”
“I listened hard, repeated everything told to me over and over in my mind many times, watched closely, and remembered it.” Annika met her gaze. “Do you recall everything you’ve said to me since you crawled through that bush?”
Rissa’s brow furrowed a moment then she shook her head. Annika recited their entire conversation word for word.
The girl grinned and clapped. “Mother of Mercy, with a memory like that you’d learn to read ’n write in no time!” She jumped off the bench, waving the broken branch. “I could teach you the letters ’n sounds right now, if you like.”
With her boot, she cleared small rocks and debris from a spot on the ground then scraped the stick over the dirt making a curve and a line that joined. Annika craned her neck to see what she wrote.
Propping a hand on one skinny hip she pointed with the stick. “That’s the letter a and it makes two sounds… ah and ay.”
Annika’s heart leapt as she recognized the symbol from the writing in the book Davyn demanded she’d read. Excitement curled in the pit of her stomach.
“Show me more,” she said and shared a smile with her small companion.
Rissa, trainee healer and destroyer of gardens, took to her task with enthusiasm. Her lack of guile soothed away the residual ache left behind in Annika’s heart after the Council meeting.
Annika knelt on the ground to copy the symbols, a fiery determination to master them as quickly as possible growing with every passing heartbeat.
“KALAN, none of the Light Blades say she’s on any of the rooves in the compound. Where else could she have gone?”
Kymora’s voice drifted out from his apartment to where Kalan stood on the balcony after searching the apartment. Her staff tapped on the floor as she came toward him. He peered down into the garden. Relief rushed through him when he saw a familiar blond head of hair seated next to a small child in the secluded niche below.
“Lady of Light, thank you,” he murmured, hours of searching and worry eased.
“Kalan?”
“Shh, it’s all right, Kymora. I’ve found her.”
His sister reached the balcony wall and her head tilted to one side. A breeze carried Annika’s voice toward them. “Who’s she with?”
“I think it’s one of the children from the Barracks. A girl, maybe eight or nine years old, dark, curly hair, dressed in healer’s colors.”
“Sounds like Rissa.” A slow smile curved his sister’s lips. “If I’m not mistaken they’re learning sounds and letters.”
From his elevated position Kalan could see a number of symbols carved into the ground. They listened as Annika recited each name and letter as Rissa pointed to it. When she finished their delighted laughter drifted up to them.
“Her memory and recall is amazing,” Kymora murmured. “She wasn’t exaggerating when she told the Council she had all her learning inside her head.”
He grit his teeth at her reference to the debacle of a meeting that had occurred that morning. “They never even gave her a chance. Never intended to.”
His sister reached out to touch his arm. “The Lady said her arrival would bring opposition.” Her hand slid to cover his. “Candra listened. The contents of Annika’s pouch impressed her. I heard her speaking to Benth and Corvas after you ejected Davyn from the chamber.”
“Their intolerance hurt Annika.”
Davyn’s heartless act of exposing Annika’s illiteracy twisted inside him like a knife blade. She’d stared at the page with undisguised longing and hunger. Her eyes had changed color, from pale green to orange then black. The anger in her gaze had not just been for the Councilors.
“I know. I could hear it in her voice as she stood up to them.” Kymora’s warm hand tightened on his. “You didn’t mention their hatred.”
Kalan sighed heavily and raked a hand through his hair. “Annika expected that. Hatred is something she’s lived with all her life. Sadly she’s used to it.”
“It certainly gives new meaning to the Lady’s words… draw strength from life’s experiences.” Kymora gave a dry chuckle. “And she was strong this morning, older brother.”
Annika’s fierce independence was one of her greatest assets, and one of the many characteristics that attracted him to her. A reluctant smile lifted the corners of his mouth as he remembered her parting statement to the Council. The truth of her words had been punctuated with such fire as she’d stood up to their attempt to humiliate her.
He inhaled a ragged breath. “She’s one of the most resilient, courageous women I know, Kym,” he admitted.
“Annika didn’t know you were the Lady’s Chosen, did she?”
“I wanted to tell her…”
“But if the Na’Reish had found out, you wouldn’t be standing here now.”
“Initially, yes, that’s why I didn’t tell her.” A muscle ticked in his jaw. “I was going to once we arrived safely here but the night we arrived I desperately wanted to see you. She insisted I go…”
Kymora made a tsking sound. “And on your return you found Arek trying to kill her… Oh, Kalan, you couldn’t have predicted how events would turn out.”
“One bad judgment call after another…” he whispered. “We both worked so hard to establish the measure of trust we had before today.”
Below them Annika drew more letters in the dirt and he listened to her sound them out. Such single-minded determination made his heart swell.
“You care for her.”
He stiffened with Kymora’s quiet words. Slowly he turned to look at her. Her sightless gaze was fixed firmly on his face, her expression one of gentle acceptance.
“You should know by now how finely tuned my ears are to listening to people,” she said, her words mildly censuring. “When you speak about Annika your tone softens. The timbre of your voice deepens. It’s quite obvious really.”
Kalan snorted. “Only you would claim something like that.”
“Avoiding the issue isn’t allowed, brother mine.” She waggled a finger at him. “Ask yourself this. How would you feel tomorrow if she decided to leave and never come back?”<
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His growled protest arched Kymora’s eyebrows. The strength of his reaction gave him pause. He sought out Annika in the garden below, needing to know she was safe. She was still there, crouched on the ground over the letters, her blond head close to Rissa’s dark one.
“Are you questioning the path the Lady has chosen for you, Kalan?” Kymora asked.
“Surprisingly, not anymore.” He grunted. “And that’s a first for me.”
“Then why so silent?”
“I was thinking how well Annika has handled everything with honor and dignity.”
Every time he thought of her, of the way she touched him or spoke his name, his heart lightened. Annika had tangled herself in his thoughts, wrapped herself around his soul, and slid right in next to his heart. The realization filled him with the most incredible sense of peace.
He let out a slow, amazed breath. “She makes me happy.”
“Sounds like you love her.”
Kymora’s blunt statement was like a blow to his gut. He opened his mouth to issue an immediate denial then altered his words at the last moment. “I can’t love her, Kym.”
“No? Why not? Because she’s Na’Chi? If you’d believed her to be a danger to us, you would never have brought her here. You did, so you’ve accepted her. Are you afraid of what the Council will think?”
He fisted his hands. “Whatever our personal friendship might be it’s none of their business.”
“Your personal friendship with Annika will affect what happens next, Kalan, whether you like it or not.” He hated that she was right. Kymora’s brow creased. “The Lady’s guided you this far, Kalan. Don’t doubt what you feel. You never have before.”
“Your faith was always so much stronger than mine. You follow Her path without question. I’m not like that, Kym.” He shook his head. “It’s too soon to know what I feel for Annika…”
“Figure it out, Kalan, because particular Councilors will take any hint of uncertainty and question your support for her. That will spread down through the ranks to their advocates.” Kymora touched his shoulder. “Face the truth in your heart and embrace it. Then stand united before the Council.”
“You know I don’t like being forced into a decision before I’m ready.”
“Do you think Davyn will wait for you to decide?” Her expression softened. “Just don’t take too long.” Her warning sent a shiver along his spine. She squeezed his shoulder. “Now that you know where Annika is, I’ll leave you to think. I’ve temple duties to attend to.”
He spoke as she reached the door to his room. “Kymora.” She turned partway round. “Thank you for offering your advice, even though you knew I wouldn’t like it.”
A wry smile curved her lips. “Isn’t that what sisters are for?”
He chuckled. “You also make a good Temple Elect advising your leader. You’re right about the Council.”
Her smile widened. “If it hadn’t been for you and Arek helping me in my early days as Temple Elect I don’t know how I would have accomplished half of what I did.” She inclined her head in thanks. “I’m glad I can return the favor.”
As the door closed behind her, Kalan’s grin faded. The light-hearted moment disappeared as his thoughts returned to their conversation, or more rightly, the subject of their conversation.
Loving Annika.
He couldn’t love her. But her compassion, determination, empathy, even her temper attracted him. Her capricious nature and fierceness certainly fired his blood. As did the way she responded to his touch. The memory of her finding release in his arms this morning was vivid. The anticipation he felt as he contemplated their next encounter was something he’d never experienced before.
Attraction? Definitely, but love? He grunted. It was a crazy thought but then how insane had the last week been? When would he have ever agreed to protect someone he’d first thought to be a demon in order to escape a Na’Reish dungeon? Or acknowledged the existence of a half-blood Na’Chi? Let alone kiss one?
He ran both hands through his hair, shaking his head. Kymora might be skilled in reading people’s auras and emotions in their voices but how could she claim that he loved Annika when even he wasn’t sure of what he felt for her?
Perhaps it was time he visited the temple and spent some time in prayer to the Lady. He could certainly use a few answers or barring that, any guidance She could provide him with in regards to Annika or the Council.
With a last look toward the balcony and a thought for the pair undergoing lessons carving letters into the ground, Kalan also decided he’d drop in to see a merchant in Bartertown to see about ordering some paper and books for Annika.
ANNIKA quietly closed the door to the apartment, steeling herself for the inevitable encounter with Kalan she’d tried to avoid all day. Spending most of it with Rissa learning the human’s written language had helped but by late afternoon the girl had excused herself to undertake chores.
Turning, Annika surveyed the main room, listening for the sound of someone else in the other chambers. All she could hear was the crackling of the fire over in the grate and the faint murmur of voices outside in the corridor where Light Blade warriors now stood guarding the Lady’s Chosen.
Her nostrils flared at the mouthwatering scent of food. She hadn’t eaten since breakfast. On the table platters, bowls, and plates for a meal had been set at one end. Delivered recently by the look of it. Steam rose through the holes. She hurried over, intending to sneak a look at what lay underneath the covers but a collection of objects at the other end made her detour.
“Lady’s Breath,” she murmured.
Piled carefully in one corner was a small pile of books, all different thicknesses, with gold letters on their front covers. Unable to resist, she picked up the top one and reverently thumbed through its pages.
Next to them lay a stack of paper tablets. Beside them, a stylus, a blank paged journal tied with a leather buckle, bottles of ink. And propped against one of them was a single sheaf of paper. A word and a likeness of her face were drawn on it. Her breath caught.
The note was for her?
Chapter 19
DRAGGING out a chair, Annika set aside the book, and sat down. Her hand shook as she opened the note. Under her breath she tried to sound out the words written on it. Some she managed but many she couldn’t. The very last word on the page took a heartbeat to decipher.
“Kalan.” She bit her lip.
“I thought the paper and books would last longer than letters etched into dirt.”
Annika’s heart leapt in her chest as Kalan’s voice came quietly from behind her. She jerked around in the chair to find him standing in the doorway of his room.
“Rissa makes a good teacher,” he said. The smile he offered her was oddly hesitant as if he was unsure of his welcome.
“You saw us in the garden?” She averted her gaze as her cheeks flooded with warmth.
“Annika, you have nothing to be ashamed of.”
“I don’t live up to your people’s standards.” The words tasted like ash in her mouth.
“I’ve faith you’ll prove them wrong.” His voice was strong and sure. “By week’s end you’ll be reading most of those books.”
Her gaze strayed back to his gift to her. Unbidden, her hand ran over the leather-bound book, enjoying the feel of its smooth cover. She inhaled the dusty, dry smell deeply, pleasure filling her as she detected Kalan’s scent underneath it, as if he’d held each item awhile before placing them on the table.
Such a precious gift. His kindness touched her on a level that erased some of the raw emotions from that morning. She stole a glance at him. His green gaze burned with hunger and also something else she couldn’t identify but it had the power to take her breath away.
She swallowed hard. “No one’s ever given me a gift before.” Her fingers rasped softly over the letter in her hand. “I wish I could read this.”
Half a dozen strides and the tall warrior knelt at her side. Kalan took the sheet an
d spread it on the table. The warmth of his body pressed against her thigh and a few, long strands of hair brushed the side of her arm as he bent to read the letter.
“It says, ‘Blessed is the day I ended up in chains as a prisoner of the Na’Reish, for I met a woman who opened my eyes and captured my heart with her compassion, her strength, and her dream.’ ”
She gasped. He paused and glanced at her. The light in his eyes held a vulnerability she’d never seen before. He continued reading, his voice husky.
“ ‘I should have told you who I was once we were safe out of Na’Reish territory. I know I’ve broken your trust again, and you’re justified in any anger you may feel because of what I’ve done, but I never meant to hurt you. I was a fool.’ ”
Regret and pain shadowed his voice. It made it hard to maintain the sense of betrayal she’d felt for him not telling her who he was. Annika thought herself prepared for an encounter of some sort over the revelations of the day. But not this.
His finger trailed under the last line of writing. “ ‘I’m a fool who values your friendship, one who would help you build a future here with me.’ ”
His soft-spoken words hung between them, held there by the fragile thread of hope. She found herself wanting him to read them again but was afraid to ask. Someone took a ragged breath. And another. And another. Then she realized it was her.
How could a simple letter affect her so much? Throat hurting, she swallowed repeatedly. Where was the ugly sting of betrayal she’d felt most of the afternoon? She wanted to confront him. She wanted an explanation for his hypocrisy. But she didn’t want to lose what they had between them in this moment. Never had she experienced something so precious. Berating him would destroy his words and the intent behind his gift.
“Kalan…” Her voice sounded rusty and hoarse, and on the verge of breaking. She clenched her jaw shut until it ached. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to rage at him or just cry. She just knew she was weak enough to consider forgiving him despite her emotions.
He took her hand in his. Somber, green eyes lifted to lock with hers. “I know you’re probably not ready for any of this, not after today. All I ask is that you think about what I’ve said.”
Vengeance Born (The Light Blade #1) Page 20