Sylee glanced up and caught me staring at her. I couldn’t believe it when she actually blushed. She appeared a little flustered when I did not look away immediately. My ego enjoyed her reactions to my observing her. I took another drink as I continued to look her up and down. If anything, I did have an attractive mate I could show off, and she was a governor’s daughter at that. All of her “prospects” she’d claimed to have would be furious when they found out that I, a mere assassin, had claimed what they had not been able to. A smirk lifted my lips at that thought. All of a sudden, having a mate didn’t sound so bad if I could have a warm bed every night and make other men jealous.
What was happening to me? It seemed my training was finally kicking back in. My dream had made me weak, and so had she. I needed to pull myself together and go back to being the commander I was charged with being. I couldn’t let this girl get to me. Then I would fail like in my dream. No, I had to be hard, cold. I had survived this long because of my training which had rid me of emotional responses on missions, and in life. It didn’t matter that for a few minutes she had been kinder to me than anyone I had met, even after all I had said and done to her. And it didn’t matter that I wanted her kindness again.
Groaning inwardly, I rushed from the house, slamming the door. I didn’t want to see anyone. My brothers could not see my weakness. I decided I needed a good fight, and there was only one person who could put my head back on straight using his large fists.
When I reached the pond, I called out to my most ruthless uncle. “Marcus?”
I knew the magic of the forest would carry my call to Marcus, and he would come as quickly as he could.
******
It was late when my fight with Marcus ended. It had been the exact thing I needed to clear my mind and soul of the day’s events. Jeff had come to the pond to heal me of my broken ribs, shattered knee cap, and concussion after Marcus had left. Jeff was a healer and could have me back on my feet in minutes.
I spent the next hour meditating like my Aunt Mercy had taught me. She told me all the time that a clear head was more important than anything else when a mission went south. I didn’t know if this mission was categorized under “south”, but I figured with all that had happened, I could use all the clear headedness I could get.
When I returned from the pond, I was ready to get back to work. My dream had made me weak and had not been real. My mate had been kind, but that would get her nowhere. I would not be lulled into trusting a person that was not my team, someone I did not know at all. I trusted my brothers with my life. I did not trust her that way, so I would keep my distance and only do things that would protect her.
Laughter rang through the air as I reached the little house. It was late. Why was everyone still awake? Then I remembered the campfire Dalton had mentioned. No doubt that was the reason they were all lively, but this was not a vacation. Their lives depended on making better choices. My brothers knew that. We had one more day left at Bard’s. It needed to be used wisely, not sleeping because they stayed up too late.
Walking to the campfire, I took the bucket of water next to it and dumped the entire contents on the fire, extinguishing it, and sending smoke curling into the air.
“What was that?” Archer yelled.
“It’s time for bed. Go. Now,” I ordered the crowd.
“No way! We were having fun,” Isla argued. “Dad, can’t we stay up?”
“Your father is not in charge here, Ms. Hamilton. I am. You respect your father’s position with the Light, now respect mine. Your family is here for one reason only: your lives are in danger. My job is to keep you alive. I am not here to coddle, or make this a pleasant trip. I am here to do my job. End of story.” When I was done, the child had tears forming in her eyes again. When I got back to Borgman I was putting in a lengthy complaint, I meant report, about this job.
Leaving Isla, I moved to stand in front of the Governor. “Your family promised to obey me no matter what. It is your job to make sure they do, or they can find their own way through the forest.” By the end of my speech my voice was a low growl, and the Governor had taken a step back.
“Ruby, Archer, Sylee, Isla, and Paul, we promised to follow Commander Lanshay’s orders. He thinks we need sleep, so we’ll go quietly and do as he says. He’s charged with keeping us alive. Let him do it,” Governor Hamilton spoke the words to his family and I could tell he did not mean disrespect to me when he said them.
“Fine,” Archer mumbled back. Isla didn’t even say a word. She just walked to the house.
I glanced over at Bard, who had remained quiet, sitting on a log. He wore disappointment like a cloak. It covered every inch of him. Next to him, Sylee frowned and her shoulders sagged. She probably thought she was getting through to me. Women always tried to fix men. I didn’t need fixing. I was just fine the way I was, and she was alive because of it.
I made sure all, except Bard, had headed to the house before following. Sylee sat at the table when I entered. The last of my brothers were ascending the ladder to the loft. The Hamilton’s were already in the loft, the kids grumbling about the extinguished campfire.
“Time for bed,” I told Sylee as I passed.
“I’m not tired yet,” Sylee whispered back. I fisted my hands at her objection. Why did I bond with this woman? Oh yeah, I needed to keep her safe. It was my duty.
“Then lay in bed, but get over here,” I ordered as I crawled in bed. I would not tolerate her disobedience again, and after fighting Marcus, my body was tired. I was in a terrible mood, and she would not like to see evidence of it. At this point, anything would set me off. I needed sleep badly. Why couldn’t she just obey me?
“Not yet, Commander. I’m not tired. I’ll be there when I am.” She tried to say it as nicely as possible.
“Sylee, you are my mate. I will have you come to bed with me. Do not make me ask again, and do not, I repeat, do not, make me carry you to bed,” I said with venom in my voice and eyes of ice.
“Commander.” Sylee stood and walked to the bed. “I am only doing this because I do not want my siblings to see me treated this way anymore, and I do not want my father to come down here and put you in line.”
I snorted. Like her father could put me in line when he couldn’t even stand his ground during a reprimand. I recalled how he had stepped back after my few sentences to him at the fire. He was not weak. Only an elemental would not have cowered from me in my mood out there.
Sylee kept her head high as she climbed onto the bed beside me. “Do not touch me, Commander. I consented to come to your bed, but I will not have you touch me when you are being so foul. That goes for every night after this as well. You may be my husband, or mate, or whatever you called it, but until you begin to act the part, I will not let you have any part of me, even if it is just my warmth.”
“Fine.” My blood boiled with anger. It took a long time for it to change to a simmer, and even longer to completely calm. Finally, I slept.
******
I woke early. Sylee was still asleep, so I crawled over her and went outside to meditate again. Adam and Chris joined me soon after. I had decided not to reprimand my brothers for the late night. They were already very aware I had not approved of it. Reprimands were saved for larger, more disastrous offenses.
“We’re going to head back out,” Adam said when their meditating session ended. “We disposed of a dozen witches yesterday. The rest should be farther into the forest than we are by now. We’re not going to go near the center, though. No use letting the creatures know that there are more than witches here.”
“Agreed. Come back early to rest and eat. We leave at dawn tomorrow. The rest of us will spend the day training,” I replied.
“Glad I’ll be out in the forest. Wouldn’t want to be here for that,” Chris quipped.
As they left, I called through our mental link to the rest of my brothers to come outside. We spent the morning taking turns sparring. Each of us received multiple bruises and a few brok
en bones. We never took it easy on one another. We couldn’t afford to. Our lives depended on keeping our skills sharp.
The Hamilton’s spent the morning with Bard, learning of the forest, helping him with yard work, or cleaning the house. Governor Hamilton even had them take breaks to spar against each other, earning him points with me.
They tried to stay out of my way, while I, on the other hand, kept a watchful eye on them. I had decided during the sleepless hours of the night that I needed to know more about each one, and how they functioned as a unit. Then I could use their strengths to aid our trip.
So far, I had learned that while the Governor was the head of the family, everyone went to Ruby for permission and advice. Paul and Isla were the talkers in the family, and they did it with volume. They also argued the most. Paul loved the attention and could get Isla into trouble in mere minutes from his antics. He was like a Chris Jr. This did not please me, and I hoped Paul would keep it under control when we left Bard’s.
Archer and Sylee spent most of their time helping each other, and I could tell they were close. That was most likely why he came to her aid so frequently. He needed to stop, though, or I would do something his sister would not like if my blood pressure rose again from a demand he made.
After lunch, my brothers and I did the best we could to plan our way through the forest. We decided to go straight through instead of going around the center. Eventually, the larger, deadlier creatures there would learn of our presence and come after us anyway. Then it wouldn’t matter where we were in the forest. It was best, we thought, to hurry through the center and get out faster. Through our mental link, we received information from Adam and Chris to add to our plans. The witches were causing demons to venture from the center, but not in numbers my brothers and I couldn’t handle. I hated waiting, but I wanted to leave when we had the most daylight.
When our planning session ended, I had my brothers spar with the Hamilton’s. I had watched them during the morning to gage their skills. Archer and Sylee, of course, were better than their siblings, but overall I was pleased with their skill levels. While observing the spars, I would interrupt to correct a misplaced foot, a jab that should have been higher, or suggest a move they could have done instead. Isla and Paul were more welcoming of my advice than their siblings.
I took the time to irritate my mate as much as possible with a slight touch to her arm to lower a punch or fixing her stance. She tried to hide how much my touches angered her, but I was good at reading people. Truth be told, though, she was an excellent fighter. Her speed was faster than any human I had faced, and she was strong and graceful. If we were ever to have children, big if, they would be excellent warriors. I didn’t mind dwelling on the thought of giving the Light such fine assets. I would just have to convince their future mother, somehow.
At dinner, I told the Hamilton’s our plan and sent everyone to bed early. Adam and Chris had returned a few hours before dinner, and had each gotten a nap in. They were the only ones to put up a fuss, which I squelched quickly. The Hamilton’s were each too tired from sparring to say much.
Sylee was asleep when I went to bed. Since she had not given me permission to touch her, I faced the window and spent time staring outside while my mind kept playing through so many scenarios for the coming days. The worst were the images from my dream. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t forget her screams and my feeling of uselessness. What confused me wasn’t that I had failed my mission, but that I had failed her. It took me a long while to fall asleep.
Sometime in the middle of the night, I was roused by familiar voices talking at the table.
“I’m so frustrated, Bard. He’s back to being a jerk. I wish he hadn’t shown me how nice he could be,” Sylee spoke. I figured that the “he” they were discussing was myself, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear what they had to say. I suppressed the urge to cover my ears, but that would expose my wakefulness.
“Oh, child, I’m sorry. I’m afraid he does not want attachments, even a mate. The only relationship he cares about is that of his team. Thankfully, they are also his brothers, so he can be close to them. If his brothers were not his team, he would care about his relationship with them about as much as he cares for his relationship with you.” I had to admit he was right.
“But why is he like this? What kind of parent would let their child grow up to be like him? They must be wonderful,” Sylee ended sarcastically.
“They do not know their father, and their mother had them trained, and mostly raised, by her brothers. Their mother’s family is just like the boys. Duty matters more than feelings and attachment. The boys will make sure your family arrives safely because you are their mission, but that does not mean they will treat any of you with kindness, or tolerance, and do not even hope for respect. As you’ve found, they can be vicious with their words and actions, though honestly, you have witnessed little of how they can act.” Bard’s tone was somber.
“I’m afraid I will see how horrible Carmon can act. I am tied to him forever, after all,” Sylee’s voice sounded like a despondent sigh.
“I guess you will, child. I’m sorry.” Bard’s chair scraped the floor as he stood. He paused, “May I ask a favor of you, Little One?”
Sylee must have nodded because Bard continued, “Please be patient with him. He is a dominant male who has been given a lot of responsibility at a very young age. He has been a commander since the time he was fourteen, not even a legal adult. I’m not saying this to excuse his actions. Lords and Ladies know he does not deserve excuses, and I’m not asking you to let him have his way. I just don’t want you to write him off yet. I may be disappointed in him, but I still have hope he can change. I’m asking you to also have that hope.”
“I’ll try Bard, but what if he never changes? What am I going to do? I wanted a family, a husband, children, and even a dog or two. I dreamed of a loving husband who would care for me, and I for him, into our old age. He most likely hasn’t even thought about children, or our future together. He probably plans to just drop me at Mount Pickett and never speak to me again.” Sylee whispered the last sentence to herself.
“Please do not give up hope. There is still time before you reach Mount Pickett for him to change, or at least begin to.”
Changing the subject, Sylee asked, “What’s so bad out there that he felt he needed to ruin my life?”
Bard sighed and walked back to the table. “Your mate feels he is doing you a service by not telling you what awaits. I, however, feel differently. Your bond with him has given you protections, never doubt that, and he is also not wrong about your scent. You need to smell like him. This stops the smaller evil creatures in the forest from attacking you. That you are bonded to him deters the medium creatures.”
“And the large ones?”
Bard sighed. “The bond will not deter them.”
“Then, why do it? I’m sure he could fight off little creatures. Heck, I’m sure they would happily run away from him in fear with only a command. Why bond with me if it wasn’t going to help. Why is Carmon so worried about me, anyway? What about the rest of my family? What about Isla?” Sylee asked.
“He will not want me to tell you this, but I feel it would be a disservice for you not to know. The larger creatures in the forest have the ability to bond with you like Carmon did.” I heard Sylee gasp. “To be bonded to one of them would mean a lifetime of more misery and pain than even Carmon could inflict upon you. You would never see your family again, if the creature didn’t kill them before bonding with you.” Bard took a few seconds to let his words sink in. “They want you because you are a young, innocent woman. Your sister is not yet of age, or I’m sure one of the other brothers would have bonded with her.”
“If I’m bonded, why is Carmon still worried? Why did you say the bond won’t deter them?”
Bard released a big gust of air from his lungs. “The creatures can still bond with you. Carmon has made that harder to do, but it could still be possible in c
ertain circumstances.”
“How can they still bond with me? What circumstances would allow that?” Sylee interrupted.
“Carmon’s death.”
Chapter Four
Sylee
“What?!” No way. No flippin’ way!
“You can only be bonded to one being at a time,” Bard explained to me, though I’d figured that part out. “The only way the creatures can bond with you is to kill Carmon. That is why I ask you to not give up on him, and help him learn to love. He knew the moment he bonded with you that he might die because of it, but it added another layer of defense for you, so he did it. Even if it was his choice, he still sacrificed his ability to choose another mate, and potentially his life, for you. I’m not saying you must submit to him in everything, but please do so when your safety is in question. Stay by him in the forest. He will not let you be harmed.”
“Why would he do that? He didn’t even know me.” I kept my voice soft so I didn’t wake up the subject of our conversation. Sleep seemed to improve his mood, and after the last couple of days, it could use all the improving it could get.
“He would say duty, but I say it’s because he has a softer, kinder heart than even he realizes.” I don’t know how Bard had so much optimism about Carmon. He was so hot and cold, but mostly cold.
“I feel like a bit of a jerk for being so mean to him when he could die because of me.” And I did feel bad. A little.
“Don’t,” Bard responded coolly. “He is not worthy of your pity. I love the boys, but even I can say Carmon is not worthy of your love or kindness toward him. He is hardly worthy of the hope I asked you to have, or the patience you will need with him, and he is by far not worthy of a mate, but since it is done, he will need to work on that.”
Life and Water: The Elementals: Book One Page 6