by Jill Sanders
“You saw Marcus and Susan on my bed. Believe me. I must have walked in a few minutes after you did. I spent a few minutes cussing them out for defiling my space.”
When he smiled this time, she felt her heart skip then sink into her stomach when his words finally penetrated her mind. “But…” Her chin fell. “You…” Her head shook from side to side as the realization hit her.
He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. “All this time…”
She straightened her shoulders and then pushed him away. It didn’t matter. It would have never worked. She didn’t belong in Spring Haven, just like he didn’t belong in Carrabelle.
“It doesn’t matter anyway. It never would have worked out.” She slammed open the cash register and stuffed all the cash into the bank bag, and then bent over to shove it all in the safe.
“Why?” The simple question hung in the air.
She turned quickly towards him and frowned. “Because we’re…” She couldn’t say it. The word related was like a curse to her, even after all this time.
“Adopted?” He smiled. “There’s no blood between us.” He crossed his arms over his chest.
She felt all the blood drain from her face and swayed a little. Oh, how untrue that statement was.
“Easy.” He frowned and started walking towards her. She held up her hand quickly and leaned against the counter.
“No, don’t.” She took a few breaths to clear her head.
He nodded and then dropped his hands by his sides. “Missy.” Hearing him use his nickname for her sent a wave of lust straight to her bones. “We were adopted into a wonderful family. Raised as brother and sister, but we both know…” He took a step towards her again, slowly. “We never felt that way about one another.” Her eyes met his. “Never.”
“Roman.” It came out as a whisper. “I…” She shook her head, not sure what to say.
“Why?” The word this time was almost an accusation.
“Why, what?” She felt her shoulders hunch.
“Why did you stay away?” His voice seemed distant. Angry. She knew she deserved every ounce of his anger. Especially after finding out it hadn’t been him that night, all those years ago.
She shook her head and rolled her neck, trying to release all the negative energy. “I don’t know. I guess I was hurt. Angry.” She looked at him. “Scared.”
“Of what was between us?” He’d moved closer to her.
She nodded slightly. When he moved to touch her, she backed up and held her hands between them. “No.” The simple word made him stop. “I can’t have you touching me.”
“Why?” He frowned, but nodded. “Why not come back?”
She felt almost hysterical. “Why?” She repeated the word, letting it roll off her tongue. “So many different reasons.” She jerked her arms around, waving them around like a mad person. “This place, my place. My house, my car. My life.” She turned towards him. “I have a home here. I’ve made something from nothing. All by myself.”
He nodded. “I’m not asking you to give it all up. Just come back. Visit.”
She sighed and then rubbed the side of her head with her fingers. It was starting to pound and she wanted nothing more than to escape again. The guilt was too much. She knew that. All those years she’d thought about returning to Spring Haven. All those day’s she’d desperately wished to see her sister and other brothers again.
“Missy, there’s nothing stopping you,” he whispered.
“Yes.” She nodded. “Everything is stopping me. I have to go.” She glanced at the clock. “I’ll tell Jenny you’ve left. I’m sure she’ll be able to find someone—”
“No.”
“What?” She frowned and glanced at him.
“I’m not leaving unless you come with me.” He crossed his arms over his chest, a move she remembered too well.
She laughed. “Then you’d better settle in.” She walked over to the door with her purse and keys in hand, waiting for him to follow her. She flipped off the lights as he walked out of the store and locked the door with her key.
“I plan on it,” he said behind her. When she turned around, he shocked her by taking her into his arms and laying his lips quickly over hers.
There was anger, fear, and desperation behind the move, and she felt every ounce of emotion that crossed between them until, finally, she settled on the pure enjoyment of the moment. His mouth slanted over hers, sending heat all the way to her toes. She’d forgotten what it felt like. Being held, kissed, touched.
When he slowly pulled away, she was sure he would be able to see her body vibrating. Instead of smiling at her weakness, like he used to so many years ago, he frowned and watched her closely, waiting for her to respond.
When she could finally think again, she asked, “Where are you staying?” She tried to get herself under control as he answered..
“The motel a few blocks away.” He nodded down the street. He looked so calm, like the kiss hadn’t affected him as much as it had her. Hurt and anger started to spread throughout her again.
She laughed harshly. “Which one?”
He shrugged his shoulders. “The blue one.”
If he could act so calm, then she should be able to shake that kiss off as quickly as he had.
“First customers arrive at seven.” She turned and started walking down the stairs, feeling proud of herself for holding it together.
“Wait.” He rushed after her. “Why don’t I walk you home?”
She shook her head, not wanting to look at him.. “I drove.” She motioned to her car and watched his eyebrows shoot up.
He walked over and ran a finger over the paint. “This…is yours?”
She smiled, feeling proud that at least now he was showing jealousy. Then she crossed her arms over her chest and frowned at him as he held his hands out for the keys. She frowned and just looked at him.
“Oh, come on!” He smiled, showing off a dimple near his mouth that she remembered too well. “You know that’s my dream car. How could you do this to me and not let me drive her?”
She chuckled. “Her?” She shook her head and then smiled. “You’re a grown man now.” She felt her face heat when she realized just how grown he was and how that kiss had started something inside her. “Get used to disappointments.” She walked around him, jumped behind the wheel, and turned the key. Just for kicks, she revved the engine a little before putting it in reverse.
She glanced at him and watched his eyes almost water as she peeled out of the parking spot.
***
Roman watched his dream car and woman disappear and felt his heart jump with excitement.
Not until her brake lights disappeared did he feel like he finally had his heart back under control. He stood in the balmy night, letting the bugs swarm around him as he stood under the parking light, replaying everything that had just happened.
What he wanted to do was jump in his car, which was parked two blocks away, and follow her to make sure she wasn’t going to pack up and leave once more.
Deciding she had too much at stake this time, he turned towards his hotel and slowly walked the few blocks, trying to calm himself down. Why was she being so secretive? Why wouldn’t she come home? What was keeping her away from the family that loved her?
He stopped off at the small family-owned restaurant next to his hotel and grabbed a burger. The place was packed with at least a dozen people who were crammed into a place built for only thirty. He sat along the old-time bar and wolfed down his burger and fries, and then he topped it off with a milk shake, since the family next to him was enjoying them and they looked delicious. He wasn’t disappointed.
When he’d been young, there had been a place like this in Surf Breeze on the boardwalk. Now it was a yoga place. Shaking his head, he watched the families interact. He loved small towns. The feeling that everyone knew everyone else, the welcoming sense you got as you walked through a door and someone called out your name. Even if you were in a hurry
to get dinner to go, you always had time to stop and talk to someone you knew.
He couldn’t stop the memories coming as he watched the scene. Even though his family had been duct taped together, it had held strong. Until Marissa had shattered it when she’d left all those years ago.
When he finally strolled into his hotel room, he realized he was exhausted from the long day in the sun.
His dream started like they always did when he dreamed about Marissa—on the day he met her.
***
“Give it back!” Cole said over and over again as he jumped, trying to get the small book from Roman’s hands, which were stretched as high as he could get them above his head. The recent discovery that he had grown a few inches taller than Cole had filled him with delight. And in the last few weeks, he’d done everything he could to annoy his younger brother, whom he’d just met for the first time a little under a year ago.
Even though the makeshift family wasn’t related by blood, that didn’t stop any of them from acting like it. The three boys got along better than most of the other siblings in their school. He supposed it had to do with who they lived with.
The Graytons were gold. Not only did Mark, their old man, and Elizabeth, their new mother, show them nothing but patience and kindness, but Julie—Mark and Elizabeth’s daughter—was like a second mother to them all. Julie was the one who really spent most of her time with Roman.
He wasn’t sure why she treated him differently than the others. But he’d needed that attention when he’d first arrived.
His body had been badly damaged. He’d had a cast on and more cuts and bruises than he’d ever had before.
“Julie!” Cole stopped jumping and crossed his arms over his small chest. Then he jerked his head to the side to push his wild mass of hair away from his eyes. The kid’s blonde hair was longer than Julie’s at this point.
“Get a haircut,” Roman groaned as he handed over the book and stuck out his tongue.
Cole never could play fair. He knew that Roman’s weakness was seeing the disappointment in Julie’s eyes as she scolded him. Just the fear of it always caused him to cave.
“Go climb a tree,” Cole shot back and raced off.
Just then they heard a car drive up. When he rushed to the windows that overlooked the front yard, he was happily surprised to see Lilly’s silver sedan bump up the driveway.
“It’s Lilly!” he shouted out to everyone in the house as he raced down the stairs, wanting to be the first one out the door to greet their new sister.
It was all everyone had been talking about for the last three days, ever since Elizabeth had gotten the call from Lilly, their guardian angel. Or so she liked to be called because she worked for the state and helped find lost kids new homes.
She’d saved his butt, along with Marcus’s and Cole’s. The three boys owed the woman more than they could ever repay.
When he reached the front porch, his breath caught in his throat and he felt a stabbing pain shoot straight to his gut.
There, standing before him, was another angel, one his size, dressed in a soft pink dress with white flowers and a pink bow tied around her waist. Her yellow hair flowed around her shoulders, going almost all the way down to her knees. It looked softer than he ever knew was possible.
“Oh, there’s one now. Roman, this is your new sister, Marissa.”
He blinked a few times, instantly hating the word sister.
Her caramel eyes met his, then her chin dropped along as she looked at his feet. He’d been in such a hurry to be the first one out the door that he’d forgotten to put on his shoes. Normally that wouldn’t have mattered, but since they’d spent the entire morning getting dressed up in their church clothes to meet their new sister, he supposed he looked funny in a suit with no shoes.
Glancing down, he wiggled his toes and frowned. “I forgot my shoes,” he said, looking back up at Lilly, who only laughed.
“I’m sure you’ll find them around somewhere. Is anyone else home?”
He nodded quickly, then stood aside and opened the front porch door. “They’re probably in the kitchen. We’ve made a big dinner for her.” He nodded and noticed that Marissa’s eyes were still glued to his feet.
“Well, I’ll just go on back. Roman, why don’t you show Marissa around.” Lilly said.
“Sure,” he said, not really paying attention to Lilly as she disappeared down the hallway.
“You want to look around?” he asked, shoving his hands into his pockets.
She slowly shook her head from side to side, her eyes still fixed on the floor.
“You can talk, can’t you?” he asked after a minute.
She nodded her head.
“Well,” he sighed and glanced around. “This is the front porch. We hang out here a lot ever since Marcus and I rebuilt it.” His chest puffed out a little when the pride hit him. He still couldn’t believe how great it had turned out.
He watched her eyes move up and over the large space. Then she blinked and he watched in horror as a tear escaped.
“Hey.” He took a step back. “Don’t do that.” He frowned as another one fell onto the new flooring.
She shook her eyes and started wiping the tears that were flooding out now.
“Did someone hit you?” he asked, moving closer.
She glanced at him and shook her head no.
“Well, then, count yourself lucky.” He was so close to her now, he could smell the slight hint of sweet flowers on her. “You sure do smell good,” he mumbled, not realizing he’d said it out loud.
Her eyes met his and he watched her blink away the tears as she watched him.
“I…” She closed her eyes. “I was getting married.”
He blinked a few times and then chuckled, thinking she was making a funny joke.
She frowned and her eyes moved back to the floor.
“That’s a funny one.” He moved to tap her on the shoulder, only to have her pull away quickly. “Hey.” He frowned. “We don’t hit here.” He moved closer to her and tilted his head as he watched her. “You’re serious?” His voice squeaked. “Really?”
She glanced up at him, tears falling again. Then she bolted.
For a girl, she sure could run fast. They were almost all the way to the lake before he caught up with her. He grabbed her arm and yanked her to a stop. “Easy!” he said, holding her still, only to have her shiny black shoes rise up and kick him square in the shins, shins that had seen many bruises in the past.
“Ouch!” He hopped up and down on his good leg while still holding her. “Why’d you go and do that?”
“You…” She cried out. “You don’t know anything. You’re just a stupid boy!” Her face was almost beet red as more tears poured from her eyes.
“Well, sure I am. And you’re a stupid girl.” He smiled and nodded his head, feeling accomplished.
She glared back at him. “Let go of me!” she screamed in his face. He dropped his hands.
“Don’t kick me.” He took a step back when she made a move. She just glared back at him.
“I don’t like boys. I never want to be around another one for as long as I live.” She crossed her arms over her chest.
He laughed. “Well, then you’re going to have a very boring life. Boys are a lot of fun. Besides, you’ve got three brothers now.” He leaned closer and whispered. “You can’t avoid us.”
Chapter Four
Roman’s alarm woke him from the dream, so he rolled out of bed, wishing he’d had a few more hours of sleep.
Pulling on a clean pair of swim trunks and a tank top, he slipped into his shoes as he made his way out the door. He could get used to the easy life. Not that he didn’t love wearing his normal attire of suits and ties. But, underneath it all, he had always loved the ease of beach shorts and flip-flops.
When he walked up to the store, he frowned when he didn’t spot Missy’s red beauty in the parking lot.
The bell chimed when he walked in and he smiled an
d sighed with relief when she called from the back room, “Be there in a minute.”
Making his way to the back, he was rewarded when he walked into the supply room and bumped solidly into the back of her. She’d climbed up a small stepladder and had both of her arms over her head, holding a large box. It didn’t look heavy, just awkward.
Instantly, his hands reached out and steadied her before she fell from the perch. Her hips were smaller than he remembered and he had a nice view of her backside, which he didn’t want to give up just yet. Holding her still, he felt her stiffen when his fingers tightened on her hips.
“I’m fine,” she said without turning around. “You can let go of me now.”
“Can’t.” It came out as a whisper and he closed his eyes for just one moment. When he felt her move in his arms, his eyes opened and he watched her set the box down on the shelf. His fingers tightened for just a moment before he released her so she could turn around.
“What are you doing here?” she asked, looking down at him.
“I’m here for you.” His voice had fled and he sounded like he’d just run a marathon. His breathing was uneven and his chest rose and fell quickly as he tried to keep in check.
She shook her head from side to side slowly. “I… I can’t do this.” She moved to take a step away from him. His hands went automatically to her hips again, keeping her steady on the small ladder.
“Easy,” he frowned.
“Roman,” she started to say just as the bell chimed. She blinked a few times and then pulled away and walked out of the small supply room without saying anything more.
Gripping the shelves, his knuckles turned white as he prayed that he’d be able to convince her.
He’d dreamed of a million ways to talk her into returning home. To his family. To him. But every time she was around him, none of them came to mind.