CHAPTER 38
“Savvy, I’m tired,” Olivia complained. She placed her elbows on the teahouse table, propping her face with her hands.
Savvy stood above Simone’s baby carriage and lifted her into her arms. The baby had on a lavender baby layette with purple flowers. An oversized purple bow headband wrapped around her curly hair. Her tiny booted feet and mitted hands punched around. She cooed and focused her eyes on Savvy.
“Well, that’s the life of a new mother, you know? Have you and Malcolm figured out a good routine for the two of you?” Savvy settled into her chair with Simone and took a sip of her cinnamon tea.
“Well, that’s the problem. You would think after three months, we would’ve found a routine that works for both of us. The problem is, when Simone cries, we both wake up. It’s hard to go back to sleep. Both of us are extremely tired the next day. It isn’t any good for him or me.”
“Wow, I never thought about that.”
“Yeah, me either. I think I have a solution though.” Olivia took a bite of her blueberry muffin. “We need to rotate with one of us sleeping in the guest bedroom. When Simone cries, Malcolm can go feed and change her and not wake me up. We’ll switch responsibility each night. One of us has got to get sleep to function each day.”
“Do you mean you would sleep in separate beds in different rooms?” Savvy asked.
“Exactly.”
“I don’t know, Olivia. I mean, your idea is an interesting approach, yet, I don’t think you should get in the habit of sleeping apart from each other all of the time,” Savvy explained.
“It’s only until she can sleep through the night. It’s not like we ever feel like doing the nasty anyway. I can’t stand for him to touch me since I’m still nursing Simone. He thinks these Ta-Tas are for him, which is out of the question.” Olivia pointed to her breasts. “Oh, and by the way, after I wean Simone off, I will definitely be getting a breast job. These things will hang like Snoopy’s nose the way they’ll sag.”
“You’re too funny.” Simone stirred in Savvy’s arms and drifted to sleep.
“But I’m serious, though. Malcolm is already saying he wants to have another one right away. I’m barely getting some of this weight off now. Nursing is helping me to get rid of it fast. I’ve been working out twice a day to rush the process.” Olivia patted her stomach. “Having a baby ruins your body and men don’t seem to understand. I’m serious about getting my boobs done.”
“Well, don’t go overboard with the workouts, Olivia. Plus, you don’t need to do anything to your breasts. You can’t tell you recently delivered a baby. You’re already smaller than me and I haven’t had any. Don’t forget your previous addiction to exercise. Remember what you learned when you were in treatment for your eating disorder years ago,” Savvy reminded her.
“You don’t forget a thing, do you?” Olivia asked in disbelief. “Don’t worry, I’m eating healthy and I’m not working out like I did when I had my problem. I still go to my quarterly eating disorder meetings, so I’m good. I feel like I’m being chastised by my mama.” Olivia rolled her eyes.
“Great. We’re not going down that road again. Do you hear me?” Savvy shook her finger at Olivia and rocked Simone in her arms.
Olivia answered, “Yes ma’am. I want to make sure Malcolm doesn’t start looking at any of these women who are more fit and trim than me. I have to get my body back in shape quickly. You know how men are.”
“You have a good man, Olivia. I don’t think you have to worry about him,” Savvy reassured her.
“Yeah, you’re right. I think I would be more likely to cheat on him way before he would even think about doing that to me. He definitely isn’t that kind of guy,” Olivia agreed. “My biggest issue is, he should get another job to help out with our bills.”
“Tell me what’s going on. You’ve been complaining about Malcolm needing a different job since before the wedding. Are you still paying for everything? Please tell me you are not.” Savvy said.
“He’s still binge shopping for sports paraphernalia. I foot the bills with my money. He won’t even use his own to buy diapers for the baby,” Olivia exclaimed.
“Why are you still even saying mine and his? You two are married, and you shouldn’t be territorial about that,” Savvy scolded Olivia.
“This is a big problem. Not to mention, he can’t seem to do anything right with Simone. I write out a checklist of things for him to do with her, and he never finishes the list. The way he holds her and plays with her, makes me cringe every time he picks her up. He acts like she’s a football. He’s too rough with her.”
“I’ve seen the way Malcolm picks Simone up, and there’s nothing wrong with how he holds her. Do you seriously write out a checklist for him and expect him to follow it to the letter?”
Words began to rapidly shoot out of Olivia’s mouth. Her nose flared with frustration and she balled her hands into fists. “Yes. If I didn’t, he wouldn’t know what to do. He can’t even put a diaper on straight, Savvy.”
“Hey. Hey. Calm down. Where’s all this nonsense coming from? You’re trippin’ right now, and making mountains out of molehills. I think you need to stop and realize Malcolm is doing the best he can with Simone. Don’t forget, he’s new at parenthood, too. Can I get you to stop and breathe?” Savvy put a hand on Olivia’s shoulder.
Olivia took several deep, cleansing breaths in and out. She closed her eyes until she became calm. She opened them and became overcome with sadness. “Savvy, I’m a horrible wife and mom. I don’t want to be all alone in raising Simone.”
“Stop expecting Malcolm to be perfect. You’re doing a much better job than you think you are, and you’re not alone. He’ll help if you let him. I know it can’t be easy right now. You’re not a bad wife or mom. I think you two need to sit together, pray for guidance, and have a conversation about what you need from each other.”
“I hear ya girl. I hear ya.” Olivia sighed. “There’s something else I need to tell you, though.”
Savvy stared at Olivia waiting through her pause.
“I’m actually pregnant again. I didn’t want this right now.” Olivia wrung her hands in her lap.
“Already? Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure. I started acting absent-minded and my stomach has been unusually upset. When I missed my period, I bought a pregnancy test not thinking it would be positive. Well, it was. You know I called my doctor immediately without even telling Malcolm. I made a visit to her and she confirmed it.” Olivia fought back tears.
“That’s wonderful. You two don’t waste any time. The kids will be close to each other in age and can be best friends. It’s not going to be bad like you think it will be. Stop making this sound like doom and gloom.”
“You don’t understand, Savvy. My body is still out of shape from Simone. I’m furious with myself for giving in to Malcolm one night and having sex with him. The one time we got busy doing the do since I gave birth, and we have another baby on the way.”
“Well, that explains your rollercoaster emotions. Your hormones are all out of whack, not to mention, you haven’t been having enough sex to relax your nerves. You better realize this new Turnipseed growing inside of you is another blessing.”
“But what about me? It’s my body getting all stretched out, not Malcolm’s. It’s my life dominated by diapers, burp cloths, spit-up, crying, feedings, and sore arms. It’s me, not him. All he does is stick it in me and I’m the one who suffers for nine months. He gets to keep on having fun. I’m the one who can’t have a drink. I’m the one who gets fatter and fatter. It’s me and no one cares about me Savvy.” Olivia frantically spilled out her frustrations and tears fell from her eyes.
“Olivia, stop it. You’re not doing you, or the baby, any good with this stress. Breathe right now. In and out slowly.” Savvy took small breaths, hoping to get Olivia to follow suit.
Olivia followed Savvy’s instructions again and finally calmed down. She grabbed a napkin off the tabl
e to wipe the tears from her face.
“Look, I know you’re worried about the money, however, you’re doing better than most with your practice. I think you two should meet with the financial advisor I recommended. They can help y’all develop a budget and make smart investments for your kid’s future. Also, I think you should seek out counseling at church. It wouldn’t hurt to get help from someone with credentials after their name who can advise you on this situation. There are some things both of you need to lay out on the table before it’s too late,” Savvy suggested.
“Once again you say exactly what I need to hear. I always feel better after we talk. You make me see things differently. I’m going to suggest these ideas to Malcolm and figure out what we can do. At the rate I’m going, I’ll destroy our marriage if I don’t get a grip.”
“You can do this Olivia. Anything is possible if you stop being anxious about everything and talk with God instead. Trust me, He will answer, and He will take care of you. You believe me, right?” Savvy asked.
“Yes, I do believe you, and I have to get back to going to church. I need to be reminded to leave my problems at the altar,” Olivia said.
“Good. I’m glad you recognize God’s grace. Oh, my goodness. I didn’t realize what time it is. Girl, I better get out of here. I actually have a date tonight with the cutie pie I told you about.” Savvy finished her cup of tea and stood to place Simone back in the carriage.
“Oh yes. You better get going, and you must give me the juicy details tomorrow. Thanks again for listening to my problems. Go have yourself a good time. I love you, Savvy.” Olivia hugged her tightly.
Savvy hugged her back, “I love you more, Olivia. Now go home to your husband. You two can figure this stuff out. And by the way, give your man some booty.”
PART 5
HOLD UP
CHAPTER 39
2011
“Come on kids. Hurry up and get in the car. We don’t want to be late for your swimming lessons,” Olivia yelled from the garage.
“Mom, I can’t find my goggles,” Simone whined.
“They should’ve been in your cubby by the back door. Go back in and look again,” Olivia sighed with frustration. They went through this every week and it was beyond frustrating how they could never get out of the house on time. “Tell your brother to get out here. Now.”
“He’s still on the computer,” Simone tattled.
“What? Tell him I said, don’t make me come in there and snatch him out,” Olivia shouted.
“Christian. Mom said to get your butt out here,” Simone yelled from the doorway.
“Stop saying the word butt, Simone,” Olivia scolded. “If you both aren’t in the car in one minute, we’re not going.”
Both of them came running out of the house.
“I wasn’t on the computer.” Christian jumped into the backseat.
“Yes, you were,” Simone replied and buckled her seatbelt.
Olivia glanced in the rearview mirror and saw him ball his little fists up as he yelled, “No, I wasn’t.”
“Were too,” Simone replied to irritate him.
“Stop it. Both of you. That’s enough,” Olivia snapped at them and backed out the garage. “Next time, we won’t go if you aren’t ready on time. Understand?”
“Yes,” the kids said in unison.
Olivia took a deep breath. Malcolm needed to be taking the kids to these expensive swim lessons. She always ended up driving them while he was out golfing. She was tired of playing chauffer while he got to chill.
Fifteen minutes later, Olivia rushed the kids into the gym. After talking with some of the other parents, she found a spot on the bleachers to watch Christian and Simone swim.
“Hey, Mom,” Christian yelled while balancing carefully on the diving board. “Watch me jump. Are you lookin’?”
“Yes, baby. I see you,” Olivia replied enthusiastically. She smiled, her anger at them earlier, dissipating. She was happy to see how well they were doing in swim class and couldn’t believe that Malcolm thought they were a waste of time.
Christian bounced on the board slightly and gracefully dove into the water. He surfaced quickly with a smile on his face. “Did you see me, Mom?”
“Great job, honey,” Olivia cheered and stuck her thumb in the air. “Beautiful dive. You are awesome.”
Christian swam to the edge of the pool to join Simone and the other kids listening to the swim instructor. Olivia’s mind floated away to thinking about her crazy existence.
Life became a whirlwind eight years ago with Christian August Turnipseed’s entrance into the world. Like Simone, he also had mahogany-colored skin, and a head full of jet black, curly hair.
Although neither child turned out golden-skinned like Malcolm, Olivia loved their complexion. She finally came to terms with her issues about being dark-skinned. Her children were beautiful and it wasn’t just her who thought so. They often got stopped in public by strangers commenting on their beauty.
Her parents and sister never bothered to travel to San Antonio to see the kids. After all these years, Malcolm hadn’t met her family. He suggested planning a family vacation to visit them, however, out of spite, Olivia refused once her mother made excuses for not coming to help her after Simone’s birth.
Although disappointed, she made the decision to stop wasting time trying to force a bond between her parents and children. Olivia figured her mother would be unhappy to see they were dark-skinned. She didn’t know how she would react if her mother said one negative word about her kids.
Olivia made a vow to herself to never treat her children the way her parents treated her. She showered them with love in every way possible. She made sure the kids had exposure to every type of activity possible to keep them competitive with others. Simone took gymnastics, swimming, basketball, tennis and piano lessons. Christian excelled in karate, swimming, soccer, tennis, golf, and played the drums. Malcolm loved bragging on his “well-rounded” kids, even though he could never be bothered to take them to lessons.
Olivia wished Malcolm would spend more time with the children. He showed more interest in watching college and professional sports versus throwing a football around with Christian in their backyard or attending any of the kid’s games. Olivia grew weary of making excuses to the children whenever they questioned why their daddy never showed for games or performances.
It’s pathetic I had to be the one to teach our son how to catch a football instead of Malcolm. Why am I always going to the games by myself or with other parents?
Any time Olivia raised this subject with Malcolm, he shrugged it off and told her to stop making a big deal about it. How could she not make a big deal? He just didn’t get it.
Ten years of marriage had passed. On the surface, they had the kind of life many longed for. They had four cars, an exquisite home in an upscale neighborhood, high society friends, and memberships in exclusive clubs. Rubbing shoulders with the rich and famous had been Olivia’s dream. Now, it had become her perfect reality.
Socially, they attended many “see and be seen” events in town. Olivia had a designated closet packed full of designer gowns for the various black-tie affairs and galas they attended.
A local magazine featured Olivia as a Rising Star in the community. As a well-known, sought-after psychologist, she’d received awards and recognition from a variety of organizations.
Her rapidly growing practice led her to acquire another office. She hired eight additional practitioners to manage the increase in patient load.
She continued her program for women who were dealing with eating disorders and self-image issues. Helping others avoid what she experienced for many years, became her life passion.
Despite having a crazy schedule with the kids, she and Malcolm were enjoying the benefits of being a wealthy family in San Antonio due to her success.
In the meantime, behind the scenes, Malcolm didn’t accomplish much with his network marketing. It seemed to be every other year, he switched t
o another company to chase a rabbit into another dreadful hole.
Olivia had morphed into being a constant nag about Malcolm’s shortcomings when it came to his financial contributions to their marriage. And over the years, his spending habits still hadn’t improved.
They argued constantly about the bills, and it often ended with Malcolm storming out of the house or Olivia closing herself off in the bedroom. They were fine financially due to Olivia’s practice, yet, she became frustrated with the fact her paychecks paid for everything instead of his.
Olivia snapped out of her deep thoughts when she realized the kids were no longer in the water. She made her way down to the locker rooms and waited for the kids to exit. Children swarmed around looking for their parents. The noise from their excited chatter filled the room.
Simone skipped out of the girls’ room with her braids still soaking wet and dripping on her clothes.
“Mom. Did you see me float on my back?” Simone’s eyes were wide with excitement.
“I’m proud of you. You’ve come a long way, baby.” Olivia hoped her face didn’t give away the fact she didn’t notice Simone floating.
Christian ran out from the boys’ room with another kid Olivia recognized from previous weeks.
“Hey, Mom,” Christian exclaimed. “This is Jeremy. Can he come over and play Super Mario with me on my Nintendo? Please?” The boys jumped around in excitement.
“Hi, Jeremy. Nice to see you,” Olivia spotted his mother and waved across the room. “Today won’t work, but let’s see about next week. We can even stop out for pizza afterward if your mother says it’s okay.”
“Cool,” the boys said in unison. They high-fived and Jeremy ran off.
“All right, we gotta go kids. We need to grab lunch before I drop you guys off. I have my hair appointment in a little bit and I don’t want to be late.” Olivia hurried the kids to the car.
“I get to sit in the front,” Simone yelled.
“No, you don’t. It’s my turn,” Christian shouted and pushed Simone away from the front door.
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