by Sam Mariano
I nod. “If that’s okay.”
“Of course it’s okay. I’m not sure your mom will agree, but…”
I shrug. “I didn’t tell her where I was going. She might figure it out and come pounding on your door, but… she probably won’t this time. She knew I was going out with…”
Oops.
I stop, realizing how poorly I worded that.
“I didn’t mean—”
“I got it,” he says succinctly. “She wouldn’t think it was my house you were sleeping at.”
My heart sinks. I want to argue, but I don’t know how to. That’s pretty much what I’m saying, I just don’t like the way it sounds.
I type out a quick text to my mom apologizing and telling her I fell asleep. I tell her I’m just going to crash here if that’s okay, but I don’t leave her much room to say it’s not. I tell her I’m basically falling asleep while texting, and I’ll see her in the morning.
That won’t be fun to deal with when I get home, but at least now she knows I’m okay.
When I look up at Hunter, I realize there’s even more not fun stuff to deal with tonight. He looks tormented as he stands there, gazing vacantly out the window.
“Hunter, I…”
“You don’t have to lie to me,” he says. “I know I acted like an asshole about it earlier, but… I’ve cooled down. I’m sorry.”
I nod. “I know.”
“If you like him… you can tell me.”
“I don’t. Not like that.”
“It was a date, right? You’re dressed for a date.”
I sigh, shooting the outfit I’m still wearing a nasty look. “No, it wasn’t a date. He told me to wear something sexy.” I cringe, realizing it doesn’t sound any better when I put it that way.
Hunter’s jaw locks. “So you did.”
“It wasn’t like that, Hunter. It was supposed to be a way to get your attention, that’s all. He wasn’t supposed to kiss me. I certainly wouldn’t have slept with him. I was not trying to hurt you, and if I thought he wanted to, I would never have gone along with it. He said he was worried about you, that you were partying too much and blowing off school. He thought it was because of me, and he just wanted to get us talking again. Or, that’s the impression I got.”
Hunter is quiet, so I keep explaining myself.
“I didn’t know he would take it that far. I swear to God, I had no idea what was happening. One minute we were making harmless if irreverent jokes about The Princess Bride, and the next, he had me pinned against your bedroom door and he was kissing me. It happened so fast, Hunter. It was a trick, I fell into it. It meant absolutely nothing to either of us.”
He’s still quiet, but I’ve said all I can say.
My phone buzzes, lighting up and stealing my attention.
Mom texted back, “I’ll come get you. Tell me where you are.”
I slide open the text so I can respond. “I’ll see you in the morning. I’m fine, I promise. Please just go to sleep. We’ll talk tomorrow.”
“Did your mom meet him?”
I look up at Hunter. “No. We were supposed to meet here and just come in together. I guess I wasn’t prompt enough for him, though. He showed up at my house, but he didn’t come in.”
“Yeah, he’s a pushy fucker,” Hunter mutters.
“I noticed.” I look down at the bed.
Hunter is quiet for another moment, then he says, “Are you sure you’re okay?”
I look up at him.
“I mean, he fucking… assaulted you, apparently, and then I…”
“I’m fine,” I say, not letting him finish. “I promise. It was just a kiss, it’s not like he…”
“Raped you,” he says flatly.
The way he says it causes my heart to sink.
Something flutters inside me, something fearful and nervous. Maybe it’s unavoidable when a word like that is floating around in such a tense situation, but the way it makes me feel… I want to crawl out of my own skin.
Doing my best to ward off the unpleasant sensation, I pat the empty side of the mattress. “Why don’t you come back to bed?”
He ignores the invitation. “Did I?”
“No,” I answer quickly, firmly.
“Are you sure? I kind of feel like I did.”
“No.” I pat the bed more adamantly. “Please get back in bed with me.”
He doesn’t move. “Are you saying no because you believe that, or because you think I did, and you don’t want me to feel bad about it?”
“You were angry and hurt, and I completely understand. I would have been, too.”
“Those are excuses, not denials,” he states.
“I didn’t say no,” I say more firmly. “I didn’t ask you to stop.”
His gaze meets mine. “But you wanted me to,” he says flatly. “I know what it looks like when you want it, Riley.” He drops my gaze and looks down. “You didn’t want it.”
“Yes, I did.” I grab his hand, tugging him closer to the bed. “I did. I didn’t want to want it, but I did.”
He shakes his head.
“Please get in bed with me,” I say, a little more desperately. “I’m not mad. You didn’t hurt me.”
He reaches out the hand I’m not holding, touching my face, his etched with regret. “I didn’t mean to.”
My heart aches. “You didn’t,” I promise. Trying to soften the moment and lure him back into safer harbors, I lighten my tone and tell him, “But you do owe me cuddles and pillow talk. You’re 0 for 2 right now, Maxwell.”
He attempts a smile, but it’s a sad one. “Both of those times were mean. What’s wrong with me? I fucking worship you and I can’t stop hurting you.”
Hearing him say that physically hurts. Tears sting unexpectedly behind my eyes. I feel a bit of moisture gathering in the corner of one eye, but I blink it away. I can’t cry. If I cry, he’ll take it as verification that he did hurt me, and he didn’t. What hurts me is his pain, not mine.
“Come here.”
I yank him on the bed with me since he won’t accept my invitations. Once he’s on the mattress, he moves over to his side of the bed, so I crawl up and snuggle in next to him.
“I love you,” I tell him, sliding my arm over his torso and draping a leg over his to get closer to him.
“I love you, too,” he says quietly.
My heart already knew that, so I don’t feel surprised. “Listen, I’m not holding that stuff against you. The Valerie thing, yes, but… the rest wasn’t unforgivable to me. I didn’t say no to you this time because I thought you might not stop if I did, but I wasn’t mad about it, not really. I just… I would have had to be if I told you another line not to cross and then you did it anyway. You can’t keep doing that, Hunter. I can’t believe you respect me if you don’t care about crossing my boundaries.”
“I do,” he says. “I respect you immensely, Riley. There’s no one I respect more. What happened in this bed a few hours ago had nothing to do with not respecting you, I was just… blinded by a jealous rage. I lost control a little bit, and I’m sorry for that. I have a temper, I’m trying to get a better hold on it, but thinking you were going to hook up with him, it set me off.”
“I get that,” I tell him. “I don’t expect you to be perfect, Hunter. I know you’re jealous, I know you have a temper, I know you might get a little out of hand sometimes. I can handle that, but only if even when you get out of hand, you still care about me and respect my boundaries. You don’t get a pass on caring about me because you’re mad.”
“There is never one moment of any given day that I don’t care about you, Riley.”
I nod, sliding my hand up his chest and caressing his hard jaw. “I believe you. And, like I said, you didn’t do anything wrong this time. But next time I tell you no, I need to know you’ll listen. Whatever it’s about—even if you’re mad—when I say no, I mean it.”
Hunter takes my hand and kisses it. “I promise. I’m sorry I put you in a position to m
ake you feel like if you told me no tonight, I wouldn’t have listened.”
“It’s okay,” I tell him, resting my hand over his toned abdomen and cuddling him again.
He’s quiet for a moment, both of us just enjoying being together. Finally, Hunter breaks the silence. “I can’t stand seeing you with other guys, Riley. It makes me crazy.”
“That won’t happen again.”
“No, I know, but… I need to know you’re mine.”
Oh, crap.
Uneasiness gathers in my chest. “Hunter, I know tonight has been intense, but… nothing about our situation has changed.”
Silence. Then, “What do you mean, nothing has changed? We love each other, we can’t stand seeing one another with anybody else… Come on, Riley. There’s an easy fucking solution to all of our problems. You stop driving me crazy and just let us be together. Simple.”
“Hunter…” I sigh heavily. “Look, I love you. I do. And you’re right, I don’t want to see you with anybody else, but it’s selfish and I don’t know how to even ask that of you because I can’t do it. I want to, and I think about it, and I try to get there, but I can’t get past knowing that you willfully betrayed me. I just can’t.”
“Jesus Christ.” He pushes me off him and sits up, running his fingers through his hair. “I wanted to hurt you that day.”
“Well, you did. Good job,” I tell him. “These are the consequences.”
“You have to know I would never do anything like that to you again,” he says seriously.
“No, I don’t believe you would.”
He cocks an eyebrow expectantly. “And you want to be with me.”
“Yes, I do.”
“And you’re still gonna say no?”
I nod. “Yes, I am.”
“You are the most stubborn fucking person I have ever met.”
“I’m not going to sell myself out because you had a temper tantrum,” I tell him, unable to muster much apology for that stance.
Hunter growls, digging his fingers through his hair. “You’re going to drive me fucking crazy.”
I shrug. “All you had to do was not fuck one single girl. Out of all the girls in the whole world, I only asked that you leave one alone. And you did what you did instead. You pissed me off, you hurt me, and I’m never getting over it.”
“You’re making me understand kidnappers,” he tells me.
I shrug. “If you think you can find a way to kidnap me without me telling you no, you’re welcome to try.”
He slides me a speaking look. “Maybe I’ll ask Sherlock for some tips.”
I sit up and cross my arms over my chest. “That’s not very nice.”
“Chloroform—that’s what they use in movies, right?” he mutters.
“I think so. But then I’d just come out of it and tell you to let me go. You’d have to listen, so it would be a waste of time.”
“Why can’t you be easier?”
“I could’ve.” I flash him a smile. “You fucked up the easy road for us. If you still want me, you’ll have to be more creative.”
“I’ve never had to work so hard for anything in my life,” he mutters.
I roll my eyes, turning in the bed so I can pull back the bedspread and slip under it. “That’s the most spoiled rich boy thing you’ve ever said.”
“What are you doing?”
“Going to sleep. It’s late and I have to work tomorrow. Some of us aren’t spoiled rich boys,” I tease.
Hunter shoves back the blankets and settles in behind me. Wrapping his arms around me and pulling me back into his warmth, he says, “I’m glad you’re not a spoiled rich boy. I would have conflicted feelings about that.”
I grin, settling in and wiggling my butt against him until I’m comfortable. “Would you still like me?”
“Probably,” he mutters. “Pain in my ass.”
I giggle. “Actually, you’d be the pain in mine. I’m fairly certain I’d be a bottom.”
“This is a ridiculous conversation.”
“I’m tired,” I tell him. “It’s been a long day. I’ll be a better conversationalist tomorrow, but I’m about tapped for tonight.”
His arms tighten around me. I sigh contentedly and close my eyes.
“I have a question,” he asks a second later.
“What’s that?”
“I have a pass for tonight, right? I’m allowed to fuck you tonight, even if I don’t get to call you mine in the morning?”
I open my eyes as his big hand slides across my breast and he cups it. “I’m not sure that pass was good for the whole night. I think it was more of a onetime thing.”
He kisses the back of my neck and sends shivers down my spine. “Are you sure?”
A pulse starts up between my legs. “I’m not sure…”
He kisses his way down to where my neck meets my shoulders. “It happened pretty fast. There was no time to read the fine print.”
My heart skips a beat as he runs his tongue across my skin. “Pesky… terms and conditions,” I say weakly, my body begging me to let him keep his pass.
Just for tonight.
What could it hurt?
I moan as he palms my breast, then teases my nipple with his thumb. I’m still wearing all of my clothes except my panties, but the way he drags the fabric against my sensitive nipple makes me want to take them off.
I’m tempted to keep up the joke, but for once, I can’t seem to find my words.
When Hunter slides his hand up under my shirt to caress my bare flesh, I don’t say yes…
But I don’t say no.
Chapter Forty One
Riley
The next time my eyes open, it’s morning.
I’m naked, tangled up in bed sheets and Hunter’s arms. They’re still wrapped securely around me. We slept like this all night.
The thought makes me smile sleepily and curl back up.
I don’t know what time it is, but I don’t want to wake up yet. I want to stay in bed with him forever. I want our day pass to last forever.
My movement must jostle him awake. His arms suddenly tighten around me, as reluctant to let me go as I am to leave. He’s naked, too, his incredible body pressed against mine. I feel his cock jump against me as he stirs awake and finds me naked in his arms.
“Mm, good morning, beautiful,” he says, his voice all rough and sleepy as he presses a kiss to the crook of my neck.
God, he’s sexy.
“Good morning,” I offer back sweetly.
“How is the best non-girlfriend in the world today?”
I chuckle, absently caressing his hand on my waist. “Pleasantly satisfied. How about you?”
“Hungry,” he murmurs roughly, exposing his teeth and dragging them lightly across my flesh.
I shiver. “Sounds like someone needs breakfast.”
“Not exactly what I had in mind.”
I sigh, rolling over onto my back so I can look up at him. “I need to go home.”
“Right now?”
“I don’t know. What time is it?”
He reluctantly unlocks his arms from around me and rolls over to grab my phone off his nightstand. He checks it, but doesn’t hand it to me. “Just after ten.”
“I work at two,” I tell him. “I’ll need to shower.”
He puts my phone back down and cuddles up with me again. “I have a shower. Seven of them, in fact. Use whichever one you want.”
I crack a smile. “So bougie.”
“You know it.”
My smile fades. “I have to talk to my mom. She’s probably not going to be very happy about this impromptu sleepover.”
“No,” he agrees. “Especially once she finds out it was with me. If she finds out.”
“I’m going to tell her. I can’t keep this from her. I feel like I’m lying to her, and I’m sick of it. Besides, I need to get on some kind of birth control. You’re terrible at using condoms.”
His arms tighten around me and he smiles. “D
oes that mean you expect this to happen again?”
“It does not mean that,” I state, cocking an eyebrow. “But, just in case, I like to be prepared. If I leave the birth control up to you, I’ll be graduating high school with a baby in my belly.”
“That’s true,” he says unapologetically, kissing me. “I love coming inside you.”
I sigh. “I hope you were more responsible with other girls before me.”
“Of course I was,” he says, rather dismissively for someone who seems to be so adamantly anti-condom. “Like I’d want to knock up anyone else.”
“Aw.” I look over at him. “That’s strangely romantic. I hope you still feel that way in nine months when my ankles are swollen, I’m the size of a house, and I want to kill you.”
“I will,” he assures me.
“You say that with the easy confidence of a man who doesn’t know what he’s getting into,” I tell him, smiling sweetly.
“No, I say that with the confidence of a man chasing a woman who refuses to commit to him, who is aware that a baby might change her tune.”
My jaw drops. “Hunter Maxwell, that is despicable. If you ruin my life just to make me commit to you, I won’t do it anyway just to teach you a lesson.”
He rolls his eyes. “I don’t believe you. You’re not that spiteful.”
I cock an eyebrow. “Wanna bet? You’re living with the consequences of not believing one of my warnings right now. Do you really want to double down and do it again?”
“This would be completely different. I wouldn’t be doing anything to hurt you.”
“Just trap me,” I toss back.
“Hey, you told me I needed to come up with a clever way to kidnap you.”
“This is not a clever way,” I inform him. “In fact, it’s downright unoriginal and lazy. And it wouldn’t work. I still wouldn’t be with you, then I’d just not be with you and we’d have a baby together.”
“I wonder if our baby will be as difficult as you.”
I smack him in the stomach. “Stop talking about babies. I already have to stress out about the possibility of being pregnant until I have my period again. You’re not earning any brownie points here, mister.”
Hunter watches as I climb out of bed. “I don’t want you to stress about it. You stressed about it last time and then you weren’t even pregnant. Don’t do that to yourself again. There’s no point. If you miss a period, then we can think about it, but you don’t have to before that.”