by Gia Riley
So much for going balls to the walls this year. I’m back in parent mode—right where I started. Maybe this is the person I was meant to be all along instead of trying to be someone I’m not. The real Kinsley West is responsible, hard-working, and determined. I need to find her again.
“Don’t worry about money, okay? I’m going over to the club. There are a couple positions there I think I can get. If I can’t, I’ll toss around my dad’s name until someone caves.”
“Did you forget you’re the Rhett Taylor? They’ll want you working for them.”
“Do you want me?” He asks, quickly.
I stare at him a second, trying to figure out where he’s going with this, but I don’t have a clue. “Of course I do.”
“That’s all that matters to me, Sunny. We’re going to get judged once everyone finds out, but I like the idea of just you, me and the baby. I want to stay like this for as long as we can.”
“I do, too, but I feel like everyone’s been staring at my stomach all day. Do I look different?”
“No, you look perfect. They don’t know anything. It just seems like they’re watching you because we’re protecting our secret.”
“I need to tell my sister the truth, Rhett. I can’t wait much longer. If she finds out from anyone but me, it will only make it worse for us.”
Rhett looks over his shoulder, making sure nobody can hear our conversation. That’s all we need, for someone like Mandi to hear about it. It would be all over school faster than I can blink. “We shouldn’t be talking about this here.”
“I know. I have to get going anyway.”
Rhett leans in for one more kiss before closing my door and resting his palm against the glass of my window. I match my palm up with his before reversing out of the parking space, and heading home.
The drive’s short, but by the time I get there, I already feel sick again. Hurrying up the stairs, I sigh in relief when I don’t have to stop to unlock the front door. I’m not sure I could have made it to the bathroom had I stopped.
My backpack falls to the cool tile floor, as I heave into the toilet. My ribs ache, and my headache returns instantly. I’ve never been so sick in my life. Even the flu has never been this bad. At least that comes in with a vengeance and goes away. This has the potential to linger for seven more months.
When there’s nothing left inside me, I flush the toilet, and use the sink for support as I try to stand up. I brush my teeth again, and splash cool water on my face. I’m exhausted.
I reach for the door but it opens on its own. Carson sticks his head inside. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I must have eaten something bad at lunch. Haven’t felt right all afternoon.” I expect him to buy my lie, but I’m still so nervous, I can’t even look him in the eye. This is what my life's turned into—one lie after another.
I move to leave the bathroom, but he blocks the doorway, not letting me through. He stares at me, his eyes raking over every inch of my body. “Tell me the truth, Kins.”
Instantly, I panic. He knows. But how? “I don’t know what you’re talking about, but I’m going to be late for work if you don’t move.”
“Then you’re going to be late because I’m not moving.”
“Carson, please. Betty is expecting me.”
“Tell me,” he pleads. “Just say the words.”
I push on his chest, begging him to move, but he only grabs my wrists and holds them so I can’t get away. “Stop it. Leave me alone!”
“Kinsley, I know. I found the box when I was taking out the trash.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Don’t lie to me, Kins.”
Tears prick my eyes, and no matter how hard I try to keep them inside of me, I can’t. “Let go of me.”
“It’s true. Isn’t it? You’re really pregnant.”
“Yes,” I whisper. As soon as he comprehends what I’m saying, he lets go of my wrist, and drops his head in defeat. He rests his head against the doorframe, and it’s clear how disappointed he is in me. But what he feels is nothing compared to the way I feel about myself.
“How could you let him touch you? Did you really think it would last? That he’s going to blow off college to stay home and take care of you?”
Each word out of his mouth stings more than the last. I want to scream at him, but I can’t. Not when there’s a good chance everything he’s saying is the truth. Rhett loves me, but he might love his future more. “Please, stop.”
He doesn’t. He only drills his point home harder, wrecking me completely. “Does Kate know? Wyatt’s going to lose his fucking mind. You realize this, right?”
“You can’t tell anyone, Carson. Please. Not yet.”
“I’ve waited an entire week for you to tell me about this. I’ve heard you throwing up, but I was praying like hell it was a virus and not because of a damn baby. You’re in so much trouble, but you don’t seem like you care.”
“I get it. I’m worried every single second of every single day. It’s all I think about.”
“How could you let this happen, Kins? How?”
“It was an accident. I didn’t ask for this to happen, Carson. I didn’t!”
“You messed up the second you let him touch you. You’ve been more worried about keeping Rhett Taylor happy than staying true to yourself. But let me tell you one thing, the thrill is over. He doesn’t want a kid or a needy girlfriend. He wants to go away to school and do whatever the hell he wants with whoever he thinks looks good that night.”
That’s not how Rhett operates. I know better, but hearing it from a guy who’s already in college scares me. “Shut up! You have no idea what you’re talking about. You don’t know what we have.”
“I know enough to know he’s going to run like hell the first chance he gets. He’s not going to take care of you the way I would have.”
And here we go again, more jealously. I thought we moved on from this, but apparently, we’ve been running in circles. “This isn’t about you, Carson.”
“You’re right, because everything always revolves around you. Everyone makes sacrifices for you while you do whatever you want. For someone with next to nothing you have a real sense of entitlement, Kins.”
I can’t believe he’s turning on me like this. He’s always been my friend—the guy I would turn to when I was down or needed someone to cheer me up. More than anyone, he knows how much pain I’ve dealt with. I didn’t ask to lose my parents. I didn’t ask to have my life ripped away from me, and I most definitely didn’t ask to be pregnant. “You moved in here on your own. Kate stayed here to take care of me because she wanted to. Not once have I asked for a single favor or thing from either of you. I can take care of myself.”
“You keep telling yourself that, Princess. I’m done. I’m done giving a shit about protecting you.” Carson storms off to his room, and throws his suitcase on the bed. He grabs handfuls of clothes out of his drawers and shoves them inside in a heap. Each item he tosses in, he throws a little harder. “I came here for you!” he shouts.
I slither around the corner of the hallway, watching in horror as he destroys his room, shattering picture frames, and upending anything that’s not attached to a wall or the floor. He’s allowed to be mad, but he can’t move out. We can’t afford to stay here without him. “Please, don’t leave,” I beg. “We need you.”
“Maybe that’s the problem with this arrangement. You need me, but I don’t need you, Kinsley. I could be living in some bachelor pad bringing girls home any night of the week—like a typical twenty-year-old guy.”
That’s not Carson. He’s never been a player and he’s never used girls to fill empty space in his life. “You don’t mean that.” He stares at me before reaching for the book on his desk and chucking it with all his might. I scream, ducking my head before it hits the wall next to me. “Are you crazy?”
For a minute he looks remorseful, like he realizes he’s out of control and needs to rein it in, but it d
oesn’t last long. Once he sees I’m okay, the anger replaces any trace of remorse he may have had. The Carson I cared about has already moved out, and I’m not about to stay here and listen to this one rip me to shreds again.
I turn around and run to the bathroom, grabbing my bag off the floor and tossing it on my shoulder.
He’s struggling to catch his breath after his temper tantrum when he asks, “Where are you going?”
I don’t respond, I just keep moving. I’m in my car and pulling out of the driveway by the time I see him standing on the stairs outside the apartment, watching as I drive away.
I’VE BEEN STARING at the same page in my trigonometry book for the last half hour. I’m trying to finish up my homework, so I can get to the diner to see Kinsley, but it’s not happening. Usually I’m pretty good at math, but my mind’s too wrapped up in the real world to care about the insignificant problems in front of me.
I’m about to give up when my phone buzzes with a text. I reach into my pocket, and pull out my phone, surprised to see the message is from Kinsley. She’s usually doesn’t message me unless she’s on her break.
Kinsley: Are your parents home?
Rhett: Not yet. Why?
Kinsley: Can I come over?
Rhett: Are you okay? Do you need me to pick you up at the diner?
I knew I shouldn’t have let her to go work. Not that I can stop her from doing what she wants to do, but she looked so pale and tired when I said good-bye to her at school. As adamant as she was about going to work, it doesn’t make sense why she wouldn’t be there now.
Kinsley: I’m in your driveway.
Seriously? Surprised she’s already here, I open the front door just as she’s getting out of her car. Right away, it’s clear she’s not okay. I wait until she’s standing on the porch before I ask, “What happened?”
She practically falls into my arms, and I pick her up, her legs automatically hooking around my waist. “Shhh. It’s okay.” Her shoulders shake as she cries into my shoulder. I have no idea why my girl is falling apart in my arms, and I’m almost too afraid to ask.
I hold her until I climb the stairs and lay her in the center of my bed. Pulling off her shoes, I slide her under the covers and climb in next to her. “Tell me what’s wrong, Sunny.”
Her chin quivers and tears roll down her cheeks. She can barely catch her breath to speak. “H-he knows, Rhett. Carson knows I’m pregnant.”
I swallow, trying to process what she’s telling me. He’s the last person I would trust with our secret. Mostly because he’s always wanted her to himself. And there’s no reason for him to protect her, especially if he’s still jealous she picked me over him. “Is he talking?”
“He’s really, really mad. I should have been more careful, but after I took the test, all I thought about was getting to the doctor to see if it was right. He’s known for a week, Rhett. An entire week.”
If he’s kept it a secret for a week, maybe there’s a chance he’s not going to say anything. Or maybe he’s going to use this as leverage to get back at me for stealing his girl—even though she never even knew he wanted her until she got with me. “Did he say anything else?”
“He said some really horrible things about the both of us. After he threw a book at me, I ran out and came here.”
“He hit you?” The thought of him hurting her makes me seethe. A rage like I’ve never felt rips through my body.
She shakes her head. “He hit the wall beside me.”
“That motherfucker.” I get out of bed, searching for my sneakers. “If he thinks he can control you with this, he has another thing coming. There’s no way he’s going to play games with my family.”
She wipes her tears with her fingers, swiping under each eye, quickly. “No, don’t go over there. It will only make it worse. He needs some time, that’s all.”
“You’re defending him?” It shouldn’t surprise me. The two of them have had some weird bond the entire time we’ve been together. It’s not easy for her to let people go, but Carson doesn’t deserve to stay in her life. Not after today.
“What he did was wrong, but he’s not like that. He wouldn’t hurt me—not on purpose.”
“You’re the most forgiving person I’ve ever met, Sunny.” I sit down on the edge of the bed, wondering what we’re going to do if he talks. I was sure we had more time to figure it out, but now it looks like we’ve run out before we’ve figured a single thing out one way or another.
“I’m more scared of Wyatt finding out. If Carson tells him, we’re done for.”
There’s no way that’s going to happen. “I told you, I’d risk it all for you, Sunny. I meant it. It’s you, me, and our baby now. I’m not going away to school next year. I can go to class here, like Carson does, and take care of you both. He’s done taking care of my girl.”
Her eyes widen in surprise. I wasn’t planning on dropping it on her this way. I was actually hoping to take her out to dinner and talk it through rationally, but desperate times call for desperate measure, and right now, all I care about is letting her know I’m hers. I’m not leaving her no matter what happens when the world finds out.
“You can’t do that. You’ll always regret it. I don’t want you to hate me someday because I ruined your dream.”
“What about your dreams? You want to go to Parsons just as bad as I wanted to play football. Why should you be expected to give it all up, and I get to move on like nothing ever happened?”
“You’ll regret it.”
“I’d regret it if I went. Not if I stayed, Sunny. You’re all I care about.”
I feel her phone vibrate against my leg. She rolls over and slides it out of her pocket. “It’s Carson.”
I reach for the phone, but she doesn’t let me have it. “Don’t make it worse than it already is. Please. I have to go back to that house.”
“I’ve never hated that you live with him more than I do now.”
“He was packing when I left. There’s a chance he’s already gone.”
“What’s he texting you?”
“He’s just apologizing.”
After she types out a response to Carson, that I don’t bother to read, I kiss her forehead and run my fingers over her stomach. All this stress can’t be good for them. We need some time away—just the two us like when we went to Fall Fest. I felt closer to her than ever that weekend, and I miss it. “My uncle has a cabin in the Poconos. We can stay there over break. Just me and you.”
Between Thanksgiving break coming up and winter break shortly after, we’ll need a place to go if we want to be together. Especially if everyone we know finds out. This could be the perfect solution.
“What do you mean? Like run away?”
“Think of it as taking a break—not running. I have a key, and nobody will bother us there. We can be us again. Without all this drama.”
She links her fingers with mine, bringing them to her lips. “I’ll go anywhere with you.”
Before I have a chance to tell her about the rest of my plans once we get there, my bedroom door whips open so hard I’m almost positive there’s a hole in the wall from the door knob.
My mom barges in, and takes one look at me and Kinsley in my bed, and narrows her eyes. “I trusted you, Rhett Mitchell Taylor.”
Whenever she busts out my full name, it’s never good. Today I know the reason is because of the baby. She knows.
She points her red fingernail at Kinsley. “You, out of my house! Now!”
Kinsley lets go of my hand, and scrambles to the side of the bed. “Mom! What are you doing? You can’t kick her out.”
“I most certainly can. This trash is not welcome in my home. Now when she’s sleeping around town like the little tramp she is.”
Is she kidding me right now? I’m the first guy who’s ever held her hand. The first guy Kinsley’s ever kissed, and her first date to a dance. I’m the only guy she’s ever shared her body with, and without a doubt we belong to each other in every way tha
t matters. “You’re wrong, Mom. I’m the only guy she’s ever touched.”
Mom scoffs, rolling her eyes at me. “You really expect me to believe that? Jake’s mom filed Kinsley’s medical records at the office this afternoon, and then made sure to give me a call. You can imagine what a shock it was to find out at work in front of all my co-workers that my son’s girlfriend is pregnant. Do you have any idea how embarrassing that was for me? How hard it will be for me to show my face around this town now?”
In typical fashion, she’s more worried about her own rep than the one of the girl she’s trying to ruin by making false accusations. “Your face? What about hers? Thanks to you people think she’s a slut.”
“I don’t sleep around,” Kinsley murmurs over and over, as she slides her feet into her shoes.
“You’re knocked up and now you’re trying to ruin my son’s life. My Rhett wouldn’t let that happen. I’ve let him live in his fantasy world with you for weeks now, but you’ve taken it too far. You will not blame this pregnancy on my son.”
I grab Kinsley before she can leave, standing behind her with my hands on her shoulders. “Mom, I love this girl. She’s carrying my baby.” I spell it out for her, really slow, hoping she can accept it as the truth. I’ve lied about stupid shit in my life, but I would never lie about creating a life with another person.
“How are you going to raise a child, Rhett? You have college next year. You’re going to play football while she’ll be in some run down trailer park with a baby on her hip.”
“Wherever she is, is where I’ll be,” I tell her with complete confidence. I already told Kinsley that was the plan.
“I don’t care if she lives in a damn box behind the grocery store. She’s screwed up her future, but I won’t let her touch yours, Rhett.”