Moment of Weakness - The Esquire Girls Series - Hailey (Book 1)

by Miller, Cassie-Ann L.

  “Battle wound, I guess.” A distant look comes across his face like my question has tossed him back into the throes of an unpleasant memory. “Explosion in Basra. The blast was strong enough to pelt me a good few yards backwards into a concrete beam. My shoulder still acts up every now and then.”

  “Oh, shit,” I say softly. “That’s awful.”

  He looks up at me with a light smile on his lips. “I was lucky. Some of my brothers died in that explosion. I’m just lucky to be alive.”

  I don’t know what to say so I don’t say anything.

  We sit in silence for a long while. My eyes begin to flutter shut.

  And that’s the last thing I remember.

  Chapter 14

  When my eyes blink open the next morning, they land on a set of unfamiliar curtains. Alarmed, I bounce upright in my seat and the couch springs squeak loudly. I yank the blankets off of me and notice that my jacket is still on, buttoned all the way up with my scarf around my neck.

  “Hey.”

  My head darts to the left where I see Jackson sitting at his computer desk in all his chiseled, shirtless glory.

  I yank wild strands of hair from my face as I try to piece together the events of last night and figure out how the hell I got here.

  “Good morning, Cowgirl,” Jackson says as he stands to his feet and with the flick of a button, turns on the electric kettle.

  “Good morning,” I mumble groggily as he bends into the mini fridge. His shorts hang loosely on his hips.

  Wow – what an ass.

  “You were out like a light last night,” he says as he sets a bowl of fruit on the counter.

  “I was tired,” I say as I glance around the apartment. It looks different in the glow of the sunlight. “Where did you sleep?” I ask panicking when I notice that the only door in the apartment leads to the washroom. There’s no separate bedroom.

  He nods towards the pile of blankets and pillows on the floor. When his eyes meet mine, he gives me an awkward grin.

  “Aww, man. Now I feel bad. I just showed up at your house in the middle of the night and stole your bed,” I say apologetically as I glance back at the couch where I’m sitting. “Why didn’t you wake me up? I would have gone home.”

  He smiles coyly. “I didn’t want to disturb you. You’re just so damned pretty while you sleep.”

  He moves towards me with a hot cup of tea and a bowl of fruits. He sets them on the table in front of me before sitting on the edge of the couch.

  “You’re blushing,” he remarks as he runs a finger down my heated cheek. Amusement dances in his eyes.

  I feel flustered and tongue-tied. It’s not every day that a man who I feel such raw attraction to calls me ‘damned pretty’. I can’t bring my gaze to his.

  He reaches out and gently holds my face in his hand. “Hailey…you’re pretty. Very pretty.”

  I must be the color of a beet right now. “Thank you,” I say in a small voice as I dare to bring my eyes to his.

  He finally looks satisfied. He stands again. “Okay – I need to go take a shower. I have to be at work soon,” he announces as he moves towards the washroom.

  I nod as I watch him go.

  “Don’t go anywhere, okay? I want you to be here when I get out.”

  I nod again.

  But as soon as the bathroom door closes, I grab my purse and tiptoe out the front door because I’m far too aroused to be left alone with this man. If I have to sit here watching water run down his stone-cut body when he emerges from the bathroom, I’m guaranteed to do something stupid.

  Chapter 15

  “Coral is a pretty color on you, Hails,” Nadia comments as she stands next to me, taking in my reflection in the floor-to-ceiling mirror in front of us.

  “On you, too,” I say distractedly. I’ve been gazing into the mirror for the past few minutes without really seeing anything. Thoughts of Jackson are on repeat in my mind. I keep fantasizing about what could have happened between us last night.

  I could have given in to the urge to run my fingers down his ripped chest.

  He could have kissed me.

  I could have let him fuck me…all night long.

  And I know I did the right thing by playing it cool and keeping my hands to myself, but God knows it was hard.

  I keep having to remind myself that, firstly, Jackson is not my type. As handsome and charming as he may be, he’s not the type of man I planned to be with when I moved to New York City.

  “Are you sure?”

  Nadia’s question rips through my thoughts. “Huh? Am I sure about what?”

  She pushes an exasperated sigh past her lips. ”Are you sure this color looks good on me?” There’s a tinge of irritation on her pretty face.

  I offer a weak smile. “Yes, of course. It’s awesome against your skin tone.”

  She throws me a quick glance over her shoulder as she runs her hands down the satin fabric smoothing out a wrinkle. “What are you so busy thinking about anyway?”

  A part of me is aching to tell someone – anyone about Jackson and the new, strange things he’s making me feel, but the other part wants to keep him a secret all to myself. I don’t want to share these confusing thoughts with anyone.

  Thankfully, Amber waddles into the room at just that moment, an eager bridal shop attendant hot on her heels. She pauses by the door as her eyes scan the dresses that Nadia and I are wearing. She scrunches up her nose. “I don’t like,” she announces flatly.

  “Well, how about we try on these crimson-colored dresses?” the attendant says quickly. She obviously doesn’t want to lose this sale for her small bridal boutique. She shoves a pair of lacy red frocks at Nadia and me. I can tell they’re hideous before I even put mine on. Still, I don’t want to be the one to break it to Amber. She’s a sensitive bride-to-be if I’ve ever seen one.

  Just as I’m about to head back to the dressing room to try on the new dress, Ruthie comes rushing through the door, hair damp with snow. “I’m late. I know. I’m sorry,” she says as she slips out of her winter coat.

  Amber sort of glares at her. “Don’t you dare say you were stuck at work, Ruthie, because I can smell the sex on you from all the way over here. You were with Michael, weren’t you?”

  My roommate looks coy as a blush rushes to her cheeks.

  Nadia laughs, rushing to Ruthie’s defense. “Amber, you can’t fault the girl. She’s got a fine male specimen who lives to give her toe-curling orgasms. If I had a man like Michael, I’d be late, too.”

  Toe-curling orgasms…

  And just like that, my mind is on Jackson again.

  Chapter 16

  It’s 11:15 at night. And I’m trying to figure out why the hell I’m knocking on Jackson’s front door.

  I’m about to pivot quickly on my heel and run away, but I’m too late. The door swings open and he’s standing there, wearing nothing but some dark blue basketball shorts.

  “Hailey?” He’s obviously surprised to see me. Especially after the way I disappeared this morning while he was in the shower.

  “Hey Tough Guy,” I say shyly.

  We stand there for a long moment, both looking at each other but not saying a word.

  He takes me by the hand and gently pulls me toward him. He’s so close I can feel the delicious heat radiating off of his body, making me wild to taste him. He’s so close I can’t think. Resisting the urge to touch him is becoming physically painful.

  He’s aroused. I can see the outline of his erection pressing against the thin fabric of his basketball shorts. He takes a half step closer to me. He leans his forehead against his arm, which is propped against the doorframe.

  Sweet Jesus – he’s tall.

  He drags a finger down the side of my cheek and a shiver moves through me. I glide my tongue across my parched lower lip. I silently wonder if my eyes reveal my wild desire as much as his do.

  I can’t take the tension for one second longer.

  My hands leap to his cheeks an
d pull his face closer to mine. I push to my toes and my lips meet his with an eagerness I’ve never felt before. His mouth is firm and soft. He sucks at my lips and an uninhibited moan escapes me. I a pant softly and his tongue pushes into my mouth. That only spurs him on.

  One hand slides into my hair and the other runs down my back until it’s cupping my buttocks. He holds me tightly to him. “Shit – I want you so bad, Hailey,” he murmurs into my mouth as he lifts me and carries me over to the sofa after kicking the door shut with his foot.

  Primitive sounds pour out of my body as he lays me down and begins to unbutton my jacket. His name tumbles past my lips. My hands explore the ridges and contours of his chest and back. My clit aches for his touch. I’m as wet and sensitive as I’ve ever been in my life.

  The hunger in his kiss should be enough to scare me but I want him just as bad. His lips travel across my cheek and down my neck and into my cleavage. When he yanks down my bra and slips my pebbled nipple into his mouth, I toss my head back and let out a wanton moan.

  My skull smacks into the ceramic lamp on the table and it goes crashing to the floor with a loud clatter, smashing into a million pieces. Startled, Jackson jumps off of me and I nearly come out of my skin.

  “Shit! I’m so sorry!” I feel awful about having broken his lamp.

  “No big deal,” he says as he attempts to climb back on top of me, his eyes glazed over with lust.

  I push him off and he drops onto the sofa with a thud. “I should leave.”

  “Whoa – no, no, no. It’s just a lamp. I’ll clean it up in a second.” He tries to hold me gently by the shoulders.

  I want to stay. I want to give my body to him. But I know that I shouldn’t..

  “I shouldn’t have come here. I’m sorry,” I mutter under my breath as I button up my jacket.

  “Why are you saying that, Hailey? You want me. I can see it all over your face.” He stands in front of me – red-faced with sweat dancing on his brow, biceps flexed, knuckles fisted at his waist and erection slightly lifting the fabric of his pants – the epitome of masculinity.

  “I – I – There’s something I didn’t tell you. I was seeing someone when we met – It ended – I don’t know if I’m over it yet.”

  He takes a step closer and puts his hands on my shoulders. He lowers his lips to my ear. “I can make you forget about him, Hailey.” His words suggest so much. They cause me to shiver again.

  That was the perfect thing for him to say, but accepting his offer wouldn’t be fair to him. “I don’t want this to be a rebound.”

  “Hailey…please…” He runs his finger down my cheek.

  I move out of his grasp taking small footsteps away from him, my eyes never leave his.

  “Stay…” I see in his eyes how much he wishes that I would.

  But I can’t.

  “Good night, Jackson.”

  Chapter 17

  When I walk into the lobby the next afternoon, I catch a glimpse of Jackson from behind. He’s wearing a simple, black leather jacket and dark jeans. His messenger bag is slung across his chest. I quickly realize that his shift is over and he’s preparing to leave for the day.

  I put my head down and hurry through the scant crowd populating the lobby, rushing straight to the elevator. I hit the call button and the door slides open immediately. I thank my lucky stars that I’ve gotten away from him. I’m far too mortified to ever face him again. I don’t know what the hell I was thinking last night. It’s not my style – showing up horny and desperate at some guy’s house in the middle of the night.

  I enter the elevator alone and hit the button for the 7th floor. Just as the doors start to slide shut, a large hand reaches out to stop them.

  Jackson is standing there tall, commanding and green-eyed. “Hailey…” he says my name in a soft growl as he steps onto the lift. I gasp softly at the sound of it. “Come back to my place tonight. Let’s finish what we started.”

  My lips part involuntarily as the elevator commences its climb and I’m struggling to breathe. The small space we’re enclosed in is too compact for the intense sexual energy crackling between us. Still, he takes a step closer.

  “Let me fuck you, Hailey…You want that.”

  I feel the flesh between my legs clench violently.

  He’s always such a perfect gentleman – holding doors for me, getting into cabs just to protect me and not to mention, taking down muggers to retrieve my purse – but seeing this crude, sexual side of him is a serious aphrodisiac.

  “I don’t want that,” I say quietly. The lie burns my throat. The truth is, I want to give my body to him, right here in this elevator. But as Ruthie learned the hard way, what goes on in the elevators of this building doesn’t necessarily stay in the elevators of this building.

  “You’re lying. Don’t do that.”

  I press my back into the side of the lift trying to put as much space as possible between us. Maybe then my brain will start working again. “You and me? It’s a bad idea.”

  Jackson’s hands leap to my hips and pull me close to him. “’You and me’ is a damned good idea, Hailey.” His lips barely graze mine before I turn away from him.

  The elevator screeches to a halt on the 7th floor. I move away from him quickly. The last thing I want is for someone to see us in such an intimate position. I don’t want any gossip being spread around the office.

  He takes a deep breath. “Fine,” he says simply before taking a step backward.

  The doors open and I take my first step off as quickly as I can. I need to get away from this man before my body makes me do something stupid.

  I run headlong into Matt.

  His initial reaction is irritation. He holds me squarely by the shoulders. “Hey. Hey. Slow down,” he says before releasing me to adjust the lapels of his navy blue overcoat. But when he notices Jackson leaning against the back wall of the elevator, his expression changes. Curiosity scrunches at his brows. He glances from me to Jackson and back again.

  I hurry away and don’t look back. Not even when I hear the elevator doors rattle closed.

  Chapter 18

  “So, last week, you call telling me that you walked in on the guy you were sleeping with screwing his secretary. And now, this week, you’re telling me that you’re ready to start screwing some other guy?” I can hear the skepticism and judgment in Kimberly’s voice.

  “Kimmy, don’t twist my words,” I say defensively. “I never said that I’m ready to start screwing him.”

  She pushes a deep breath past her lips. “Hailey, you didn’t have to say it. I know you – if you didn’t want to sleep with him, we wouldn’t have spent the past half hour talking about him. I can practically hear you blushing over the phone.”

  I turn an even deeper shade of red. I tear my gaze away from the cheval mirror leaning against my bedroom wall, too embarrassed to even look at myself. Kimberly knows me too well and she shamelessly uses it against me when I try to be dishonest with her…or with myself.

  “Look, Hailey – I know that you went to New York looking for Prince Charming but you can’t drop your knickers for every guy who tosses a glance in your direction. All you’re gonna end up is pregnant and alone.”

  “You’re being way overdramatic, Kimmy,” I say unconvincingly as I adjust the waist of my flannel pajama pants and sit on the edge of my bed.

  “I’m looking out for you, Hailey,” she says softly. “I love little Billy, but being a young single mom isn’t easy. I don’t want that for you.”

  I sigh. “That’s not gonna happen, Kimmy. Trust me.”

  “If you say so, Love.” I hear her baby start to fuss in the background. She tries to shush him but that doesn’t work. Instead, his cries become louder. “Honey, I’ve gotta go. Looks like somebody needs a diaper change.”

  “Yeah, yeah,” I say. “Go. Give Billy a kiss for me. I love you, Kimmy.”

  “I love you, too, Hailey Bear. Call me on Christmas Day, okay? After your friend, Amber’s wedding.
I’m excited to hear how it goes.” And then, she hangs up the phone.

  Chapter 19

  The tension has been building up in my body.

  It’s that tension that rears its ugly head when a woman craves to be touched by a man. It’s starting to feel like a damn long time since I’ve had a man’s hands on me and I don’t know how much longer I can hold out.