by T. L Smith
Say what? None of my concern? Did he... did he just... dismiss me? Again?
“You don’t get to dismiss me twice, Hawk Carnage.”
“I didn’t dismiss you. You walked away, remember?”
The fucking hide...
Rising to my feet, I prepared for battle. “I walked away because you chose Celeste over me. You chose to end what we had. This. Was. All. You.” I was seething and Hawk never flinched.
“You two had a thing?” Ricky asked, dumbfounded.
We both turned to him.
“Yes, and you can shut up about it,” I snapped. “It was a mistake from the start.”
This time, Hawk did flinch. “A mistake? You think what we shared was a mistake?”
“Yeah, I do,” I lied, fearful the emotions would take charge. I didn’t want to cry in front of him. “You made a decision that affected both of us, and you didn’t care how badly it hurt me.”
“What about how it hurt me?”
I scoffed at this. “You did it without a second thought, Hawk. So please don’t insult my intelligence by telling me otherwise. You’ve got yourself an instant family, and you practically jumped at it.”
He took two steps forward until we were arm’s length apart, the vein in his neck working overtime. “I don’t want an instant family with Celeste. I want to start a family with you, Britta. I wanted my future with you.”
This confession threw me for a six. I knew what I’d wanted out of the relationship, but Hawk had been the one who called it for what it was, ‘friends with benefits.’
My eyes started to sting with tears, a large lump forming in my throat. “You wanted to start a family with me?” I whispered.
“I still want that.”
“You’re an asshole.”
A smile twitched his lips, and my heart caved. “You can call me any name you like... in bed.”
“Ohhh okay...” Harry erupted. “We don’t need to listen to your sex talk.”
“Fuck, bro,” Ricky started, shaking his head in disbelief. “We’re still trying to get used to the idea of you two, so tone it down a notch.”
I giggled, embarrassed members of my family had to hear that, and giddy to have Hawk flirt with me once more.
He pulled me in close, wrapping his muscled arms around my body and holding me tight. I started to cry against his chest, and it wouldn’t stop.
Hawk whispered in my ear, attempting to soothe my sore heart, “Babe,” he began speaking so only I could hear. “I’m sorry for everything,” he continued to repeat the words until they began to sink in and I believed them.
Chapter 22
Britta
“I need your help.”
They were four words that set my soul at unease. I’d never seen this side of Hawk. He was tired. Worried. And above all else, scared shitless.
And I didn’t blame him.
We sat in Slate’s bedroom with the door closed, and I allowed him to confide in me. There were a lot of unanswered questions, and to be honest, Hawk was in a lot of shit.
I listened as he started from the beginning.
Celeste.
“She was only a fling that lasted a few nights. And she only became a fling because I knew she was flying out.” Hawk looked me dead in the eyes. “I don’t love her, Britta. I never will. This baby...” he exhaled heavily, “... it was the last thing I expected. What I expected was to have children with you.”
“Hawk, I never knew you felt like that. I thought we were just ‘friends with benefits.’”
“I said that so I didn’t scare you off. You were still scarred from Roman, I didn’t want to rush you into anything. But just know... it was always all or nothing for me.”
I nodded, biting my lip because if I didn’t, the tears would spill once more.
“When I found out Celeste was pregnant with my child, the first thing I knew I had to do was provide a safe and loving home for the baby. And in my head, I thought that entailed having to marry Celeste. I wasn’t thinking straight. Just because I marry Celeste doesn’t mean it would be a happy union. I guess I also feared you wouldn’t want anything else to do with me if I had a child with some other woman, so it was more like a defense mechanism.” Hawk took my hand in his and worked gentle circles with his thumb. “I see how I hurt you, and these last few days I’ve done nothing but think about you. Above all this shit, you were always my number one thought.”
“Me too,” I confessed. “Do you still think Celeste is telling the truth?”
He shook his head. “I’m starting to have my doubts.”
“Why?”
“She won’t let me come for the scans. She won’t allow me to see the paperwork from the doctor. Basically, whenever I ask her, she changes the subject.”
“She’s using you?”
“There’s a high chance.”
“Leave it with me.”
Hawk frowned, bemused. “Britta Valentino, what do you have up your sleeve?”
I smiled back as I considered my ingenious plan.
“What about the other problem with this.... um... Rita?”
Hawk dragged a hand over his exhausted face. “I have no idea where this one has sprung from. I should have given more thought to all those appearances she made. People are turning on me, Britta. People I once considered friends. Those who saw us at the party are saying it had to be true because they saw us kissing. It’s almost like she...” he paused, “... staged everything, and made sure there were witnesses.”
A thought struck me. “What if she did?”
“For what benefit?”
“I don’t know what her motive would be. Maybe she has something to do with Roman or someone who wants something from you, or is holding a grudge?”
Hawks stood up and started to pace. “Plenty of those people.” I could understand his annoyance over it. Hawk Carnage was a wealthy man, and his fortune continued to grow every day.
“Anyone recently?”
He stopped pacing and faced me head on, his expression a mixture of revelation and fury.
“David Renshaw.”
We left Ricky’s under the promise we’d both return and face my brothers’ questioning over our relationship. Ricky still seemed bamboozled by it, Harry was irritated and Slate, my know-it-all brother, sat back with a smirk on his face and watched the drama unfold.
Once we arrived back at Hawk’s penthouse, we sat in his office eating the Chinese takeout we’d grabbed on the way here and drinking whiskey. It was Hawk who had introduced me to it, and the flavor had grown on me.
“Why are you helping me, Britta?” Hawk asked, watching me intently. “I hurt you so much, so why help me?”
“Someone handsome and intelligent once told me that we had each other’s back. Always. So here I am, watching his back.”
He wrapped his hand around my neck and pulled to his lips. “You’re fucking too good for me.”
“If we keep believing in each other, we can beat the people who are trying to destroy you. One by one, we’ll take them down.”
With only the light of the computer and desk lamp illuminating the otherwise dark room, we theorized a few possible scenarios until we narrowed it down to one.
Rita Waltsworth was connected to David Renshaw.
It made sense.
A few weeks ago, Hawk had been receiving a constant stream of emails and phone calls from the Renshaw’s propositioning him.
They wanted to buy Carnage Lingerie.
That was no secret.
Hawk, however, wasn’t interested in listening to any negotiations or takeovers. In response to the constant pestering, Hawk threatened to pull his line from the Renshaw department stores. This incensed David Renshaw who began retaliating with threats of his own unless Hawk attended a meeting in San Antonio.
Then Celeste happened.
Hawk got distracted and he sent me to be a buffer.
“I’m sorry that happened, Britta. There were a few reasons why I did what I did. To
give you time away from me so you could see what kind of scumbag asshole I was for hurting you, and to show Renshaw I don’t give two fucks about his business proposition. Was he mad?”
“Livid.”
“Good.”
But Renshaw had obviously sent his hounds out to do his dirty work quite earlier on, in case negotiations fell flat on their face.
The biggest, most vicious hound of all? Rita Waltsworth.
What better way to ruin a lingerie magnate’s reputation than by filing sexual assault claims against him. Customers would retreat. They’d shy away from wearing intimate apparel seemingly marred by rape. It was perfect slander. And the worst.
“How do we prove she has anything to do with it?” I asked, feeling this was in a league of its own.
“Leave it with me,” Hawk said with a wink.
“Hawk Carnage... what tricks do you have up your sleeve?”
He leaned forward, gently kissing my lips. The fire within me reignited. Hawk lingered, dragging me back into his world. I was more than happy to go.
When he pulled away, he said, “Carnage, baby. I’m about to cause some carnage.”
Chapter 23
Britta
“Is she here?” I asked Sara as I walked into Hawk Industries. I waited anxiously until she ended her call and she looked at me all smiles.
“She’s already down in the studio.”
“And the others?”
“All are there.” Her smile turned wicked. “Should I call for backup?”
I laughed, however, it wasn’t such a bad idea. Then I remembered she was pregnant.
“No, this shouldn’t take long.” I stepped back into the lift when I heard my name.
“Britta, I’m cheering for you. Good luck.”
The elevator doors closed, and I prayed the outcome of this experiment turned out in Hawk’s favor. I wouldn’t deny, some selfishness came into play.
The door reopened on the fourteenth floor, and I stepped into the studio which was all set for the pregnancy photo shoot.
“Morning, Britta,” Gerrad greeted, knowingly. He hid his smile behind his camera.
“Morning, Gerrad,” I smiled back. “It’s going to be an awesome day.”
“I’m stoked to play a part in it.”
I made a mental note for Hawk to give our trusted photographer a pay rise.
I crossed over the set to where the models were changing into their selected pieces and having the final stages of makeup done. There were three models, Celeste, Tiffany, and Jason. Tiffany and Jason had already been prepped with the objective and each considering me a friend, and they did not hesitate to go along with the façade. Tiff was five months pregnant and a stranger to Celeste. And Jason? He was one hot spunk of a man who Celeste simply wouldn’t be able to resist sinking her claws into.
“Ladies and gent, how are we this morning?” I greeted, my smile beaming.
They each returned their greeting, all in a good mood.
“I’m just here to watch a bit of the shoot, but I can’t tell you how excited we are to launch this line. With such gorgeous models, in such beautiful states, it’s going to be a winner.”
Celeste’s face lit up, thrilled to be the center of attention once more. As far as she was concerned, there wasn’t anything between Hawk and I, and she saw me only as another employee of Carnage Industries.
“So, I’ll leave you to it and have fun.”
When I turned my back on the model, Gerrad winked. I set about busying myself, helping Kathy with hair and makeup and working the lighting, all the while keeping one eye on Tiffany and Celeste. Tiffany worked her magic, engaging in pregnancy conversations which Celeste happily and eagerly participated in. They shared stories, swapped advice, and once trust had been established, they engaged in the usual gossip between girlfriends. I stayed much longer than anticipated, simply because it took a while for Tiffany to get to the objective, but it was to my advantage. I blended in, and by the time a few shots and lingerie changes had been done, they barely noticed my presence. So, when Tiff and Celeste were helping each other into their new items, I snuck behind the curtain’s change room and listened.
“I’m so worried about Anthony, I’m not sure he’ll be able to care for us,” Tiffany began laying the seeds. “He’s been in a poor paying job for years now. Some weeks he can barely afford gas.”
“Mmhmm,” Celeste agreed. “That’s not a good situation to be in. Let me guess, you’re using all your modeling money to cover his ass.”
“I used to,” Tiffany laughed evilly, and even I was convinced. “But now, I don’t even tell him I have a gig. They have been few and far between being pregnant and all, so whatever I do earn stays in my pocket for when bub is born.”
“Smart move,” Celeste concurred.
Come on... give me something.
“Although, you could be smarter,” she continued.
Yes!
“Oh? How so?”
“Did you ever play around on Anthony... you know... around the time of conception?”
There was a pause, and I prayed Tiffany would continue. Lying like this wouldn’t be easy, even if it were just a narrative.
“I did actually. And let me tell you, this man... he was simply divine. A silver fox with healthy pockets.”
Good work, babe.
“Well, there you have it.” Celeste was elated her advice had the foundations working. “Turn up at Mr. Silver Fox’s workplace rubbing that gorgeous swollen belly of yours and tell him the baby is his.”
“What? No! I can’t do that.”
“Sure, you can. Women do it all the time. It’s called survival, babe.”
“Who’s to say he won’t kick me out?”
“Men have this natural instinct to protect what’s theirs. That extends to their unborn child.” Celeste paused for a moment and giggled. “Girl, your ass is going to be rolling in wealth in no time. No more loaning your man gas money.”
“Loaning? He never gave it back.”
They both laughed, and I hoped the conversation would continue. Tiffany didn’t let me down.
“So, how do you know so much about this? I mean, I don’t want to take this kind of advice if it hasn’t been tried and tested.”
“I can guarantee you it works. I’ve just done it myself.”
Bingo, bitch!
“Say what?”
“Yep. My bubs real father is a deadbeat who can’t hold down a job for more than a month.”
“So why sleep with him?”
Good question. Celeste is gorgeous.
“He’s my high school sweetheart. But being a high school sweetheart, and my baby daddy, are two totally different things. I need a real man to raise and protect my kid. So that’s what I did, I went out and found me my man. And it couldn’t have been easier. They turn to putty in your hands.”
It took all the strength I could muster not to launch through the curtain and crash tackle the bitch to the ground and then pound mercilessly on her face. And then I reminded myself, she’s pregnant. A hand rested on my shoulder and I started with fright. I hadn’t realized I’d been hunched over gripping the curtain. Like a resident sleuth, I was doing my best to remain unseen.
That was until I turned to see him standing there, a smile pulling at his lips.
He took my elbow and helped me straighten.
“You scared the shit out of me,” I whispered.
He leaned in close, so his lips grazed my ear. “I’ve been standing behind you for ages.”
“Pervert.”
“Absolutely. Call her out.” Hawk took my hand in his, and together we waited in front of the curtain.
He’d heard it all.
He’d heard the confession, and a giant weight had been lifted off his shoulders.
And now it was his turn to settle the score.
“Ladies, can I see you both for a moment?”
“Coming,” they both called before the curtain flung open.
Tif
fany immediately walked out of sight, her part of the play now over. Celeste, however, was a different story. She stood, like a deer in headlights, wide-eyed and sprung.
“Here...” Hawk threw her a silk gown and she caught it. “Put it on.”
She did so, looking cautiously through her long lashes. It was then she saw Hawk’s hand holding mine, and she realized her game was up.
“Why be so malicious, Celeste?” I asked.
“I don’t see it as malicious.” Her voice was small. “I want a safe home for my child.”
“You can’t fool a man into believing a kid is his when it’s not. That’s self-serving.”
“Call it what you want.”
“Celeste,” Hawk began his tone even. “I was willing to give up everything I knew to look after the child you told me was mine. I was ready to love it and ensure it had the best family life possible. I’m sure if you told your high school sweetheart he was expecting a child, he too would endeavor to do the same.” Hawk was so calm and collected. Had I been in his situation I inevitably would have lost my shit by now.
Celeste remained quiet... for once.
“You lied to my face. You lied to my friends. You spun your lies so well you had us all convinced it was the truth. So much so, I hurt the woman I love because I second-guessed everything I knew.”
There was a pause and still nothing from Celeste. She reminded me of a school girl caught for stealing.
“Any contracts you have with Carnage Industries will be terminated. As an act of grace and because you’re expecting, I’ll keep this to myself, so it doesn’t affect your future employment.”
“Thank you.” She made moves to quickly retreat.
“And, Celeste...” Hawk stopped her, “... I wasn’t born into a wealthy family and look at everything I’ve achieved. Do right by your child...” There was another pause, and all Celeste could do was look at us both with her doe eyes.
Did she expect a handout?
Did she expect us all to hug and sing Kumbaya together?
“You need to get changed and leave. Immediately,” Hawk instructed.
Nodding her head, she disappeared into the change room.
Hawk pulled me away until far enough out of earshot. “I’ve got to go and deal with problem number two.”