by Jen Wylie
"Baelan," she whispered, tears catching in her throat. She didn't know what to do. "No. I don't…"
He nodded once and straightened. "Ah, I am to take it like a man."
A tear slipped down her cheek as she moved forward, the desire to just hold him overcoming her.
"Go on now."
She turned to find another Baelan, who gave her a weak smile, though she didn't miss how it wavered, just a bit.
"So sorry, my lovely. You shouldn't have had to see that."
Her head swung around quickly, just in time to see the other Baelan limp off into the trees. She watched until he disappeared, trying to gather herself and failing.
"You're breaking my heart," she whispered, finally looking at him as he stepped to her side.
He regarded her quietly for a moment, his usual happy face solemn. "That has never been my intention. This," his waved his hand around them, "you were never meant to see."
"I don't know how to help you."
A faint smile crossed his lips as he shook his head and then looked away. "Don't even try, Aro. I am well beyond any kind of help. I am what I am." Clearing his throat, he looked back at her and held out his hand. "Come, we've things to do."
Slipping her hand into his, she nodded, remaining quiet. She didn't know what to say.
They walked for a short while before he suddenly squeezed her hand. "It is…nice. That you would think to help me. I…appreciate that."
Heat burned her cheeks, so she kept her gaze on the ground. Crunch. Crunch.
Finally, they reached his safe place and her tense muscles relaxed as they stepped into the flowers. "I'm sorry, I don't know how I ended up over there."
He shrugged, not meeting her eyes. There was a brief, awkward silence before he turned to her again. "How are you doing?"
"Fine."
His lips pressed together at her lie. His gaze flicked over her shoulder and he huffed out a breath.
"I worry," the assassin said from behind her and she whirled around in surprise. "I worry you will hesitate now. To kill." He stepped closer and grasped her chin in his hand, forcing her gaze to remain on him. "You must not, Arowyn."
Heart beating quickly, she swallowed the lump in her throat and nodded. He dropped his hand and stepped back.
"Wait!" When he paused, she scrambled for something to say. "Do you feel no remorse?"
His dark gaze turned…haunted, before he looked away. "One becomes…numb, after a while."
Numb. She wished she felt numb.
"Arowyn." He paused. "I am sorry that I cannot protect you from everything. I would, if I could."
"I know." For some strange reason, she did.
"Don't hesitate," Bay said again and then turned and walked away.
Baelan cleared his throat and she turned around.
He forced a smile. "Now. This won't take long. Close your eyes and just…feel. Listen. Ready?"
Eyes closed, she nodded.
"My name is Baelan. I am human. I am twenty years old. The sun is purple." She smiled slightly. "Can you feel it?"
Frowning, she shook her head.
"Concentrate. On me. You know me. Listen to my voice. How I speak. Feel my words as you hear them. Listen for the truth. Listen for the lie." Her brows drew together as she concentrated. "I have ten sisters," he continued slowly. "Carrots are my favorite food."
A strange whisper of something came over her at his obvious lies. An unsettling feeling in her chest. It wasn't strong, but if she paid attention she could sense it.
"I am an Elf. My hair is brown. The Queen is insane."
"I feel it."
"Good."
She opened her eyes. "Does it work with mind-speech too?"
"Unfortunately, no." He grinned. "Feel free to lie all you like."
She laughed, shaking her head, though his comment made her a bit uneasy.
His smile faded away. "I killed him to protect you. No other reason."
Nothing in her chest, not even a twinge. She nodded.
"You can trust me," he said softly. "I will never hurt you."
Also truth. For some reason though, the words send a shiver up her spine.
His gaze flitted around her face for a moment and then he relaxed, leaning back and running a hand through his hair.
"You know, if I was going to cause trouble, I'd seduce you away from Shael," he said with a sudden wicked grin.
Startled, she looked over at him. His words made her frown. "I thought you said he'd never come, that I wasn't good enough for him. Why would you bother?"
"That doesn't mean he doesn't care for you in some way. I am here, after all. It would most certainly make him angry."
"You told me that you and Prince were friends."
"We were. And then we weren't." He smiled faintly and then looked away. "Some days I hate him. Most days… I'm just angry, because things could have been different. If some things hadn't been said, hadn't been done. Some days I'm just sad, when I think of how it was before and how it could have been if we both weren't such arrogant idiots."
She snorted at that, but sobered when he turned to her with such sad eyes. They reminded her of Prince, and she wondered if sometimes, his eyes had been so sad because he'd been thinking of his lost friendship. "Maybe you can be friends again one day," she said.
His laugh was sharp and brittle. "Some things you can't forget, Arowyn. Some things can't be undone…or unsaid. They just fester and the best you can do is try not to think of them too often."
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
"What's done is done, as they say. Sometimes what is broken can't be fixed." He grinned and waved a hand around. "What might have been won't ever be. And all that nonsense. Come, the others should be ready to head out by now."
She wanted to ask him more questions, but saw the shadows of past hurt still on his face so held her tongue and just returned to her own mind.
Though she now believed Baelan hadn't killed the Elf to cause trouble, other doubts rose in her mind. Meeting the other him, the way he directed their conversation, left her suspicious. Had he wanted her to pity him? If so, then why? What would he gain? She had too many questions without answers. The only thing she could do was pay attention, not let her guard down, and be careful. Eventually, he'd slip up or she would figure it out.
∞ ∞ ∞
Kei and Baelan walked quietly beside her as they approached the village. Being so close to a Were settlement, she'd called in the Fey and a crowd of them now followed behind her. Garen roamed around them, ensuring no stragglers got left behind or into mischief.
Rhee-En had finally spoken to her again the night before, instructing her to meet with him when they arrived at the village of Hollowbrook.
Though originally, she planned to collect supplies and head out immediately, he told her they would stay the night. She didn't argue. It'd been four days since the incident with the Elf.
Heshel. She closed her eyes for a moment. His name was Heshel.
Rhee-En hadn't spoken to her since his original rant until the night before. His tone hadn't changed much. She wasn't looking forward to this meeting.
She still hadn't heard from Roan, either. Which set her stomach in knots for an entirely different reason. She tried to send him an apology twice, but he never responded. Since she doubted he'd been asleep at the time, he was ignoring her. It hurt. She wanted to make things right. Regret for what she said filled her more and more every day. She hadn't meant it. He did mean something to her, was more than just a simple friend, but she didn't know how to put her feelings into words. Thinking about what he was to her just left her feeling confused, which was why she avoided it.
Were came to meet them and she helped get their large number of Fey settled at the edge of the village. The stiffness in her shoulders eased somewhat when the Were gave them no problems. They weren't overly friendly but were courteous enough and ensured they were comfortable.
Looking over the growing group, she rubbed at her
forehead and nudged Kei. "It's getting a lot harder to move. We're finding a lot more now."
He understood her unspoken question. "A few weeks. Then we'll go. It's not time."
Of course it wasn't. He kept saying that but would never tell her when it would be time for them to go to Furia.
Nerves fluttered in her stomach, but she smiled, excited he'd finally given her something. A few weeks. Soon they would make their way to Furia. City of the Fey.
"Rhee-En has sent for us," Baelan said, walking up to them.
Her stomach churned, but she followed him into the village, Kei trailing behind her. A Were met them and led them to a small log cabin. He left them at the door and she paused a moment, gathering her courage.
Kei's fingers briefly brushed her lower back. "It will be fine," he whispered.
She met his golden gaze with her own and then nodded once, before opening the door and walking inside. It took her eyes a moment to adjust to the dim room. It was small with a table and a few chairs. The alpha sat in one, a mug of something in front of him.
He didn't rise as they entered.
Gesturing them to sit, she did, Kei and Baelan to either side of her.
He didn't offer them anything to eat or drink. Which rather relieved her, she didn't know if she'd have been able to hold it down. However, both inactions spoke of disrespect, and she wasn't quite sure what to do about it. Rhee-En was not Terris, but a strong alpha.
"You look ill, Aro-En." His voice was still delicious, but contained a slight biting edge.
Straightening her shoulders, she raised her chin. "It's been a difficult few days."
His blue and gold eyes regarded her calmly from his scarred face. "So it has," he finally said. He shifted forward. "Well, then. Update me on the Fey and your plans."
Relaxing slightly, she cleared her throat and did so, watching his face carefully as she spoke. He didn't give anything away and she wondered again how old he was. Centuries at least.
When she finished he glanced down at his mug and then took a long drink before leaning back and giving them his attention again.
"We have word from our people in the human cities of growing unrest within Rivenward."
Her brows rose at the topic. Why was he telling her this? The reason nearly stole her voice. "I…see. The Queen is getting even crazier?" Inside, she held back her panic, barely. Was Prince in the middle of it? Was he even still alive?
The alpha frowned. "It would seem so." He paused.
"Is he dead," she asked quietly, eyes going to her hands.
"No, Aro-En. No," he said, his voice suddenly softer. "I'm afraid I have few details, but I do know that."
She nodded, relief letting her breathe again.
"In the north," Rhee-En continued, changing the subject, "The Frans have now taken four cities and are marching on a fifth."
Shock nearly knocked her out of her chair. She'd heard they were attacking in the north, but to have moved so quickly... "Wither me. How big is their army?"
"Quite large and growing with each new city they take. Most of those they don't kill are forced into it."
"They're not going to stop," she whispered, the sickness in her stomach rising again.
"At some point, they will have to. For winter surely. They barely have supplies for the army they have now. They are only surviving from pillaging as they move. Once the snows come, many will die."
She frowned. The Frans weren't stupid. "The crops have been planted. If they stop in the fall and use the slaves and army to harvest they won't be in nearly as dire straits."
Rhee-En stared at her for a long moment before cursing under his breath.
Guess he hadn't thought of that.
"Are the Were going to do anything?"
"We've offered our assistance and it was refused," he said, his voice nearly a growl. "The most we can do now is move refugees south through the forest when a city is attacked."
"The Were are monsters, so are the Frans," she continued quickly, "But I guess they are keeping with the enemy they know. Someone is bound to accept."
"I hope they do before it's not too late."
She bit her lip, mind whirling. The Frans had already attacked the northern Were. If they took all of the coast… "They'll go after you next." It would be a slaughter…
"Probably, and it couldn't be worse timing."
Or maybe not. She sat back, grimacing. By the time the Frans took the entire coast, the Vor would be all over them from the east.
"The King has plans in place," the Were continued more lightly. "I just wanted to keep you informed."
"Thank you." She bit her lip, worried about Bo. She'd have to make sure he knew what was going on. And get him and Elaina out of Westport if she needed to. The way things were going, it would be best to send them across the sea.
"Is there anything else you would like to discuss?"
"No." She pushed her chair back, but then stopped and looked up at the alpha, uncertain if she should speak or not. His head tilted to the side, noticing her hesitation. "I'm sorry," she finally managed to say, her voice barely a whisper.
"I know," he answered quietly. "However, you will speak with the king directly from now on, rather than going through me."
He was still angry. She couldn't really blame him. Forcing a faint smile, she nodded her agreement.
"I'll give you back the young Were. But Aro-En, if something happens to them, I'm holding you responsible."
She opened her mouth to agree, but then paused as his words sank in. "No. Keep them." At his frown, she continued, "The prophecy did not mention Heshel. It doesn't mention them." She wasn't sure about that, but anyway… "I can't control if we are attacked by Vor. Or Elves. Or if they'll get too close to a Fey." Her voice rose. "And I certainly can't control whatever Damon might do. So, no. I won't be held responsible for things I can't control."
His brows rose and for a moment, she thought a smile twitched at his lips. He bowed his head toward her slightly. "You are correct. Very well."
"The Were are my friends," she continued, her voice soft and earnest, wishing he'd believe her. "I would never let anything happen to any of them if I could prevent it."
"I believe you. As I said, very well. They are yours again."
Oh. She hadn't realized that's what he meant. She stood and concentrated on pushing the chair back in to hide her embarrassment.
Walking back to where the Fey camped, she ran the conversation over in her mind and worry suddenly clamped around her chest, making her stumble. She'd never realized how she possessed so very little control over her life.
Kei grabbed her elbow, keeping her upright. "What's wrong?"
Everything. She shook her head and forced a smile. "Just tired."
Baelan gave her a solemn knowing look. At least he knew when to keep quiet.
She shouldn't have been surprised the Were set up a huge dinner near the Fey, bringing out what tables they had and serving food and drink. They'd known they were coming, and she felt a bit guilty how she thought the Were would ignore them because of what happened.
Sitting on a bench near the end of a long table, jammed between Kei and Baelan, she tried not to think at all as she ate. She wasn't hungry, but eating was easier than dealing with their annoyance if she just picked at her food.
Baelan, sitting at the end of the bench, reached by her to grab another slab of meat. Her brows rose, since it was at least his fifth, but then she saw him hold it out to Garen, curled up around the end of the bench with his large head nearly in the Elf's lap.
"You should give him some vegetables, too."
Baelan's brows rose as he looked down at the Were.
Don't you dare, Garen responded, his ears flicking back, and they both smiled.
She turned to Kei, but he was turned away from her, in an energetic conversation with the Fey beside him. Well, the girl talked away, Kei nodding every now and then. How…cute.
Her gaze darted to Rhee-En who sat on the other
side of the table, but closer to the middle. She'd been relieved when he hadn't sat near them, yet a twinge of sadness still echoed. Things changed so quickly. The constant blanket of sorrow that seemed to smother her thickened. His gaze met hers and she forced a weak smile before turning her attention back to the half-eaten meal on her plate.
Grabbing a slice of bread, she took a bite and forced herself to chew.
Aro? You busy?
She stopped mid-chew, startled. Bo? No, we're just eating. Is something wrong?
Panic seized her chest. Bo rarely contacted her, and if so never so early. It wasn't even dark out yet. Her head jerked around, looking to see if he'd contacted the others as well, but they continued on as they had been.
We're fine, pup.
Swallowing the lump of bread in her mouth, she tried to calm down. Good. Good. We are, too. Rhee-En gave us back the Were. I have to talk to the king directly now, though. He's still rather angry with us, I think.
Could have been worse. A bit of time will calm everyone down. He knows it was an accident.
I know.
Kei's hand brushed her arm. "What is it?"
"Bo," she said quietly, glancing up from her plate she'd just been staring at. She shrugged as his head tipped to the side in confusion.
So… I've news but I don't know how… His voice drifted off. Heard a rumor a few days ago. But Silas was by today and…
What was it he didn't want to tell her? Her thoughts drifted back to what the alpha told her earlier. Were the Frans closer to Westport than they'd all thought? Her heart starting thumping harder in her chest. What, Bo?
I suppose it's best just to say it. Roan is dead.
Her heart missed a few beats. Her lungs forgot how to work. "No," she whispered. He can't be, she finally said, desperation lacing her voice.
I'm sorry, pup. I trust Silas, though. He certainly wouldn't lie about this to us, to you.
But…no. How? He can't be… But she hadn't heard from the pirate in days. He'd not been answering her because…because…
I don't have any more information than that. I wish I did. I truly am sorry. I know you were friends.