by Annie Brewer
“I think it’s a “leopard” doesn’t change its spots.” I thought it sounded funny in my head. I just laugh it off, trying not to feel stupid. “Look who’s correcting who now.” I nudge her in the side and she giggles. “I’m really sorry my mom was asking questions. I can only imagine how you felt being in the spotlight like that.”
“It’s really okay. She didn’t know. I’m used to it, talking about them in the past. They are in the past now, I can’t keep dwelling on it.” My heart aches for her but she’s so strong. I admire her for that.
It’s a cold night, in the 50’s, but no snow yet. “So what do you want to do? We’re not supposed to meet up with Spencer until later.”
“I’m open. I don’t know this place so I wouldn’t have a clue.”
“I have an idea; let’s go to the Museum of Natural History. Interested?” She shakes her head, unenthused but she goes along with it. I always find it a good place to visit, so we go.
Chapter 53
Maddy
Lunch with Nancy wasn’t too bad. I was more nervous for Noah thany anything, but she doesn’t bite. I was a little blindsided when she asked about my parents, I’ll admit, but then again we’d just met and like most, that’s one of the first questions that’s asked in a situation like this. I didn’t get all emotional and storm out like I thought I would, I really did have to pee. Though I won’t lie, the woman was a little intimidating at first glance. But I’m reserving my judgment for later. She’s beautiful though, like her son.
I wasn’t too excited about the Museum when he suggested it; it’s just not my thing no matter where I go. But I didn’t want to insult him, so I went along with it. I never really liked History, but Noah seems passionate about it, which explains why he was studying to be a history teacher. I’ve learned that in a relationship, you don’t always do things to make yourself happy, you do things to make the other person happy and in turn, they’ll do the same for you. It makes sense to me. I did a lot to make Landon happy, but for him, it was take, take, take. Noah on the other hand, he gives me more than I’ve bargained for. It’s amazing when you find someone unexpectedly, when you weren’t looking.
Now we stand in front of the New York City library, the second largest library in the United States. The building is so old, but really well kept. Stepping into the building feels overwhelming and quite cold, so many books to gander.
“I’m…gonna look around.”
“Take your time, don’t get lost.” I wave my hand, finding his words ironic, considering a small town girl like me could get lost pretty easily. I guess there could be worse places to get lost in. I do love books, when I have the time to read them. I love the smell, the feel, the moment when you open it and the pages take you to another time, another place, away from reality.
It’s eerily quiet as I gaze from the floor, to the top of the ceiling and it’s flooded with books. “This place dates back to the 1800’s. They keep it well maintained. It’s also supposed to be the same library a scene from The Day After Tomorrow was filmed.”
“I remember that movie, and that scene. It does look like it.” I take a book off the shelf and sit on one of the comfy sofas, about the same time my phone goes off. “Shit.” I say too loudly. Noah glances down, when I pull my phone out to check the caller. “It’s my boss,” I hold it up for him to see and answer it. “Hey Amanda, what’s going on?” I whisper, walking away.
“I was just checking in on you. How’s it going in New York?”
“I’m at the city library, and have only been to a couple other places. We’re going on the tour bus tomorrow.” I glance at Noah, who’s casually looking down at the floor. “So far, it’s been great. We have lots to visit, so I’ll have a better update in the next day or two.” I smile at him when he looks up.
“Okay, be sure to take a lot of pictures. And you must see the tree at Rockefeller Center. Oh my god, so amazing.” Pictures, damn I have not taken any.
“Okay, I’ll definitely be doing that. I have to go because I’m really loud and my voice is echoing.” I whisper into the phone.
“Okay, have a blast Hun. Can’t wait to hear from you.” We hang up and I quickly scroll through my phone for my camera, waving my hand to Noah. “Come here, I need to take a lot of pictures.” He takes my phone, turns it around and snaps photos of us up-close. We do some silly ones, some serious ones, and a couple of us kissing.
When we get outside, we take more pictures in front of the building. I take pictures of the surrounding buildings and trees and anything I can see that’s interesting. I realize I didn’t bring my actual digital camera, stupid me. “Hey, I need to get to a gift shop later, sometime soon to get a camera. I only have my phone.”
“We can do that.” We walk around some more, and I’m thankful for my walking shoes and I’m not wearing my boots.
“Hey let’s get a hot dog, there’s a vendor not far from here. Well it’s in Manhattan, so we’ll have to get on a subway and then we can eat at Central Park.” I smile at the idea and my stomach growls at the thought of food. “Sounds perfect.” I tell him, skipping ahead.
We walk through the crowd. I keep wishing it would snow and I could run in it and play, throwing snowballs at Noah and roll around in it.
An hour later, we get our food and find a spot in the park on the ground and eat our lunch, almost in a picnic manner. I look around the streets, gazing at the small restaurants and shops around us, wondering how many people come through here every day. I could see myself living here, maybe. But growing up in a small town, it’s intimidating sitting here, wondering if you’re going to run into a mugger. I always heard there’s more crime in New York, but it could just be word of mouth, making it seem worse than it is. “Are we going to see where the World Trade Centers used to be?” I ask, in between bite fulls.
“Yep, it’s on the agenda for tomorrow, during the bus tour. It’s a hop-on, hop-off tour so we can get off as we please and get on another bus. There’s a lot for you to see, but some of the sights are fine to just pass by.”
“I’m so excited! Can you tell? Can you?” I’m practically bouncing around, while eating my hot dog and fries. He just laughs at me. “Is that what excited is supposed to look like?” I snicker at him as he reaches to grab my arm, I jerk away, out of his reach. “I would ask what you think of New York so far, but I’ll ask that question after you’ve seen everything else.”
“I like it so far. It’s better in person than seeing it on TV. And so busy, I can see why it’s called the “city that never sleeps”.”
“Yep, it definitely does make sense.” He stuffs his face and gathers his trash.
“Do you miss it here?” He looks at the ground, picking at leaves and sticks, avoiding eye contact. I can sense he’s struggling to answer. I touch his arm to get his attention, “Hey, it’s okay to answer me honestly.” He looks up at me, mustering a sincere smile, but it falls short.
“I do, sometimes I lie awake at night, thinking about my life here. Not that I’ve had any good memories, all my memories here are tainted with sad ones. I miss Spencer the most. But I love where I am,”
“It’s just not home.” I finish for him, totally getting where he’s going with this. I guess I’d feel the same way if the tables were turned. I move to sit close to him and he moves his legs out, gesturing for me to sit between them. His arms wrap around me like a cloak, pulling me back to his chest and I lay my head back against his shoulder. “I understand.” Our hands clasp together around my stomach.
“I love it there, and I don’t want you to think I’m not happy where I am. I’m just, I think being back here has brought new emotions to the surface and now I’m all melancholy and shit. I feel like a chick.” I slap his leg.
“Stop it, there’s nothing wrong with a guy getting in touch with his emotional side.”
“Maybe not if I was by myself, it wouldn’t be a big deal. But getting weepy in front of you makes me feel weak.” He rocks us side to side and I forget a
bout being cold. I could be naked and the minute his arms were around me, I’d feel like I was tangled in a heated blanket, and safe. I close my eyes, forgetting about the people around us and revel in his warmth. “I think after visiting with my mother, I just started wondering what it would have been like had she been there for me. Maybe I would have had a better childhood, worth remembering.” I know what that feels like. I knew what it was like for a short time before it all was snatched away.
“If you two have a chance, take it slow. You both deserve a second chance to have a normal, happy mother-son relationship.” I lean forward and turn my head to look at him. His eyes show sadness and it punches me in the chest, needing to comfort him. Before I have a chance to change the subject or the direction of the mood, his phone goes off. He reaches in, and answers it before looking at the caller. “Hey Spence,” My ears perk up and I wait, trying to hear the conversation. “Okay, we’ll see you soon. Okay, okay cool bye.” He taps my bottom and I lift up so he can get off the ground. He gathers his trash to throw away.
“So what’s the plan?”
“We’re meeting Spencer at our old hang out bar in about 30 minutes. We gotta catch the subway. Are you finished?” I stick the last fry in my mouth and nod, throwing my trash away.
As he walks off, I grab his arm and pull him to me. “Hey,” I look into his eyes, seriously, “It’s going to be okay. Things are going to work out. I have faith. Okay?”
He plays with my hand; a sliver of a smile lets me know that he believes me. “Okay, I’ll take your word for it.” He grabs the back of my neck, pulling my face close to his and then kisses me, still looking me in the eyes. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” I hug him before letting him go and leave the park.
“Yes, you guys made it. Now we can leave.”
“Wait, why are we leaving?” Noah asks Spencer, baffled. He leads us outside, “Kasey’s here, that’s why.”
I know that name sounds familiar; I wrack my brain for recognition of where I heard it. Andi doesn’t know anyone by that name. Wait-
“Isn’t that the girl you were talking on the phone to when we were in Best Buy, like months ago? You said she wouldn’t leave you alone or something?” Noah frowns, shaking his head. “So, let’s go in there. We’re all adults. I’m not scared of a little competition.” The guys follow behind me. “Please behave.” Noah whispers. I nod to appease him. I don’t start shit, but if she does, the claws will be out. Maybe. If I feel like getting in a fight.
“Relax; I’m not the fighting type.” People greet us, more accurately, Spencer and Noah. And they introduce me to the guys they’ve known for years. We sit near the pool tables. Spencer and Noah pay for a game, while I watch them. One of the guys sits next to me with a pitcher of beer; he holds his hand out, “Hi, I’m Shawn.” I glance at the beer, feeling thirsty.
“Hi, I’m Maddy. Noah’s girlfriend.”
He jerks his hand back, “What? Noah has a girlfriend? Holy shit.” I look at him, startled. “Sorry, it’s just that, Noah never did the girlfriend thing. He always just banged them and left them all sad and shit. How the fuck did you get him to settle down?” I sit stunned, glancing at Noah and Spencer ordering drinks at the bar.
“I’d prefer it if he told you. I don’t know what he wants revealed.”
“See that girl over there?” I follow his gaze, and see a girl, my age maybe, standing on the other side of the bar, watching me watching her. I nod. “She couldn’t get him to commit. See, they “dated” but he wouldn’t take it further. She even tried to move with him. I don’t know why he left her, I always wished for a chance with her. But then again, I’d rather just have fun with her.” He wiggles his brows suggestively. I find this guy creepy; I try to be subtle as I scoot away from him. My eyes find the girl again, who’s now checking out Noah at the bar. She’s wearing a skimpy dress with leggings and hooker boots. Her hair is long and dyed three colors. She is pretty, I’ll admit. I soon realize creep guy is still talking.
“Here’s some booze for the lady.” Spencer pours a glass and sets it down in front of me.
“Is that?” I point to the girl who’s gotten up and is now at the bar, talking to Noah.
He sees it too and sighs. “Yeah, don’t worry about her. She’s some crazy bitch that Noah should’ve never gotten involved with.” He turns his head, “Hey Noah, get over here and pay attention to your girlfriend.” He calls over his shoulder. My face flames in embarrassment. “Sorry, I’m not above and beyond calling him out on his shit.”
“I see that.” That’s why I love him. “It’s too bad you and Andi didn’t get closer. You two would be crazy awesome together.” A flicker of amusement flashes in his eyes, but it disappears just as quick.
“How is your friend doing?”
“Eh, not that great.” He sits down and we sip our beers.
“Sorry, I had to dodge her. She kept asking me questions. God, why can’t she leave me alone?”
“Parker! How the hell did you end up settling down? And how was it not with Kasey?” The creep shouts loudly, we all turn at the same time. I feel more insulted than anything.
“Morris, shut the fuck up. Kasey is a crazy bitch and Noah is happy so drop it.” Spencer comes to my defense and when I glance at him, he winks.
“Sorry babe.” Noah tells me, he turns to Spencer, “We should’ve gone to a place where no one knows us.”
“Yeah, I didn’t think of that. We could get some beer and go back to the house and play cards.”
“I like that idea.” I speak up. Noah reaches under the table and takes my hand. The curve of his mouth lifts into a grin. He mouths the three words that can send my pulse into overdrive every time he says them.
“Hi, I’m Kasey.” The girl approaches the table and holds her hand out. I stare at it, wondering if it’s a trick to butter me up before she pulls the rug from under me. Spencer and Noah share identical glances. Well this is awkward.
Do I shake it like a good girl? Or leave her hanging like a threatened, jealous girlfriend?
“Kasey, we don’t need any trouble here. Just leave.”
She glares at Noah, “I’m not starting trouble. I’m being polite.” She returns to me with a smile, a smug smile.
“Hi, I’m Maddy.” I take the highroad and shake her hand. My grip stays loose in her hold and I end it quickly. Shawn tries to get her attention but all her focus is on us. I squirm uncomfortably, wanting to leave now.
“It’s nice to meet you.” Her smile appears sincere. Noah’s grip in my other hand tightens a little. She looks at Noah, “I miss you. I hope we can catch up soon.” She walks away.
Noah and I look at each other, probably both wondering what the hell that was. And she misses him, really? She seems more obsessed.
“Okay, let’s finish our drinks and then go home.” Spencer suggests, and I’m on board.
“What about a game of pool?” Noah chimes in.
“Alright fine, one game.”
“I wanna play one too.” I finally say, changing my mood. I do like to play and we are here, so what the hell?
“Okay, who’s breaking?” Spencer asks us both.
Chapter 54
Noah
I should’ve known we’d run into Kasey at the bar. I didn’t want to make Maddy uncomfortable with the confrontation. Why can’t that woman take a hint? After all this time, she couldn’t find someone else to obsess over?
We played two games each before leaving. Maddy and I are both competitive at pool, which made our games interesting. But it was good fun too. And then there’s Spencer, the drunken shit talker. Tonight, he took it easy though, which made me happy. I didn’t want to have to deal with him puking on the subway.
Spencer brings out the games his parents keep in the hall closet. “So we have Uno or Phase 10, and some other card games that I don’t know how to play. Take your pick.” I’d rather chill on the couch and watch movies, personally but I let Maddy have first say.
> “I pick Uno, it’s fast and I want to get some sleep for our big day tomorrow.” Maddy points to the card games, gesturing for me to choose.
“I’m gonna hang out here for now. I might join in a bit.”
Sitting here on the couch, watching Spiderman, I can hear Maddy and Spencer carry on a conversation about their favorite TV shows and “hot” movie stars. And then my mind drifts off to our busy day ahead of us tomorrow. I’m anxious to take her to all the exciting sights. I know she’ll have a lot of fun. It’s New York, how can you not have fun?
I get off the couch, reach Maddy’s side and lean down to kiss the top of her head. “I’m going to bed, see ya in a bit.”
“I can come now if you want,” she sets her cards down and I shake my head. As much as I want her to come to bed with me, I want to give her and Spencer some time to hang out together. Both being the most important people in my life, they should have a great friendship.
“Don’t worry, you have some fun first. Kick Spencer’s ass in cards.” He jeers, sorting out his cards. I kiss her quickly, wishing Spencer a good night before leaving the room to start my bedtime routine.
I toss and turn, restless. I can’t place what has me so worked up but I can’t sleep. I can hear Maddy and Spencer’s laughter from beneath the door and before I can decide to join them, I shift to my right side. I have a lot on my mind and I can’t seem to shut it all off. But before long, I’m asleep.
Sometime in the middle of the night I feel something rest against my leg, startling me and I kick it away, not realizing its Maddy’s leg. She yelps, jerking us both upright but its dark and I can’t see her. “Maddy?”
“Mhmm.” She whimpers.
“Shit, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know you were there. You are really quiet getting into bed. Are you done playing cards for the night?”
“It’s 4:30 in the morning, babe. I’ve been asleep since after two.”