by Alexie Aaron
“She often leaves you to worry,” Tauni mentioned.
“It’s kind of our jobs,” Ted said smiling. “I’m in her ear on the investigation. It’s what brought us together. She finds me funny.”
“Mr. Martin,” Laran said. “I would like to show you something.”
Ted walked over to the computer station.
“Your wife’s brain activity has increased dramatically. If she was running on a treadmill, I would see similar readings. Her mind is very active.”
“She’s trying to navigate in the dark,” Ted said, amazed.
“What I was trying to say is that, if you knew I wasn’t in my right mind, why did you knee me in my privates?” Murphy asked.
“Better that than become impaled on them.”
“I wouldn’t have done that.”
“You were headed there. Now let’s drop it. We have to make sure we’re moving in a straight line.”
Murphy moved alongside her and grasped her hand. “I would never have caused you to be afraid of me if given the chance.”
“I know, but you went all douchebag frat boy on me. ‘What’s the harm, Mia. It’s only a game,’” she mimicked.
Murphy smiled funny. “You should relax and think of England.”
Mia looked sideways at Murphy and laughed. “Where did you hear that?”
“Cid’s book on tape. He listens to books when he is cleaning.”
“Huh, I’ve never noticed. K. Yes, I know you would have come to your senses, but what if you didn’t?”
“Then I would go to the Dark World where everything is… Well, look where we are now. We should have done it.”
Mia punched his arm. “Let’s change the subject.”
“The willow trees in the front twenty are starting to regulate the water. It’s not so swampy there anymore.”
“That’s great. I’d really love to see if we could open up a few springs and get that little stream back. You remember that, don’t you?”
“It was one of the reasons I chose that property. Mia, it was so beautiful. The trees were so tall. I hated to cut them down, but I was careful and planned my cuts so I didn’t waste too much. The waste we burned for heat.”
“What was your furniture like?” Mia asked.
“We didn’t have much. Most of it came from my family’s house in the city. Chastity’s father gave us the bathtub. It was a devil of a thing to plumb. The house didn’t have water, except for the kitchen, but I made a drain so Chastity wouldn’t have to bail the tub. It just ran down and out into the south field.”
“There was a lot of work to be done.”
“I didn’t mind. I did mind that no children came.”
“That had to be disappointing.”
“God’s will. I had hoped to see the place be passed down from father to son and so on.”
“Instead, it had a series of bad landlords.”
“Until April, and then Ted, who I could not be happier with. It will be nice to see Brian run about. Will you be having more children?”
“I hope so. The Council took away my ability to bear children for right now.”
“How does that make you feel?”
“Angry. They think that I will have a nephilim. They don’t trust me and Sariel. I’m furious.”
“You stopped him before, Mia.”
“Like I stopped you. I can take care of myself.”
“I think they are worried about others taking advantage. These are strong entities, and even though you are mighty, you are small,” Murphy pointed out.
“Throughout history, it’s the women who suffer. If we are sullied, then somehow we are controllable.”
“Not all men behave this way, just the frightened ones,” Murphy said.
Mia stopped and turned. “I keep forgetting what a wise man you are.”
“Mia, you have to let go of your anger. It hampers your view of the world.”
“It does.”
“Are you still mad at Ted?” Murphy asked as they continued to walk.
“No. I’m understanding him better though. He’s very complex.”
“I listen to the people around you, and they are puzzled about why you chose him to be your husband.”
“I hear them too. They think that I have to be paired with someone classically handsome. It’s what’s inside that needs to be beautiful. He is beautiful inside, Murphy, just as you are.”
“Inside, I’m smoke.”
Mia laughed. “Beautiful smoke. You’re not bad looking on the outside either.”
“But that didn’t stop you from kneeing me.”
“I’d do it again, so watch yourself. I’m a loyal wife.”
“You are, aren’t you?”
“Yes. That is one thing I’m proud about.”
“Anything else?”
Mia pointed to the light up ahead. “Being able to navigate in the dark.”
~
“Heads up, Mia just walked out on the screen. She’s got something in her hand. Let’s hope it’s not Murphy’s balls,” Mike said.
Ted ran over and put on the headset. “Mia, you made great time. What do you have there?”
She held up an ACME Disintegration Pistol. She mimed shooting herself.
“That’s a great idea, but I don’t think Jake shot himself and disappeared. I seriously doubt that thing works.”
Mia pointed it at Murphy who was balancing a rock on top of his head.
“Mia, don’t!” Ted shouted.
Mia laughed. She was in a great mood. She lowered the pistol.
Cid skidded into the room. “How did they get here so fast?” he asked.
“I don’t know. Maybe my estimate was wrong,” Ted said, looking at the map.
Mia tucked the pistol into the back of her pants, picked up her sword, and started towards the entrance to the temple.
It was overgrown with trees. Murphy stopped to appreciate the old trees. Mia moved warily around the inside, looking in every crevice.
“Jake!” she called. “We’ve come to rescue you.”
CRACK! Murphy’s axe sounded.
They looked around, but there wasn’t any Jake.
“Well, fuck me and leave me a rose. We came all this way and no Jake.”
CRACK! CRACK! Murphy signaled and pointed up.
Mia looked up, and peering down at them from above was a giant eye.
“Jake!” Mia said, pointing up.
Neither Ted nor Cid could see what Mia was pointing at.
Mia pointed to her eye and then pointed up.
“Maybe it’s Jake. You know, in his irritating eyeball guise,” Burt said.
“We need to leave here,” Mia said.
“Mia, tell him that the programmers are going to do a server purge,” Ted said.
Jake, the programmers are going…
“I heard,” Jake said in his Marvin the Martian voice. “I can’t move. I’ve been written into the code.”
“Oh shit, that’s going to be hard to mime,” Mia said.
Ted watched as Mia opened an eye real big and then typed with her fingers.
“Sorry, Minnie Mouse, I haven’t a clue.”
Mia waved Murphy over. She pushed him down and touched her ear.
“Sounds like…”
She got on top of Murphy and mimed having sex with him.
“Dude, she’s riding him,” Cid said.
Mike got to his feet and was disappointed they were still dressed. “Rode,” he said, bored.
Mia nodded. She got off of Murphy, held up her hand and pretended to write on it.
“Wrote… write… written,” Ted called out.
“Dude, Jake is written into the code,” Cid guessed.
Mia nodded, jumping up and down.
“Give us a minute, Minnie Mouse. Step away from Murphy. He’s confused.”
“How could Jake get caught up in the code?” Cid asked.
“I bet you a ten, he was data mining at the time. Wait, look here,” Ted said,
extracting code. “Shit, Jake’s been written into the fabric of the ceiling.”
“Probably, they liked the texture of him,” Cid wisecracked.
“I’ve got to write a patch to pull him out and, yes, patch the ceiling because the whole game is unstable here. The top could come crashing down and kill Mia and Murphy,” Ted said, trying not to panic.
Murphy looked up at her from the ground. “I get kneed for touching your breasts, and you do that to me and expect to get away with it?”
Mia took off running. Murphy caught her and turned her over his knee and smacked her behind.
“Guys,” Mike said, trying to get their attention. “Mia’s getting spanked.”
Ted was typing furiously, and Cid was checking his code.
Burt walked in and looked at the screen. “Well, it’s about time. I wanted to do that but was afraid I’d end up with… She punched Murphy in the eye. He’s got her by the hair. Watch her foot… Ouch.”
“I’m a bit worried. Do you care that Mia is kicking the shit out of Murphy?” Mike asked. “Murphy’s got your wife on the ground, Ted. He’s got her arm behind her… No, he did. Mia’s rolled over, and he’s leaning down, she’s bucking her body, and now she’s on her feet. She did that to me once. Yup, here comes that left foot, and Murphy is down for the count.”
“Ouch,” Burt said as Mia pushed Murphy onto the ground with her foot.
“She better watch it. Damn, he’s got her foot. He’s reeling her in.” Mike looked over at a very focused Ted.
Mike slid into Ted’s chair and took control of Mia’s body. He twisted her around and had her back away.
Murphy looked over.
Burt picked up Cid’s controller and had him stand still.
“What the hell are you waiting for, you mamma’s boy?” Mia asked, chafing at the bit.
“Someone is stopping me,” Murphy said. “If not, I’d have you polishing my boots with your hair.”
“Mia, calm down. Your husband and Cid are working on a solution.”
Mia looked at the screen. She pointed to Murphy.
“Burt has Murphy.”
Mia had a look on her face that Mike had seen before. She pouted her lips and shoved her chest forward.
“No. You can’t beat him up.”
Mia pointed out at the screen.
“No, I can’t beat him up.”
Mia unbuttoned her shirt.
“Burt, I swear to God, that’s not me. I can’t control her hands,” Mike said.
Mia turned around and dropped the shirt off her shoulders to show her bare back to the screen.
“Mia, cut it out,” Mike ordered.
Burt was laughing so hard, he had tears in his eyes. Murphy, who was getting a free show, scratched his head.
“Fine,” Mike said, releasing Mia. She tied her top in front of her, ran, jumped and landed both feet on Murphy’s chest. She took off running for the blackness.
It took Murphy a moment to get up. He didn’t look happy. He set his axe down and strode off into the darkness.
He came back carrying Mia over his shoulder. He dropped her on the ground and set a boot on her back.
Mia was exhausted. She just resigned herself to losing. She lay her head down and closed her eyes.
Mike looked over at Burt and was very confused. Mike said, “I thought she had him. I wonder what happened in the darkness.”
“Knowing those two jokers, nothing. It’s all been a setup. I think for your and my benefit,” Burt said.
Ted came back to the console. Mike got up.
Mia sat placidly at Murphy’s feet. He was innocently checking out a tree.
“Mia, I’m going to launch the code. This should release Jake. When it does, I want the three of you to run through the back entrance of the temple. This is your portal home.”
Mia nodded.
She repeated the information to Murphy. He nodded. Mia watched above them as Marvin fell out of the sky into her arms. She set him down.
“Nice catch human. Nice tits too,” he said, reaching up.
“I’ll break both your arms,” Mia said. “Come on, I want to go home.”
“To the portal,” Murphy said.
They moved towards the archway. Three computer-generated thugs jumped down in front of them.
Mia drew her sword and tossed Marvin his pistol. She lunged forward and let Ted work his mad skills. Mia spun around as she stabbed each thug in turn. Murphy took his axe and went for their legs. Marvin shot holes into them, but they still didn’t go down.
Ted feared that this was the “no woman wins the game” caveat. The thugs continued to fight as Murphy hacked pieces off of them.
“Mia, you have to get to the portal!” Ted shouted. “You’re running out of time.”
She nodded. She turned around and put her hands together. Murphy ran at her, putting a foot into her hands. Mia launched him in the air and watched as Murphy flew over the trio and attacked them from behind. This gave Mia time to attach a rope to an arrow. She aimed and managed to embed the arrow into a tree, the roots of which were growing out of the wall. Holding onto the free end of the rope, Mia grabbed Marvin, ran backwards, and twisted around as the rope tensed. She then let the rebound take her over the thugs, nearly flattening Murphy in the process. She ran back and pulled Murphy after her.
The last thing Cid and Ted saw was the three of them disappearing into the archway.
Mia came through first. She waited to see that Jake made the exit from the game. She carried the ball of energy, that was Jake, to the main PEEPs computer and watched him enter the housing. Soon he was walking across the screen. Mia turned to see Murphy move through the portal. She ran to catch him in her arms. Mia carried him away from the portal. She staggered under the weight of him and his axe.
Cid was on his feet. He set down an energon cube. Mia waited until Murphy had taken on energy and was thriving. She yelled in Cid’s ear, “Shut down the portal!”
“Shut down the portal, dude. They are all out,” Cid called to Ted.
Mia walked out towards the barn. She walked past Tauni and her father before she climbed up and laid down into the bed and into her body.
“Full neuro content,” Laran said.
“She’s back,” Tauni said as Mia’s eyes fluttered open.
They heard a pounding of tennis shoes, and Ted was there at her side. Mia waited patiently while Tauni and her father disconnected her from their contraptions. Ted lifted her out and set her carefully on the ground. “You did it, Ted. You got me safely in and out of that game.”
“I didn’t do it alone. We did something impossible.”
“It wasn’t impossible, just mostly impossible,” Mia said, stamping her foot to get the feeling back.
“Mia, is there any reason Murphy should be sporting a silly smile on his face?”
“I started something, and he finished it.”
“I heard you two were fighting.”
I was winning, and then that wuss took control and…” Mia’s words were stopped by Ted’s mouth on hers. He kissed her long and hard.
“Whoa,” she said when he released her. She walked into the office.
Cid, Burt, Mike and Audrey stood up and clapped.
Mia took an embarrassed bow. She looked over at the monitor, and Jake stood holding a bouquet of flowers. “Good to see you back, Jake,” Mia said. “Now if you will excuse me, I really have to pee.” Mia ran into the bathroom.
Chapter Seventeen
Mia and Ted sat on the porch and watched the others celebrate Jake’s return. Mia was tired and missing her son. Ted could feel her weariness and kept an arm around her shoulders. He felt her break down and start crying. He excused them and took Mia into the house.
“He’s not coming back, is he?” Mia asked, clinging to Ted. “I’m going to have to go and get him.”
“We’ll go together, but, Mia, it hasn’t been that long.”
“A moment away from you and Brian is too long,” she sa
id stubbornly.
“Ted!” Cid called. “Angelo’s driver is pulling up.”
They looked at each other. Mia ran to open the guestroom windows while Ted spoke to the driver. He handed Ted two suit bags before accepting the cold beer from Cid.
Ted climbed the stairs. He found his wife pacing the floor. He hung up the clothing and took her in his arms. “You’re shaking.”
“I’m so nervous. He’s not going to know us, Ted. He’s going to be so mad.”
“No, he’s not. We’ll spoil him, and soon he’ll forget all about it. It has been too quiet here without his constant chatter.”
“We should have gone with him.”
“Mia, stop. What’s done is done. It’s time to anticipate the good things, like smelly diapers and interrupted sex.”
Mia smiled up at her husband. “I love you, Teddy Bear.”
Orion flew in first. He pulled on his clothes quickly and exited the room into his granddaughter’s arms. “He’s fine, Mia. He and I have had a chance to bond. He is the most amazing boy. Ted, your son will do you proud. Let’s get this world sorted so I can have more great-grandchildren. I want an even dozen.”
Mia shook her head. “Please remember, I’m not a cat.”
There was a flutter of wings, and Orion walked inside the room. Ted held on to Mia more for his own support than to keep her from rushing in. Orion carried Brian out to his parents.
“He’s grown,” Mia gasped. “Brian, you promised.”
Orion set the reaching child in Mia’s arms.
“Aham, Da Dee,” Brian said joyfully.
Orion watched as the young couple took their son into the nursery for a few minutes alone. Angelo opened the door and walked out.
“How’s the reunion?” he asked, searching the hall.
“Joyous.” Orion wiped a tear off his nose.
Mia handed Brian to Ted. “I’ll be right back,” she said. She walked into the hall. “Angelo, thank you for bringing him back to us and for keeping him safe. Please stay and enjoy our celebration.”