“No! No. Can you please just drive and leave my...life to me?” His normally olive complexion was just a hint darker and he was definitely squirming in his seat.
Nanna’s words about not questioning him came back and I gritted my teeth to hold in the next barrage of questions. I figured I could live without knowing everything about Owen, even if it was juicy gossip Tonya would kill for.
“Fine. Spoil sport. What did you do for Christmas?”
“Nothing much.” He gave a one-shoulder shrug, and when he smiled, I knew I’d managed to stop before putting my foot in my mouth. “Worked a bit at the hotel and hung out at the library.”
“Sounds exciting. Read anything interesting?” The library was the last place I was interested in going.
“Just the entire collection of The Walking Dead.” His smile grew to a full-blown grin.
“Oh, my God! You’re joking, right?” My entire body jerked upright. “I’ve been saving my money to buy it online. How did I not know they had that?”
“Maybe if you’d ever actually been to the library you’d have seen it.”
“Can I borrow it?”
“It’s at the library, Phoebe. I would hope you understand the basic workings of the place even if you’ve never been inside.”
“Shut up,” I said, rolling my eyes and turning the radio up to drown out any more possible digs.
By the time we got to Nadine’s place, cars already lined the street. I pulled around to the next block and parked under a street light. The first few houses were dark so I figured I’d gotten lucky and the owners had gone out.
Owen’s cell rang as we climbed out of the car and he glanced at the caller id. “It’s my dad. I better take it.”
“Want me to wait?” I shifted from one foot to the other, hoping he’d say no. I wanted to see Nathan, even though I wasn’t sure what I planned to say, or more importantly, what I wanted him to say to me. That he was dying of love for me and had made the biggest mistake of his life dating Vivian would be a nice start.
“Nah, go ahead.” Owen waved me on and answered his call.
Walking down the street, I glanced nervously behind me. It was silly really, being afraid of the dark. Owen was somewhere back there in the darkness. Besides, we lived in a small suburb of San Diego, not downtown LA. Of course, that hadn’t stopped my dad from doing the best possible job of instilling a fear of dark streets into my heart with tales of murder, rape, and robbery.
Seeing no one else around, I wrapped my arms around myself and walked faster, wishing I hadn’t been too vain to bring a coat. Despite the warm days we’d been having, the evenings still cooled down considerably and goose bumps covered my exposed arms. I rounded the corner and the thumping sound of music and people reached me. Even before reaching the door, I could see the windows vibrating in sync with the boom of the bass. I entered the house and a wave of human heat bombarded me.
Winding my way through the crowd, I searched for someone I’d actually want to talk to. It wasn’t that I didn’t like the other kids at school, but I just figured why waste time talking to them, because we obviously had nothing in common, otherwise we’d be friends. I guessed they didn’t take offense, because most of them never tried to talk to me either. My little group of friends was enough. Anymore than the three of them, four if I counted Karin, and I’d be too distracted. Nathan, of course, would be a complete and totally necessary exception to that, mainly because he already was a distraction.
I spotted Nathan leaning against the banister talking to his best friend Andrew. Our eyes met as I passed by and winked at him, just to see the color flood his cheeks. He was almost too easy to embarrass. Andrew gave him a knowing nudge and Nathan broke eye contact. The temptation to stop and talk was there, but I resisted. Leaving him behind, a smile stretched across my face.
Tonya sidled up to me. She wore a short black skirt and sparkly blue tank top, making me feel a bit underdressed in my skinny jeans and retro tee shirt, but I was probably a lot more comfortable.
“What are you so happy about?” she asked me.
“Nothing.”
“Weren’t you driving Owen?” She glanced behind me in search for him.
“Yeah. He got a call when we arrived, so I left him back at the car.” I grabbed a pretzel stick from a bowl on a nearby table and started to suck all the salt off of it.
“I almost wish Karin was here to see you come with him. She would totally flip, then she’d be all over him.”
“Well, don’t tease him about it. I tried that earlier, and he wasn’t impressed.”
“You mean he was actually awake to hear what you said? That boy is so freakin’ strange.”
“Sometimes I think he just chooses what he’s aware of,” I said, trying to defend him, even if it was a feeble attempt.
“My point exactly. Freakin’ strange. He’s just lucky that he’s pretty to look at or I’d kick him out of our little circle.”
“We have a circle? And Owen’s pretty to look at?” I tried to hold back my laugh, and instead it came out as a strangled snort.
“I just made our little circle,” she said, flipping her hair over her shoulder before she joined me in laughing. “And yes, Owen’s hot. If you weren’t completely obsessed with Nathan you might actually notice these things.”
Owen was hot? I looked back into the living room, trying to spot him, finally finding him still near the entrance. He was taller than most of the people, and yeah, I could see how someone would be attracted. He had that lean body type that maybe hid some muscles underneath. Hot, but not my type. Now Nathan, I could see his muscles. I’d been fantasizing all day about touching those muscles. Waves of shivers ran through me and I forced him from my mind.
“Sooo? Where’s this Trevor?” I asked, tired of talking about Owen. He wasn’t really an interesting topic.
“Getting us drinks,” she said, motioning to the kitchen. “God, Phoebs, I really think I’m in love.”
I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. “He’s that wonderful, huh?”
“You have no clue. He’s amazing! There he is,” she gushed, pointing out a tall guy with a deep brown complexion and short dreads. I could definitely see why she’d fallen for him. Three letters were all that was needed to describe him. H-O-T.
“He’s definitely cute,” I said when she looked at me with her eyebrows raised.
Grabbing my arm, she tugged me through the room toward him, and once we reached him, she dropped my arm in order to twine her fingers through his. When he turned his attention to her, she practically glowed. She was way more into him than any of the other guys she’d dated.
“Trevor, this is my best friend Phoebe.”
“Hi,” I said, and gave a weird hand wave.
“Hey,” he said, bobbing his head while he curved an arm around Tonya’s shoulders.
There was an awkward lull as we took each other in, maybe in some kind of attempt to see what Tonya saw in the other.
“So, you live in San Diego?” I asked when I couldn’t stand it anymore.
“Yeah.” Head bobbed again.
Great, a real conversationalist. Tonya stared up at him with adoration and I had to suppress a chuckle. She obviously didn’t care about his ability to carry on a conversation. Not that I blamed her. He was gorgeous. Dark creamy skin, piercing brown eyes, broad shoulders. Hell, I could appreciate a gorgeous guy even if there wasn’t a brain attached.
“Trevor’s going to UCSD next fall,” Tonya said like a proud mama.
“Really? What’s your major gonna be?” I asked.
“Law.”
My stomach cramped and I waited for the whisper, but nothing came, or at least nothing I could hear over the music. Maybe it was just my period.
“You okay, Phoebs?” Tonya ducked out from under Trevor’s arm and stepped closer to me.
“Yeah, just not feeling well all of a sudden. I’ll be fine in a minute.”
“Why don’t we find a spot to sit?” She started
to guide me to the kitchen, but Trevor grasped her arm.
“She’ll be fine. Let’s dance.” He didn’t look at me, just gazed hard at Tonya.
“But-” She glanced back and forth between us.
“I came here to be with you. I didn’t drive almost an hour to sit in a kitchen.” Trevor dropped her arm then took a step closer. “If you want to spend the night with your friend, I can find someone else to be with.”
Wow. I didn’t even know what to say. Apparently, Tonya didn’t either, because we both just stared at him.
“I’m gonna get another drink.” He headed to a table at the back of the room where a beer keg had been set up.
“What the hell’s his problem?” I asked, rubbing a hand across my stomach as the cramps eased.
Tonya glared at me. “Nothing’s his problem. He’s disappointed that he can’t be alone with me. That’s what boyfriends want.”
“Whatever,” I said. “I’m gonna go sit.”
I wasn’t really expecting her to follow me, but it still kind of hurt that she left me pretty eagerly to join Trevor on the sofa where he was working on a beer. Instead of staying in the kitchen, I wandered through and went out the back door. The yard was dark except for where the indoor lights filtered through the windows and the moon glinted off the dark water of the swimming pool. I sat on one of the pool lounge chairs and rubbed my hands along my arms.
What did the cramps mean? Was it a warning? It could have been just a false alarm. It wasn’t like before, when the whisper followed the cramps.
“You have a serious problem, you know.” Nathan’s voice came from right beside my ear. I swirled around to see him crouched beside me, thoughts of my gift completely vanishing as I met his stormy eyes.
“A problem?” Did my voice just quiver? I swear he got hotter each day.
“Yeah, you’re a terrible flirt.” He smiled and I couldn’t help myself. I smiled back and leaned in closer to him, inhaling deeply. He smelled amazing, like the ocean, or at least what the ocean should smell like. Fresh and cool, with a breeze that sent tingles up your arms. I didn’t know what cologne it was, but damn, it was worth whatever he paid for it.
“Am I really that bad at it?” I asked.
He straightened up and came around to sit in the chair beside mine.
“Oh, I wouldn’t say you’re bad at it. I’d just say you’re bad.”
Heat filled my cheeks, yet he looked entirely unfazed.
“How do you do that?” I asked.
“What?”
“Anytime someone else is around, you blush like a little girl, but the second we’re alone you have no shame.”
He laughed. “I guess it’s the same way you have no shame in public, but the second we’re alone you blush like a little girl.”
I pursed my lips in a failed attempt to stop a smile from forming.
He raised a knee to rest his arm on. “So, why are you out here? Normally, you’re joined at the hip to Tonya or Bianca.”
I shrugged a shoulder. “Bianca isn’t here and Tonya’s got a new boyfriend, and apparently he doesn’t want to share her.”
“Ah, so you’re sulking.”
“I am not sulking. I wasn’t feeling well, so I came out for some fresh air.”
He leaned his head back, looking up at the sky. He had one of those strong profiles that should only belong in marble. A year ago, he’d been a bit on the scrawny side, but now, well, I was pretty sure he hid a six-pack under his shirt.
His lips curled up; he knew I was staring. Even knowing that he was aware of my gaze, I didn’t take my eyes off him. When he was surrounded by his friends, there always seemed to be a part of him hiding, yet here alone with me, he was relaxed, like he was the real Nathan.
“Enjoying the view?” Chloe’s voice came from behind us.
“Yes, and you’re interrupting,” I snapped and then swatted at Nathan when he gave a laugh. Both of us turned to watch her walk across the patio.
“I need to talk to you. It’s important.” She raised her eyebrows and motioned her head to the corner of the yard. She crossed her arms and I knew refusing was pointless. She’d just keep bugging me.
I pushed up out of the chair and followed her to a far corner of the yard. I turned back to see Nathan watching me. I blew him a kiss and gave a small wave. He just shook his head and looked back up at the stars.
“Have you ever considered that Nathan just doesn’t take you seriously?” Chloe asked and slapped my hand down.
“Maybe, but it’s a hell of a lot better than him not thinking about me at all.” I gave her my full attention. “You said it was important, is this it?”
“How are you getting home tonight?”
“I’m driving,” I said, confusion drawing my eyebrows low.
“Are you taking Tonya?”
“No, she came with her boyfriend, Trevor. Why? What’s this about?” I watched as she shifted her weight back and forth on her feet.
“I saw you in your car and Tonya was beside you right before it crashed.” Her voice trembled and I wondered how detailed her vision of the accident had been. A strong stomach never had been her strong point.
“Shit. You sure?”
Her head tilted to the side as she raised an eyebrow. “I saw it, Phoebs.”
“Yeah, well, you saw a few other things that never happened, didn’t you?”
“This isn’t a joke. You know how right these visions are.”
“Again, you’re batting zero with me lately.” Maybe it was a lame attempt at brushing her off, but if she was right then there was absolutely nothing I could do about it anyways, so worrying wasn’t worth the effort. We’d both learned that changing her visions wasn’t possible.
“So what? Two mistakes out of millions I’ve had? “Her voice shook.
Obviously, the vision had scared the crap out of her. I just didn’t know what to do or say. Maybe she was wrong about this. I wanted to brush it off again, but her pale face gave me pause. Taking a deep breath, I said the only thing I could.
“I promise not to give a ride to Tonya.”
“Will you go home now? I’ll follow you back.” She crossed her arms, rubbing them slightly as if she could brush away the vision she’d had.
“Chloe, I’m not going to leave early.” I looked back at Nathan where he sat pretending not to be watching us.
“Come on, Phoebs, it’s not like this thing with you and Nathan ever seems to go anywhere,” she said, letting the snarky sister I knew loose.
“That’s not what you said a few weeks ago. You told me you had a vision of him asking me out.”
Her mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water. She knew if she admitted she’d been wrong then that it was possible she was wrong now. She’d always known her visions were the future, now I had her wondering if they really were.
“Stop worrying.” I gave her a half hug then deserted her. I had better things to do, namely Nathan, than go home with Chloe because of some vision..
Walking across the yard, I went straight back to him while Chloe stomped back inside. I needed to get my thoughts focused and off Chloe’s vision. If she was right about her gift, that it was always right, then there was nothing to do. I slid onto my chair and gazed up at the stars, not really wanting to talk. Just being near Nathan was enough to get my body humming.
Finally, when my racing thoughts settled, I turned to him. His eyes were closed and I thought for a moment he was asleep, until a devilish smile bore dimples into his cheeks.
“You’re staring again,” he said so softly I almost didn’t hear it over the music carrying out to us from the house.
“Are you complaining?”
“No... -Maybe.” He sighed. “I just never know where I stand with you.”
“What do you mean?” I sat up and swung my legs over the side to face him.
“You play hot and cold, Phoebe. One minute you’re practically panting over me and the next you’re insulting me.” His eyes glanced
off mine before focusing on the stars above us.
I tried to think of something witty to say, to make it easy between us again. I didn’t want him to know why I teased him. When he’d taken Vivian to that dance and then spent the next year dating her, I’d tried to salvage some dignity. That day in the art room when I asked him to Homecoming, I had thrown myself at him, kissing him and he’d rejected me. Because he thought Vivian was better. After that, I figured it was just better to make him think it was all a big joke, that I didn’t take it seriously and he shouldn’t either.
“Forget it,” he said when my silence continued.
“What do you want me to say?” I snapped. “How about I don’t know where I stand with you. When you first moved here, I did everything I could to show I liked you. I kissed you and asked you out and what did you do? You started dating Vivian. Vivian. That pretty much said it all. Vivian and I are about as different as a dog and a...an elephant.” I stood up, too angry to care that he could probably see up my nose. “What did you want me to do? Pine over you? Pout and cry every time I saw you kiss her or hold her hand. Excuse me for wanting to puke instead. Vivian. I mean the least you could have done was have some good taste.”
He rose up from the chair to stand toe to toe with me. I crossed my arms over my chest.
“There’s nothing wrong with Vivian.”
“Really? Then why break up with her? I’m surprised you had the balls to do it. You’ve spent the last year letting her tell you what to do. She probably even told you when to kiss her.”
“Gee, who else does that remind me of?” He looked pointedly at me.
“Yeah, well that’s not a mistake I’ll make again.” I suddenly regretted starting this whole argument.
“Well, maybe that’s why I broke up with her and maybe it’s why I never bothered to go out with you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Hurt was pulsing through my chest. Why the hell did I even like this guy? He obviously didn’t like me.
“It means that I don’t like being chased around and maybe if you hadn’t come on so strong last year I would have asked you to the dance myself.”
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