It seemed like an eternity waiting. When Kevin spoke, she was surprised by his words.
“You know what you need to know, and the less you know, the better.”
Marina heard the frustration in Maggie’s voice. “Who is she that she’s so damn important you won’t even tell me about her?”
“She’s an assignment, Maggie. Nothing more,” Kevin said firmly.
Marina’s heart sank. Nothing more. She should’ve known that from the beginning. It was foolish for her to look at him in any other way than a captain sent to watch her. Damn you, Kevin Collins, for kissing me. For making me think that . . . that you cared. Was that all a ploy or were you just bored and sought some distraction? Either way, damn you.
She didn’t want or need to hear anything else. It was all too clear. She was all alone in this mess. The only problem was she’d allowed herself to start caring about him. Marina closed her bedroom door, not wanting to face either of them. She didn’t bother to take off her dress. Instead, she lifted the blanket, slipped beneath it, and pulled it tightly around her.
Nothing more. His words rang through her again and again. Marina looked over to the urn that was only a few feet away. She’d been wise not to tell him what it contained. He wanted walls between them, so now she’d let him have them.
Closing her eyes, she wished the pain she felt would go away, and tomorrow she’d be stronger, ready to face whatever might come. Tonight she felt no such thing. All she wanted to do was hide and never come out. It was irrational.
Pulling the covers over her head she fought back the tears that threatened to flow. He never even noticed my dress. Damn. I never knew it could hurt like this. The pain of knowing you’re not as important to someone as you thought you were. And realizing they’re the one you want.
The battle was lost as she cried herself to sleep.
Chapter Ten
‡
Kevin needed to keep his voice down. Marina was still sleeping, but he didn’t trust her not to wake and try to listen. Don’t blame her one bit. She’s lost all control over her life. It must be scary as fuck.
“There has to be something we don’t know yet. That asshole holds a lot of power, and we know that’s driven by money. We need to find out if he is the head or if we’re being set up so we don’t see what they’re really up to.” Kevin had been pondering this question all night. With no answers, he had no choice but to reach out to Mark. They couldn’t afford missing something; even if it looked insignificant, it might not be.
“We couldn’t find any family, wife, or children. JT’s life seemed to be work and nothing else. That concerns me. No one’s ever there to question what he’s doing. I’ve confirmed he’s traveled overseas at least twice a year for the past decade. That might be where he made the connections. We don’t know if they sought him out, or if he went looking for them.”
“Mark, if we’re wrong—”
“We can’t be,” Mark said sharply.
Kevin wished they had more to go on than just their gut instincts. Each of them had a distraction that could cloud their judgment. All he could do was trust they were keeping their eyes on the ball.
“How is the search going for a new dog?” Kevin hoped they’d found a safe house to meet the requirements Marina needed. Most places didn’t include space to set up for research.
“Johnson thinks he found the right one.”
“Mark, this dog has to have everything we need. Remember, this dog will be working with someone with special needs. A Golden Labrador would work best. It won’t do us any good if it’s not the right one.”
“Roger that,” Mark said.
They knew if their phones were being monitored they could block their location, but the words needed to be coded for anything around the word lab or chemist. As far as they knew, JT and the others only suspected they had Marina. That is the way Kevin wanted to keep it. Because until JT was sure, it meant he’d need to spread his men out. Once he had confirmation, it might all come crashing down quickly.
As soon as Kevin ended the call, Marina asked, “Why do you need a dog? Is that going to be my new bodyguard when you leave me next?”
Just as I thought. Women. He turned around and saw she was still in the same dress she’d been wearing last night. Her eyes were puffy as though she’d been crying. He knew it was time to come clean with some of the information, but not everything.
“It’s the code for a safe house.”
“And I’m someone with special needs?”
He shook his head. “You require a lab?”
Marina nodded.
“Hence special needs.”
She walked over and sat on the couch he’d been occupying all night. Marina looked as though she wanted to talk. Did she have something she’d been holding back on, too? Most likely yes. I’d be a fool to think otherwise.
“Is there something you want to tell me?” Kevin asked but stood where he was. This needed to be a serious conversation and being so close to her wasn’t going to get what either of them needed.
Without looking at him, Marina said, “I think we both have things we need to say.” She was right about that.
Kevin said, “Let me go first.” Marina turned to him and waited. He wasn’t sure where the hell to start. Should he apologize for the kiss or for leaving her without letting her know? Those were things that should be spoken, yet it’d take the conversation in a direction it couldn’t go. Personal.
Kevin walked over and sat in the seat opposite Marina. He didn’t want to be towering over her when they spoke. He needed her to trust him, not fear him. Trust wasn’t going to be easy for either of them. He understood that. All he could do was offer her what he could tell her now and hope she’d accept that. There are things no one can know. Even people on their team were being left in the dark on some things. Maggie found that out last night.
He kept his voice low and serious. Kevin didn’t want to frighten her. That didn’t mean he was going to make light of the situation either. “Did you notice we took an abrupt detour?”
“I did.” Marina sat with her hands folded on her lap, meeting him straight in the eyes. She was trying to read him.
Good. You should question things. It means you’re stronger than you give yourself credit for. And damn it, you’re going to need that strength. “I received word that the location we were headed for had been compromised.”
“You mean attacked.”
Good ears, darling. “Yes.”
“Were there any casualties?”
He saw the concern in her eyes. Kevin hadn’t forgotten when he told her she was responsible for people’s deaths. He was wrong saying that before and wasn’t about to make that mistake again.
“There were injuries on our side. A few casualties on theirs. It’s expected in such matters.” He looked her squarely in the eyes and continued, “Marina, none of this is your fault.”
She sat upright and said, “I believe you told me otherwise a few days ago.”
“I didn’t have all the facts then.” Don’t now either. All I do know is you’d never intentionally hurt another person.
“So you trust me?” Her question was more of a dare for him to say otherwise.
“I believe you’re a good person.” He wasn’t about to use the word trust. There were many things left unanswered. Until she was willing to open up to him regarding them, his trust only went so far.
“But not one you trust.” Her voice was soft as though he’d hurt her deeply.
“Give me a reason to trust you, Marina. Tell me what your research is and why they’re willing to kill to get their hands on it.”
That’s what it all came down to. They were all in the dark, fighting an enemy that when one was taken out, two more would appear, and she held the one thing that linked it all together. If she wanted or expected him to trust her, then she’d need to start giving him what they needed. The cat and mouse game wasn’t getting them anywhere, and time was running out.
&
nbsp; “Kevin, I can’t tell you.”
The team that was supposed to be protecting her was spread out over the country right now, and they were vulnerable. Kevin knew if they were found, he couldn’t stop them. If he was going to die protecting her and her research, he had a right to know what it was.
He understood her need to protect herself, but if she didn’t start trusting him, neither of them was going to make it out of this alive. How could he express that to her without panicking her and shutting her down totally? Maybe that’s exactly what I need to say. Be blunt and straight forward.
“I don’t believe you understand how . . . delicate of a situation we’re in. I’m going to do everything I can to protect you. Us. What you tell me will stay between us. But I have the right to know what I’m fighting for. Wouldn’t you agree?”
Kevin meant what he said. If she confided in him, he wouldn’t divulge the information to anyone without her permission. It was crossing his line of duty to bond with her. He was running with his gut instinct, and it was telling him to listen and trust.
Marina got up and started pacing the living room floor. He’d reached her somewhat because she was contemplating telling him. Whatever it was, he could tell it was eating her up inside. He wanted to get off his chair, go over, and shake her until she told him.
Out of nowhere she left the room, went into the bedroom, and came out with her mother’s urn. He wanted to hear what deadly creation people were after, and she obviously wanted to talk about her mother. This is not the information I want to hear. What the hell? I’ll humor her and hopefully after this we can get back to the business at hand.
Marina sat on the couch again, holding the urn on her lap. It made him uncomfortable. He could see she was very emotional about what she was about to say. He certainly didn’t do well with women’s tears. Usually, he came up with a damn good excuse to leave before they started crying. That wasn’t an option this time. This was his only chance to learn what this was all about. It looks like it’s going to be the long version.
“My mother’s gone. She died my first year of college.”
“I’m sorry.”
“She was so happy that I’d received a full scholarship to the university, but she didn’t want me so far away from home. We were best friends, not just mother and daughter. So when she died in a car accident, I had no one to turn to except for my father.”
The general. Damn, that sucks. Kevin came from a close, happy family and his parents were both very supportive. Although his father’s health was deteriorating quickly with ALS, at least he wasn’t a cold bastard like her father was.
“I thought maybe I’d become a doctor or nurse, but my father saw my natural skill and pushed me to become a biochemist. As you can see, he got what he wanted. Always did.”
Kevin wasn’t about to interrupt or ask anything until he knew she was finished. She wanted to lay the groundwork for him, and he truly was glad she was opening up to him. He knew he was only going to hate her father more after hearing it.
“My father was a . . . I don’t even know. We never spoke except to talk about my work. I knew nothing about him, and he knew even less about me. The only thing we shared was DNA. So when I was doing my research, he ignored me until something piqued his interest. I’d been working on a cure for Alzheimer’s. I was so close to achieving it, and I thought my father would be proud of me, finally. Want me in his life. But close isn’t enough in science. So I tried altering my formula, and that’s when . . .”
Marina hugged her urn so tightly as though it was all she had. Kevin was trying to follow her story but felt as though he was missing a big piece.
A tear rolled down her cheek as she continued, “It wasn’t supposed to go this way. I wanted to do something good with my life. Create a cure and made a difference in people’s lives. Never did I suspect such a minor alteration to the compound would be so disastrous.”
“What changed? What does it do?” This was exactly what he needed to know. He hoped she’d explain in a terminology he understood.
“Instead of a cure that could safely be added to the water supply, it now can render a person paralyzed within minutes of ingestion.”
“What do you mean by paralyzed? How paralyzed?” He didn’t know if there were different stages or levels of it, but he needed as much information as he could get from her.
“Anyone driving or flying will no longer be able to control their vehicles. That would be just the start. So many people being affected immediately would leave the country defenseless.”
“I must be missing something. How would a pilot and a taxi driver be affected by the same attack?”
“Through the water supply, Kevin. It’s an additive, remember? It gains potency in water, and anyone who drinks from a contaminated water supply would become fully paralyzed. Think about all the water we consume each day in this country. It’d affect any bottled water as well. I haven’t been able to find any sterilization system that kills the virus.”
“That’s . . . terrible.” So many other words to describe what she was telling him came to mind, but he refrained from using them in front of her. “How long until it wears off?”
“It doesn’t,” Marina said flatly.
Holly shit! This virus was something that could never get into anyone’s hands. I don’t want them using it on us, and I sure don’t want us using it on anyone else either.
He felt for her so much. It was a burden she carried with her. He couldn’t even begin to imagine what it was like for Marina. There was no hiding from it. He remembered Marina telling him she could erase all traces of the formula from everywhere except from her own mind. As long as she’s alive so is the risk.
Kevin wanted to pull her into his arms and tell her that it’d be okay. He couldn’t do that. She wasn’t foolish enough to believe it if he tried. Her expression, the pain and fear in her eyes, said as much. You’re an amazingly strong woman. I’m here protecting you, but you sit there trying to protect the world.
Could she protect them? Was it too late? “Marina, is there a way to stop this?” He was afraid of the answer.
Gripping the urn yet even tighter, Marina closed her eyes and said, “I believe there is, but if I’m wrong . . . then . . . they will have won.”
It was pure hell questioning her instead of consoling her. Kevin needed to get past this first. There would be time for him to be her . . . friend? Lover? I don’t know, maybe both. Right now he needed to be Captain Collins.
“Tell me how we beat this.”
Opening her eyes, she said, “All this time I’ve been working on creating a vaccine. I’ve done as much testing as I could, and it’s almost ready for the final testing stage.”
He was hopeful for the first time. This sounded like great news. So why don’t you look happy about it? What aren’t you tell me?
“And you need the lab to do this.”
Marina nodded. “Without it, I won’t be able to make the final adjustment so it can be tested properly.”
Fuck. Mark, we need that location now. No one had realized how close she was. None of us even asked.
“How long do you think it’ll take once you’re set up?” He wasn’t a scientist. For all, he knew final testing meant years, not months or days.
“If all goes well, maybe a week or two.”
That was doable. At least, he hoped so. “Is there anything we can do until then?” Something to speed things up?
She shook her head.
He’d gotten what he needed. Marina could relax now, yet she still was sitting there holding the urn as though afraid to let go. He understood. It was her mother’s ashes. She was feeling alone and wanted to be close to her. Somehow he needed to show her it was okay to let go. Not forget, but not hold on so tightly that you can’t see what’s right in front of you. Because I’m here for you Marina. You’re not alone.
Reaching out Kevin touched her hand and said, “Why don’t I put this someplace safe for you.”
He hadn’t expected her hands to have a death grip on it. “Don’t touch it!”
Okay. She’s not ready. Kevin felt bad that when she asked to see her mother, the request was denied. Now he saw how much it meant to her. Still, does.
“I should’ve stopped.”
“What?” Marina asked with a puzzled look.
“When you asked me to take you to see your mother. I should’ve taken you.” Marina didn’t say anything. Obviously, his apology wasn’t enough. “I’m glad Maggie did, although I don’t know how you talked her into it. She’s usually one hard ass and more stubborn than me.”
Marina arched a brow. She looked at him for a moment then said, “I wouldn’t call you that. Arrogant and insensitive, yes, stubborn, no.”
“I’m not sure I like that any better.”
“Maggie is a Marine too, and she wasn’t as difficult as you.”
No, she’s not a Marine. Yet, she’s tough enough to be one. “Maybe she needs more training.” Kevin laughed hoping to ease the tension within Marina. “Are you going to tell me how you talked her into your little adventure up north?”
“I didn’t trick her if that is what you’re suggesting. We were talking about family. I told her about my mother and how she’s all I ever had. Maggie told me about her sister, a twin, that died and how terribly she misses her. When I said how I wish I could go to the grave one last time, she offered to take me.”
It was that simple. Two women bonded over their losses. Marina had a way of touching people’s hearts. If he wasn’t sure about that before, this proved it. I know you’ve touched mine.
By the way Marina held the urn, he knew it was important to her. That didn’t mean the risk hadn’t been too great and Maggie was foolish for even taking her.
“Marina, you could’ve been captured or killed.”
“I had to go. There was no choice. I needed . . .”
Southern Regions (Southern Desires Book 4) Page 11