Banished Love

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Banished Love Page 25

by Ramona Flightner


  “How long has it been since you have seen him?” I asked.

  “Three years,” Gabriel said. “Richard, we should take our leave now. It’s past time.”

  Richard studied him for a few moments and then shrugged his shoulders, reluctantly agreeing. He turned toward me. “Miss Sullivan, it’s always a pleasure to see you. I hope to see you again in the near future.” He walked away to rejoin Colin, Patrick and Lucas for a few moments, shaking hands and taking his leave.

  Gabriel turned to me, with bleak eyes. “Miss Clarissa.” He bowed formally and turned to leave.

  Shock cascaded through me at his abrupt departure. I could not believe he would leave in such a way. He had not even kissed my hand! Frustration and the old doubts rose up in me, although I quickly tried to dampen them down. I hoped he would glance back toward me as I watched his retreating disappearance through the door, but to no avail. I stood at the side of the room, flummoxed.

  CHAPTER 31

  SAVANNAH’S WEDDING DAY DAWNED cloudy and gray. I peered out my window hoping to see a patch of blue, but it was a dismal, dark June morning. As I dressed and primped for the wedding, I fervently prayed the entire time that I would cause no mishaps during the ceremony or wedding breakfast. I donned my new pale green satin dress with tight-fitting bodice, flowing skirts and lace trim. I tilted a matching pale green hat at a jaunty angle and pulled on white elbow-length gloves.

  When I arrived at the Russells’ home, less than an hour before the wedding, Aunt Matilda was in a state. I rushed to Savannah’s room, surprised to find her still in her nightclothes, sitting on the edge of her bed, staring vacantly ahead as though in a stupor.

  “Sav,” I reproached, as I entered her room, closing the door behind me. “You must get dressed. Now.”

  Savannah reached out to me, gripping my hand. “I refused to begin preparations until you arrived and I could speak with you. Mother is furious, but I don’t care.” Savannah spoke in a wavering tone, as though on the verge of tears. “Rissa, I don’t know if I can do this!”

  “Getting dressed or actually marrying Jonas?” I asked.

  “Marrying Jonas,” Savannah responded, swatting me gently with her hand. “I feel like I’ve rushed headlong into something without thinking it through fully. What if this is a mistake?” Savannah peered at me with imploring eyes.

  “Sav, I think most brides feel this way on their wedding day.”

  “You didn’t!”

  “Savannah, this isn’t about me,” I said as I took another deep breath, crouching down to face her at eye level. “If you do not want to marry him, then don’t. Remember what I asked you last time? What do you want?” When there was no response, I asked again. “Savannah, what do you truly want?”

  Savannah stared at me. “You don’t like Jonas. Why are you encouraging me to marry him?” She cocked her head to one side.

  “I may not like him, but I do want my favorite cousin to be happy.” I smiled at her.

  “Do you think he’ll make me happy?” Savannah implored.

  “Sav, I can’t answer that. And anyway, why look to him for all of your happiness? Maybe you should start thinking about looking toward yourself…”

  “No, none of your liberal teachings today,” Savannah interrupted. She breathed in deeply a few times, steadying herself. “Help me up. I need to get ready for the ceremony.” She met my worried gaze with a determined look in her eyes. “I am sure, Rissa. It’s all planned, everyone likes him. I know my parents wouldn’t encourage me to marry a bad man. In times of doubt, I should look to them for guidance, and they’ve been nothing but supportive. I must banish this sense of misgiving.” She took a few more deep breaths and then held out her hand to me. “Help me get ready?”

  I smiled, nodding. In the end, we needed Polly’s help too, but I greatly enjoyed this last moment with Savannah before she married Jonas. I blinked away tears, knowing that our relationship would change irrevocably once she married him. I sighed, marveling at her in her wedding finery. The long-sleeved cream-colored silk damask with paisley pattern tapered at the waist before billowing out to wide skirts. Waxed orange blossom clusters adorned her left shoulder and waist. Silk and fabric bows decorated the hem, and the lace at her bodice highlighted her trim figure. The lace veil covered her beautiful blond hair done up in a graceful chignon, the veil reaching midback. Quite simply, the dress fit her to perfection.

  “How do I look?” Savannah asked.

  “Like a fairy princess,” I said, echoing what she had said to me on my near wedding day. We exchanged grins in the mirror.

  “Thank heavens you are finally ready, Savannah. It wouldn’t do to keep the guests waiting too long, not after last time,” Aunt Matilda stated as she entered the room, with a pointed look in my direction. I paled at the reference to my canceled nuptials but shook aside any hurt.

  “Oh, don’t you look a picture,” said Aunt Matilda. She paused with her hand over her heart to stare at Savannah.

  We hurried downstairs. Uncle Martin watched Savannah descend the stairs, a deep emotion glinting in his eyes. He gently enfolded her in a hug and offered her his arm, to enter the carriages that would take us to the church. They left in the first carriage while I joined Lucas, Colin and Aunt Matilda in the second. Patrick, Aunt Betsy, Da and Mrs. Smythe would meet us at the church.

  When we arrived at the church, Lucas and Colin helped Savannah down the steps of the coach. I fussed with her train, and then it was time to enter the church. The organist began to play, outdoing herself with beautiful music. As I sedately walked up the aisle toward the altar on Lucas’s elbow, I smiled serenely to the left and the right, not focusing on the invitees. I did beam at Da, Patrick and Aunt Betsy. Thankfully I did not see Grandpapa or Grandmama Thompson.

  During the ceremony, Savannah appeared serene and composed, the perfect match for Jonas’s calm, expressionless profile. He wore a flawless black suit with white tie and waistcoat, and he held himself stiffly as he stood by Savannah at the altar. I had not noticed even a flicker of joy in his expression as he watched her walk up the aisle. By the end of the service, I had begun to congratulate myself for surviving Savannah’s wedding mishap free.

  I stepped out behind Savannah and Jonas to follow them down the aisle, blithely reaching for Lucas’s arm. I missed the step down from the altar, and, the next thing I knew, I was in the air. I held on to Lucas’s arm with all my might, causing him to lose his balance and careen into me, bashing our heads together. I found myself in a twisted heap on the floor, tangled up with Lucas. Savannah glanced back at me with a horrified expression on her face. I saw her lips twitch as though she were trying not to laugh, while Jonas looked at the commotion I had caused and glared at me.

  After an appallingly long silence in the church as everyone watched Lucas and me attempt to right ourselves, Da rushed past Savannah and Jonas to heave me off the floor. Lucas rose quickly when he found himself no longer tangled in my skirts. I saw his chest shaking and hoped it was with mirth. I squared my shoulders, gripped Lucas’s arm again, ignored his grimace and marched down the aisle with him.

  After an interminable receiving line, where I received numerous tongue-in-cheek compliments on my innovative flight from the altar, I moved to a quiet corner. As I stood in my now wrinkled dress sipping sweet punch, I watched Savannah move around the room with Jonas.

  “They make a charming couple, don’t they?”

  I stiffened at Cameron’s voice in my ear. “Leave. Leave me alone.”

  “When have I ever done what was expected of me?” he asked in a joking tone. “I want to speak with you, and I know you will not make another scene after today’s spectacle.”

  I stiffened further as he caressed my elbow. I gave silent thanks for the long formal gloves I wore. “And when have I ever done what was expected of me?” I said in a challenging voice, moving to turn toward him.

  His grip on my elbow turned painful, and I stilled my movement. “Listen well, Clarissa. This is t
he life you should have. That we should have. And we will have it. Someday soon you will forget about that unfortunate attachment to the worthless laborer. You will realize we are to be together. But heed me on this, we will marry.”

  I shivered at his words and stiffened my shoulders to turn toward him. However, as suddenly as he had appeared, he was gone. My arm was freed, pain flooding my elbow. I massaged it and turned to look for him. I saw him skirting a crowd of high-society people before slipping out a side door.

  As I no longer wanted to be alone with my thoughts in a corner, I walked toward Aunt Betsy, forcing Cameron and his words from my mind.

  “I had thought there would be more than a few drinks and cake,” Aunt Betsy murmured with a forced smile toward an acquaintance across the room.

  “As you know, Aunt Betsy,” I whispered back, “there were too many guests for a formal meal.”

  “This is why I suggested a small wedding at home.”

  “Which would never have been grand enough for Jonas,” I said.

  “Betsy,” Grandmama Thompson interrupted, “good to see you here.” She turned to me. “Well, girl, there’s no need to demonstrate to decent society you have no wish to wed.”

  “I beg your pardon?” I asked.

  “Seeing as you either flee from the altar or cause your fiancé to flee from you. No man of consequence would want you now,” Grandmama said with a sniff of agreement from Grandpapa.

  “Maybe she desires more than a man perceived to be more than he is,” Aunt Betsy said with a chill to her tone.

  “Betsy, don’t start,” Grandmama warned.

  “I, for one, enjoyed the entertainment,” Aunt Betsy said with a smile.

  “I must hope the wedding reporter had departed by that point,” Grandmama said.

  “Not very likely, ol’ Grandmama,” Colin said with an insolent grin as he joined us with a glance around the subdued room. “Only thing of interest to happen all day.”

  “This is how good society acts, young man,” she hissed.

  “Then I must give thanks to be so rarely in its presence.” He gripped my hand, tugging me away from them. “Insufferable witch.”

  “Colin!”

  “Well, she is, even if she is our grandmother. Come, I think Uncle Martin is to give a speech.” We maneuvered our way to a good vantage point.

  “Col, Cameron was here,” I whispered.

  “I know. I saw you speaking with him, but before I could approach you, he vanished. Are you all right?”

  “I’m fine. Although I don’t know why he thinks I’d ever want to marry him.”

  “Don’t go anywhere alone, Rissa. I worry about him.”

  “I won’t go anywhere but Russells alone. I promise, Col.” Colin nodded, accepting my compromise.

  Colin turned his attention to the newlyweds. “Savannah seems out of sorts,” Colin said, watching her stiffly cut cake with Jonas.

  “I think she is trying to act properly.”

  “She’s stuck with him now,” Colin said with a shake of his head. “Though I think the grandparents are happier about it than she is.” He nodded his head in their direction.

  Grandpapa Thompson seemed especially delighted that Jonas was now a member of our family. He clapped Jonas on the back a few times, showing more pride in him than he ever had in any of his grandsons.

  Uncle Martin cleared his throat and asked for a moment’s attention. The quiet murmurs quickly abated. “If I could interrupt the festivities for a moment,” Uncle Martin stated. “I would like to congratulate Jonas on choosing my beautiful daughter, Savannah. May you both be happy in your marriage.”

  At the polite clapping, I murmured to Colin, “Shouldn’t Savannah also be congratulated?”

  “Would you congratulate her on her choice?” he asked with a wink. We turned back to Uncle Martin as he continued.

  “I would also like to take this time to give my Savannah and her Jonas their wedding present.”

  He pulled off a sheet covering the sideboard. There was a collective gasp at its beauty. It was even more exquisite than when I had seen it a few weeks before. The mirror gleamed, and the wood shone. The rosewood inlay enhanced the rich mahogany color. Encircling the mirror in a simple interwoven vine pattern with a flower blossom at each corner, the molding highlighted the mirror without overwhelming the simple beauty of the piece.

  “It seems Gabriel will have more clients,” Colin said with a satisfied smile as he watched the appreciative glances from the wedding guests.

  “I should hope,” I said.

  CHAPTER 32

  A WEEK AFTER SAVANNAH’S WEDDING, I sat in the family parlor reading a letter from Florence.

  June 29, 1900

  My Dear Clarissa,

  I cannot thank you nearly enough for helping me to obtain this summer position. I had quite despaired of finding anything suitable for the summer, and now I will have a decent job with room and board. I count myself very fortunate to have you as a friend. You don’t know how I had nearly given up hope. I will even have a holiday at the beach!

  Thank you, dearest Clarissa. I will write again soon.

  Your friend,

  Florence

  “Are you reading a letter from your suffragette friend?” Colin asked. He lay sprawled in comfort in his favorite gentleman’s chair, his waistcoat, tie and coat removed, and his leg hooked over one chair arm. He and I enjoyed the peaceful quiet of the parlor with Mrs. Smythe and Da out for an early evening stroll.

  “No, Sophie is in Newport at an extended house party and far too busy to write me. This is a letter from Florence. One of those snooty society matrons from Savannah’s wedding hired her for the summer.”

  “Good work, Rissa,” Colin said, watching me over the top of his newspaper. “I have a story to tell you that might cheer you up.”

  “Colin, it’s not worth the attempt. You know I am rotten company.”

  Colin watched me with raised eyebrows, as though assessing whether or not to accept my dare. “I went to Austin and Stone’s today,” he said as he sat up to regale me with his tale.

  “You didn’t,” I gasped, envy flooding me at the thought of seeing the curiosity shows made famous by P. T. Barnum in New York City and then expanded to other cities.

  “I did. I went after work.”

  I moved to sit next to him. “How could you have gone there without me?”

  “I’m sorry, Rissa,” Colin said. “You must know, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity.” He shrugged away the rest of his explanation.

  “What was it like?” I asked.

  “Marvelous. Marvelous,” Colin intoned in a dramatic voice, and I laughed, punching him lightly in the arm.

  “That’s Professor Hutchings,” Colin said as way of explaining whom he mimicked. “He’s a master showman and everything is ‘marvelous, marvelous.’” Colin wiggled his eyebrows.

  I laughed again, my spirits lightened for the first time in days.

  “Everything and everyone is a curiosity,” Colin continued. “I have no idea if any of it is real, but it’s a great show.” He sighed, closing his eyes as though reenvisioning what he had seen and heard. When he began to speak again, it was in that deep voice. “Behold the world’s most magnificently malleable man, the charismatic contortionist come to Boston for your pleasurable perusal. Marvelous! Marvelous!”

  I pealed with laughter, my desire to have been there with him increasing as he regaled me with stories. “You’d better tell me no more, or I will die of envy!” I said, sharing a long smile with Colin.

  He patted my shoulder. “At least I was able to make you laugh.”

  I leaned back against the settee, imagining going to Austin and Stone’s, the “marvelous,” fantastical things I would see. I sighed at the thought, frustrated that it had been deemed unacceptable by Mrs. Smythe.

  “I’m surprised at you, Rissa,” Colin said, interrupting my musings, with a disapproving expression on his face.

  “Why, Colin? I hav
e done nothing of interest for quite some time.”

  “You had a good man interested in you, and you have ignored him.”

  “I don’t know what you mean,” I protested as I tried to hide my flush.

  “I spoke with Richard today. Gabe’s been very low since the soiree. Look, I know he was a bit rude at the end, Rissa, but I can’t believe you won’t accept his apology,” Colin reproached me, impatience tinting his voice.

  “Apology? What apology? I haven’t heard a word from him since that night.”

  “Rissa, I know that Gabe came by the house to speak with you a few days after the soiree, and you turned him away. You wouldn’t even come to the door to speak with him.”

  “Who told you that?” I demanded, sitting up straight on the settee. “Mrs. Smythe,” I murmured, staring into space.

  “No, Mrs. Smythe didn’t tell me, Rissa. Richard did.”

  “No, Colin, Mrs. Smythe must have turned him away. I never knew he came here,” I said. “I must speak with him. Will you go with me to his workshop now? It’s not too late, and it’s acceptable if you are with me. Please, Colin?”

  Colin studied me, seeing my sincerity. He smiled. “Of course, Rissa, I’m always ready for an adventure.”

  We took a trolley to Gabriel’s workshop. I noted absently the continued chaos of Haymarket Square even in the early evening. I was lost in thought, worried about how he would receive me after thinking that I had turned him away. We arrived at the workshop, only to find it closed for the night.

  “Oh, Colin! What am I going to do?” I cried, near tears.

  “Let’s take a quick walk to their house. I know where they live, and it’s not far,” he said. grabbing my hand and leading me away from the workshop. “Thankfully it is still light.”

  As we arrived at the North End, the evening gas streetlights slowly flickered on, lending a mysterious, magical air to the streets. The smell of roasting onions wafted from open windows, and men stood on street corners arguing in Italian.

 

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