Thirty-Eight Reasons

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Thirty-Eight Reasons Page 24

by Len Webster


  Noel's my choice.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  Liam: Meet me at the bakery.

  There was no ‘welcome home’ or ‘sweetheart’ message and Clara felt the worry rise within. Biting her lip, she reread the five-worded message again. With no possible clues at what to expect, she locked her phone and placed it on her lap.

  Watching Noel wipe those tears away broke her and wore her down to making a choice. Calling Liam during her stop over in Singapore made that choice redundant. The flight from Sydney to Melbourne had her undecided. Sitting in the back of the taxi, she rubbed her eyes and hoped maybe seeing Liam would finally give her the courage to break someone's heart, even if it meant her own.

  The taxi stopped and she breathed out, knowing she’d have to face Liam.

  “Thank you,” she said and handed over the fare. Clara opened the taxi door and stepped onto the concrete sidewalk with her luggage in hand.

  Her eyes roamed the white bakery and felt the instant bile start to rise. It was a sight she never expected. It felt like a lifetime ago since she was in front of the bakery, but it had only been just over a week. The grip she had on her suitcase handle slipped and it fell to the ground with a moderate bang. There was no temptation to pick it up. Her eyes watered at the sight of her bakery.

  Closing her eyes, she prayed to the universe before opening her eyes again. The sight didn’t vanish. Black sheets hung from inside of the bakery, obscuring prying eyes into the once visible shop. Every single window was covered, the flower boxes that once lined the windows were gone and outdoor chairs and tables were nowhere in sight. Looking up the building ‘The Little Bakery’ sign was no longer bolted above the door.

  “No,” she whispered. Swallowing the large lump in her throat, she bent her knees and picked up her suitcase. “It can’t be,” she chanted several times and shook her head.

  Walking a few steps, she stopped in front of the once white painted doors to find the paint had been sanded down. The sign in front of her had Clara blinking several times.

  CLOSED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.

  The struggle to breathe grew fierce as the reality of the sign hit her, completely and utterly surprising Clara. The bakery was closed. The only time it closed was for Christmas and Easter. The removal of the bakery sign and the black sheets covering the windows only confirmed the ache in her heart.

  I’m losing the bakery.

  It was a concept she didn’t want to believe. Liam couldn’t have sold the bakery so quickly but with the lure of such an area, it would sell instantly. Movement caught her eye and she saw the black sheet covering the door move slightly. Liam looked at her; those hazel eyes were darker than she last remembered. Clara took a step back as he opened the door and stepped on the black sidewalk. He didn’t pull her in for a kiss or greet her, his face expressionless. Her eyes roamed the building and her eyes started to sting.

  “I’ll buy the bakery from you,” she uttered after she placed her suitcase back on the ground.

  “Clara.” His voice was tight and controlled.

  “No, you can’t sell it. Please, Liam. I’ll pay double what you paid,” she begged.

  His eyebrows shot up and the surprise succumbed his face.

  “I paid over eight hundred thousand,” he stated.

  Clara did the math in her head, including taxes and transfer fees it would cost her close to one-point-nine-million-dollars. The total figure sent her heart plunging.

  “That’s a lot of money,” Liam pointed out.

  A tear fell and she quickly wiped it away, knowing she’d have to sell her soul for the bakery.

  She let out a defeated sigh, and instantly regretted what she would say next. “I have that kind of money.”

  “What?” Liam said, surprised.

  “I can afford the bakery. Name your price and I’ll pay it.”

  The surprise on his face faded as he frowned.

  “Almost two million dollars, Clara? How do you have that kind of money?” He sounded hurt.

  “I have three trust funds. Two of them have clauses that let me invest the money into projects after I turn eighteen. I can’t access the one my father set up until I’m twenty-one. Let me talk to my father’s lawyer and have my trust funds looked at, just please don’t sell the bakery. If I can’t get my trust money let me ask the bank. I have enough for a loan, I hope.” She was begging and pleading. The bakery was where so many firsts happen that she couldn’t imagine not owning it.

  Liam’s body stiffened. “You have trust funds? How much money are we talking?”

  Averting his stare, she felt her hands sweat and she fiddled with her fingers. “Almost six million dollars,” she revealed.

  “Six… million… dollars?” Liam uttered out.

  “Yes,” she confirmed and a smile spread across his face. A cold wind blew and Clara involuntary shivered, it was much cooler in Melbourne than it was in New Haven.

  Liam stepped forward, bent down and took her suitcase. His smile confused her and he took her hand. The first thing she noticed was the difference in his touch. Liam felt off and his behaviour with her was unlike him. He led her to the door and dropped the suitcase and with his free hand he opened the bakery doors. The black sheets that covered the windows made the bright bakery eerily dark. This wasn't what she ever imagined for her bakery, she knew she had to beg Liam to sell it to her.

  The moment he let go of her hand, she heard the door close, removing the small amount of light from entering the bakery. She stood there in the darkness until she heard her suitcase being placed down.

  “Surprise!” People shouted out loud in unison before bright lights blinded her eyes.

  Her hands quickly rose to cover eyes, she heard the sounds of rushing footsteps and then she was being hugged tightly.

  “Clara!” Annie’s voice squealed.

  Clara she couldn’t move her hands to see her. Arms tighten around her and she felt herself being completely squashed.

  “I think we’re suffocating her.” Jarred’s voice called to her.

  Her lips formed a smile at his voice, she missed him and realised that she spent weeks distancing herself from him. He was there when she ended it with Noel, his judgment on her she valued.

  “Please,” she choked out before the pressure around her left. Moving her hands, she controlled her breathing and took in the air her lungs needed, but kept her eyes closed.

  “Surprise, sweetheart! Open your eyes,” Liam said, his arm wrapped around her.

  Slowly, fearful of the incoming sight, she opened her eyes. All breath left her as she took in the sight of the bakery.

  “Oh my God,” she breathed out. Clara turned her head and took in the sight and familiar faces with her scan.

  “You like it?” Liam whispered in her ear.

  She couldn’t respond she was utterly speechless.

  “How?”

  Liam’s touch left her and he stood in front of Clara. His hazel eyes made her realise just how innocent he was. Perfection looked at her and it killed her inside.

  “I wanted to surprise you and you left the list of your plans in the study. Your blue prints weren’t that hard to find. I asked Danny to close the place down so I could have the tradies come in and renovate the place. I hope it’s everything you ever wanted.”

  The hope in his voice and face had Clara smiling.

  The old décor was replaced with a French theme. Whites and pastel colours filled the shop floor and she spotted booths towards the back of the bakery.

  “Does that say cakes?” Clara pointed at a glass display. Each display would fit a four-tier cake.

  “I told him you’d like that display much better for cakes. The macaron bar was Jarred’s idea. But those booths being towards the back was Josie’s,” Danny said as he pointed around the room.

  The faces that filled the room made her smile but at the same time people were missing.

  “Where are Rob and Max?” she asked.

  Behind Liam she
noticed Stevie shaking her head at her question.

  “They couldn’t make it, sorry, sweetheart.”

  I have my dream bakery but I don’t have my two friends… I don’t have Noel.

  The beaming smile from Liam caused an internal sob. She was in too deep. This surprise party just shot the plan to end her engagement to hell.

  “Clary!” a little voice shrieked.

  She watched a little blonde girl run to her. Clara bent her knees and scooped up CeCe in her arms as the tears that brimmed her eyes fell.

  “Hello, pretty girl,” Clara struggled out.

  CeCe wrapped her arms around Clara’s neck.

  “I missed you,” CeCe said against her neck.

  “She’s been looking for you,” Ally said as she walked over to them.

  Clara managed a smile and nodded her head. There were no words she could form. The sight of Liam, Ally, and CeCe reminded her of what made her stay for all those months. Her heart knew that there was no way back to Noel. That idea of leaving Liam came with consequences and it took coming back to realise what they were.

  “I think it’s time we celebrate the fact that my son's finally landing an amazing girl,” Liam’s father, David, said loudly.

  Her eyes couldn’t meet David's. There was so much shame that filed Clara’s mind and chest. The realisation was making it difficult for her to breathe. Fearful she’d drop CeCe, Clara handed her to Liam. Her head felt incredibly light and for a second she thought she’d faint.

  “I had no idea your parents were coming this early,” she managed to say.

  “Oh yeah, they came to surprise you. Mother’s been staring at your wedding dress ever since she landed yesterday. Don’t worry, I haven’t looked.” Liam winked.

  The thought of her wedding dress made her sick.

  “Sienna!” Liam waved her over. It had been months since Clara saw Liam’s best friend.

  “Clara, so good to see you. I’m so glad to hear that your brother is doing well. He’ll make it to the wedding, right?” Sienna asked as she swirled the straw in her glass.

  The wedding.

  Countless pairs of eyes met hers, drawing her for an answer. Her throat tightened and the room felt small around her.

  “Yes,” she croaked out, instantly regretting the word that left her mouth. That one word sealed her fate, there would be no future with Noel.

  Her eyes met with Stevie’s who’s brimmed with tears. Because in that moment Stevie understood what Clara had just decided.

  ⌘

  Looking at the paper in front of her, she felt pieces of herself start to crumble. A confession of her love written down in words that would never be read. When she stood at the mailbox at the post office, she realised she couldn’t mail it. Liam’s surprise engagement party hijacked her. There was no way she could end her engagement in front of all of Liam’s family. Looking around the room filled with almost a hundred people, the sight unnerved her. In comparison to all of Liam’s loved one’s Clara had next to none.

  In total she had five guests: Stevie, Annie, Jarred, Danny and Josie. There was no Rob or Max. There was no one else. The realisation had Clara running to Jo for the guest list. Add in her brother and Keira, Clara had seven guests to her own wedding. Her parents refused to attend, and Max and Rob still hadn’t made a choice. She knew their loyalty wasn't hers to claim.

  There would be close to two hundred guests and only seven of those were Clara’s. Placing the papers down, she picked up Noel’s invitation. He promised that if she chose Liam he’d attend, but part of her wanted him to come and steal her away. She could run away with Noel but the unfairness of inviting him had her placing the envelope down. In the two days since her arrival back in Melbourne Clara had regretted every decision she had made.

  Picking up Noel’s letter, she read it one last time before she folded it and placed it in a purple envelope. She leaned into the wooden chair of the office Liam set up while she was away and sighed. There was no doubt that Liam made her happy, but it wasn’t the same. It wasn’t until Liam spoke of her so fondly and spoke so lovingly about her that she willingly accepted a life with him. He would be proud of her and she didn’t want to be selfish when it would hurt him.

  Part of her hated herself but another part told her that she had made her bed long ago and now had to lie in it. She’d have lost the bakery, Liam, Ally and CeCe. They were as close to a family for her. They took her in and accepted Clara. She could love Liam, but at the same time she knew it wasn’t the love he wanted off her. One week and six days until her wedding. If there was a time to run, it had to be soon. The only problem: for the first time in her life, Clara had no idea how to run.

  “You coming to bed?” Liam asked behind her.

  Clara turned and smiled at the sight of him. His shirt was unbuttoned and his hair ruffled. He didn’t deserve to have his heart broken. She wouldn’t allow herself to do that.

  “Yeah,” Clara replied. Picking up Noel’s envelopes, she opened the drawer to her left and placed them under a bundle of paper. Closing the drawer, Clara’s choice felt cemented. Two envelopes that she had no idea if she’d send or not, but she’d let Noel know of her choice. It would break her and leave her hallow inside but Noel deserved someone better than her.

  “Are you packed?” Clara asked as she stood up from the chair and walked towards him.

  “Yeah. Can’t wait to go on this bachelor party; this is going to be insane! You sure you don’t want to go to some resort or another country for your bachelorette party?” Liam asked sweetly before he brought her into his arms.

  Clara shook her head. “No, I’d rather not. The hot springs is what I want. I wish you’d tell me where you’re going.”

  Liam kissed her cheek and shook his head. “Sorry, Clara, but this one I’m keeping from you. The boys want this to be a complete bachelor party!” There was something off about what he said. He wasn’t as excited as he tried to project but she ignored it.

  Resting her head against his chest, Liam’s heartbeat sounded strong against her ear. He was always the strong one and the one she depended on. The though that she could ruin him had her accepting the marriage she would be entering.

  “You be good,” she teasingly warned.

  Liam placed his hand on the back of her head and held her tighter, his chin resting on the top of her head.

  “You love me, right?”

  She tensed at his innocent question.

  Wrapping her arms around his waist, Clara nodded into his chest. “Of course I do,” she replied honestly. It was true, she loved Liam, always would. But the fearlessness that came with loving Noel didn’t overtake her when it came to loving Liam.

  “I love you, Clara,” Liam whispered.

  It almost sounded like a goodbye, tainted with so much sadness that Clara’s eyes started to sting.

  “The Lyndon account has been secured and they’re open for us to do business with them for the next five years,” Gregson stated as he moved his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

  Noel nodded and fiddled with his pen.

  “Miss Wallace, I trust you won’t let me down and draw up a new contract,” Gregson said without looking at Andrea.

  Looking at Andrea from across the table, Noel saw the twitch in her lip. He offered a smile and she relaxed.

  “Yes, sir,” Andrea said with no arguments.

  Gregson looked up with a raised eyebrow. The smirk on Andrea’s face had Noel internally laughing.

  The meeting continued to drag on as he sat uncomfortably in his seat. The boardroom was filled with all the major players of the Boston office of G&MC. But his head wasn’t in it, instead he thought about Clara. One week and four days until her wedding day and he still hadn’t heard a word from her.

  Another twenty minutes into the lifeless meeting he felt his phone vibrate. Not caring about being caught he took out his phone and his heart stopped mid-beat. Clara’s name appeared on the screen of his phone. Swiping his thumb across the s
creen, he opened her message.

  Clara: I’m sorry, Noel. I don’t know how to find a way to you without breaking his heart. I’m so sorry.

  He felt the sudden burst of anger in him. It couldn’t be. He shouldn’t have let her go without expressing her love. If she said those words, she wouldn’t be returning to Liam. The pressure in his chest had him out of his seat.

  “Mr. Parker, where’s the emergency?” The hint of irritation was in Gregson’s stern voice.

  “I’m about to lose the love of my life!” Noel blurted out.

  Everyone in the boardroom looked over at Andrea.

  Raising her hands, she shook her head and said, “Don’t look at me. I’m not the love of his life.”

  Eyes darted back over to him and he gave Andrea an appreciative smile.

  “We’re in a middle of an important meeting, Mr. Parker. I suggest you sit down. A senior accountant up for promotion would know better than to leave a meeting like this,” Gregson stated before he looked down at the file in front of him and continued with the meeting.

  Countless pairs of eyes looked at him and Noel shook his head.

  “Screw the promotion! I couldn’t give a shit about it. God knows I wouldn’t get it. Give it to someone else and demote me if you like. The woman I love is about to marry some other man and I’ve sat back and let it happen. I’m getting her back for good this time.” He didn’t wait for Gregson to reply. Noel walked out of the boardroom unsure if he had a job to return to.

  He stalked through the stairwell doors. Adrenalin from telling Gregson to shove it coursed through his veins. He was stupid for letting her go. Clara was beyond doubtful and one smile from Liam and she would accept his hand in marriage.

  Steadying against the metal railing of the stairs, he dialed Clara’s number. He heard the international dial before regular rings began. With each second that past he felt her slipping away.

  “Hey, you’ve reached Clara. Sorry I—” Noel hung up at the sound of her voicemail message.

  “No! You can’t do this to me, Clara,” he yelled as he redialed her number. Looking at his watch he knew it was three a.m. back in Melbourne but he didn’t care. He was sick of her games and wanted it to end between them.

 

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