I touched my mouth and failed to feel the points of my fangs. My finger slid across the top row of my teeth and when I discovered them reverted to their duller state, my eyes widened. My senses were normal, not as sharp as they had been no more than a few moments ago. My lungs filled and a laugh of wonder floated past my lips. I was human once more.
I turned my head to regard the woman. Lydia. Her face brightened when we made eye contact and I could not help but mirror her grin. Lydia threw her arms around me and I wrapped her tight in mine. “Oh Peter,” she said. “My heart’s broken so many times for you.”
Clutching her against me, I shut my eyes. My fingers threaded through her hair and I could not help but to be lost in wonder. “Lydia,” I said, laughing once more. I pulled away to look at her, cupping her face in my hands. “Is it truly you?”
She nodded, tears dancing in her eyes as she laughed. “It’s me.” One tear escaped her eyes and ran down her cheek. She reached up to swipe it away, and then rested her hand atop one of mine. “It’s really me.”
“Oh, thank heavens.” Without waiting for permission, I pulled her close and kissed her in a deep, lingering manner, allowing myself to get wrapped up in the moment. Our lips touched a few times before Lydia broke away and chuckled. I grinned, resting my forehead against hers. “This has been one long, horrible nightmare I have been stuck living.”
“I wish it was.” She sniffled. Her eyes opened to regard me. “I’d like very much to tell you that it’s all been a dream, but I’d only be lying to you.”
I nodded, pulling her close once more. “I am sorry I doubted you when you tried to warn me. I wish I could go back in time and force myself to believe you, but I cannot.” My fingers combed through her hair, and I drew a deep breath inward. “How in the heavens do you wish to be close to me right now after all of the things I have done?”
“What matters is that you believe now.” She pulled away from me again. “I’m just glad to be able to see you. Even if it’s only for a short visit.”
A glassy haze obstructed my line of sight as my eyes met hers. “My sins are too great for me to linger with you in heaven. It might have been the monster, but I was a participant nonetheless.” I sighed. “I understand and had expected as such.”
A smile broke out on Lydia’s face. “No, Peter,” she said, visibly holding back a laugh. “You’re not dead. Well, not dead again, anyway.”
I blinked. “How did I survive? I could have sworn Sabrina . . . ”
“Got you through the chest?” Lydia nodded. “But not through your heart, so you are pretty badly hurt. You’re just resting at the moment and I needed to talk to you.” Her grin turned coy. “Now that you’ll actually listen to me again.”
I nodded. A frown tugged at the corners of my mouth as I looked away. “I had hoped it to be over, to be perfectly honest.” My eyelids drifted shut. “God, I would have preferred eternal damnation to waking as a vampire again, if there is such a thing as hell.”
Lydia touched my cheek, forcing my eyes open again. “You’re right about having a lot to make up for, and your job isn’t finished. If I could, I’d sneak you off with me, but I don’t have a say in the matter. You have other places to go. Other challenges to face. A long road ahead of you.”
“A long road wrestling with the demon.”
She nodded. “I’m sorry, but it’s true.” Pausing, she considered me for a moment. The look in her eyes turned deliberate. “You have to listen to me, though. There’re a lot of things waiting for you. I’ve brought you this far, but I can’t help you with what lies ahead. You’ll need to rely on Monica and your wits to carry you the rest of the way.” I detected a hint of sadness in the way she regarded me. “I wish I’d been there to see you through it.”
“You have, Lydia.” My grin broadened. “Far more than you realize.”
She smiled. “Then my work here is done.”
Nodding, I raised a hand to touch her hair one final time before dropping my arm back to my side. “When shall I see you again?” I asked.
“Not until you reach the other side.”
I drew a deep breath inward. “Then let your lips be the last which call me Peter. Flynn has much to atone for and such shall be his task now, until my days on Earth are finished.”
Lydia sighed. “I don’t envy your position, but I admire your strength.” She leaned forward and a soft kiss touched my forehead. “I wish you blessings on your journey, Peter, as well as the hope that you can endure the challenges you’ll have to face. I can’t tell you more than what I’ve already said, but don’t count ‘Peter’ out just yet.” She nodded. “I’m leaving you to Monica’s care now. Take care of yourself.”
“I shall do my best.” My eyes shut as I pressed my lips to hers again, allowing the moment to linger as many seconds as The Fates would allow until the world around me shifted. I felt myself being swept away as though a leaf upon the wind.
Without further warning, consciousness returned to claim my immortal form.
***
Pain. The first thing I became aware of the moment lucidity began trickling toward me again. Darkness was the second thing I noticed. The lights in the room had been turned off once more.
I grimaced despite myself. “Bloody broken body,” I murmured. “Put me out of my misery, Monica. I am no use to you anymore.”
She chuckled, but it sounded weak, as though she could manage nothing more than that. “We’re both a mess,” she said. “You’ve been stabbed so many times, I’ve lost count, and I’ve been bitten twice. And I just had to shoo away a bunch of vampires thinking I was fair game.”
“How did you manage that?” Opening my eyes, I verified I was still resting on the floor of the common area, where I had fallen. I touched my chest and winced. The slowly healing wound yet seeped blood. Sabrina had missed my heart only by a hair’s breadth.
Monica stumbled over to me and sat where I could see her. I had no desire to attempt standing, so I remained flat on my back. “I have a few tricks up my sleeve,” she said as she moved my hand away. I watched her study my wounds. “Have I ever told you that you’re a lucky son of a bitch? Because you are, Peter.”
I frowned. “Please let that be the last time you call me that.”
Monica’s eyes met mine again. “The last time I call you a lucky son of a bitch?”
“No. Peter.” I closed my eyes and sighed. “He yet resides within me, but so long as I possess this body, I shall always be Flynn. And I shall always have too many things to atone for before I reach the other side.”
“You can’t look at this as atonement.” She raised an eyebrow. “You’ll bury yourself in a rut as deep as your guilt and never come out. It’s what you were born to do, plain and simple.”
“Regardless, I shall petition for redemption until I exist no longer.”
“Fair enough, I guess.” Her gaze softened. “You had me worried for a minute there, you know. I didn’t think you were acting.”
“I wish I could say it was all an act, but then I would be lying.” I finally motioned to sit. The effort laborious, I felt overwhelmed with dizziness and hunger at first, but managed to suppress both in favor of looking toward Monica again. “There is much work to be done. This much I know. Lydia visited me for what she said will be the final time and informed me there are trials lying ahead. Perhaps, if I make it through, The Fates can at least rend me in half and have mercy on Peter. Until then, it would appear you are stuck with this conscience-laden immortal, watcher.”
“Have a little faith. Like you said, we have a lot of work left to do.” Monica nodded. “I understand, though. Even if calling you Flynn all the time’ll take some getting used to.”
I smiled wanly, as did Monica. She reached forward, patting my shoulder. “For what it’s worth,” she said, “At least you beat Sabrina. That’s a very good start.”
I nodded, furrowing my brow as a strange thought entered my mind. “Monica, how was Sabrina able to get her hands on you
in the first place?” I asked. “I thought you cast a protection spell.”
Monica’s smile turned timid. “I lied.”
“You . . . ” I shook my head. “What do you mean you lied?”
“I mean exactly what I said. I let myself get captured, so you’d finally have to confront Sabrina. The Council wouldn’t have been able to tell us shit. They told me the next time they saw me I’d have a lot of explaining to do, so I wasn’t going to count on them to help us. This was the only resolution I could think of.”
I blinked. “Monica, how could you do something so bloody quixotic? You nearly met your end because of it.”
Monica patted one of my hands, while struggling to a stand. “I had faith in you.” She took her first precarious step forward, and then motioned for me to follow. I rose to my feet as well, collecting my katana and Lydia’s pendant before making my way to the back exit with her. “I knew the seer would win out in the end. Even if he scared the shit out of his watcher.”
“Do not ever do that again, or I swear I shall strangle you myself.” She laughed and we walked, side by side, out of the coven of my rebirth for what I assumed would be the last time. I had no desire to return and finish the others; they might have been lazy and decadent, but they were not evil. No doubt there might be a day I would face the unruly ones, I thought to myself, but I had a lot to recover from and many lessons left to learn before then.
After all, I had a prize in my sights. Pleasing the Fates enough to merit some way free from the curse of being a vampire, or earning my rest somehow. I wanted it so much I could taste it.
And I felt it worth all the pleading in the world.
“There is no person so severely punished,
as those who subject themselves to the
whip of their own remorse.”
Seneca
Epilogue
“So, you have finally come to speak to us about this vampire named Flynn,” the man said from his position on the other side of the room. The area itself the sanctuary of an old church, it came replete with seven chairs poised where the altar used to be. Six elders from the Supernatural Order occupied seats. One chair remained empty, as it had for five years.
I was absent from the meeting, situated on the other side of the stained glass windows. Using Monica’s eyes to witness the events, I filled in the remaining details with my ears and smoked a cigarette in an effort to mask my apprehension.
Monica regarded each elder and inhaled deeply. “Yes, I have, Richard,” she said to the man with salt and pepper hair who had addressed her. Her voice cracked, though she recovered quickly and worked to regain her confidence. I could envision her, however. Shuffling her feet. Looking down at the floor before lifting her gaze to regard her superiors. “I know I’ve angered the Council with my actions as of late, but I have news I hope will justify my actions.”
“Speak the news,” said a female seated a few chairs down.
Monica directed her attention toward her. “The vampire covens of this city have been quieted by Flynn. He’s realized his position as a seer and put out several fires they started. One of the vampires he killed was his maker. It was difficult for him to accomplish, but the fact that he was able to do it shows how far he’s come.”
“What of Peter Dawes?” the woman asked in response. “Why does the seer continue to use his other name?”
“Because he feels the need to. It’s a complicated issue, Joan, but I promise the Council the Flynn they’ve known has been suppressed.”
“Suppressed?”
Monica sighed. “So long as I’m his watcher and he’s under my guidance, I’ll do what I can to ensure his conscience remains steady. He’s already come a long way toward holding his instincts at bay for good.”
“But he’s not at that stage yet?”
“He’s still a vampire and a fledgling seer. That makes his condition unsteady, but given the time, he’d”
“So he might strike at humans again?” asked another elder, seated closer to Richard. A blond-haired man. He raised an eyebrow at her.
Monica held up her hand. “Please, Lewis, I ask the Council to give him a chance. Any of us have the potential to become wicked. Granted, I know, in Flynn’s case, it’s much more volatile, but he wants to learn more about being a seer. He’s been an attentive student and faced all the unique challenges of what he is with determination. His dependency on blood has diminished. He doesn’t feed on live hosts and I”
“Show us your neck, then.”
Monica turned to look at the only other female, a brunette. “I beg your pardon, Beverly?”
Beverly leaned forward in her seat. “I asked you to remove your scarf and show us your neck.”
Monica hesitated. “I don’t see why this is relevant.”
“Now, Miss Alexander.” Beverly lifted an eyebrow.
“Alrighty then.” Monica sighed and untied the scarf. Her eyes were downcast when she removed it altogether, revealing the scars on her neck.
A hush settled across the room. Beverly shifted in her seat and pointed. “Please explain this injury,” she said, in a sharp tone of voice.
Monica looked up at her. “I placed myself in danger and was bitten. It wasn’t Flynn’s fault.”
“Then who bit you?”
“Timothy, of the House of Sabrina. He’s dead now.”
“Only him? I see two sets of marks and what looks like a cut.”
Monica shut her eyes, rendering me blind for the time being. “No, Flynn did, too. He’d been injured and needed my blood to be able to finish the job. This was three days ago and he hasn’t made any move to harm me since then.”
The room fell silent once more and yet, I could feel the eyes of the Council upon Monica as though they gazed at me instead. Monica lifted her lids once more, in time for us to watch Richard lean forward in his chair. He shook his head. “Monica, I shouldn’t need to remind you of this . . . thing’s . . . sins again. He killed a member of our Council and his first watcher before even being turned.”
“In his defense, he was coerced. Sabrina used dark magic. You all know that. I’ve told you that.”
Richard eyed her in a stern fashion. “Nevertheless, that doesn’t dismiss the fact that he killed them in cold blood. And his deeds as a vampire are legendary. In five short years, he’s killed hundreds of humans and countless vampires still acting in accordance with the natural order. The only vampires he didn’t terrorize are the ones we would’ve targeted ourselves. The Seattle office has wanted him dead for five years. The only reason why we haven’t sent punished him for his atrocities . . . ”
“ . . . Which were likewise influenced . . . ”
“ . . . is because somehow, you convinced your parents . . . ”
“ . . . by Sabrina. Dark magic, Richard. I swear to you he . . . ”
“He is without excuse.”
The outburst shocked Monica into silence.
“Your parents have been informed of the situation. They lifted their hand of restraint.” Richard frowned in a paternal manner. “Child, will it take being drained to death for you to see what this creature is? I know you want to think the best of him and I know the promise you made to your sister, but this Council has never bound you to the soul of Peter Dawes.”
“I’ve done this of my own free will,” Monica murmured defiantly. “And I’ll continue doing it, even if it means being removed from the Order.”
“It might come to that.”
Monica stared down Richard. “Please don’t do this. Not when we’ve come so far.” She lifted her hands, as though presenting an offering to the six people who would decide our fate. “I know you think it’s the right thing to do, but you haven’t worked with Flynn like I have for the past few weeks. In that time, I’ve seen a sociopath become a penitent. He is a determined seer, Richard. That, in and of itself, is a miracle. Yes, I defied the Order in bringing out his powers. And, yes, the catastrophe that caused was terrible, but Peter’s spirit has been rest
ored and all that mess has been cleaned up . . . by him. He has a conscience and has used that conscience increasingly since getting it back. What more does he need to do?”
Richard sighed. “Our orders come from the High Council, Monica. They don’t see him being worth the risk. He possesses enough power to become one of our worst enemies if we don’t do something about it right now.” He paused. “And I agree with them. Our minds are made up and the vote in both Seattle and London was unanimous.”
He drew a deep breath inward, before nodding. “It is the decision of this council that you be arrested and stripped of your abilities. We further rule that the vampire Flynn, formerly known as Peter Dawes, is to be turned into the Order and executed. We make this decision in accordance with our solemn oaths, and for the protection of the human race.
“May The Fates have mercy on his soul.”
About the Author
Peter Dawes is the author of The Vampire Flynn Series, published by the micro-press Crimson Melodies. His serial story, "A Maker and His Child" appears on the BloodTideZine website and short "Lost Highway" has been featured in the Nocturnal Embers anthology, also by Crimson Melodies. While primarily a novelist, he has also contributed to the story cycle Red Phone Box, and has several novellas in the works. Always working on something new, Peter leaves it up to the reader to decide if it's by sunlight or candlelight.
http://peterdawes.wordpress.com/
More books by Peter:
Rebirth of the Seer
Fate of the Seer
A Vampire’s Game
Traitors Trilogy
by
Heather Kenealy
I was the first.
Loki Shapeshifter.
Mischief-maker of the Aesir.
Father of lies.
Disgrace of Gods and men.
I put fire in the blood of man,
And the Gods never knew it.
PANDORA Page 369