"Hey, Gray," Tristan said from across the room. Houses in Palumbra were small; most contained just one room and a loft. Ginger and Emery hadn't wanted to return to the house where their mom had been killed, so the new government had found them a house not far from where Gray lived. Since Ginger was 17, everyone had agreed that Emery would be best left to her sister's care. Ginger had moved several things from their old house, creating a homey atmosphere for her and Emery.
One side of the room held a couch and chair grouped near the fireplace, which was the only heat source for the house. The other side of the room housed the same kitchen appliances found in every home in Palumbra. An electric stove, refrigerator and sink stood in a straight line along the wall. A short countertop stretched between the stove and the sink.
A ladder leading up to the loft where Ginger and Emery slept on straw-filled mattresses stood next to the refrigerator. It was small, but it was home.
Maeve plopped down in one of the chairs thinking that she spent almost as much time here as she did at home with Emma, despite the fact that her home was larger. When the new government, which had taken on the name of The People's Government, had made a sweep of the caves where Emma hid, she had decided to give life in Palumbra a try. Since Maeve and Gray were the only people she knew, it made sense for her to live with Maeve. Housing was limited, but the new government had wanted to reward Emma's courage, and she and Maeve now lived in one of the larger houses in Palumbra, which meant they each had their own room.
"How's Emma?" Emery asked. Emma had quickly become one of Emery's favorite people, a stand-in for the mom and grandma she no longer had. "Why didn't she come tonight?"
"She decided she was tired and wanted to stay in," Maeve said. "She said to tell you to stop by tomorrow."
"I will," Emery said eagerly.
"What do you guys do when you go over there?" Ginger asked.
"I teach Emma all about computers, and she tells me stories about how she survived in the caves."
"I guess everyone learns something," Tristan said.
"We're ready to eat," Ginger announced.
They sat down to a typical Palumbran meal of vegetables and bread. Meat was still in rare supply as few people had weapons to hunt with. The New Government tried to make sure everyone got an allotment once a month, but it never lasted long. After bowing their heads to say a quick prayer, everyone dug in.
When they finished eating, discussion turned to the meeting with Cleo. "Do you think we could get Cleo to let us go with the rescue patrol?" Maeve asked.
"I doubt it," Tristan said. He knew Cleo the best, having served in The Resistance with her. Maeve had never heard the whole story of how Tristan had joined The Resistance, but she suspected Cleo had something to do with it. "She's determined to keep the five of us safe."
"So she made you and Gray soldiers? That's a safe job." Ginger rolled her eyes.
"We never get sent out on any patrol that might be remotely dangerous." Tristan's voice held a hint of resentment. "Mostly we patrol the perimeter of Palumbra."
"I want to be part of that rescue patrol," Maeve said. "I don't want to sit around waiting for them to get back to find out if we're all going to die from some plague. I need to do something more important than setting broken bones and talking to children. I bet we have more experience outside the perimeter of Palumbra than anyone else. Don't you guys want to get out there and do something?"
"I'm with Maeve," Emery piped up. "We should figure out how to go."
"Even if they go, you're staying here," Ginger said firmly. "One revolution before you're a teenager is enough excitement."
Emery pouted but gave Maeve a conspiratorial wink.
"Why is this so important to you, Maeve?" Ginger asked. They had been friends since early school, but Maeve knew it was unlikely that Ginger would understand how she was feeling. Maeve barely understood her own feelings. She just knew she was restless. Her old life no longer seemed to fit, and she itched to understand what had happened to The Hub.
"This might be our only chance to look for The Hub. Don't you wonder why we can't find it? And what about Arabella? She could still be out there, too."
Gray took Maeve's hand. "She could be," he said soothingly. "But don't you think Cleo and the rest of the government are looking for her? Most likely, she died in The Beyond."
"So what could be the harm in sending us on the patrol?" Maeve came back to her first point.
Tristan sighed. "I'll ask her, Maeve, but I'm sure the answer is going to be no."
Gray stood. "I need to get you home. Aren't you teaching tomorrow?"
The new government had asked them to be part of an initiative to help the children of Palumbra understand their new freedoms, and they each took turns teaching an after-school class of 10-year-olds.
Maeve nodded. "Tomorrow's lesson is 'Making Good Choices,' you know like choosing to be a part of the government's rescue patrol." She smiled. "I don't know if you can really teach 10-year-olds how to make good decisions, though."
"Hey, I made good decisions at 10," Emery cried indignantly.
"Really?" Ginger asked. "So, writing equations on the wall was a good decision?"
"Of course it was," Emery said as she rolled her eyes. "Where else was I going to write it? It was way too long to write down on paper. I wouldn't have been able to see the whole thing at once."
Everyone laughed as they said their goodbyes.
###
"Thomas, what do you think a good decision would be in this situation?" Maeve asked a small boy in the back of the classroom.
Thomas thought for a moment, then said, "I wouldn't do either one. I'd take all the sandwiches and save them for a day when we had no food."
Maeve looked at the boy with black hair that just touched the collar of his shirt in the back. She shook her head. "But that's not one of the options. How would you keep the sandwiches fresh?"
"If they're protein paste sandwiches, they'll keep forever. That stuff never goes bad." Thomas made a face that had the other kids in the class laughing.
"But why do you think you need to save the sandwiches?" Maeve asked. "We have enough to eat now."
"But we haven't always, and you never know when the new government will decide to take away our food again." Several other children nodded in agreement with Thomas.
Thomas was an orphan whose parents had died when the WG rounded up Resistance fighters. Maeve also remembered when the WG had used food as a way to keep people under its thumb. If you followed the rules there had been just enough to survive, but if you defied the government, food often disappeared from your table.
Maeve glanced at Ginger and saw her shaking her head. Maeve decided to move on.
"Thomas, I don't want you to worry about the government taking your food," Maeve said gently. "The new government is different, but I understand your decision to keep the sandwiches for a different day. Does anyone else want to tell me what they would do with the sandwiches?"
###
"Thomas?"
"Yes, Miss Maeve."
"Just call me Maeve, Thomas. Can we talk for a minute?"
"Sure. I just have to be home by 5."
Maeve waved him toward a kid-sized table and chairs. "Thomas, you do know that things are different with the new government in charge, right?"
Thomas looked down and scuffed the ground with his foot. "I know we want to think they are, but what if that government goes bad, too? What do we do then?"
Maeve laid her hand on top of Thomas's smaller one. "Thomas, you're 10 years old. My friends and I fought so that you don't have to worry about having sandwiches tomorrow or the day after that or the day after that. We want you to embrace the choices you have for the future and not worry about whether there will be enough food or if your uncle is going to disappear."
Thomas looked hard at Maeve. "But you guys didn't have a lot of choices when you did that."
"Sure we did. We could have quit. We could have turned ourselve
s in."
"But the WG would have killed you!" Thomas exclaimed.
"Maybe," Maeve agreed. "But it was still a choice. That's the thing about choices, Thomas. Even when you're faced with two bad options, you still get to choose. I made some choices during that time that were tough, that weren't things I would normally do, but I made them so that my friends and I could survive. I made them so that you don't have to make them. My friends and I fought so that you don't have to worry about the government. There are good people in charge now, Thomas. They want people like you to be free to make choices about what you want to do when you grow up and even where you want to go."
"Go? Where is there to go?"
"Right now, we don't know, but there's a whole lot of land out there. Maybe someday we'll get to explore it." Maeve reached out and ruffled his hair. "Maybe one day we'll even get to explore the stars."
Thomas's eyes rounded and his mouth formed an O. "The stars, really?"
"Who knows?" Maeve lifted one shoulder in a shrug. "My friend Ginger thinks it's possible, and she's really smart. Way smarter than me."
"Wow," Thomas marveled. "I've never even thought about leaving Palumbra."
"It's one of those things that might be a choice in the future," Maeve said as she stood up. "That's why we want you guys to think about making choices and being smart about it now, when you're young. If you learn the value of freedom now, you'll be less likely to let anyone take it away from you."
Thomas stood up and gave Maeve a high-five. "Thanks, Miss Maeve. I can't wait to tell my friends we might one day go to the stars!"
Maeve turned to find Gray standing in the doorway as she watched Thomas rush out.
Gray smiled at her and said, "Still think you're not making a difference?"
CHAPTER FOUR
"No, absolutely not!" Cleo said to Tristan. "No way am I sending teenagers on this expedition. It's far too dangerous."
"Cleo," Tristan said calmly. "Why did you ask us to the meeting if you didn't want our help?"
Cleo threw up her hands in exasperation. "You guys know more about what's beyond The River than anyone else. I wanted your expertise, not to put you in danger again."
"That expertise makes us the best people to send," Tristan argued. "We have experience beyond The River, and we're the ones who discovered The Hub even existed. Maeve knows the most about the caves since she and Emma live together."
"No," Cleo repeated. "We're not putting you guys in harm's way again. You've done enough. Don't you all just want to have a normal life? Why do you even want to go out there?"
Maeve, Gray and Ginger watched the conversation intently from their spot along the back wall of the room. They had decided to let Tristan handle Cleo since he had known her the longest.
"We do want a normal life," Tristan said. "But how do we settle into 'normal' when we have no idea what's out there?"
Cleo paced back and forth. "You just let us handle it! We have soldiers and scientists who can deal with this. You don't need to."
Maeve stepped forward. "I think we do," she said quietly.
Cleo stopped her pacing and looked directly at Maeve. "Why?"
Maeve held Cleo's gaze without blinking. "I have nightmares. Every night."
"So you want to give yourself more?"
"No. I want to do something to chase them away. I want to find out what's out there so I can stop worrying about it. I want to protect what we've built here. I want the sacrifices we've made to mean something." Maeve stood completely still as she spoke, but her eyes burned with ferocity.
"She's right," Gray said, stepping forward and taking Maeve's hand. "This is something we need to do. We don't want to lead the team. We just want to be a part of it. Tristan and I are both soldiers, Ginger works for you and Maeve has proved she can handle herself. Let us go and see what's out there, so we can sleep at night."
Ginger walked over and stood next to Tristan. "What can it hurt? It's a quick trip into the desert. We'll be back in less than a week, and we might learn something that will make us all feel safe."
Cleo looked from one earnest face to the next then shook her head. "I'm sorry," she said with a touch of sadness to her voice. She looked at Maeve. "I know you think this will chase the nightmares away, but I can't send you out there. There's too much unknown, and you, all of you..." Her gaze swept over the others. "You've done enough."
"But," Maeve started.
Cleo straightened and all compassion fell from her eyes. Here was the strong leader that was moving Palumbra forward. "My final answer is no."
###
"She didn't listen to us, not really," Maeve complained to Emma as they cleaned up the dishes after dinner.
Emma slowly rose from her seat at the table to take her place drying the dishes that Maeve washed. Maeve noted that although Emma had plenty to eat and decent shelter now, her gait had noticeably slowed in the past few months. Living together had given Maeve a new appreciation for how hard Emma's life had been as Emma shared bits and pieces of her past. The two had grown close in the months they lived together, and Emma had become the grandmother that Maeve had never had. She hated to think that Emma might not be around that much longer.
Emma reached around Maeve to pick up the towel and patted her on the shoulder. "I know, dear, but Cleo has to think about bigger things than just the five of you. She has the weight of leadership on her shoulders." Emma picked up one of their two metal plates and began to dry it. "Imagine the outcry if she sent the heroes of The Resistance into the desert and they didn't come back."
Maeve stuck her hand in the soapy water, splashing it out of the basin. "But who knows more about what's out there than us?"
"Why do you want to go so badly?" Emma asked as she wiped a tin cup.
Maeve shrugged. "I need to know what's out there." She wiped her forehead with the back of her hand. "The WG believed that The Hub was dangerous enough that they were going to destroy it. The new government has looked for signs of the city and found none. Now we find people who claim to be from The Hub. If there are other people out there, shouldn't we work together?"
"And you don't think Cleo has the same goals?"
Maeve chewed on her lip. "I think she does, but what if The Hub does have dangerous secrets? Then what does she do?"
"Is that really the reason you want to go?" Emma asked gently.
Maeve shook her head. "I need to get away." Maeve's shoulders slumped. "I need to feel like I'm doing something." She turned defeated eyes to Emma. "There are things I just want to forget."
Emma put down the fork she was drying and embraced Maeve. "Running away isn't going to help you forget. I'm sorry to say you'll never forget what happened." Emma pulled back and pinned Maeve with a serious look. "And I don't think you really want to forget. Forgetting would mean everything that happened was meaningless, that who you've become isn't who you want to be. Do you really want things to go back to the way they were before?"
Maeve tossed the rag she was using into the basin with a plop, sank into her chair and dropped her head to her hands. "I just don't know what to do," she whispered.
Emma gently set her towel next to the basin and pulled her chair to face Maeve's. She pried Maeve's hands off her face and held Maeve's young, unblemished hands in her wrinkled and twisted ones. "You have to recognize that sometimes it's not the big things we do that change the world. More often, it's the little ones -- caring about someone, teaching others, living with compassion. Those are the things that make a difference, the things that change a generation."
"So you're saying I should just stay here and let others worry about the big stuff?"
"That's not what I'm saying at all," Emma said with a sigh. "Just don't forget the little stuff while you're chasing the big stuff."
###
"What are we going to do?" Maeve kicked listlessly at the ground the next day as she walked to the hospital with Gray.
"Tristan and I were talking last night," Gray replied. He looked at Ma
eve, drew his eyebrows together and frowned as he took in the circles under her eyes and the defeated slope of her shoulders. "We think we should just go anyway."
Maeve stopped and looked up. Her eyes sparked with interest. "Do you think we could?"
Gray cocked his head and gave her an incredulous look. "Are we not the people who braved the world outside of Palumbra and defeated the WG mostly on our own just a few months ago?"
"But we had no choice. We just did it. This would be much harder and a deliberate choice."
Gray took her hand and resumed walking. "You forget that you made a choice."
Maeve shook her head. "When? I feel like we were just swept along in events. I didn't decide much of anything."
Gray stopped again and turned her to look at him. He swept a lock of her hair off her forehead and tucked it behind her ear. "Of course you did. Remember, in the tunnels with my uncle when he offered you a life of safety versus participating in The Resistance?"
Maeve looked at the ground and shrugged. "That wasn't much of a choice to make. I didn't want to live a life cut off from everyone else."
Gray tipped her chin back up so he could look in her eyes. "It was still a choice, one that changed our world."
"But think about how much we lost," Maeve said. "Silas, your uncle, Emery and Ginger's mom." She dropped her gaze again. "We're all forever changed. Was it worth it?"
"Do you think it was?" Gray asked.
Maeve chewed the skin on the side of her thumbnail, trying to come up with a truthful answer. Did she think it was worth it? She didn't even recognize the person she had been six months ago, living with her parents and blindly following the dictates of the WG. Did she really want to go back to that?
Finally, Maeve nodded. "I think it was. I just wish it hadn't cost so much."
Gray hugged her close and laid his cheek on the top of her head. "I know. I miss my uncle every day, but this is what he was fighting for. And I think he would want us to be involved in whatever mystery The Hub holds."
"I don't know, Gray. If we're not part of the official search party, how would we get out of Palumbra without being noticed? I'm sure Cleo will try to stop us since she's so determined to keep us safe."
The Lost City: The Palumbra Chronicles: Book Two Page 2