by Nikki Turner
“Can you see if she’s here yet?” Me-Ma craned her neck trying to look clear to the back of the church, many rows back and passed a lot of heads, many fitted with fancy hats that could cause a scene at the Kentucky Derby. Simone did a quick look back even though deep down she already knew that her mother would be a no show. She hadn’t gotten excited about seeing her mom at church because she knew better than to get her hopes up. She did feel bad for Me-Ma though because no matter how many times Deidra disappointed her, she always kept her hopes up and was destined once again to be let down.
“She’s not here,” she told her grandmother, again.
“This sure is wonderful,” Me-Ma smiled feeling so grateful to have three of her four granddaughters there. It was still early so she felt hopeful that Deidra was only running late and would arrive shortly. Her daughter had never been on time for anything.
“Me-Ma, she’s not coming,” Simone wanted to be realistic and tried to soothe her grandmother’s disappointment early. Plus she did not want to spend the entire service checking for her mother whom she figured was laid up somewhere with her latest looser because that was her mother’s type.
“She said that she would be bringing this new fellow, Lenny.”
“There is always a new ‘fellow’ or two,” Tallhya who had been listening chimed in. Her head and neck going every which way.
“I don’t see how you can have anything to do with her Me-Ma. She stole your money and ran out. She’s not gonna show up ’til that money is gone.” Now whether she was right or wrong, Simone’s tone didn’t sit any better with her grandmother and since she didn’t have children yet she couldn’t understand how she felt. For Me-Ma, it was like the saying goes “a mother’s love is a mother’s love.”
“Don’t you talk like that about your mother! That is my daughter. My chile you’re talking bad about.” Me-Ma’s voice raised and so be it because she didn’t come from this hiding behind your hand whispering generation. She put her stuff right out there and didn’t ever care what anyone had to say. If they weren’t paying her bills they did not get a vote and that included her grandkids. “Just like I love all of you, I love Deidra. You all with your money, money, money ways don’t realize that’s not how God intended it. You can’t put money over people.” Even the choir lowered their voices out of respect for Mrs. Banks preaching. It was Sunday and she sure as hell was giving a sermon. Pastor Cassius must have thought so too because he waved his hand commanding the choir to stop singing, “Precious Lord” mid note.
“Mrs. Banks, you are the elder, me and most of the folks in here want you to have your say. Too often we hush up what the people who have come before us have to say when they’re the ones who can teach us the most lessons. We act as if we have invented loud music, short skirts and falling in love with the wrong people. Fellow church members and visitors you need to listen to your elders. Now Mrs. Banks, would you do us the honor of coming up here to share your message with us?” Me-Ma looked around silent. Then she stood up, ascended the stage and took the mic like that was her job.
“I was telling my granddaughters that I don’t understand this generation one bit. If you don’t know then you will be shocked to learn that when you put anything before God, you will suffer. I’m talking all those fancy Lenny shoes and bags and the stuff you have to spend your money to get.” Well, Mrs. Banks was working herself up into quite a frothy lather and she had that Amen corner going. “You need to listen to what I am saying because God loves you.” People stood up and starting shouting back in agreement. The reactions really got Me-Ma shouting and pointing her fingers. She had worked her whole life to build a strong relationship with the Lord so she knew what she was talking about and she wanted these people to get it.
“God loves you more than you know. Do you get that?” Well, people kept shouting back agreeing with her. “So you cannot put anything before God and you cannot put anything before your family.” Me-Ma took a deep breath sucking in air to expand her lungs before she continued. “Especially those who have strayed from the Lord ’cause those are the ones you need to stay on your knees praying the most for because that is what God would want. When you love someone who has lost their way you never ever give up on them. You nev—” she clutched her hand to her chest. Mrs. Banks’s mouth dropped open as her head started to sway back.
“Me-Ma!” Simone’s voice raised over the stunned silence as her grandmother collapsed onto stage. Pastor Cassius Street rushed over to her first. The congregation, many who were present when the last pastor died, sat there in stunned silence not believing their bad luck to witness yet another heart attack. Simone, Ginger, and Tallhya raced to the stage as their grandmother took her last breath.
-24-
“Ms. Banks, so nice to see you back to work. We all thought you left with the money,” Gray McPearson, a forty-five-year-old workaholic balding manager snidely remarked as she came through the door. His tone couldn’t have been more opposite from the desperate married man hoping to get laid when Simone first interviewed with him. He motioned to her to follow him.
The customers in the bank moved about unaffected by the bank robbery that now was classified as yesterday’s news.
“Mr. McPearson, I need to talk to you about my job.” She started as he flipped through the paperwork on his desk intentionally ignoring her.
“Yes, Ms. Banks,” he began.
“It’s Simone. Please call me Simone,” she took a deep breath trying to get comfortable being back in this place where she almost lost her life.
“Yes, we do need to talk about your job Ms. Banks,” he said coldly. “See, because your first official day on the job coincided with the first robbery this bank has experienced in over six years, I’m feeling a little suspicious of your timing. You undestand why I may be a little suspicious of eveerything, right?” Simone actually felt shocked that he cut so quickly to the point. It was one thing to want to fuck the new black girl because after all she does have multiple degrees from a second tier university, but when she’s suspected of being involved in a bank robbery, well, that just takes things to completely different level.
“I told Detective Dugan everything he needed to know. I could have died in here and you actually think I’m a part of that crime? Are you accusing me of taking part in the bank robbery? Is this because I’m Black Mr. McPearson?” She paused, “Because I am almost positive that if I was a white woman, that thought wouldn’t have even crossed your mind.” She stared at him just waiting for this motherfucker to break some law.
“No, that’s not what I’m saying,” he started to back peddle his ass away from the lawsuit hovering around them.
“Nothing like that has ever happened to me and I wasn’t sure that I would come back to this job. And yes, I knew that it might make me look guilty, but I’m not sure that standing there handing money to the next person holding a gun to my head is the kind of job security that I need.” The last thing she wanted was to be classified as a typical ghetto Black girl.
“Well, all our feelings aside, are you planning to return to your job at the bank or not?” Mr. McPearson asked deciding to drop the accusations and just let the authorities handle it.
“Yes, I am, but I can’t come back tomorrow as planned. I know that the bank offered me a week off, but there’s been a tragedy in my family and I need to take another week.”
“Another week? I can give you until Monday.” He offered not so generously.
“Fine.” She stood up and walked out of the door and was fighting to keep it together as she bumped right into Jackie, the assistant manager.
“You all right?” Jackie held Simone by the arm, leading her away from the offices.
“Not sure you want to be seen with the co-conspirator to the robbery,” Simone warned her as they made their way outside. “But I have been better. A whole lot better,” she admitted to Jackie, the admission also came as the first she made out loud to herself. Since Me-Ma passed she’d been so busy taking care of
everybody else and making the funeral arrangements.
“Honey, all you need for them to be suspicious of you is some extra melanin. That’s why even though I been here a lot longer than the last three managers I ain’t never going to make it past assistant.”
“I’m just so tired.” Simone’s voice matched her emotions, which made Jackie put an arm around her to offer comfort.
“I know sweetheart. But I promise it’s gonna be okay. Just trust in God.”
“He thinks he can insult me by basically accusing me of being a thief? That’s bullshit,” Simone lowered her voice she still heard her father’s words in her ear and did not want to be seen cursing in public.
“Look, those men may have known someone, but it wasn’t from the tellers because we all know that the best day to take this place down is a Friday. That’s when we get the money to cash the Government payroll checks and with the two largest state buildings located a few blocks away that’s a whole lot of money. Hell if they were smart they would have waited until Thursday night at six after the armored truck drops off the money. Honey, right now I’m just glad we survived. How are you holding up sugar?” Jackie asked placing her hand on Simon’s shoulder.
Simone stared at Jackie and contemplated whether or not to be honest about how she was really doing. Jackie had been nice to her from the day they met and she seemed like a good woman. The way Jackie carried herself reminded her of the nice older ladies from church. Right now Simone really needed someone to be nice to her and so far Jackie had been the only one to ask of her well being.
“To be honest Jackie, I’m a shit!” The word had already bounced out of Simone’s mouth before she noticed and too late to stop it, but he was the last person she felt like dealing with today. Detective Dugan stepped out of an unmarked police car and was headed straight toward them. Both women would have had to be blind not to notice him. Plus he had a strong hard body and biceps straining to get out of that shirt that made it hard to look away, too.
“Damn!” Jackie salivated as the detective joined them. “I’m gonna be late from my break.”
“Ladies?” The detective nodded his head in greeting as he reached the two, but really he was focused on Simone.
“Officer, I need to clock back in. If you need to talk to me I’m in my office.” Jackie quickly excused herself and hurried back into the bank trying to beat the clock. Without a legitimate excuse Simone didn’t have any reason to dart away.“ Detective Dugan,” Simone nodded taking out her car keys. As fine as he was though, she kept telling herself that she had way too much on her mind to be thinking about a man right now. But if her father Simon had still been alive and present he would have been the first one to notice how much alike the two men were, but his baby girl couldn’t see it, not yet.
“Ms. Banks, I wondered when you would return to work?”
“Don’t you mean if I was coming back to work?” With everything going on Simone felt particularly prickly and took offense that he would assume anything about her.
“My experience has taught me that most people who experience that kind of trauma in the work place aren’t in a position to just quit their jobs. I’m not saying it’s easy to go back in there, but you do what you have to do. So, not to be presumptuous, but are you coming back to the job?”
“Yes, but I needed to ask for more time off,” she sighed the full heaviness of losing her Me-Ma finally starting to hit. Out of nowhere tears begin to well up in her eyes and before she could get a handle on it they begin to overflow. Before he knew what was happening his chivalry took over and he had wrapped his arms around Simone in an attempt to comfort her. Something about this girl made the normal workaholic detective want to push the job aside and get to know her. He’d been on this force a good ten years and in his thirty-two years of his life he had yet to meet anyone like Ms. Simone Banks and that included the girls he came across at Norfolk State University where he graduated majoring in Criminal Justice.
Simone could not get control of her emotions. With everything that had happened the last few days, it was as if she had reached her breaking point and everything was spilling out of her. Detective Dugan stood there holding her in his arms without saying a word. In this moment even he felt like he was exactly where he was supposed to be; holding this beautiful, fragile woman in his arms. The familiar way the two of them stood their silently together caused a customer to smile as she exited the bank. She assumed they were in the middle of making up after an argument. She couldn’t help, but reminisce of how she and her husband would kiss and make-up back in their younger days. The chuckling sound the woman made as she passed by embarrassed Simone who broke away from the detective. Being a private person this show of emotion was so out of character she didn’t quite know how to recover after her breakdown.
“You all right?” he asked sensing her discomfort. In his line of work, he was used to handling women that were emotionally unstable, but what he wasn’t used to was him feeling so attracted to a woman involved in one of his cases.
“It’s my grandmother, she passed away two days ago and I just, I don’t know I think I’m just—” Her attempt to blow it off failed miserably as Detective Dugan pulled her close again. This time Simone leaned into him letting herself go completely as she closed her eyes listening to his heartbeat. It felt so good if only for a moment to not have to be strong for anyone. The only other man she had ever been able to let herself go like this with was her father. As soon as she started thinking of her dad she completely lost it again as she began to sob while still engulfed in his strong arms.
When she had stopped crying, the detective placed his hands on either side of her cheeks. Even with mascara running down her face and bloodshot eyes, she was still the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. He found himself taking a step back trying to maintain a professional distance, predicated by the fact that Ms. Banks hadn’t been officially cleared of the robbery. Years of investigating perps told him that the reasons she appeared suspect had more to do with six degrees of separation, none of it pointing to her guilt. This made him even more anxious to find whoever had helped to set this up because two dead cops meant somebody was going down for this crime and unless his instincts were way off, he needed to make sure that it wouldn’t be her.
“You all right?”
“Yes, I’m fine. I’m sorry I put you in that predicament. Thank you so much, though. I have to go.” She darted away. He watched Ms. Banks as she got into a car. He made a mental note about the Dodge. Because it was a mighty step down from the Mercedes she had been driving the day after the incident when she came asking for her keys. She looked so out of place in that car which made him wonder what was really going on with this woman. The next thought surprised him. It was that he’d have to find a way to see Simone again, and soon.
-25-
As the church imploded with what seemed like the entire congregation coming to pay their respects to Me-Ma Banks, Simone forced herself to put on a brave face and take charge of everything. She kept herself together and helped her siblings deal with loosing their Me-Ma. She stepped up and made all of the immediate funeral and burial arrangements. Luckily Me-Ma had a life insurance policy that covered all the funeral arrangements. Finally, when she could no longer avoid it she phoned her mother to inform her about Me-Ma’s death. With Deidra’s pockets still full of the money she stole from her own mother Simone knew her mother was too busy spending it to answer or return anyone’s calls. After many failed attempts, Simone decided to leave the message she thought that Deidra deserved, “By the way since you won’t call me back you should know that your mother is dead.”
Simone had been so busy making the arrangements and keeping it together that she felt guilty that she hadn’t taken care of her sisters. Thank God the elders of the church stepped forward to comfort them, but Simone almost burst out laughing when she glanced up to see Ginger being comforted by none other than the speaker for the Lord, Pastor Cassius Street. Simone loved her baby sis to t
he sky, but the way that child could use any tragedy to slip into a straight man’s arms should have been taught in a ‘how to get a man’ class.
“Honey, you all right?” Pastor Street had somehow managed to detach himself from Ginger and was standing next to Simone, as she worked her phone trying to handle all the remaining details concerning her grandmother’s funeral. In response to the flashy man of God hovering nearby she nodded, motioned to the phone and took off. Ginger, that is all you, she thought as she tried once more to reach Bunny who had been MIA the past few days. Where are you? She thought to herself. She was beginning to worry because it wasn’t like Bunny to disappear for so many days without telling anyone at least where she was going. Simone decided as soon as she had a chance she was going to go to Bunny and Spoe’s place in hopes of catching her there.
When Ghostman finally freed Bunny and allowed her to leave, she drove around in a fog not sure where she should go or what she should do. As badly as she wanted to leave with the body of the man she loved as a brother, Ghostman did not give her the option. She thought about calling Simone, but she would probably freak out and call the cops causing a level of trouble Bunny couldn’t escape. She couldn’t go back home to Me-Ma and pretend like nothing had happened. That woman had some kind of psychic power or a sixth sense that explained why none of her girls had ever been able to hide anything from her since they were little children. It was as if she could sense when one of them was in trouble. Bunny knew that she could not hide this from Me-Ma and there was no way she wanted to put her grandmother’s life in danger by telling her what happened. Her grandmother had been through so much, but when it came to Mrs. Banks’s family, Bunny knew nothing could keep her from protecting them or helping them, which was why she couldn’t go home.
The truth was that there was nothing anyone could do for her. Being alive while Tariq had been killed in front of her felt cruel. Bunny had been raised in the church with her sisters and had listened to what happens to the eternal souls of people who commit suicide and as badly as she wanted to end her life she couldn’t do it.