by Paige North
I shake my head. “You hate him so much that you’re willing to make this pregnancy into a piece of good news.”
“We’re only looking out for Bash,” Mom says.
“I know you are, but what if things aren’t as they seem? Maybe I was so sick about hearing that woman tell Colt she’s pregnant that I totally flipped out.” Shame takes me over. “Maybe there’s more to the story.”
“Now, Serena…” my dad starts.
“No.” I sit up. “We’re not going to play the my-daughter-is-faultless game. I might not have been thinking straight before, but now that the shock is wearing off, I can say that Colt has never taken advantage of me. He’s done nothing but try since he came back. And even before that, there was nothing he did to me that I didn’t want. Today, I ran out on him because I’m so unconfident around women like Jennifer Page that I couldn’t fathom why he would want me instead of her.” I swallow back tears. “He might not be the bad guy here.”
Dad stands from his chair. “He sure wasn’t an angel last night. Jack has a black eye to prove that.”
“Colt was defending me.”
“Be that as it may, he’s still a hothead who won’t be able to keep himself together for a week, much less the rest of your lives. He might’ve even gotten himself into trouble with Jennifer Page just because it felt good to be with her at the time.”
I can’t even think about that.
Mom sighs. “Colt is always going to be impulsive. Who’s to say that he wasn’t with Jennifer Page, and now he regrets it? He really can’t control himself, Serena. You know that as well as we do.”
Now I stand, because this is too much. I can’t listen to them pile on Colt like this. I don’t know what I’ll do if it turns out that he actually was with J.Page before we were even together, but I don’t believe what my parents are telling me. They don’t know Colt like I do. He has changed, and I’m the one who took off from the hotel before I gave him a chance to explain what’s going on.
I can’t listen to another word. In fact, I’m not even sure where I belong now, but it’s not in this house.
I walk over to Mom to take Sebastian from her, cuddling him against my chest. “You won’t have to worry about Colt anymore.”
They look at each other in relief, but I’m not done.
“That’s because I’m going to be moving out. You won’t have to deal with any of this on a regular basis anymore.”
“Oh, honey…” Mom starts.
“It’s true. It’s time for me to go out into the world and be my own woman. To be a mother and somehow make all of this work on my own terms.” My heart feels like it’s slipping downward, hardly beating anymore. “I’ve been beholden to your judgments for a long time now, and I know you’re well-intentioned, and I’m so grateful for everything you’ve done for Bash and me, but I’m sick of being judged.”
Their mouths are open as if to argue, but before they can get a word out, I head for my room to start packing enough stuff for at least a few days. Tonight, I’ll check into a hotel or maybe stay with Margot in her apartment. Heck, maybe my best friend will even want to move to someplace bigger and better with me.
I don’t know. I’ll work it out. But, God, I need to sort through this mess with Colt first. After all, he’s always going to be Sebastian’s dad, and I’ve got to at least work with him, no matter what he did or didn’t do with J.Page.
I start to feel sick all over again at the thought of Colt and I apart, only communicating and seeing each other because we’re co-parenting Sebastian.
I wish J.Page and the message she left didn’t exist.
When I emerge from my bedroom, my parents are still in the family room. They’re distant, and when I say goodbye for now, I wonder if things have changed between us for good because of what I said to them. Then I leave the house.
The SUV Colt rented is still parked at the curb since I drove it here from Portland, and I decide that I’ll call the rental agency to come pick it up. Colt still has his fancy sports car to drive around anyway, and I have my own hunk of junk to get me around.
I take one last lingering look at his vehicle, feeling empty. But it’s time to move on to wherever I’m going to end up, even if it hurts.
As I go to my Toyota, Sebastian makes a happy cooing sound, pointing down the street. “Dadadada…”
When I look toward where my baby is pointing, my heart bolts in panic and ecstasy. Colt is standing outside his black sports car with his hands bunched at his sides and a devastated look on his face, waiting for us.
Chapter 3
I hold Sebastian closer to me as he leans in Colt’s direction and laughs, totally oblivious to the fact that Daddy is not in the neighborhood to play or say a casual hi.
As Colt takes us in, I see him melt, even if he’s standing a hundred feet away on the opposite side of the street, away from my house, away from my family. So far away from me.
He starts walking toward us, and with every step he takes, there’s a sonic boom inside of me. Fearful heartbeats. Hopeful pulses that fill me through and through. He stops in front of the driveway, tall, imposing, strung together so tightly that I think he might snap.
“Serena,” he says in a shredded voice, “even if you hate me, even if you don’t want to be with me anymore, I still have to be in the baby’s life.”
I hold Sebastian even closer. Is that why Colt came back here? For Sebastian?
Just as sadness wells in my chest, pain takes over Colt’s gaze, almost as if the mere sight of me is pulverizing his heart.
Then he says, “I’m Bash’s father, no matter what, and I’ll always love him. And you, Serena.” He fists his hands in obvious agony. “I’m always going to love you too.”
A sob crashes out of me. I’ve been waiting for years to hear him say this, from when I was just a little girl looking at him from across the elementary school playground to the college girl gazing into his eyes after he possessed me completely at the lake.
Colt loves me, even after I ran out on him today.
Sebastian touches his tiny fingers to my face, and I realize that my cheeks are wet with tears. I grab his hand and sob once more. No matter what Colt says next, I’m going to believe him fully. He’s here and he loves me and my trust belongs to him. I’m never going to lose faith in this man again. I should never have lost it in the first place, and I should never have thought so little of myself that he would choose someone like Jennifer Page over me.
I want to tell him that I love him too, but I can’t say anything. I can only cry. He looks like my tears are ripping him apart, and he starts coming up the driveway slowly, oh so slowly.
“God, Serena, when you started asking questions about Page, I sank to my lowest moment. I couldn’t believe that I’d disappointed you so many times that you were unable to believe in me when I told you I’d never touched her. I was stunned and angry that I’d spent a lifetime making myself a person who couldn’t be trusted.”
He comes closer, and I try hard, so hard, to get a hold of myself. While I take in a breath, I realize that a BMW has pulled up to the curb nearby. It’s my brother, and he isn’t getting out of the car. I look behind me to see my parents on the porch, and my dad is holding up a staying hand to Jack. Maybe they’re hoping that I’m about to tell Colt to get lost.
But I finally find my own voice instead. “I trust you, Colt. I’m sorry I was so fearful about Jennifer Page that I couldn’t possibly imagine how you could choose me over her. I’m always going to trust you…and I’m always going to love you.” My voice hitches on another sob. “Always.”
Colt keeps closing the distance between us carefully, as if he fears I’ll change my mind and run again. But Sebastian is squealing now, holding out his arms to him, and I break out in a smile that has me laughing and crying at the same time.
He loves me.
With an intensely adoring gaze, Colt stands in front of us, then thumbs a tear away from my cheek. He cups my face with one hand and doe
s the same to Sebastian, who’s looking up at his father as if he’s been dreaming about the moment he would see him again. As Colt bends down to kiss me, I grip his arm. It’s a soft, reverent kiss, full of more I love yous and promises, and when he’s done, he leans his forehead against mine.
My breath is tight in my lungs, even as my blood pumps through me. “I’m going to be at your side from now on, Colt. I’m never running away from you again, especially during all this J.Page stuff. We’re going to get through this together.”
“She’s going to get ugly,” he warns me.
“From the second she stepped into your hotel suite, I should’ve seen how ugly she really is. She can’t get any uglier.”
He looks down at me with such a devastating smile that the earth seems to move beneath me, and I hold him and my son even tighter. Then he glances up to see my parents on the porch, and I look back at them too.
Mom and Dad aren’t saying a word. Neither is Jack, and when I see him still in his car with a blank expression on his face, I know that the truth has finally hit home: what Colt and I have can never be broken. We’re going to be together forever, and I think my family knows now that they can either fight us and lose, or join us. Maybe it’ll take some time for them to admit it, but as Colt goes to my car and opens the back door to take out the baby seat, I finally feel like we’ve won in a big way.
Now we need to do it in an even bigger way with J.Page.
“Serena,” Colt says that evening as he saunters out of the hotel suite’s bedroom. “You’re not going to believe this.”
I stop typing on my laptop. I’ve been inputting an assignment for my Master’s class while Sebastian plays by my side with his new toy train on the carpet. “What now? Did J.Page leave a message that she’s having quintuplets?”
He grins at me as if he’s glad we can at least joke about it. Hell, we’ll be needing a whole lot of lightness during this war with J.Page.
“Actually,” he says, “I just got word that Jack dropped the charges against me.”
I blink at him. “Seriously?”
“Seriously. It looks like I won’t need permission to travel out of state because of my arrest after all. That means we can leave for LA to take care of this situation with Page.”
Both of us absorb that for a second or two. Sebastian makes one of his high happy sounds, and we smile along with him. Things are starting to look up. Finally. But what’s up can go down, and with the level of nastiness that J.Page plays at, we need to be prepared for any stumbles.
I toy with Sebastian’s brown hair, which is growing in thicker by the day. “Do you think my family saw that we’re really together, and that’s why Jack extended this olive branch?”
“Could be, but if they really wanted to make their peace with us, they would’ve told us about this in person.”
With a sinking feeling, I know he’s right. “Maybe this is a start.”
And, after that start, everything suddenly goes into high gear. I don’t go back to my parents’ house to get more of my things, because Colt has been online buying anything and everything Sebastian and I will ever need. Then I resign from my teaching position so I can relocate with Colt down to Southern California to live in his new, fancy house in Century City. But giving up my job isn’t as painful as my goodbye to Margot, who promises to visit, even after I assure her that we’ll be up here frequently because of Colt’s mom…and hopefully my family too.
But our loose ends here aren’t all sad. When Colt and I drop by to see his mother, my heart sings. Thanks to her movie-star son, she’s got a new house and a new car, and she no longer has to work two jobs or even one; that means she has all the time in the world to volunteer at the local pet shelter and paint as many landscapes as she wants in her art room. And when she meets her grandson for the very first time… God, everything seems almost perfect.
Almost.
My breathing quickens every time I ponder what’s ahead of us. There’s still so much up in the air, like what’s going to happen to Colt’s career now that he’s on the outs with J.Page.
Then the news finally hits the tabloids that she’s pregnant with Colt’s child, and the shit really hits the fan.
Everyone is trying to get a hold of Colt—the press, his team…everyone. But the worst part is that his agent calls asking him to attend a meeting tomorrow.
We discreetly take a flight to LA, then Colt takes me straight to the home he bought with part of his gargantuan paycheck for Mystery Man. When I see the ranch style house for the first time, I’m so proud of him I could burst. The property is in a guard-gated community, and there’s a spacious, grassy backyard where Sebastian will be able to grow up playing, and among all the rooms are four bedrooms, a billiard room, a home theater, a fitness room, and a state-of-the-art kitchen with a marble island in the center. The whole place is decorated like a villa on the French Riviera or something, with clean, warm colors, and I know that I’ve finally found my place.
After we get settled, Colt and I sit on a leather sectional sofa and prop our feet up on a glass coffee table, our gazes on the vaulted ceiling. Sebastian is resting on Colt’s big chest, and neither of us says anything for a while. I can tell Colt is worried about tomorrow. He’s been keeping his stress inside, carrying all of it on those wide shoulders, and I slip my hand into his.
“It’s all going to work out,” I say.
“I’m not so sure about that. Page is building up steam with this story and running her mouth to anyone who’ll listen.”
I hate seeing him like this, and I squeeze his hand to reassure him. “If you’re too much trouble for your agency, there are other places that would jump at the chance to snatch up a rising star like you.”
He’s quiet for a moment, then he slips his thick arm around me. I can feel his edginess in the tightness of his muscles, even if he’s so very good at hiding it. I want to kiss his troubles away, and I will…later, after Sebastian is sleeping.
Colt sighs roughly. “The bottom line is this: if Page doesn’t get her way with me, she’ll shut me down completely. She’s that much of a viper, and tomorrow I need to convince my agent that I’m worth keeping and that I’m not at fault. I don’t even know if that’s possible, because you heard Murray tell me before that he’s on Team Page all the way. I’m a bottom feeder compared to her.”
“You’ll fight the good fight and win.”
“I aim to. And I want you to go with me.”
I look at him, but he’s deadly serious. “They’ll let me in on a meeting?”
“I’ve already told them you’re coming, and I wouldn’t take no for an answer.”
I blow out a breath. “Okay. Then we’re going to do this. But—”
“I know—what about Bash?” He rubs our baby’s back, and Sebastian’s eyelids get heavier. “I have a personal assistant here in LA. She’ll watch him for us.”
A stranger taking care of our son? Colt clearly sees the horror on my face.
“Carrie Leigh is very trustworthy,” he says. “She’ll come early in the morning for breakfast so you can get to know her. She’s got a steel magnolia vibe you’ll love, and she’s got a lot of experience with kids. When she was nineteen, she started raising her three brothers and sisters when their parents passed away.”
“She sounds…qualified.”
To reassure me, he gently kisses my temple, and my circuits go haywire.
“There’s a bed upstairs that’s waiting to welcome us home,” he whispers, stirring my hair and warming my ear. “And as soon as this little guy goes to sleep, we’re breaking it in.”
I’ve never silently rooted for Sebastian to get to sleep so much in my life, and once his breathing evens out, Colt snags me with that hot, yearning gaze, telling me it’s time.
In that bed, I make him forget about the meeting at the agency until, sometime during the night, I awaken to find myself alone. I find Colt in the family room, his back hunched as he sits deep in thought. I go to him, sitting
by his side and leaning my head on his shoulder.
He only kisses my head as we spend the rest of the night in silence.
Chapter 4
It turns out that Colt’s personal assistant Carrie Leigh is as motherly as he promised she would be. She’s a polished woman in designer sweats with a deep Southern accent and short, curly brown hair, and the minute she shows up at the house the next morning before Colt’s meeting with his talent agency, Sebastian takes to her. After I let her know the baby’s schedule and where the food is and a million other little details that only prove what a hot mess I am today, we sit down for breakfast. Carrie Leigh tells me about her husband and the brothers and sisters she’s raised, and when Colt finally enters the kitchen, I love her even more because she doesn’t get that googly gleam in her eyes that most girls do when he’s in their presence.
He’s wearing a black sport coat with a tee shirt underneath, plus faded jeans with boots. His hair is tied back, and he gives off the impression that he cares about this meeting, but not so much that he needs to overly impress anyone. I wish I were as calm and cool as he is, and I keep fidgeting as I smooth down the skirt of my pleated, ladylike floral dress.
Before we leave, Colt bends down to Sebastian in his high chair so that they’re eye to eye. “You good, little man?”
Sebastian smiles brilliantly, and it’s enough to fill me with strength and warmth. Colt kisses him on the forehead, then we say goodbye to Carrie Leigh and we’re off.
The drive to Wilshire Boulevard is sunny and lined with palm trees. When we arrive at the shimmering high rise building that houses the agency, a valet relieves us of the car. My heart is beating a hundred times a second, but as the security desk and lobby personnel distantly greet Colt, he’s not beaten down by the side eyes that they’re giving him: he’s his usual, charming self, wearing that sexy smile while holding my hand.