by Guy Haley
Out the back of the motel, the groundcar's windows went black. Broadcasting fake Gridsigs for Lehmann, Otto, Valdaire and Chures, it reversed out of its parking bay and headed off at high speed. Otto smiled as Chloe picked up a trio of airbikes lifting off and heading in pursuit.
"Do we go now?" asked Valdaire. She felt sick. She hadn't liked blasting the van; there were men inside. She'd killed many, she supposed, back in the war days, Otto was right about that, but he'd also been wrong; it had just been button pushing, easily dealt with if she didn't think about it. She'd never really squared it with her conscience. If she thought about it, it brought her too close to the men who scarred her hands, so she didn't. Maybe that made her worse than the cyborg. He clearly was bothered by it.
"Wait," said Otto. "Is the area clear?"
"Yes," said Valdaire.
"Then detonate the others."
Valdaire checked them quickly for human occupants. None. A street's worth of cars, dancing round each other as their onboard systems communicated and attempted to bring order to their escape, exploded one after the other.
"That will do it," said Otto.
Sirens.
"OK," Otto said, and ushered Valdaire out of the room. Chloe invaded the building's survnet sensors as they hurried to a side door in the building, scrubbing their presence from the recordings. "We're leaving now."
The noise of emergency vehicles, police and machines filled the night, lights sparkling in the rain. What little Gridwidth remained was clamped down, swamped by the informational traffic of AI and human emergency services.
Lehmann and Chures joined them on the street.
"Messy," said the VIA agent. "But effective."
"Kaplinski will not dare to make a move now," said Otto, looking up at the rooftops. "He's still watching. We need to lose ourselves, quickly."
CHAPTER 8
Circus
On the island it was as if the Terror had never happened nor ever would. Birds sang, plants rustled in the breeze and the sun shone, framed by a rag of blue sky that wavered uncertainly in the void. Richards marvelled at it, wandering round, prodding the ground with a stick. "This is a data artefact," he said to Bear. "One of those little bits that gets left behind when files are overwritten. I never thought I'd be standing on one, nor that I'd find one quite so… lush."
The island dwindled. With regularity pieces fell away into the void, tinkling as they went to nothing. A wall of black vapours streamed from its edges. Discomfited by this, Bear and Richards made their way inwards. There, at the heart, they found a glade around a spring from where they could not see the void, and felt a little safer.
"Good day," said an old man in the clearing.
"All right there," said Bear. "You got any cigarettes?"
Richards sat on a stump as the man handed the bear a soggy roll-up.
"Ah! A fag!" said Bear. "Thanks. If they were mine, I wouldn't go handing them out willy-nilly, none left anywhere now." Bear talked quietly. "Silly tramp."
"You should be a bit more respectful," said Richards mischievously. Surviving death had lightened his mood. "Did you never listen to the stories you had to tell your owner?"
"Don't talk to me about that little bastard. A decade and a half in a box, remember?" said Bear. The tramp lit his cigarette. "Watch the fur," grumbled Bear, "my manufacturers skimped on the flame retardant."
"This world has something of the fairytale about it," said Richards, "and in fairytales you should always help out strange old men in woods."
"The boy speaks truth!" muttered the old man. "It's often the way, often the way." His chuckle tailed off into a racking smoker's cough. Richards and Bear waited till he'd hawked up a handful of brown phlegm. "Sadly for you I'm not a fairy. The name's Lucas, although I was once Lord of Fendool, the capital of the outer realms of Hyberboroon."
"Ah," said Richards, pleased at this proof of his theory. "One of the Reality Realm RealWorld games. Number three, I think."
"What happened?" said Bear, sniffing at the tramp suspiciously.
"I do not know. One moment I was lord of all I surveyed, next darkness, and then…"
"The Flower King," said Bear and the tramp together. Bear gave Richards a meaningful look. "See?"
"Yes. Exactly. Ever since then I've been rather down on my luck."
"Aren't we all?" said Bear, and blew an extravagant smoke plume.
Richards watched the toy and the tramp smoke. No one had smoked in decades. "Who would build something like this, and why?" he wondered aloud. "And why is k52 trying to destroy it? It still doesn't make any sense."
"I've no idea," said the bear. "I'm just a bear, and I'm following orders."
• • • •
The black had a physicality to it, a presence that lurked outside the circle of sunlight. Despite this, Richards took to standing by the edge, watching fragments of Optimizja float by as he thought. A stand of wheat, a scarecrow in the centre with a face fit for tragedy; an ancient waystone; the corner of a kitchen; a pub table; a half-dead chestnut full of rooks, roots exposed to the nothing. Particles of the dead kingdom that held a resonance so strong it caressed the corners of their island like the wake from a boat as they passed, and that is why Richards supposed they persisted.
All were much smaller than their refuge, and all were dissipating. At first they passed several every day, then one or two, then none.
Night came and went normally on the island, as if the little kingdom of Optimizja were still whole and they could not quite see the rest of it, and they became used to moonlight and sunshine from orbs they could not always see. Days passed. Nothing happened. Richards made a long list of all the things he hated about being almost human: sleeping, itching, sneezing, being smelly, being hungry, being sad, being frightened and all the other things he could pretend to experience at home but could always turn off. Shitting came right at the top of his least favourites. He hated the process; it made his stomach crawl, which in itself was damn revolting. With limited access to water he felt he could never get his ridiculous human arse clean, and became self-conscious there was a lingering smell of shit on him.
There was little for them to do but sleep and eat the island's abundant supply of inquisitive grey squirrels. These soon grew less abundant and inquisitive, and the island fell silent.
Richards was tired but not sleeping. Like so much else, he found sleep an annoying imposition, and avoided it until his eyes were drooping, even though to do so made him feel irritable. He spent more time at the edge of the island, away from the bear and the tramp, who spent their time swapping improbably dirty stories. His limited grasp of the underlying architecture of the rogue realm, which he'd come to refer to as Reality 37, slackened, and he became despondent. He tried yoga, meditation, more sleep deprivation, anything he knew of that humans used to get inside their own heads, searching for the faint Gridsigs of his lost brothers and sister, but they remained elusive, and Richards was stuck in his made-up head with no one but himself for company. Days passed.
A note sounded strong and sad in Richards' isolated mind. His eyes snapped open. Richards leapt up and fell over about as fast, for he'd fallen asleep in the lotus position and his feet had gone numb. He swore the worst way he could in as many languages as he could remember, rubbed the life back into his limbs and tried again. He spun round and round, stopping at that quadrant of the compass where the note sang strongest. A Gridsig. Excited, Richards squinted into the dark, straining his eyes. Nothing.
"Fucking people," he said, wishing for a robot body that didn't fart and sweat and that could see further than half a mile. "Fucking eyes."
He caught sight of a few twinkles of light far out in the dark, lights that grew brighter as another island hove into view like a pleasure steamer, silent and gaudy, bedecked with strings of coloured bulbs. The lights wound round a hill, following a path through an orchard to a pagoda at the top. On the roof of the structure was a device like a colliery wheel. A cable of gargantuan proporti
ons ran up from inside the tower and over the wheel, hanging slackly horizontal as it disappeared off into the dark.
From there the Gridsig broadcast its unique song, obscured, tampered with and corrupt, undisguisable nonetheless.
"Pollyanna," he said.
On the larger island it was night also, and the bulbs cast motley shadows on the path as they stirred in the wind. A smell of food came with it.
Richards staggered as their island crashed into the other. It came free, snagged once again and came to a hard halt.
"Tsk," said Bear, joining Richards, "how tasteless. But check that out." He pointed to the wheel at the top. "That's a pylon station, that, a way back to Pylon City."
Richards looked at him, "And?"
"They're all over!" said Bear, waving his arms around. "All lead to Pylon City. It's what carries the network, and people too, you'll see."
"You're sharing this information with a prisoner?" said Richards.
Bear harrumphed and folded his massive arms. "I'm beginning to believe you're not some kind of spy, sunshine, everyone knows that. Come on!" he added, smacking his lips. "Something smells dee-licious!" His long snout twitched. His eyes became animated. "Pork. It's pork! Let's check it out. I'm sick of squirrel."
"I'll come too," said the tramp, appearing from a bush, rubbing his hands. "That food smells divine!"
The island had come to a rest by an ornate jetty jutting out over the nothing. Tatty paper lanterns illuminated it. No vapours rose from the edge of this island.
"Hey!" warned Richards. "There's a Five up there, and something is not right." But the bear and the tramp were not listening; they were already hurrying off the jetty where a pair of stone lions guarded a pair of iron gates, the bear's twitching nose high in the air.
"Halt!" said a bored voice. "State your business."
"What was that?" said the tramp.
"That," said Bear, pointing at the lions, "was them."
"They're stone, ignore them," said the tramp. "Come on, I'm starving."
"They're not stone," said Richards. Lions. One looked a hell of a lot like a non-robotic version of the Tarquinius avatar of Reality 36. A cut-and-paste job. And he thought that that was not the way an AI would have built this creation.
The lions' smooth grey skins shuttered between light and dark, abruptly turning into the rough yellow of lion pelt. They stretched and yawned, displaying fangs of dazzling ivory.
"Ahhhh," said the larger of the pair. "That's better. I do so loathe it when Circus keeps us petrified for too long. It is neglectful and cruel."
"Positively inhumane, Tarquin dear," said the other. A luxurious shiver ran the length of its body as it stretched. "If I had a phone I'd call the RSPCA."
"I'm not sure they cater for the likes of us, Clarence," said the other.
"Ahem," said Bear.
"Oh, do go away," said the first lion. "We really can't be bothered with visitors today. Come back tomorrow, yes. Tomorrow." Its skin flickered to grey and back. It shook out its mane.
"I'm on business of the Lord of Pylon City," said Bear. "Let us in, I need to make use of your pylon station. That's an order, by the way."
"Oh, really?" said Clarence. "Well, in that case, can they come in?"
"No, Clarence," said Tarquin, pacing around on his plinth. "No, they most assuredly cannot."
"Righty-ho," said Bear, and kicked open the gates. "Sod you then, I'm through trying to be polite. There's a way back to my boss and food to be had and I'm wanting to eat it."
"We could always eat you," said Clarence as Bear marched through the gate.
Bear jabbed a huge claw at it. "Yeah," he said, "and I could always eat you. What do you think of that, eh?"
"Tough talk, dearie. Though there are two of us and only one of you."
Richards stepped forward. "Isn't there someone you could call?"
"Yes, there is," said Tarquin, leaning forward on its plinth so its nose nearly touched Richards'. "But I'm not going to."
"Oh, Tarquin, for pity's sake, stop teasing him. Ask them the riddle and then we can get this beastly business over with."
"Yes," said Tarquin. "And when they get it wrong, we can eat them."
"And if we get it right we can come in?" said Lucas.
"Nobody ever does," said Tarquin.
"Shoot," said Bear, "I'm hungry."
"So are we, dear. Shall I?"
"Be my guest," said Tarquin.
"Very well," Clarence placed itself in a stiff seated position. "Answer this, if you please: What creature speaks with one voice, has four legs in the morning, two legs in the afternoon and three legs in the evening?" The lions eyed them hungrily, tails swishing in anticipation of a three-course meal.
"Er," said Lucas.
"I'm stumped," said Bear.
"The answer," said Richards, "is man. As a child, he crawls. As an adult, he walks erect. As an older man he requires a stick."
"Oh, get him!" said the big lion. "Someone knows his classical mythology, doesn't he?"
"Yeah," said Richards. "I was lucky enough to get an education. Now let us in, you cut-rate sphinxes."
The smell was getting stronger. Bear was drooling and Lucas was dancing from foot to foot with a strange look in his eyes. Richards' stomach rumbled, which took him by surprise, and he found that his mouth was watering.
"Cut-rate, are we? Don't think you're coming through," said the big lion. "Let me tell you something, little man, less impressive than the offspring of Typhon and Echidna we may be to your eyes, but we still have big teeth." He bared them, and rumbled.
The smaller lion assumed the pose once again. "One of us always tells the truth, one of us always lies…"
"I got the riddle right," said Richards.
"Not so clever now, eh, old chap? We, I'm afraid, have full control over riddling rights round here. As you're such a blessed smart-arse you can answer three riddles. One for the each of you."
Clarence waited patiently for Tarquin to finish. A nod from the large lion set off his litany once more. "One path leads to certain death, the other to salvation…"
"And pork?" asked Bear, eagerly.
"And pork," sighed the lion. "How do you find out which way to go?"
"Sheesh, you're awful!" said Richards. "Everyone knows the answer to these. They're rubbish!"
Lucas and Bear looked at each other guiltily.
"Wooooo!" said the lion. "Catty! Go on then, mastermind, what's the answer?"
Richards shook his head.
"Answer," purred the lion.
Richards pulled a face, but answered anyway. "I'd ask one of you, 'What would the other one of you say if I asked him the way to salvation?'"
"More," said the lion warily.
"If I asked that question of the liar he would tell me the opposite of what his fellow actually would say, as he always lies. If I asked the truthful one, he would tell me the truth, which is to say, the liar's lie. Both would indicate the road of instant death, so I'd naturally take the other. For fuck's sake, this really is schoolboy stuff."
"Alright!" growled the bigger lion. "Clarence! Another."
"Are you just going to ask us questions until we get one wrong, and then eat us?" said Richards. "Because that's a big waste of time for everyone."
"That is the general idea, yes," said Tarquin.
"Thought as much." Bear strode forwards. Crossed paws barred his way, claws popping from their sheaths.
"Not so fast," warned Clarence with a silky growl. "You have two choices. We can ask you lots of annoying questions until you fail and we eat you." It had a most disagreeable manner. "Or we can just eat you."
Bear rolled his eyes. "I've had enough of this!" He grasped Clarence by the scruff of the neck and pitched the lion like a hay bale into the darkness.
"Bounddddeerrrrrrr!" came a faint cry, and the lion was no more.
Bear turned to eyeball Tarquin. "I'll give you a riddle: What shouldn't you do to Bear?" He wagged his paw inches from
Tarquin's face, beans rattling madly. "The answer? Don't piss Bear off, especially when there's meat involved." Tarquin sneered but wisely turned back to stone. "I thought so. C'mon, boys! It's dinner time!" He marched on, Lucas scampering after, Richards reluctantly following. Pl'anna's Gridsig sang loud then faded to nothing, intensifying again as they drew closer to the pavilion, as did the smell of roasted meat, and Richards' hunger.
Up, the path went, round the conical hill. Their feet were eager on the steps. Bear led the way as the strengthening smell of pork began to drive him wild. Lucas was muttering to himself and licking his lips. Richards tried to clear his mind, but the need to eat the meat was overpowering, and it disgusted him.