Who was I to stand up to him? You are the badass in training. The Marine by proxy.
I didn’t have any strength left to fight. You are wounded, but you will heal.
I was nothing. He loved you so much, sweet pea.
Those voices, they would always be a part of me. No matter where I went, they would go with me. And no matter what enemy I was facing, there would always be two Marines standing guard behind me. “Oorah.”
“Excuse me? I told you to move your ass.”
“Go to hell.” He opened his mouth to say something. “No, shut up and listen. You are a worthless piece of shit. If you ever, ever come near me or anyone I care about ever again, I will tell everyone and anyone who will listen exactly who you are and what you do. Do you understand me?”
He laughed. “Honestly, Persephone, who’s going to believe—”
“It will only take one, Dad. One person who even thinks there’s a possibility it might be true and everything is over for you. You don’t get to be in control anymore. You don’t get to hurt me. Get the hell out of my life. You are nothing to me. Nothing, do you understand?” I was yelling by now, walking towards him, backing him down the driveway.
“Persephone, if you don’t get in this car right now, you are never welcome to my home again. Never. You won’t get a dime from us. We will no longer have a daughter. Is that what you want?”
It was my turn to laugh. “More than you will ever know.”
“Fine. To hell with you then, you little ungrateful bitch.”
There were so many things I wanted to say. So many vile, disgusting things I could have hurled at him. But it was enough to see him get in his car and drive away.
Oorah, kiddo, oorah.
EPILOGUE
I never went back to my mother and father’s house. James stayed with me at Ken’s until it was time for me to leave for college. Together, we loaded my small car and the back of his truck with clothes and dorm furnishings. There were students there to help me carry everything to my room, so he didn’t have to. We said our goodbyes in the parking lot.
“Ken would have been so proud of you.”
I tried hard not to cry but didn’t succeed.
I graduated with my degree in counseling and immediately found a job at a crisis center two blocks from the apartment I lived in alone. It was there I met Adam. After our third date, I told him everything—why there were scars all over my body, why he would most likely never meet my parents, and, most importantly, about Ken. Adam didn’t say a word while I talked. He held my hand and listened.
Finally, when I took a breath, he gently turned my wrist over and kissed the scars there. “I know I can’t heal these, but can I help you try?”
We were married six months later at a small bed and breakfast in Eureka Springs. It wasn’t fancy, but neither were we. James stood by my side, and when the minister asked who gives this woman, he answered, “I do.”
Adam and I put off going to Springfield as long as we could, claiming busy schedules and clients who needed us. I didn’t feel particularly bad about this. Mom could have driven south just as easily.
A few months before our two-year anniversary, Mom called, hysterical. Dad was in the hospital, massive heart attack. I didn’t want to go. There was nothing I could do. Nothing I wanted to do. It took Adam close to three hours to convince me I needed, for my own sake, to go say goodbye. It was the first time we had ever fought.
We packed our overnight bags and got on the road. He died before we got there. I would like to say I cried, but I didn’t.
Three years later, our son was born. Austin James. His favorite blanket is an old Marine Corps fleece that still smells like vanilla and sandalwood.
THANK YOU
First and foremost I want to thank my family. My amazing husband and daughter, Dana and Hannah, who supported and believed in me every step of the way. You two are my everything, and I love you.
I have two sisters, a brother, two brothers-in-law, a sister-in-law, two nephews, and a niece (Jenn, Tom, Chelsea, Jeff, Kyle, Erin, Brady, TJ, and Harper) all within a fifteen minute drive. The close proximity may drive us all to drink sometimes, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I couldn’t have done this without all of you.
And my mom and dad, Charley and Lisa Slavens. You two taught me what being a real hero means. Your love, compassion, and unwavering support mean more than I will ever be able to find words to express.
Thank you to my ever-patient editors, Evangeline Jennings and Lucy Middlemass. They deserve sainthood after putting up with me during this process. If you liked the book, thank them. If you didn’t, blame me. It means I didn’t take their advice when I should have.
And finally, thank you. Thank you for giving me a little piece of your time and letting me share Persephone’s story with you. You are the reason I write.
Layla Harding, June 2015
In 2013, approximately 679,000 children were victims of abuse.
A portion of the proceeds from this book will be donated to The Child Advocacy Center in Springfield, Missouri. For more information, please visit their website at www.childadvocacycenter.org
COMING SOON FROM PANKHEARST
FIRST GIRL ON THE MOON
LUCY MIDDLEMASS & EVANGELINE JENNINGS
A Young Adult Collection
Brothers and sisters
Fathers and daughters
First loves
Second thoughts
Elizabeth is furious
Felicity isn’t happy
Magda’s family won’t answer the phone
Isobel is smitten
Vivienne is going to fuck her sister's boyfriend
And me—the girl without a name? I'm all about Alex
And Alex is the first girl on the Moon.
ALSO AVAILABLE FROM PANKHEARST
SINGLES CLUB
Niagara by Evangeline Jennings (January)
getbook.at/Niagara
End Credits by Simon Paul Wilson (February)
getbook.at/EndCredits
Three by Pete Marchetto (March)
getbook.at/Three
Mothers by Lucy Middlemass (April)
getbook.at/Mothers
No Exit by Dan Holloway (May)
getbook.at/NoExit
Bewitched by Kate Garrett (June)
getbook.at/Bewitched
Valentina by Evangeline Jennings (July)
getbook.at/Valentina
Mini by Tee Tyson (August)
getbook.at/Mini
Convertible by Jane Bradley and Lucy Middlemass (September)
getbook.at/Convertible
Frontier by Miriam Vaswani (October)
getbook.at/Frontier
Suck by Charlotte Aspin (November)
getbook.at/Suck
No Christmas by Evangeline Jennings (December)
getbook.at/NoXmas
St Rage by Karen Eisenbrey (January 2015)
getbook.at/StRage
The Wrong Guy by Pat Black (February 2015)
getbook.at/WrongGuy
Wilfrid Moore's Eventful Day by Rosie Gailor (March 2015)
getbook.at/Wilfrid
In The Jungle You Must Wait by Jeremy Johnson (April 2015)
getbook.at/Jungle
HEATHERS
Edited by Lucy Middlemass and ER McTaggart
Twenty four bittersweet slices of teenage life, Heathers tells adolescence the way it is – a struggle. Expect no handsome princes or unicorns. This book comes with a body count. Heroin or ice cream, what's your damage?
A collection of true fiction for Young Adults of all ages, Heathers is the work of writers from the US, UK, Spain, Canada, and China.
getbook.at/Heathers
MERMAIDS AND MOREMAIDS
Edited by Evangeline Jennings and Lucy Middlemass
People like us. A planet like ours. Where five out of every ten teenagers won't live to see twenty-one. For Young Adults of all ages, these are stories of the Flood.
&nb
sp; getbook.at/Mermaids
getbook.at/Moremaids
RIDING IN CARS WITH GIRLS
A sequel of sorts to Cars & Girls, Evangeline Jennings' Riding In Cars With Girls is available now at all good Amazons everywhere.
getbook.at/Evie
"A smashing, original collection likely to be read again and again."
Kirkus Reviews
"Very clever stories crammed with thrills and twists, I can't recommend this read highly enough."
Julie Shaw, Sunday Times best selling author
"Consistently tightly-paced, audacious and action-driven. In signature Jennings style, characters are damaged, damned and dangerous, and never quite what they seem. With her recognisably distinctive, dynamic and subversive voice, Jennings' narrators take us on a twisting, twisted joyride with sex, violence and secrets at each sharp and screeching turn."
For Books' Sake
Table of Contents
Start
Dedication
Cut
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.
16.
17.
18.
19.
20.
21.
22.
23.
Epilogue
Thank You
Cut Page 13