I shove the pain back down deep inside where it belongs and speed away. I plan to return later in the dead of night to scope out the area and get a closer look at what I'm dealing with here. Then I can formulate a plan to exact my revenge and get justice for my parents.
I drive the rental back to Harrisville and park it in the lot of a twenty-four-hour big-box store, then walk the half mile to my motel. I shut myself inside and pace for a while to calm myself down. Going without sleep last night is beginning to catch up to me, and I need to be one hundred percent in case an opportunity to end this presents itself tonight. I strip and crawl into the bed, shifting around on the lumpy mattress until I'm somewhat comfortable, then focus on slowing my breathing and heart rate until I finally manage to drift off into a restless sleep.
When I wake again, darkness is already falling, and with a deep sense of purpose, I rise and get dressed. I gather my weapons together and sit at the pathetic little round table in my room, then carefully and methodically clean my gun, and sharpen my sword and knives. I stand when I'm finished and return the gun to its holster at my back and shove the knives into their sheaths in my boots again. I leave the sword on the table and go to stand in front of the mirror that's mounted above the room's shoddy looking particle board dresser. Then I stare at myself for several long moments.
Though my body reflects the powerful and self-possessed man I am today, in my eyes, I can still see that broken boy who had to become a man before he was ready. I still see the kid who had to learn to control his wolf without his father to show him the way, and somehow figured out how to survive by himself in a harsh and cruel world. Tonight, it would be all worth it. Tonight, I just might find the closure I've been seeking my entire adult life.
I nod to myself and gather my black leather trench coat off the back of the chair, then pull it on and lift the hood up over my head. I gather up my sword belt and slide my ninjato into its scabbard before carrying it to the door. I'm just about to grab the knob when a loud knock on the door startles me into utter stillness.
What the fuck?
I lean my sword against the nearby wall and reach back to pull my gun. Then I lean forward to look through the peephole and am shocked to see the last person on earth I ever expected to see again.
8
LYRIC
I feel eyes on me as I stare out at the thick forest outside the kitchen window of my parent's house. I barely register the bright midday sunshine reflecting off the brilliant crimson, gold, and fiery orange of the turning leaves. I came in here to get sodas to go with the lunch my brothers Emmett and Beck had gone to pick up for all of us, but got sidetracked by thoughts of a certain black-haired man with deep ocean blue eyes, who's been dominating my thoughts since last night.
"Is everything alright, Lyric?" my mother asks behind me. "You've been really quiet today."
I turn away from the granite counter top I've been standing in front of for quite some time now to find her coming up beside me. I shrug. "I'm just tired," I say, not really wanting to explain to her what happened with Ronan last night, and how much he's affected me ever since.
It was a busy morning moving all my things over to Wyatt and Harmony's place before we came back here for lunch. Between that and going out last night, and then all the dreams of a decidedly explicit and hot as hell nature that tormented my frustrated and unfulfilled body all night long, I didn't get a lot of sleep. So yeah, it's not a lie. I really am tired.
Her eyes narrow thoughtfully. "Are you having regrets?" she asks as she puts a comforting arm around my waist.
I catch myself before I let out a bitter laugh. Yeah, I'm having lots of regrets, just not about moving out of my childhood home like she thinks. No, my regrets are about something, or to be more accurate, someone else.
"No," I say. "I was ready, but I guess I'm feeling more bittersweet about it than I expected."
"That's normal, sweetie," she continues. "I feel the same way." She pulls me into a warm hug, and says with a tremble in her voice, "I'm going to miss you."
"Me too, Mom," I reply in a wavering voice as I hug her back fiercely. That's not a lie either.
"You have no idea how proud I am of you. You've grown up into such a strong young woman, and someday you'll find your own mate and have your own kids, and you'll understand exactly what I'm feeling right now."
And there's that regret again. I let my temper get the better of me last night, and now I fear I walked away from something I shouldn't have. Even though I know next to nothing about the man, I'm almost certain I didn't imagine the connection I felt with Ronan. What if walking away cost me my future mate?
"Mom?" I asked.
"Yes, sweetie?" she replies still hugging me tightly.
"How did you know Dad was your mate?"
She pulls away from our hug, and I see that same sweet and dreamy gleam in her eyes she always wears whenever she talks about Dad.
She puts her hand on her chest. "I just knew in my heart and in my soul that he was mine the instant we met. I felt this bone deep connection that drew me to him, and I couldn't stay away from him. I needed him. He was as necessary to me as breathing." She smiles softly. "He still is."
I hear soft footsteps behind us followed by a female voice saying, "Emmett likes to call it love at first sight on steroids."
I turn to see my brother's new mate walking across the kitchen toward us with her constant companion, Luna. The exuberant little Siberian Husky pads along behind her master with a big canine grin and her fluffy tail wagging happily. Raven is gorgeous with her hair cut into a sleek and shiny black bob that compliments her stunning electric blue eyes and flawless ivory complexion. It's been hard not to think of Ronan every time I've looked at her today due to their coincidentally similar hair and eye color.
Mom's smile turns amused as she glances at our newest pack member. "I'd say that's a pretty accurate description of how it feels."
"It was pretty terrifying when I didn't know what was happening to me," Raven adds, then snorts out a laugh. "Though after Emmett told me I was even more terrified, and I kind of freaked out."
By freaked out, she means she panicked and rejected him after he told her what he is and explained their mating bond to her. My brother was so distraught that he spent the next four days in the Wolcott Nature Preserve in his wolf form nursing his wounded heart. I can't help wondering how Ronan would've eventually reacted to the truth, if I hadn't rejected him myself last night. Luckily for Emmett and Raven, Mom and Dad stepped in, an option I didn't have, and helped get the two of them get back together again where they belonged.
Thank God they did too, since shockingly Raven wasn't the wild blood human, someone who carried trueborn blood from both parents without being able to shift, like they originally thought. No, she was a full-blooded trueborn who'd been adopted by her unsuspecting human parents as a baby. When her body attempted to come into its wolf as a teenager, it was mistakenly diagnosed as epilepsy. Somehow the medication she was given to stop the so-called seizures had trapped the wolf inside her for years until the mating bond with Emmett finally set her she-wolf free. Emmett helped her suffer through the change, and now she's a welcome and much-loved member of the pack after only meeting my brother a few weeks ago. The two of them are already living together like two peas in a pod, which just proves how deep the mating bond runs, and underscores the mistake I think I made last night.
I feel an empty pang of loss and despair fall over me, and finally open my mouth to tell them about last night. If any two people can help me, it's these two, the only mated females in our pack. I'm immediately interrupted before I can utter a damn thing as Luna suddenly yips in excitement. Raven and I turn our heads, our inhuman hearing catching the same sound that captured the dog's attention, the engine of a familiar vehicle pulling up the driveway out front. It's Emmett's old Jeep.
I decide to take this opportunity to chicken out since I'm half afraid they'll tell me what I felt for Ronan isn't the mating bond
at all, but a delusion on my part. Luna scrabbles out of the kitchen at a dead run, making Mom and Raven laugh. For some reason, the dog is obsessed with my brother and absolutely adores him. Emmett finds it annoying. I usually think it's hilarious, just not today. Today I can't seem to find humor in anything.
Instead of following Mom and Raven out to the dining room to greet my brother, I shuffle over to the refrigerator to grab the drinks I originally came in here for. I have my head in the fridge, gathering can after can of soda to serve when I catch a familiar scent nearby.
"Hey, Lyric," a low male voice announces behind me. "Need a hand?"
I straighten and turn to find Cooper Rollins, Emmett's best friend and Scarlett's younger brother, standing there smiling at me with warm brown eyes. Those eyes, along with his tall fit body, his wiry short dark-brown hair, and scruffy beard, give him a dark and dangerous quality that led to the years-long teenage crush I used to have on him. Back then, he didn't give me the time of day, but now from the way he's been looking at me the last few years, I'm pretty sure that crush has switched sides. He's never overt about it, but I can see the way he watches me with a decidedly male awareness that I don't think he realizes he's revealing to me. Thankfully, Emmett hasn't noticed, and I've been very careful not to send Cooper any mixed signals. We're just friends, and I'd hate to lead him on or be the cause of ruining his friendship with my brother.
"Here," I say as I return Cooper's smile and pile the sodas into his waiting hands. "And thank you," I add, then turn to reach back into the fridge for some more.
"So...um," Cooper says in a quiet and oddly hesitant tone. "I was thinking that maybe later, after you're all settled into your new place, that you and I could go to dinner and maybe catch a movie in Harrisville tonight."
Well, so much for not being overt.
I whirl to face him with what I'm sure is a wide-eyed and shocked expression. "I....I...um..." I stammer out while juggling sodas in my arms, not sure how to react to this completely unexpected turn of events.
He smiles indulgently and steps over to the counter to set the ones I already gave him down, and plucks the ones I'm about to drop out of my hands. He places those on the counter too, then shuts the refrigerator before stepping in close to me. I stand there dumbstruck as he reaches up to brush some of my hair away from my forehead and stares intently into my eyes. I can smell his rising desire as his eyes flash amber with his wolf, and while several years ago I would have been ecstatic about his sudden interest in me, now it just feels...wrong.
Anything I ever felt for Cooper isn't even in the same ball park as the feelings I have for Ronan. Cooper isn't the man I want. He's not Ronan. And that's the moment I realize exactly what a horrible mistake I made last night. All those feelings for their mate that Mom and Raven described? I feel them for Ronan, and having another man this close to me only makes that revelation even more starkly apparent to me. I need to try to rectify the situation with Ronan, if it's not already too late.
"I know you've had a crush on me for a while now," Cooper says with a wry twist of his lips. "I've felt the same, but you were too young and my best friend is your brother, but," -his eyes drop down to fix avidly on my lips as he gently cups my cheek in his hand- "you're not a kid anymore, and I can't keep pretending that I don't want to kiss you every time I'm near you." His face turns apologetic. "I'm sorry it took me this long to tell you," -he moves his lips closer to mine- "but I lo-"
"Whoa," I blurt out immediately, rudely interrupting Cooper's declaration as I duck out from beneath his arm and back away from him. Just the thought of kissing Cooper fills me with guilt. The only lips I want on me are Ronan's. "This...this isn't...I...I don't...I can't....I...I just..." I say in a panicked voice.
His eyes fill with confusion as he steps closer to me.
"No," I say as I raise my hands to ward him off and back into the counter behind me.
His confused expression instantly morphs into hurt at my vehement reaction.
"Lyric?" he asks as he stops a few feet away with a hand raised warily toward me.
"This can't happen, Cooper," I say. "This can't ever happen."
"Why not?" he asks. "Is it because of Emmett? Because he'll understand." He smiles again, soft and indulgently. "He has a mate of his own now too."
Too? Is that what Cooper thinks this is, that he and I have a mating bond? He couldn't be further from the truth. I used to think the same when my crush on Cooper was in full force, but when my feelings for him eventually faded with time, I knew that wasn't the case. And now, after meeting Ronan and feeling what I did during the short time we spent together, I know for sure. A crush doesn't hold a candle to the fiery passion of a true mating bond. Now I just have to make Cooper understand, and from the hopeful look in his eyes, he's going to take it very very badly.
"Cooper," I say as I shake my head. "This isn't a-" I begin, but cut myself off as my oldest brother Wyatt appears in the kitchen doorway, his hulking body filling up the door frame. He looks intimidating without even trying, with his fierce golden-brown eyes framed by short sable hair and a matching full beard.
"What are you guys doing?" he asks with a scowl in his usual deep and gruff voice. "Get your asses out here with those drinks, so we can eat."
No one can get hangry like my big brother. The man lives to eat, and right now I'm beyond grateful for it. Besides the fact that I don't want to hurt Cooper, this isn't the time or place to have this conversation anyway. This is going to require privacy and more time than we have right now. Well, that and I have no idea what to say that won't end up hurting him.
Wyatt's gaze sweeps between Cooper and me with furrowed brows. I can practically see the gears turning in my brother's head. He's no dummy. He can sense the tension in the room. His eyes narrow suspiciously and fix on Cooper. Did I mention how protective Wyatt is of his family, and especially his sisters?
"I'm on it," Cooper says as he immediately averts his eyes from my brother. He gives me a look that clearly says this isn't over, then gathers up some of the cans of soda still sitting on the counter and hurries away. Wyatt arches a brow as his hard eyes track Cooper's hasty exit from the kitchen.
"Everything alright?" Wyatt asks, still staring after Cooper.
"Yeah," I say, then turn away to grab the cans Cooper missed. I can feel Wyatt's eyes on me, probably waiting for a further explanation that I'm not going to give him.
Finally, Wyatt sighs in resignation, then says quietly, "Just let him down easy."
Surprised, I whirl at his unexpected comment with wide eyes.
He smirks. "I'm not blind and he's not that good of an actor, Lyric." His expression grows more serious. "The man's been mooning after you for a while now."
I nod in reply to his comment. "He's a good guy, but..." I trail off with a shrug.
"But he's not your mate," Wyatt finishes for me.
"Exactly," I agree, "but how do I tell him that without hurting him?"
"You can't," Wyatt answers, then takes the sodas from me and grins. "Come on, let's go eat."
I snort out a laugh as I follow him to the dining room. That's my brother, blunt and to the point. I'm half tempted to tell him about Ronan just so I can get his frank and unadulterated opinion about the situation, but I'm fairly sure he'll tell me what I already know. I need to go talk to Ronan again. I just need to get through the rest of the afternoon before I can sneak away tonight to do that. And as for the Cooper situation? Well, I plan on avoiding that like the plague. I can only handle one personal crisis at a time and as far as I'm concerned the longer I can put that one off the better.
9
LYRIC
The pure and utter relief I feel as I see Ronan's Mustang still sitting in the motel parking lot is profound. I don't know what I would have done if he'd already checked out and left. I didn't even know his last name to have an inkling of hope of finding him again. I pull in next to the dazzling electric blue muscle car, then put my older Ram Quad Cab in park and kill t
he engine. The huge silver pickup was a gift from Dad after he bought the latest model for himself a couple of years ago. I know I probably look ridiculous in the massive vehicle, but I love driving the thing. It always makes me feel like a badass, just like my father.
It's already dark outside since I wasn't able to get away until well after sunset. I spent the afternoon at my parent's house, hanging out with my family and actively avoiding being alone with Cooper like the plague, before going home with Harmony and Wyatt. Then I spent a few hours unpacking my room while I tried to figure out a handy excuse to leave again without having to explain where I was going. For some reason, I don't want to tell anyone about Ronan. Maybe it's because I'm ashamed of how I handled things last night. I don't want to have to confess my stupidity to anyone, especially if this situation is irreparable.
Hours later, when I still hadn't managed to come up with a single plausible thing to tell my two oldest siblings, the two of them invited me out for a hunt tonight and handed me the perfect opportunity. I turned them down, siting exhaustion as an excuse, and waited until they were long gone into the forest before taking off for Harrisville. Now I'm sitting outside Ronan's motel room with jittery nerves doing cartwheels inside my belly as I work up the nerve to go talk to him. What if I fucked things up so much that I really can't fix this? That thought has my she-wolf fluttering around inside me with anxiety.
I huff out a breath in exasperation with myself, like sitting here fretting and stewing is helping at all. Being a coward isn't the Weylin way. Dad always tells us that if we really want something, then we'd better well go after it with everything we have, and damn it, that's what I have to do. I steel my will and force myself to get out of the truck. I close the door and turn to head toward Ronan's door when the breeze shifts and the stink of sulfur trickles across my nose. I gasp softly as I freeze in my tracks. The scent of sulfur can only mean one thing. Demonborn. They're the unholy joining of man and demon by black magic into the vile shape-shifting abominations that wrongly call themselves werewolves and the sworn enemies of our kind.
Rogue Heart Page 6