It was now or never. I had to dig deep, find that courage. She was worth it.
“Gemma, I’m a goddamn fool,” I said. “I fucked up. I’m so sorry.”
“You did fuck up,” she agreed. “How could you violate my privacy like you did?”
I hung my head. I deserved that.
“I don’t know what I was thinking,” I answered eventually. “I was looking for something else, to begin with. And then when I saw your messages, it was like something just came over me. I wanted to know everything about you. That’s why I made the list.” She went to talk, but I cut her off. “No, let me finish,” I said. “I know it was wrong. I don’t have any defence. I was a damn coward, thinking it was my only way back to you. That I could impress you, somehow, with a knowledge of what you wanted.” I turned to her, taking a deep breath. “I love you, Gemma Fox. I’ve loved you forever.”
She gasped. “You love me?”
I nodded slowly. “I love you so much it hurts. I should have told you before now. I was a fool.”
She was looking up at me with eyes swimming with tears.
“Lance,” she whispered. “I love you, too.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “You love me? You aren’t in love with Jack anymore?”
She shook her head. “I’m sorry I led you to believe that. The truth is, I got over Jack a long time ago. Yes, it hurt like hell when I heard that he died. We had shared a lot of our lives, and I still cared for him.” She stopped, looking at me. “But I hadn’t been in love with him for a long, long time.”
I walked up to her as if in a dream, taking her in my arms. She didn’t resist. I kissed her, long and slow and sweet. It was the sweetest kiss of my life. She looked up at me, those huge green eyes raking over my face.
“I’m still as mad as hell at you,” she said. “You are going to have to make it up to me.”
“Anything,” I vowed. “I’ll do anything to make it up to you. Just tell me that we have a future together. I want you to be my wife, Gemma Fox. I want you by my side forever.”
Her eyes widened. “Was that a proposal?”
“Well, yes,” I said. I got down on one knee, taking her hand. “Will you marry me, Gemma?” I didn’t have a ring. It wasn’t how I had planned it.
But it was perfect. Gemma, as I had always known her, in her parents’ yard. Those golden curls whipping around her face.
“Yes,” she whispered. “Yes, yes, yes.”
I let out a whoop, grabbing her and twirling her around.
She laughed, tossing her head back so the curls fell down her back.
“So,” she said. Her eyes were shining. “This list. What else is on it?”
I grinned. “A whole lot more. I reckon we could keep adding to it for the rest of our lives.” It was true.
I wanted nothing more, but to keep discovering her, peeling back the layers of this amazing woman.
***
THE END
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Prince Daddy’s Nanny
Antonio
“This is completely unacceptable Tara. I am a goddamn Prince and I will not share custody of my son. With anyone!”
It still rankled that my dead wife Miriam would do this to me. She’d passed away fifteen months ago after a long exhaustive bout with cancer, but little did I know that she’d left a much more legacy.
Tara was a highly-respected attorney who specialized in family issues, from divorce to custody and all the little issues in between. My cousin, Rafael Cavallero recommended her skills because she’d been helpful battling his in-laws for custody of his little girl.
To be honest, Rafael’s offer to send me to the best shocked me, considering I slept with his first wife, and then I tried to fuck his nanny, to whom he was now engaged. I’m a bastard and I freely admit it, but Rafa has forgiven me by making sure I don’t lose my son.
Steely green eyes bored into me like she saw too much. “I have to say that this video is pretty damning but what I need to know Antonio, is there any truth to it?”
“Why does that matter? Andreas is my son and that woman is just the help!” Sasha was much more than a nanny, I knew that. She’d been there for Miriam and Andreas from the day they came home from the hospital.
“It matters,” she said with enough patience to drive me insane. I didn’t need her talking to me like I was crazy, “because your wife seemed to think that you were at best, an absent father.”
And that was the final punch to the gut. Unlike many in the royal set, I had married for love. As the second born son of the second born son, I had that luxury. Unless my cousin Rafael and then my father and twin brother died or abdicated, I would never be King. I had come to terms with that, because I had fallen in love with Miriam from the moment I heard her sweet husky laugh. Compared to my stiff, formal upbringing the beautiful blonde with the sun kissed skin had captivated me. She was part school teacher, part bohemian surfer and we’d loved each other madly. But she didn’t have faith in me to raise our son properly.
“I am his father, can she do this?”
Tara nodded as she sifted through a folder that had accompanied the video will as well as the paper will. “She makes a damn good case Antonio. Can you tell me what allergies your son has?”
“My son has no allergies!” How could this woman, hell how could Miriam think I didn’t know this about him?
“Strawberries and tree nuts.” Her gaze held no judgment, no pity yet it still pissed me off. “Has he had any major surgeries?”
“What does this matter Tara? I want my son and I want you to do whatever in the hell it takes to revoke Sasha’s custody rights! Got it?” Though I’d been living in America for two decades building my fashion empire, people still bowed down to my title. They bent and scraped for my approval and generally did as I demanded.
“You are not listening to me Antonio. As it stands now, no judge would give you outright custody with your own wife declaring you an absentee and borderline neglectful father. Sure, your money can sidestep the issue of neglect but you want custody to put him in the full-time care. But he already has a nanny, who is now also his legal guardian. She cares for him around the clock, attends parent teacher meetings, chaperones field trips and takes him on doctor’s appointments. What exactly do you do?”
“I provide for him.”
“Okay,” she said and folded her arms as she leaned back in the plush leather chair behind her desk. “Anything else? When was the last time you spent time with him?”
I was hard pressed to think of a time recently other than, “The funeral.”
She nodded and I braced myself for Tara to lay into me the same way Rafael had. “Your best bet is to have the nanny, Sasha, relinquish her claim to the child. I could bill you for hours and hours of my time if it will make you feel better, but with that video your wife left, you still won’t win.”
“She will never relinquish her claim.” Sasha was a damn stubborn woman who seemed to love nothing more than being contrary. I could admit that she loved my son deeply and cared for him like he was her own. But he wasn’t hers dammit, he was mine.
“Excuse me for saying this, but that sounds like a good thing. I can’t figure out why you would want to alienate the woman who’s been there for Andreas when you can’t be.”
“Do you have any idea how it feels for me to have to ask permission to do anything? If I want to take him to Italy to visit my family, then I will need Sasha’s approval.”
Tara rolled her eyes. “According to your wife, you would never, and have never, taken him anywhere just the two of you. Is that correct?”
I thought about it for a moment and I hated the conclusion I came to. “Yes, that’s correct.” But how could it be? Have I really never taken Andr
eas to a ball game or the park just the two of us?
“Then I suggest you put those good looks to use this time. Work your magic on this nanny and seduce her into giving up her claim, because that is your best bet.”
“That’s your best legal advice? Seduce her?”
She nodded and arched a blonde brow at him. “Either that or a nasty and lengthy legal battle that might cost you your son, or cost him the most important person in his world.”
“When you put it like that, I guess I have no choice.” Not that I had any objections to seducing Sasha. She was beautiful with a giant mane of curls, mossy green eyes that looked almost clear on most days. She was a tiny woman but her curves matched her sassy attitude. Yes, I would enjoy seducing Sasha. It shouldn’t be too hard since most women threw themselves at me, eager to warm my bed and spend my fortune. If I put on the charm, she would be no different. “I’ll let you know how it goes.”
She smiled. “When you’re ready, bring her in to sign the papers and I’ll process them immediately.”
With a wave, I left her office and took a deep breath as I walked into the midafternoon sun. A plan had already begun to form in my head.
Sasha
“That’s not a cake, it looks like a hamburger!” Little Andreas Cavallero, also known as the cutest kid in the whole world, looked in disbelief at my newest pastry creation.
“I promise you it’s a cake and I should know since I spent all day working on it.” I’d already taken photos and showed it to my professor who had been suitably impressed and given me an A. I knew Andreas would love it, because the little boy had an affinity for American food. The greasier the better. “What are you drawing?” Every night he sat at the counter and drew or sketched pictures, while I worked on my assignments for pastry school. Soon I would have my diploma. Very soon.
“I’m drawing you and me on the beach.” He looked up with big blue eyes so much like Miriam’s my heart squeezed. They took over his small face giving him a vulnerable look that belied the strength in his little body.
“Is that a hint?” He loved the beach and since Miriam lost her battle with cancer we’d moved into a beach house in Malibu that gave him nonstop access to the ocean. Unlike the dirty, overpopulated beaches of my own youth, we had silky sand, and no broken glass or pollution. And no people, unless you counted the occasional neighbor on the odd weekend.
“Can I have some burger cake first please?”
How could I say no to such a beautiful face? “You sure can. Tell me if it tastes as good as it looks.”
Moving his drawing aside, Andreas brushed his floppy chestnut curls from his face and waited eagerly, licking his lips.
“I can’t wait!”
It was nice to have someone around who appreciated my skills. Miriam had the world’s biggest sweet tooth, during the last year of her life she could hardly eat anything but my fudgy brownies that I made extra moist just for her. Now it was just me and Andreas left to gobble up my treats, because his father, Prince Antonio, was entirely too selfish to put his son’s needs ahead of his desire to party with the beautiful people of the world. Thinking of Antonio always left me frustrated and a little flustered, so I shook off thoughts of him and poured two glasses of almond milk for our cake.
“Okay Andy, be kind.”
He grinned, showing off his recently lost front tooth at my use of his nickname. “I will.” Then he dug into the cake like it was a gift on Christmas morning. He had to open his mouth as wide as it would go to fit the first bite, smearing chocolate and fondant all over his face. “So good Sasha. I love it!”
“Good. Don’t forget the milk kiddo.” We ate in silence until the slices of cake were long gone. I knew it wouldn’t be long before he was ready to walk the beach in search of ocean debris. Andreas loved to collect shells, rocks, sometimes algae and anything else cool or gross that could steal a little boy’s attention.
Normally we were out by the water no more than an hour before he started to yawn mid-sentence, but tonight there were so many new discoveries and he had so much to share that by the time we made it back to the house, it was time for bed. “What should we do for summer break?”
He was so excited about his first real summer vacation and I was determined to make it memorable. In exactly four weeks he would finish the first grade which worked out perfectly, because in two weeks I would be an official graduate of pastry school. Still working as a nanny though. Not that I minded, because I loved my job and I loved Andreas, but it was a strange position to be in, both guardian and employee.
Never mind all the tension in the house between me and Antonio, who hated the thought of sharing custody with me more than he hated anything. Not that his glowering and dark looks bothered me. He was wealthy and powerful, but I couldn’t bring myself to give a damn about a man who ignored his child. No matter how good looking he was.
Bedtime went as easily as it always did because Andreas was such a good kid. “I’m ready to come out!” He held his arms up so I could wrap the towel around him and lift him from the tub.
“You’re getting heavy, I think you might have to start carrying me soon.” The sound of his giggles always warmed my heart as he squiggled into his pajamas.
“You’re too big!”
“Careful or you might hurt my feelings,” I joked. “Did you brush your teeth?”
He nodded. “I wouldn’t hurt you. I love you Sasha.”
Wiping toothpaste from his mouth, I put him in bed. “I love you too, kiddo.”
He was all tucked in to his bed, decorated with comic strips on his comforter, sheets and pillowcase. “Do you miss Mama?”
“Of course I do, your mom was amazing and she was a great friend to me. Do you miss her?”
“Uh-huh, a lot.”
Miriam had been wonderful. She was beautiful and friendly and kind. “She taught me how to surf and she only laughed a little each time I fell.”
“But you’re so good now. Can you teach me?”
I nodded because of course I would give him this connection to Miriam. “I sure can. As soon as school is done we’ll get up early in the morning for lessons, okay?”
“Yesss!” He punched the air and nearly fell off the bed with his enthusiasm. His smile dimmed. “Sasha, does Father love me?”
“Of course he does,” I told him because I honestly believed it. But I also thought Antonio saw kids as an accessory to be seen and not heard. “You’re an awesome kid, how could anyone not love you?”
“How come he doesn’t play with me?”
Because he’s a pompous jerk who cares more about his empire than his kid. That’s what I would have liked to say, but I loved Andreas too much to disillusion him at such a young age.
“He’s very busy with his work but maybe you can ask him to do something the next time you see him.” Who knew when that would be?
“Okay,” he said, disappointment in his voice because he already knew what would come of any request he made to Antonio. He set Harry Potter on my lap and thirty minutes later he was asleep and wrapped around my legs.
“Goodnight kiddo,” I extricated myself and kissed his forehead, loving the sweet smell of his kid-friendly body soap.
“’Night Sasha.”
With a smile, I quietly crept from the room. Then promptly screamed as a hand wrapped around my arm. My eyes adjusted to the darkness.
“What the hell are you doing lurking in the dark and grabbing people?”
“It’s my house, or have you forgotten?” Even in the dark I could hear the condescension in his voice and I wanted to smack his handsome face.
“Right. How could I possibly forget.”
Sidestepping him, I went downstairs to finish cleaning the kitchen even though I knew the housekeeper would handle it in the morning. Why Miriam? Why did you make me responsible for your son? I was trapped, unable to leave because of how deeply I loved Andreas. I’d been with him since he was days old and Miriam had a bad case of post-partum. It had taken mo
re than a year for her to come out of it and by then she realized she would need all the help she could get.
“Did you mean it? That stuff you said to Andreas?”
I sighed at his interrogation. “Does it matter?”
“I wouldn’t ask if it didn’t.”
My gaze lifted and locked on his. “No I didn’t mean it because I have no idea how you feel or why you don’t spend time with your kid.”
“I do have a company to run.” He was annoyed. Good, because so was I.
“Yes, I’m aware Antonio. We are all aware of your priorities.” Numbers one through ten were his business.
“That’s why we hired you, Sasha.”
I wanted to laugh. “No Miriam hired me because she had post-partum depression and couldn’t cope with Andreas and she knew you wouldn’t either. What I think about your relationship is irrelevant, especially to you.”
“Maybe,” he shrugged. “Maybe not. But you could teach me to be a better father.” His voice was pitched low, so it held a seductive quality I was sure worked well to turn women’s wills into honey. He moved closer and I backed away.
“If you want to be a father all you have to do is be there for your son. Spend some time with him.”
“But I want you to teach me.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Of course I do, you always have that sexy teacher thing going on.” He stood close enough I could feel his breath on me. “Maybe you’ll even put on your glasses for me.”
I rolled my eyes. “You’re playing some kind of game and I don’t like it. Find another way to amuse yourself, I have an early morning.” I pushed past him and climbed the stairs to my room.
***
“Are you sure you don’t want to apply to any of these jobs Sasha? You have a real talent for creating elaborate cakes.”
My favorite professor, Chef Bolero had been pushing me to apply to pastry kitchens all over the country.
“It’s not that I don’t want to Chef, but I have responsibilities right now that won’t let me stray too far from home.” I didn’t think of Andreas as a responsibility. He was the son of my heart, and as long as Antonio was determined to pretend he had no son, he would have me there to cheer him on, to guide him and love him. “I promise to keep my skills sharp and call you the moment I’m ready to work in a kitchen.”
Cowboy's Barmaid: A Small Town Military Romance (Lucky Flats Ranchers Book 2) Page 17