Thirty-Eight Reasons

by Len Webster

  “They could be happy with each other,” Noel stated.

  Taking her eyes away from the sight of Liam, Clara looked at Noel and shook her head.

  “No.”

  “No?” Noel frowned and looked at Sienna and Liam again.

  “Not Sienna. When Liam asked me to imagine myself getting married, I did imagine you, but I also imagined him getting married. It wasn't to me and it wasn't to Sienna.” She took her eyes off of Noel's frown and looked at her ex-fiancé. “I'm the woman that ruins him,” she uttered.

  “Don't say that!” Noel defended.

  Clara let out a laugh.

  “No, I am. I'm the woman that messes him up. I'm the one he's with last before he meets 'The One'. I'm the one that leaves him broken for the next woman. I make him hate and lose faith in love so that she can come and make him believe all over again. Liam saved me, but this time, Liam's the one that needs to be saved and that woman will do it. She'll show him what love is really like. She'll love him the right way. It's time someone showed him that he's truly worth being rescued.”

  Noel stepped in front of her and focused on her. “Don’t do that to yourself, Clara. You saved Liam and showed him that all it takes is one woman to make you fall in love. You showed me that.”

  She smiled instantly at his loving words. In two weeks they’d be off to New York for Christmas. Back when they were in the States, they went to Boston for the weekend and she fell instantly in love with Brookline. The streetcars reminded her of the trams back in Melbourne and her heart was set on Brookline. Washington Square was her favourite it reminded her of the old village center that she grew up in back in the suburbs. For now they’d rent an apartment until they found a house together. She did spot a house she loved that was on sale, but Clara would wait until she officially moved to Boston to decide on a house.

  “I got a job offer,” she said before he could say anything else.

  “Take it! I’ll call Gregson and we’ll stay here.”

  Clara let out a laugh and shook her head. “No, I got a job offer in the South End.”

  “In Boston?” His eyes were wide in disbelief.

  “Danny got me a few interviews and Mistral wanted to hire me for the dessert intern position.” The utter joy in his eyes made her heart leap.

  “So we’re really doing this? We’re really going to have a life together in Boston?” he asked.

  Clara squinted at him. “Don’t you dare back out, Nolan Parker. We are in this together.”

  He let out a heart-warming chuckle, his eyes sparkling at her. “I have some news too.”

  “Go on,” she urged.

  “That house you like in Brookline, it’s ours.”

  “Ours?” she breathed out.

  “Working for G&MC and my promotion put me in good position with the bank for a loan.”

  She knew how expensive the house was but she didn’t care. The moment she turned twenty-one it would be paid off in one transaction. She would use her trust funds she was going to use for the bakery on the house they’d own together.

  We have a house and a life together.

  “Question nineteen,” he said, pulling her out of the daydream she had of their lives together.

  “Would you come for a drive with me?”

  She raised her eyebrows at him. If it was to get her alone and to be intimate then she was all in. Looking up at her brother, she saw him shrug. Her eyes met Liam’s and he looked sad, the smile he gave her was forced.

  “Okay,” she agreed.

  “It’s a long drive. We’re going to a few places.”

  ⌘

  Alex’s Mustang stopped outside of a home she knew so well. It was a long drive from the city to their childhood suburb. The bricked house was one she frequently visited as a child and she smiled at the memories. Her side door opened and Noel held out his hand. Taking it, she stepped out of the car and looked over at the Parker family home.

  “Where are you taking me?” she asked as he led her to the side gate.

  “Just wait and see.” Noel reached up and unlocked the wooden gate. He led her into the garden and she could see their childhood play out in front of her.

  Walking past the deck, she remembered the little boy in his baseball cap and she smiled at herself. He stopped her at the edge of the garden and she looked at the very spot they were at over sixteen years ago.

  “I want you to see some of our spots before you move to Boston.” Noel dug his hand in his pocket and took out a small card.

  He handed it to her and she opened it.

  This is the spot where one tulip started it all for us. Little did I know that, years later, I would fall madly in love with you. This is the spot where I helped a little girl smile with just one purple tulip. This is the spot that started our story.

  Her heart melted at this one card. Her eyes prickled at the thought of this very spot. Noel bent down and pulled out one of his mother’s tulips. Like he did over sixteen years ago, he shook the dirt off and broke off the roots before handing it to her.

  He didn’t let her say a word as he kissed her softly before taking her hand and leading her away from that one memorable spot.

  “Where are we going now?” she asked curiously, clutching the single tulip and card in her hand.

  “We have two more stops.”

  ⌘

  Clara took in the smell of the salty air and the cool breeze. It was just after two p.m. when they made it to Chelsea beach. Being a Wednesday, there wasn’t many on the beach. She turned her head to see a content smile on Noel’s face.

  She remembered the day they spent at Chelsea. It was the day after she gave him her virginity. It was the day they took pictures that she wished she hadn’t burned. But at the time it was necessary. Taking her hand, he walked her down a sand dune and towards the shoreline. He wrapped his arms around her and they stared out at the ocean.

  Resting her cheek against his chest, she closed her eyes and got lost in the moment. His heart beat so strong. Looking up, the love in his eyes had her content with her choices.

  “What did you say to Liam?”

  The smile on his face quickly vanished and she knew she ruined the moment.

  “I told him of the life I wanted with you, that I’d spend the rest of my life trying to make you happy. I told him that I wouldn’t hurt you again and that I could provide for you.” The honesty in his voice was clear and in this moment he sounded like he was promising her too. His arms tightened around her before he stepped back.

  He reached into the other pocket of his dress pants and handed her another card. Clara opened it.

  This is the beach you told me for the first time that you believed me. The same beach we spent a flawless day together. This is the same beach that I promised that I had every intention of making you happy for the rest of your days. It’s a promise I’m never going to break. I want to make you happy, simply forever.

  “Noel,” she whispered. This time tears slid down her face. She remembered him promising to count every grain of sand on the beach they stood on if it would make her happy. She held the card against her chest and he kissed the top of her head.

  “We’ve got one more stop left.” The nervous smile on his face made him look vulnerable.

  She nodded at him. These spots were ones she would miss in Boston, but seeing them one last time made her heart melt at his effort.

  ⌘

  The car ride from Chelsea beach to Eastern beach took almost an hour and a half. By the time they arrived it was late afternoon and hardly anyone was on the boardwalk except for some joggers. During the car ride, Noel said little as he focused on driving. Clara didn’t mind. She held the two cards and the tulip. She reread the cards and felt herself love him more for each word he wrote.

  “Last stop, Clara.”

  He held out his hand and she threaded her fingers with his, pressing her body close to his as they walked on to the boardwalk. The sun was still high and wouldn’t set for a while. But i
n this moment she was ridiculously happy. Though she’d miss these spots around Victoria, she’d happily give them up for him.

  The wind blew and she snuggled into his arm. “I love you, Noel,” she said as her right hand wrapped around his arm.

  He squeezed her hand. “I love you too, Clara.”

  When they reached the white diving tower she smiled at the sight of it. She was no longer scared of it because of him. One of her favourite memories was of him jumping off with her. Noel led her up the white steps and she smiled when she reached the top. Letting go of Noel’s hand, she looked around at the beauty that surrounded her. She took a step forward and looked over the edge.

  She could see it as if it were a projection in front of her. Noel never letting her hand go as they jumped off the platform and entered the water. The embrace afterwards was one she often thought of. Her eyes welled up at the happy moments they shared. Noel had taken her to three of her favourite spots in the world. She couldn’t wait to start a life with him in a new city.

  She felt his hands on her shoulders and his warm breath touching her left ear.

  “Question twenty.”

  She held her breath knowing that their game was about to end. She would ask him for more questions and to never let this game end between them.

  “Yes,” she said as her eyes focused on the sight of Geelong.

  “Will you wear something for me?”

  Her eyebrows furrowed.

  But instead of questioning him, she trusted him. “Yes.”

  Noel swiped her hair over her right shoulder. His body close as her heart started to beat erratically, completely unaware of what he had planned. Suddenly something silver caught her eye. She smiled at the heart locket that Noel fastened around her neck.

  “You fixed it,” she said as she turned her head to the left to see the corner of his smile.

  “Yeah. Now open it,” he instructed.

  She felt the warmth of his body leave her. Her fingers held the silver locket and she looked at the Celtic knot. No end or beginning, just an endless nature of time, a symbol of their love. Clara unclasped the locket, the hinge secure and she was relieved that she could now wear it. Inside she saw a piece of folded paper. She knew that paper from when he gave it to her back on her supposed wedding day.

  His words of love were on this one piece of paper. She took it out and noticed it wasn’t as worn as she remembered. It looked new. She frowned. Clara closed the locket and let it rest against her chest. Unfolding the piece of paper, she didn’t see the words that he wrote. It was new. She read it out loud.

  “Question twenty-one. Clara Louise Lawrence…”

  Her heart stopped and her breath left her. Turning around quickly, she watched Noel dig into his pocket, took out a small velvet box before kneeling down on one knee.

  She looked at him in utter disbelief, forgetting to breathe as he opened the box. A beautiful diamond ring with two Celtic knots was held before her.

  “This is the spot I knew I was falling in love with you. This is my favourite spot in the world because it got me closer to you and it got you to trust me. This spot is where I saw you for who you were not who you’re related to. This is the spot that made me forget about everything else in the world but you. And this is the spot I’m asking you my final question.”

  Tears filled Clara’s eyes as she placed one hand on her chest, holding her locket.

  “Question twenty-one. Clara Louise Lawrence, would you make me the happiest man in the world by being my wife? Will you marry me?”

  She kept her focus on those beautiful green loving eyes of his as her tears ran. It was the most heartfelt and meaningful proposal she had ever witnessed. It was made for them. It was perfect. He was perfect. He was her world. The perfect moments in their lives would never live up to this moment.

  Clara nodded her head and choked out, “Yes.”

  “Yes?” he asked one more time.

  “Yes, I’ll marry you,” she said so surely.

  He took out the ring out and balanced the box on his knee. The large smile on his face made her heart leap.

  Noel took her left hand and said, “I love you, Clara Louise Lawrence. For all my life I will,” before he slid the Celtic knot diamond engagement ring on her finger.

  Her life felt complete the moment she said yes. This was what she wanted for the rest of her life, Noel as her husband.

  Noel quickly got up as the ring box fell to the ground, and slowly kissed her. Tears of joy ran down her cheeks. She was engaged to the right man.

  Pulling her face back, Noel smiled at her. “I’ve been waiting over a year to ask you.”

  “What?”

  His thumbs wiped away her tears.

  “The day of Max’s cousin's party, I spent the day getting your ring resized. I was going to propose to you that night once I got your brother’s blessing.”

  Clara tensed in his hold.

  “Oh my God. You were going to… and I ended it. I’m so sorry. Noel, I’m so sorry I believed her and didn’t let you explain,” she apologised profusely.

  “Hey, it’s okay. It was too soon back then. We know now that we are meant to be with each other. We don’t ever have to think about her or anyone else again. It’s you and I, Clara, we’re perfect together, even if we’re messy and clueless at times.”

  “We’re perfectly imperfect together,” she agreed. “Did you ask Alex this time round?”

  Noel kissed her forehead and nodded. “I asked him and Liam for their blessing to marry you.”

  She was stunned at how much effort he went to. That’s when Clara understood Liam’s words to her at the bakery. He was letting her go and she was free to marry Noel.

  “Thank you for asking them for their blessing, especially Liam,” she said gratefully.

  “I needed his blessing so I’d know that when I married you there would be no hard feelings and we could live happily together in Boston. But I do have another question.”

  She looked down at her hands on his chest and the engagement ring on her finger. This was where her heart belonged. The ring was perfect. The Celtic knot was theirs.

  “Will you marry me before we leave Australia? Will you be Mrs. Nolan Parker before we go to Boston?”

  Her heart stopped at the thought of her last name being his.

  Clara Louise Parker.

  “Yes, I’ll marry you before we leave. I want nothing more in this world than to be your wife.”

  THE FINAL VOW

  One month later

  The moment they returned to the bakery his life changed. His mother and gran, along with his fiancée’s friends changed the bakery from Clara’s graduation celebrations to their engagement party. A quick message to Alex, and their family and friends knew of their engagement. The first thing Clara feared was Liam’s reaction, but he had to reassure her of Liam’s blessing. Liam was the first person Clara walked to when they returned to the bakery.

  With his impatience to marry Clara as quickly as possible, their plans for Christmas in New York were changed. His wait to purpose meant they wouldn’t make the one-month requirement to submit their Notice of Intended Marriage form to their celebrant. But there was nothing like spending Christmas and New Year with his family and his bride-to-be. His life was perfect. His mother, father, gran and brother welcomed Clara into the family with open arms, like they did all her life.

  Alex and Keira stayed in Melbourne, deciding that Christmas and New Year was a family affair that they wanted to share with Noel and Clara. Each time he woke up he had to look at Clara’s finger to reassure himself that it wasn’t a dream. That extra two weeks meant he was able to plan the perfect wedding with Clara. The one thing she was secretive about was her wedding dress, she wanted something new and wanted something just for his eye.

  “Bad news.”

  He heard Rob say behind him. His nerves were getting the best of him. He wasn’t sure how to deal with bad news. Turning away from the sight of the golf course, Noel
looked at his groomsman.

  “Tell me she didn’t run?” There was desperation in his voice, but he hadn’t seen Clara in a day as they stuck to tradition. That would be the worst news he’d ever hear on his wedding day.

  Rob let out an honest chuckle and shook his head. “Nope, she’s in her bridal suite. Spoke to Annie and Clara’s there. Bad news is Julian’s connecting flight got delayed from Sydney. He’s landing later than we thought. You’ve got one less groomsmen to walk one of Clara’s bridesmaids.”

  Reaching for his dark purple tie, Noel thought about the options he had. One less groomsmen meant one less bridesmaid and he didn’t want Clara with one less.

  “Is Jarred around? You mind asking him if he’d like to walk Annie down. I owe him a lot and no doubt he’d love nothing more than to be in Clara’s wedding.”

  “Right, good choice. Have you got the other surprise in motion?”

  Noel nodded proudly. His other surprise was moments away from happening. He just wished he were there to see it happen.

  Rob grinned and said, “I’ll see you in a sec. I’ll go find Jarred and ask,” before he slipped out of the groom’s retreat.

  He remembered the times his and Clara’s families came up to Eagle Ridge golf course on the Mornington Peninsula. He wanted to give Clara a memorable wedding and Eagle Ridge was one of many of their memories together. He suggested the golf course because he knew Clara would much rather an outdoor wedding and Eagle Ridge was a stunning location for their wedding.

  “Here, let me get that for you, Nolan.”

  Looking up, he saw his mother enter the room with a smile he had never seen. She looked beyond happy to see him getting ready to marry the love of his life. Given her age, his mother was still as beautiful as she had always been.

  Stepping in front of him, his mother popped up his collar and adjusted the length of his tie. The sparkle in her eyes didn’t disappear as she started to transform the tie into a Windsor knot.

  “I remember the day you gave Clara that flower,” she said softly as she adjusted the knot into place.