by Elena Monroe
He looked confused when he paused from his paper trail hunt. “A false promise? No, she was compensated for her promise to give her daughter a better life than she had. Neither of us knew what that meant back then when we were kids. We thought they were indulging us, but you were promised to the Clave, to a Horseman… and that wasn’t going to be me back then. It was going to be Braeden.”
I was promised to Braeden… the twin who couldn’t stand me? When every fucking adult in our lives knew I was a package deal with Bowen?
“We didn’t have money, Bowen. She wasn’t compensated for selling her daughter’s future. I would know if she came into money.” I was trying to reject his confession and make it so sinful no amount of Hail Marys would suffice.
She was evil… but that evil?
My mom and stepdad got greedy for more when he had already paid to keep me safe?
Dropping more papers to the floor, nearly covering the hardwood, he rifled through more files on the top shelf, ignoring me. Turning towards me again, he dropped a stack of letters into my hands.
“What is all this?” I was still holding onto the letters like they were the only sacredness left in the room full of sins.
“The truth.” Dropping plane tickets at my feet and more papers I couldn’t read; his eyes were searing into my soul with all the truth he had refused to tell me. “Don’t for one second think I didn’t fight for you.”
Cradling them to my chest, I read his handwriting and the date stamped in the corner of the one on top. Setting them on the desk carefully, I let my fingertips drag over the worn envelopes as I looked them over. Bowen wrote me countless times and every letter was returned to the sender.
They were just as damaged from their journey as we were.
My head was spinning when I saw the polaroids of the girls out of the corner of my eye and knew there was still more truths to uncover. “Who are these girls then? Why do they look like me?”
Bowen stopped reaching for more papers when he stood so still, I wondered if this truth was different—painful, instead of the kind you want to hear.
“I was looking for you, Eve. When they wouldn’t agree to a price or terms I thought the worst… I thought they were preparing to throw you into something worse.” I could see whatever armor he normally wore that protected his feelings from the world, melt right before me.
He thought I was going to show up in a lineup of girls being sold?
I knew I was always a burden, but being a paycheck and unwanted altogether was new.
Shaking my head, my nails dug even deeper into my palms with frustration. “I don’t understand. Your mom said she was groomed too. Isn’t this normal, Bowen? Maybe mine was just worse because of Elias… This must just be how it is for women who are set to marry Horsemen.”
CeCe and I have been exchanging texts ever since my mother left after the wedding, and everything she typed seemed laced with clues that led to here. I thought she was trying to make me feel better, let me know things could be worse like it was for her but really she was helping me prepare for this moment like a true Queen. Bowen’s mom, CeCe confided in me that she was groomed and that her family was given a dowry to be his dad’s arranged wife.
His balled-up fist hit the built-in shelf with so much force, I winced inward at how it must have hurt. “This isn’t normal, Eve! Nothing you went through is normal. Elias and your mom sabotaging us isn’t normal. Paying for what’s already mine isn’t normal. Sending letters just for them to be returned, showing up in Denmark just to be turned away, rewriting endless contracts to be with you… none of it is normal. It’s purgatory.”
He began to step closer but slowly like I was a wild animal and if he flinched, I would hurt him.
Everything in my DNA worships him; hurting him only hurts me.
Whispering between us, he let the last truth escape. “You were always promised to Braeden. They just let us believe what we wanted, fairy tales and fables to keep us in the dark. When he died I had to take his place in every way as a Horseman, but he never told me all the ways this world was going to break us.”
My lip trembled so much I felt it vibrate through every limb. “You’re lying. You have to be lying.” My fists hit his chest, testing our boundaries and praying for lies when I knew better. Bowen’s cruelty was always rooted in truth no matter how much people believed he was made of loose morals.
My fists beat into him wildly, and he took every sloppy hit, steeling himself in place. I was aiming toward every part of him that resembled Braeden and what I wish was the lie out of all the truths.
“If you love me, why can’t you lie to me, Bowen? Just lie to me! We’ve been through too much already.” The floodgates broke in my eyes even more than they already had, and my hands slowed to crash against him messily like I could beat the pain away while I shook myself into a deep cry.
“Too many people lie to us, Eve. It’s time for the truth,” his voice was barely above a whisper and gripped every heartstring I had.
Sometimes I thought that was all that was left after they broke me.
Just one string left holding my heart inside my chest.
I couldn’t compute any of this. This was a nightmare born out of the one person who was always scaring my monsters away.
His hands finally grabbed my wrists, having enough of my brutal assault. With force, he shifted us around and pushed my body against a bookshelf, holding my wrists against the binding of the books. “That’s enough. We’re stronger than this… we survived too much…” I wasn’t positive he was
done speaking; his thoughts weren’t complete. But then I realized he wasn’t just convincing me; he was convincing himself too.
“Maybe we survived too much and now the good parts don’t feel as blessed. Maybe we’re just numb now.” I retorted as I gave up struggling against his thunder grip.
I took a step onto a stack of love stories acting like as a pedestal, and his lips pressed onto mine at the same time his hand pinned my leg to his hip. Almost meeting his eye level, I took some deep breaths realizing our nightmare of lives even matched.
His eyes darkened to a dreary kind of gray that was more overcast than a storm when he leaned into me. “You’ll never not feel like my savior, Eve. You’re the only one who makes me feel.”
Within this moment… It was like we were just two kids again, crazy enough to be in love before we knew what that meant. Every cruel intention, every wall, every last defense and act of quick, strong will had vanished between us.
My lips pressed to his before he took over, smoothing his hands down my arms, releasing them both from his grasp and placing them on his shoulders. Every ounce of love in his touch crawled down to my waist, around my hips, and down my leg still at his hip. He trailed his hand slowly back up, sending a wave of chills down my spine until the tee shirt was pushed up my thigh enough to make me feel on display.
Every inch of his cock pressed against the inside of my thigh, and his lips demanded mine be sore after he was done with me. The chaste feeling of my own used lips had to be my favorite before I realized mine had felt more than his. “Are you still in denial, Evey? I can’t fuck the truth away.”
“If you stop my soul won’t stop screaming.” It was the truth because we couldn’t keep lying after all that. I have enough bad memories to keep Bowen fucking my demons away for years.
Still standing on the stack of books, I felt his hands lift me up by my ass, and I naturally wrapped my legs around his waist.
I didn’t expect him to maneuver us completely when he held me against him until I felt the rung of a ladder pressing into my ass. Reaching up, I wrapped my hands around a rung, holding on while his hands smoothed down to grasp the backs of my thighs. The butterflies he gave me made me feel warm and nervous in ways I thought would surely fade by now.
“I like it when your soul screams. It scares away my demons.” His voice sounded more stable than it did before, but I could still see where the single tear ran down his che
ek.
The wetness between my thighs felt sinful, the books lining the shelves felt romantic, and the papers littered the floor so heavily that you couldn’t see it as anything other than our new foundation.
This was us; nothing between us any longer.
My hands rushed to push his shirt up enough for him to pull over his head while my fingers etched over his toned, slender muscles.
“Bowey…” I needed to know that he hadn’t vacated himself. I needed to know I wasn’t the only one reeling from feelings.
“I’m here, Evey, in all its painful glory.” His hands gripped the sides of the ladder, body pushing between my legs and inching down into me until our lips were so close I swore I could taste him.
Pushing down his damp joggers between us, I whispered into the small space between us, “If I forgive you for lying will you forgive yourself for not being able to save me?”
His features, sharp and smooth at the same time, relinquished all lust and in exchange turned hard. If he was considering it, he didn’t want me to know.
Breaking eye contact, he adjusted his gaze downward when I caught the reflection of his eyes welling up. Something I hadn’t seen since we were kids when he took on the vulnerable role in our relationship.
BOWEN
She wanted to forgive me.
Half of me felt exonerated, and half of me felt too similar to Elias.
Her head fell to the side, trying to maintain eye contact when I was determined to look away until the wetness in my eyes dried up.
“Bowey, you couldn’t save me any more than I could have saved you. Maybe we both need to see that instead of putting these standards on each other. You were my savior too,” her voice was a steady whisper, but it didn’t stop me from hurting less.
Savior, it had a ring to it, one I certainly never equated myself to.
I sentenced myself to this kind of slow death, and it wasn’t to come out the other end a hero.
Her hands were shaking in a way that reminded me of raw passion as they reached between us to push down the fabric of my boxer briefs. I could tell she was nervous this might actually fix us the way we had been trying to fill our vacancies.
Her pouty lips already had my abs tight and hands grasping whatever I could of her when she whispered, “May I…?”
The Eve I knew didn’t ever use those kinds of words, anything resembling manners was the opposite of being the tiny terror she used to be.
Leaning into her, I reached over her head, wrapping my hands around the rung to let her crumble under the proximity of me. “Fuck being polite… isn’t that what you used to say, Evey?”
Biting down on her lips, I could tell she wanted to smile because I never forgot anything. Not when it came to our past.
Her feet were still close to the ground when I whispered in her ear, “Turn over.” I wanted to see her from every angle, still commit her to memory even though she was already mine.
Twisting between me and the ladder I was still clamping down on, I felt her pert little ass drag its way across my crotch, trying to start a fire with the friction. My hands immediately started lifting her shirt up past her ass, only pausing to smooth over her poreless skin that felt like home under my fingertips.
It was hard to believe she was a tomboy with a sailor mouth when she was made of fucking holy things but made you want to sin.
Pushing up the shirt, I pulled it over her head and let it drop amongst the proof I had fought for her along with all the love stories I collected in her absence.
Her arms were still reached over her head, holding onto the ladder rung as she shoved her ass into my painfully hard dick, already moaning more than I could take. Slipping my hand in front of her body, I found the warmth between her legs, and she jumped at the coldness of all the rings covering my fingers.
Dropping her head between her shoulders, her ass pushed further into me at just a simple touch. I smirked, knowing that I was going to corrupt any more need to use the polite words she learned in our time apart.
She gasped as her hands grasped the bar above her even tighter, her moans leaking from her mouth as much as the wetness from between her legs. Pushing two fingers inside, she whined like it wasn’t enough until they climbed so deep inside her my signet ring rubbed exactly where she was most sensitive.
Brushing her hair away from her ear, I pressed my chest to her back with my fingers still buried between her legs. “Being polite doesn’t fix us, does it, baby?” She shuddered against my hand, starting to grind against it.
Her voice was strained, and her hands clutched onto the ladder as she tried to ride my fingers. “No, fuck being polite.”
Dirty words from an angel’s mouth had the ability to make me so hard it hurt.
I was out of breath just from stilling enough to hear her moans that tasted like honey every time I inhaled one. “That’s my girl. The world robbed us of a lot of things—politeness being one of them.”
Feeling her clench around my fingers, I knew she was gracefully coming undone. Tensing with her eyes clamped down and her moans so quiet I debated if they existed.
I planned to fuck her until I felt healed; until she was less graceful.
Unclasping her hand from the rung, I held her delicately, guiding her to spin around like a princess in a ball gown. Only instead of a ball gown, she was stitched together by an orgasm.
Her wetness was still lingering on my fingers and coating my ring with her E stamped on the top. Standing in front of me, her mouth collapsed open, and I knew exactly what she wanted—to taste herself.
Every movement and every expression went straight to my aching dick. Letting my fingers move past her lips, I watched them clamp down around my fingers and suck with so much skill I swore I could feel her mouth on me in other locations.
An unexpected groan pushed past my lips when I watched her drop down, sitting on the lowest rung of the ladder to admire me from a new angle. Brushing her hair out of the way, my hand smoothed down her black silky hair to the back of her head. Not pushing her mouth onto me the way I wanted but letting her tease me.
I deserved it: her rubbing in how much she’s mine now after all these years.
The gracefulness fell when her lips latched onto me, and I was buried in her mouth the same way my fingers were buried between her legs. My head wanted to drop back but I forced my eyes to stay trained on her hollow cheeks and lips turning even puffier with each inch of me she took in.
I was holding my breath again, stilling everything in me to focus on her.
“Evey, you’re going to have to stop unless you want this to end abruptly.” I tried to warn her but there was no stopping her. As long as some of me was always filling her she was happy.
Every orifice.
Every wound.
Her eyes fluttered open, looking through her thick lashes with her hands planted on my thighs, not stopping because I wanted her less graceful and that’s what I got. Eve couldn’t be told what to do—ever.
Tonguing my length, I watched her carefully lick all the way to my tip, swirling her togue around to lap up any pre-cum like it was candy. She was toying with me in ways that were hard to handle when my hand carefully pulled on her hair, forcing her head back and mouth off of me. “I can’t fuck you if you keep sucking like that. You want me to fuck you, don’t you, baby girl?”
I knew the answer before she could respond when she sat back on the ladder looking at me like she was for the taking.
She wasn’t for the taking; she was for the earning.
I leaned down enough to make eye contact before I pressed my lips to hers and felt her clamor to me, her legs desperately wrapping around mine and her arms threatening to choke me if I removed my lips from hers.
Scooping her up in my hands, I held her against me, stepping out of my pants all the way and pressing her back carefully against the bookshelves lining the walls.
We were going to fuck against other love stories like we were showing the greats how it was
really done.
With her legs tightly around my waist, I closed my fist around myself, guiding myself to where she wanted me. We both exhaled heavily, trying to steady our pace before we even started so this didn’t end as quickly as every other time.
She was wetter than ever before, dripping down the inside of her own legs and coating me with every inch I pushed inside. Eve was wolfish and malnourished at the same time, begging for anything she could get of me.
The same way I was starved for her.
She felt so tight that every thrust of my hips pushing her further into the bookshelf felt like too close to coming.
Inside Eve you could forget Hell ever existed.
I felt her elbows dig into my shoulders, her nails claw at my already scared skin, and her legs barely letting me move between her moans.
She was coming more undone every second when some of the books got rocked lose enough to commit suicide, diving off the shelf to the rest of the evidence below us.
I had one hand on her ass keeping her against me, and one hand bracing a shelf. That spare hand was all I had to keep my control.
Her lips hovered over mine, but every thrust of me inside her pushed her mouth away. Holding her in my hands, I walked to the desk and dropped her down on the edge.
“I can’t fuck you without kissing you. These are like… being rescued by you.” My thumb dragged against her full bottom lip before I let my mouth crash down into hers.
My knuckles dug into the desk behind her bare ass as I felt her mouth fall open and her tongue licking my lips feverishly.
She wanted inside me as much as I was inside her.
Picking up a steady pace again, I swallowed her moan pouring into my mouth when our hips collided. Leaning into her more, I kept our mouths close while she tightened against every inch of me.