“Don’t go, please.” His eyes close against the possibility of me denying him.
“I was going to come back,” I whisper.
Mason breathes in slowly, then out just as carefully before speaking. “You were?”
“Yes.” I hold my breath, silently begging him not to ask me why. I don’t know if I can answer that question coherently.
My fingers tighten around the pajama bottoms just as Mason releases his hold on them. His hands fall away, but he hesitates a moment before turning back. I watch him walk to his dresser. When he is intent on finding another pair of pajamas, I quickly wriggle out of my jeans and tug on the pj bottoms.
I want to turn around, for just a minute, but fear keeps me rooted to the floor. Blocking out the sound of him undressing is impossible. I could describe every movement. My breathing stops entirely when I hear him pull on the pajama bottoms and take a step toward me. Even knowing he is coming, I still jump when his hand touches my shoulder.
“Why are you just standing here?” he whispers.
My whole body floods scarlet. I cannot even express how grateful I am that this room is dark. Any answer I could give would sound completely idiotic. So I don’t say anything. I turn away and head to the bed, dropping onto it graceless and awkward. I just want to pull the blankets over my head, but when I reach for them and find nothing, I remember the tangled heap on the floor.
A second later, Mason settles a light blanket around my shoulders. His hand lingers. The recollection of how to breathe escapes me entirely. The way his fingers slide down my arm sends a shiver through my body. The ability to breath returns, but now I can’t seem to stop breathing! My chest pumps in and out at a manic pace.
The mattress shifts as Mason’s weight distorts the surface. I feel absolutely paralyzed as he lies down next to me. His hand still rests tentatively on my shoulder, his body keeping its distance. The air in the room freezes. Sound melts away. All either of us can hear is my breathing, rapid and frantic.
“Are you okay?” Mason asks worriedly.
Am I okay? I wonder. Am I losing it completely? How many times have I ended up in bed with Mason over the years? Dozens, but this is different. This isn’t just two friends talking or comforting each other. I can’t lie next to him without wanting more. When did this happen? Does it matter? Do I want it to be any different?
“Ollie, are you okay?”
No, I don’t want it to be any different. That admission slows everything back down.
“Yes,” I say, finally gaining control of my breathing. “I’m fine.”
Reaching up for Mason’s hand on my shoulder, I pull it around me. Never one to waste an opportunity, Mason scoots in closer. For the second time tonight, I fall asleep in Mason’s arms.
Chapter 18
Traitorous Jeans
(Olivia)
Waking up feels like trying to peel wallpaper off the wall. My eyes simply refuse to open when the morning sunlight attacks me from the window. Why are the curtains open, anyway? I always close them at night ever since I caught our neighbor, Timothy Dugger, staring at me one day. Intent on getting up, closing the curtains, and falling back into bed, I finally force my eyes open. The sight of navy blue curtains, instead of the deep purple ones in my room that block out light so well, freezes thought and movement alike.
The reason for why I’m so tired comes back to me when I realize my arm is draped across Mason’s chest. Even better, my head is on his shoulder with his arm around me and my leg is crossed over his, putting my knee in a very delicate place.
My first thought is to close my eyes and pretend I’m still asleep. My second, more realistic thought, is that if someone finds me in here, we are both going to be grounded for the rest of our lives. Self-preservation beats out self-indulgence. It kills me to do it, but I wriggle out of Mason’s arms and make a break for the hallway.
I feel like I just ran a marathon as I pull the door closed behind me. My eyes dart up and down the hallway. It’s a miracle that it’s empty at this time of day. Usually everyone is scurrying around getting ready for work and school. I’m halfway down the stairs before I remember Dad is out of town until late tonight. That takes care of one person.
One look at the old pendulum clock hanging in the hallway tells me it’s barely six in the morning. That takes care of Evie, who never crawls out of bed a minute before she has to. Mom is always up at the crack of dawn, so it’s not surprising when I stumble into the kitchen and am welcomed by eggs and pancakes.
“You’re up early,” she says with a smile.
“Long night,” I grumble.
Mom puts an arm around my shoulder. “Mason’s nightmares again?” When I nod, she frowns. “I really wish you’d come and get one of us. You shouldn’t have to deal with that every time.”
I nearly choke on my orange juice at her suggestion. She looks over at me curiously. “It’s fine,” I say after a coughing fit. “I don’t mind handling it.”
If she has the same doubts Dad does about Mason and I—which apparently are well grounded—she doesn’t express them. She only smiles and goes back to flipping pancakes. Fifteen blessedly quiet minutes later, Evie ruins the moment when she plops into the chair next to me, looking like she rolled down the stairs.
I doubt I look much better, though, so I save any snappy comments for later. If only my dear sister would be so kind.
“Are those Mason’s pants?” she asks through sleepy eyes.
The spatula Mom was just holding clatters to the pan. She picks it back up quickly, but I can tell from the tension in her shoulders that she’s listening very closely.
“I borrowed them. So what?” I ask, glaring at Evie.
“Why? They’re way too big.”
“I couldn’t find mine.”
Evie looks over at me, no longer half asleep. “Not a single pair?”
As a smile creeps onto her face, I have no doubt her big mouth is about to get me in serious trouble. So I run. I push away from the table and my half-eaten breakfast, all but running for the stairs. I am cursing Evie as I grab for the bathroom door knob. One quick twist and the hope of a few minutes alone evaporates at the sight of Mason.
Standing in the middle of the bathroom with nothing but a towel around his waist, one hand on the door knob as if he were in the middle of opening it, he stares at me looking as caught off guard as I feel.
“Mason, I . . . I’m sorry, I . . . ”
Red as a cherry tomato, I turn for the door. Mason is faster, pushing it closed before I can escape. I spin around as if caught in a trap. My heart rate spikes at the sight of him only inches away from me. I stumble back against the counter.
“You were gone when I woke up,” Mason says softly.
I try to say something, I do. I can’t stop hyperventilating long enough to form an actual word. My fingers begin strangling the lip of the counter out of fear that I might faint. I don’t know what to do when Mason’s hands slide over my cheeks. His fingertips brush my eyelids, closing them with a feather touch. His breath washes over my skin softly. Slowly, my own breathing calms to match his.
“Why did you leave?” he asks.
“Someone might have seen me.” Do I really have to explain that? Dad would freak out!
Mason’s fingers slide up over my cheeks to nestle in my hair, opening my eyes as they go. The smile on his face is like nothing I have ever seen on him before. Mischievous, eager . . . my breathing stutters . . . sexy and full of desire.
“So what if they saw you. Blame it on my nightmares. No one would doubt you, and it wouldn’t be a lie,” Mason says as he closes a little more of the distance between us.
“They would doubt if they saw how we were laying,” I mutter.
Mason’s hearing is too good to miss it. His lips curve up a little more and I add devilish to the list. “You’re the only one that can see me. To anyone else it would just look like you were sprawled out awkwardly.”
I try not to admit he’s right, but I can’t lie to mys
elf. No one would have realized. I panicked and ran. That’s why I really left.
“Mason, I don’t know what’s happening,” I say in a moment of complete honesty.
His grin turns suddenly serious. “What do you think is happening?”
My mouth opens. It closes. My eyes close, just to pretend for a moment this isn’t happening. I open them again and truly see Mason. Not only is he absolutely gorgeous, he is the best friend I have always treasured, the companion I want to share my life with, the one person I would trust with every secret, my first and last thought, the man I am undeniably in love with.
“You’re not my brother,” I whisper.
Mason’s entire being lights up. “I’m so glad you finally realized that.”
He leans in before I can think to do anything at all, crushing his lips against mine, spilling out love and passion like I have never experienced. My hands reach up to his neck, pulling him to me hungrily. Mason groans and yanks me away from the counter to press against his chest. His lips drink mine in as if he needs me to live. My body sinks against his in complete surrender.
Thought completely disappears from my mind until the bathroom door cracks into the back of my head. “Olivia,” Evie snaps, “why are you standing right in front of the door?”
Her eyes widen as she stares at us . . . well, at me. I must look completely crazy with my arms seemingly sticking out strangely, pressed up against an invisible wall. I hastily yank myself away from Mason, but the damage is already done. Evie’s hand slaps over her mouth.
“Are you freaking kidding me?” She laughs and reaches out a hand to locate Mason. She isn’t disappointed. “This is so awesome! Dad’s totally going to kill you both, though.”
“Shut up, Evie,” I snap. Spinning away from her, I shove the door against her.
Mason grabs my arm before I can escape. “Your jeans are still in my room. I didn’t think to grab them before.”
I’m thankful for the warning, knowing that if Mom tries to straighten up and finds them in there, we’ll have to face a whole slew of inquisition-like questions.
“No!” Evie says with bulging eyes.
It’s only then that both Mason and I realize Evie was still touching his arm and heard what he just said. Mason shakes her off and runs his hands through his hair in frustration. Furious at Evie, I snap, “That’s not what happened.”
“Sure,” Evie drawls.
“It’s not,” Mason says evenly.
“Don’t say a word about this,” I say to them both. Red with embarrassment, I slam the door behind me and go off in search of my traitorous jeans.
Chapter 19
Quietly, Painfully
(Mason)
It’s a good thing we only live half a mile from the school, because after Olivia took off without either of us, I dreaded the idea of asking for a ride. After Olivia’s blow up, I have no doubt her mom has a pretty good idea about what happened. Olivia’s dad is not going to be happy when he gets home tonight.
As Evie stalks along behind me, it’s hard not to be pissed at her. I know it wasn’t her fault. I should have locked the door, for one, but I can’t help tossing away my anger when I think of how excited she was at the idea of Olivia and I being together. It was the reaction I wanted from Olivia, but now I’m afraid it’s been jeopardized.
Evie and I part ways without a word when we reach the school grounds. She heads for Aaron while I go in search of Olivia. Her obsessive nature leads me to her locker. My palms immediately turn sweaty as I spot her. She pushes the locker closed and leans her head against it.
My body responds immediately, carrying me toward her. I only get within five feet before she senses my presence and looks up. The deer-in-the-headlights look she sports stops me cold. I don’t know what to do when she turns and bolts for her first class.
I want to run after her, talk to her, something! Falling back against the locker, I force myself to take a deep breath and think.
Of course Olivia is freaking out! Before Dad brought up living arrangements after high school, Olivia had never looked at me as more than her brother. Romance, kissing, sex, those had never before crossed her mind. It kills me to admit it, but kissing her may not have been the best plan. What was I thinking?
Banging my head against the locker, the sound draws a few strange looks, but I ignore them. I need someone to tell me what to do. Should I back off, let her process the fact that I’m in love with her? Will she freak out again if I hold her hand or try to get close? I don’t know what to do!
A scuffle in the middle of the hall draws my attention, even more so when Robin pops back up to her feet after probably tripping on something. Her bright red glasses draw my gaze and I freeze. She’s the only other one who can see and hear me, but how do I talk to her about this? I’m not as blind as Olivia. Robin clearly has feelings for me. I have no idea what to do about that either. I like her, a lot, but I’m in love with Olivia.
I am on the verge of ditching school entirely and taking a mental health day, but Robin catches sight of me first and ping pongs off the other students milling in the hallway to reach me. This is the first time her grin doesn’t rub off on me.
“I kissed Olivia!” I blurt out, independent of thought.
Robin blinks. Her eyes widen. The delicate arch of her eyebrows flies up. Her lips part as she stares at me. “Uh, what?”
“I kissed her.” My breathing takes a vacation, leaving me staring at Robin like a fish.
Robin closes her mouth and fiddles with her glasses. “Okay.” She breathes out slowly. “How did Olivia react?”
“Uh, great, at first.” I drag my hands down my face wanting to shake myself violently. “Until Evie walked in on us and figured out what was going on. That’s when Olivia freaked out, took off without us, and now she practically ran away from me.”
Covering her mouth with her hand as she thinks, Robin looks like she trying not to laugh. “So, it could have gone better, then?”
The final bell blares through the hall saving me from having to say anything in response. This was a mistake. I turn toward the outer doors. Robin snatches at my hand and refuses to let me go.
“Uh-uh,” she says. “You’re coming to class with me.”
I could break free if I wanted to, but I let Robin drag me down the hall to her first class. As soon as she drops into her seat and releases my hand, I slide down the wall to the floor and hang my head. I want to stay here for the rest of the day. Robin nudges me with her shoe. I ignore her. So, she kicks me, hard enough to make me yelp.
Glaring up at her, she glares right back and points to one of the two notebooks on her desk. I groan. Talking about this was a really, really stupid plan. Still, Robin won’t give up. She gets me in the shin with the next kick and I pull myself up off the ground so I can see whatever she wrote.
Look, I know you’re in love with Olivia. That was pretty obvious the second we met, but it’s also been pretty obvious that she thinks of you as her brother. What were you thinking kissing her?
“It wasn’t like that,” I argue. “She’s been different the last few weeks. I knew the way she thought about me was starting to change. Then last night, we got in this fight after she found out I went with you to your grandma’s. She was mad at me for lying, but I thought she was more jealous than anything.”
Was she?
“That was definitely part of it, but she was pretty mad about the lying, too.” I sit on the top of an empty desk in front of Robin feeling exhausted. “Anyway, we worked it out and we ended up falling asleep on my bed.”
Robin peers up at me with a quizzical expression. I roll my eyes at her. “Nothing happened. If it had, I probably would have blurted out that I had sex with Olivia rather than that I kissed her if it had.”
Nodding, Robin looks back down at her notebook and writes, Okay, no sex, but something obviously happened.
“I had another nightmare. Olivia was kidnapped. It was pretty bad and Olivia had to wake me up. I though
t she’d leave after that, but . . . ”
She didn’t?
I shake my head. She didn’t even want to. She wanted to stay with me.
You spent the night together? Robin asks.
Nodding, I continue. “When I woke up, though, she was gone. I took a shower, but when I went to leave, Olivia walked in on me and it just happened.” I scrub my hands through my hair and look at the ceiling.
For a long time, Robin doesn’t write anything else. I look down, thinking perhaps she is taking real notes, but her pencil sits between her fingers unmoving. When my eyes travel up to her face, her expression makes me want to kick myself. The quiver in her chin is faint, but it’s only accentuated by the way her bottom lip is being held between her teeth. She blinks her eyes rapidly. I am such a jerk.
“Robin,” I say, reaching down and covering her hand with mine. The touch seems to startle her and she looks up with a tortured expression. What was I thinking?
Standing, I let my hand slide away from hers. “Robin, I’m so sorry. I know you don’t want to hear any of this.”
I turn to leave but Robin sticks her leg out in front of me. I could just step over her, but I look back. Her notebook is tilted up so I can see it.
SIT! DOWN!
My face screws up in confusion. She taps the same message and glares at the seat in front of her. Not sure what I’m doing, I sit back down on the edge of the desk. Her pencil starts flying over the paper.
I can’t do this through notes. I have a free period next. Do. Not. Go. Anywhere!
For some reason, I listen to her. The last thing I want to do is hurt Robin. It was an idiot thing to do going to her with this problem in the first place. I can’t figure out why she’s so intent on making me stick close by, but her intensity pushes me to do as she says. I slink down in the empty seat and try to focus on the lecture, on anything other than Robin and Olivia.
The ring of the bell startles me nearly right out of my chair half an hour later. I stumble to my feet. Before I can take a step, I feel Robin’s grip latch onto my hand. She’s not letting me get away. Once again, I am drug through the halls to the parking lot. Robin yanks me over to an empty bench and unloads her stuff on ground.
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