With every breath against my neck, I smelled the alcohol, reminding me of how drunk he was. My nipples grew hard despite the pain I felt inside. My panties were soaked. Physically, I was aroused. Emotionally, I’d never been more damaged.
Just when I felt like I would crumble in his hold, I heard my best friend singing softly into my ear. He was completely oblivious to my feelings in his drunken state. “Desperito, this is how we do it in Puerto Rico. Do you wanna play with my big burrito?” His face landed on my shoulder, and his arms tightened around my middle in a bear hug as Colton’s body began to shake with the force of his laughter.
Amid the tears and heartbreak, I was reminded of why I loved him so much. Of why no matter how much it hurt, I would love him always.
When I awoke the next morning, Colton had already left for practice. The only indication that I hadn’t imagined the entire ordeal was the faint sound of “Despacito” playing on loop coming from the direction of his laptop, which was still open on the desk. My life was such a fucking mess.
I glanced at the glowing red numbers on Colton’s alarm clock, noting that it was already after ten. I was meeting Gertie in an hour and was a hot mess in every way imaginable.
After a quick shower, I blew my hair out, applied minimal makeup, and threw on a sundress and flip-flops. Then I headed downstairs.
As I retrieved my purse on the way out, I noticed that someone had cleaned up my mess from last night. My eyes wandered to the couch and began to sting. I shook my head to myself as I pulled the door shut. Not today, Satan. I had to get a grip. Colton was free to put his dick wherever he wanted. Apparently, he wanted to put it in the mouth of every blonde hoochie in LA. But that was not my business.
My Uber arrived within two minutes. It seemed like there were always five cars lurking around any given corner in LA. The level of convenience was out of control. I was becoming spoiled.
Less than ten minutes from the time I walked out of the door, my driver was dropping me off in front of Sammy’s Café. Gertie said they had the best French onion soup and grilled cheese she’d ever tasted. Apparently, her son lived just down the road, and she ate there often.
Sammy’s was small, located on the corner of a shopping center. The entire front and left side of the restaurant were floor to ceiling windows. I spotted my friend right away seated at a booth with her wrinkly little arm flailing in the air to get my attention. My heart warmed at the sight of her. I loved that she seemed just as excited to see me as I was to see her.
A huge smile split my face as I yanked the heavy door open and rushed over to join her. Gertie stood, wrapping me in a tight hug. I squeezed her back. I didn’t want to ever let go. I knew no one apart from Colt and his friends in the city...But with Gertie, I could finally let my guard down a little. I knew she was on my side.
“All right. All right, child,” she said, patting the back of my head affectionately. “Have a seat and tell me alllllll about this blonde bitch.” Her lips curled into a smirk when my mouth fell open. “Oh, don’t look at me like that. Those were your words.” Gertie winked, slipping back into the booth.
“Well...” I laughed, taking a seat across from her. “There are two now. Actually, three altogether, but two since I messaged you.”
Her eyes narrowed as she sat back in her seat, crossing her arms over her chest. “What kind of shady shit are you kids doing in that house?”
Water sprayed from my nose as I choked mid-swallow. “Gertie!”
“Honey, I thought we decided you came to get the guy. So, explain to this old woman how you’re off dating his friends, and he’s having whores over to the house.” Her brows rose, and her eyes homed in on my face. Well, when she put it like that...
I felt my face heat with mortification. “Well, I...Blex said we should make him jealous...” Good one, Alexis. Blame Blex.
“Blex is...?”
I squirmed a little in my seat. The condescending look she gave me made me all kinds of nervous. “Colt’s roommate.”
Gertrude steepled her hands together, resting them beneath her chin. Her lips puckered in thought, twitching side to side. “How old are you, Alexis?”
A ball of nerves lodged in my throat. Why’d I suddenly feel like an errant child being chastised by a parent? “Twenty...”
“Mmhmm...”
Mmhmm...What did that even mean? “So...”
“So, don’t you think you’re a little too old for games, darlin’?”
Blood rushed to my cheeks. I could feel how red they were as I sputtered a bunch of nonsense...She was right. We weren’t children anymore. This wasn’t a game. This was my life. “I just thought that if I could make him jealous...”
Gertie’s head nodded slowly. “You thought you’d make him realize what he was missing...”
“Exactly! Except he’s just going about his business...Maybe he doesn’t have those kind of feelings for me, Gertie.” I felt tears burn the backs of my eyes. “What if it’s all one-sided?”
Gertie rolled her eyes, waving a hand in dismissal. “A blind man could see the love that boy feels for you. I saw it, Alexis. I felt it.” She thumped a hand on her chest. “Right here...You feel it too.” Her eyes met mine, daring me to deny it. “Tell me you don’t honestly believe that boy is crazy about you.”
My heart tightened in my chest. “I think...maybe...I mean, I guess. Yeah. I feel it. There are times I’m sure of it. But then I walk in and he’s getting a blowjob in the living room of the house we’re sharing, and I just don’t know how he could possibly feel the way I feel for him.” Tears lined my cheeks. I swatted them away.
“You don’t?”
“No! Who does that, Gertie? I mean, if he loved me...why? Why would he do that?”
Gertie covered her face with both hands, blowing out a long and frustrated breath. Her head finally came back up, and there was a sad smile on her face. “You, Alex...You have been doing that for three years. You’re the one here under the guise of trying to decide whether or not you want to marry another man. A man you’ve been dating for three long years. You’re flirting with his friends. Dating his friends.”
My jaw dropped as I was stunned into silence.
“Honey, when was that boy supposed to tell you he was in love with you?” Her warm hand reached out, rubbing the tops of mine, which were laced on the table in front of me. “You think you’re hurt, and you’re confused. Put yourself in that boy’s shoes for two minutes. What have you done to show him how you feel? Have you given him any reason to be confident enough in his feelings to think that you might actually return them?”
COLTON
I HAD MY FEET kicked up on the couch, watching Top Gun while stuffing my face with a bag of popcorn when I heard the front door knob rattle. Instantly, my heart rate sped up in anticipation of seeing her face. It was a physical reaction I’d been having for so long that you’d think I’d have gotten used to it by now. But I guess they wouldn’t call it addiction if people ever become numb to the high. Alexis Mack was like a drug to me.
“Hey,” she called out, rushing into the room with a smile that stretched from one ear to the other. Alex joined me by the couch, dropping a to-go bag from Sammy’s onto the coffee table. Then, she leaned over and pressed a kiss to my forehead. “Brought you some lunch.”
“Ahhh,” I moaned, patting my stomach. “You know the way to my heart.”
“Your dick?” she quipped.
I winked, sitting up on the couch to give her room to join me. “How was your visit with Gertie?” I asked, digging into the doggie bag as she sat to my left. Her leg pressed up against mine.
“Insightful.”
“How so?” I asked with a mouth full of club sandwich. I moaned my appreciation, giving Allie the old thumbs up.
Alex chewed on her lip, a nervous habit of hers. “She just made me realize some things.” Being evasive, were we?
I swallowed the food in my mouth, licking a bit of mayo from my bottom lip. “Such as?” I asked,
deciding not to call her out on how hard she was staring at my mouth.
“Hmm?” Allie asked, looking up to meet my eyes.
Chuckling to myself, I repeated the question. “What kind of things did Gertie make you realize...Stay with me here.” I winked and she smiled.
“Well, the most important thing is that I shouldn’t be wasting my time going out on dates when I came here to spend the summer with my best friend.” She blushed, nudging my arm with her shoulder.
“Have I told you yet how much I like Gertie?” I took another bite of my sandwich. “Wise, wise woman, that one.”
Her laughter hit me right in the feels. She sounded like my Allie again. Somehow, I knew everything was about to get better between us. It’s crazy how much I still missed her, even with her right here. We hadn’t been ourselves. We weren’t usually so tense with one another.
“I’m glad you feel that way...because she also said that you shouldn’t be having whores over to the house.”
I choked.
“Shit.” Alex was laughing so hard as she pounded on my back. “Dramatic much? Damn, Colton. I mean, if it’s going to kill you, you can keep the blonde Hoovers.” She rolled her eyes deliberately.
It took me a couple of minutes to dislodge the food that got caught in my windpipe. Allie sat there in hysterics throughout the ordeal. I cleared my throat a couple of times before responding to her last remark. “I’ll ditch the blondes, but I can’t promise I won’t need some mouth to cock resuscitation. He may go into shock without any attention.” I winked, tucking a finger beneath her jaw to push her mouth closed. “Know of any brunettes that want to attempt such an arduous task?”
Alex’s face turned beet red as she began sputtering all sorts of nonsense. “I can’t believe you just said that to me!” she finally got out.
“I can’t believe you aren’t willing to compromise here. Meet me halfway, baby.” I gave her my best hubba hubba eyebrows.
That little poke earned me a punch to the ribs. “You’re such a pig, Colton Fowler.”
I was having way too much fun with her, and I wasn’t ready to quit yet. “You remember that deal we made when we were kids?”
“Which one?” she asked, giving me a little side eye. She knew me well enough to know that I was up to something.
“Veda and Thomas,” I rasped, licking my lips to see how she’d respond.
Alex’s breathing quickened. “Mmhmm.” She nodded, looking around the room, refusing to make eye contact. As an unspoken rule, we’d never discussed that kiss.
“I thought we could maybe try something similar, for old time’s sake...”
She ran her tongue over her top teeth, glaring at me. “What’d you have in mind?”
This was going to be good. I wished I would have had a video camera to record her reaction. It was going to be epic. “Okay, so...hear me out before you go all batshit crazy on me, okay?”
“Just spit it out already!” She looked ready to strangle me and finish off the job I’d started with the sandwich.
“That is not what he said,” I quipped, earning myself a giggle.
“Colton...” She tried for a serious look, but there was no hiding that Cheshire cat grin she was wearing.
“So, it appears we could have a mutually beneficial arrangement here.” I moved my finger back and forth in the space between us. “It has recently come to my attention that you’ve got some horniness that needs tending to, and, well, my dick ain’t gonna suck itself, so...”
Alex jumped off the couch like her ass was on fire. Her skin was red from the tops of her ears to the tips of her toes. I couldn’t stop laughing as she just stood there, unable to form words.
“Cat got your tongue, Allie?”
“I’m not sucking your dick, Colton...” she warned, staring at my crotch.
I got up from the couch and walked over to stand in front of her. “It’s intimidating to most girls at first. I’ll ease you into it. Just think about it and let me know when you change your mind.”
Alex coughed, biting the sides of her cheeks in an attempt not to smile. “You said when not if,” she pointed out.
“I know what I said.”
“You’re awful.” She dug her finger into my chest.
“We’re a forgone conclusion, Allie...our parents would be so proud.”
Alexis shrugged, unable to argue that point. “Touché.”
“What’re you kids up to tonight?” Mom asked. Our weekly Skype sessions helped to shorten the distance between us.
“Alex is forcing me to take her to watch some new chick flick that just came out.”
Momma smiled big. “That sounds awful date-ish, Colton.” Her brows rose as she shimmied in her seat.
“Stop,” I deadpanned just as Alexis came out of the bathroom.
My heart skipped a beat at the sight of her. She was dressed simply in a flowered tank and wearing those damn short cut-off shorts again. Her hair was left loose in big waves. She wore makeup, but it wasn’t overdone. I couldn’t point out what it was about her that was rendering me speechless. I guess it was just her.
She rushed over, placing her hands on my shoulders and greeting my mother. “Hey, Mrs. Fowler,” she chirped like she was speaking to her long lost friend.
“Hey, baby. We miss you out here in the country. My boy treatin’ you okay?” It’s like I wasn’t even in the room any longer, and that was just fine by me. I was more than content to sit there with Allie’s tits pressed against my back and her breath hot in my ear.
“I miss y’all too. Colton is great.” She squeezed my neck in a hug, pressing a kiss to my cheek, right there in front of my mother. Was she trying to fuel the mother hens?
My mom was giddy as we said our goodbyes. We had to get moving if we were going to get decent seats.
“Did you see her face when I kissed you?” Alex asked as I laced her hand in mine and led her down the stairs. I knew she did that shit on purpose.
“You’re gonna get their hopes up, Allie.” I shook my head, and she let go of my hand to retrieve her purse from where she left it on the table near the door.
“Oh, relax. They’ve had their hopes up since we were in utero.”
She was still smiling at her own comment when I clutched her chin in my hand and turned her face up to mine. Confusion was written all over her face at the intimate gesture. I gulped, working up the nerve to say what was on the tip of my tongue. This time, I didn’t choke. “Okay, fine,” I said, rubbing my thumb back and forth over her bottom lip. “You’re going to get my hopes up.”
Alexis stared back at me. “You have hopes for us?” she asked, her voice so low and shaky that it was almost inaudible. But I was staring so hard, there was no way I’d have missed it even if the sound hadn’t accompanied the movement of her lips. Lips that I had been dying to kiss since she’d arrived, and even more so since we’d started our incessant flirting.
“So many,” I rasped. My heart was beating impossibly fast.
Her big brown eyes shone with barely contained emotion. She nodded, lifting her hands to caress the sides of my face, and then she breathed out a long sigh of relief. “Me too, Colton,” she stammered. “So many.”
I moved my hand around to cup the back of her neck and pulled her closer as I dipped my head and brought my lips to hers. And it was everything. Every single thing I’d remembered and more. I kept my hand on her chin, guiding her mouth as we licked and nipped. As our tongues battled out all of the suppressed emotions and a lifetime of regret. I ate up every whimper and moan until we became completely lost in each other. Losing myself in Allie felt a whole lot like being found. I knew without a doubt that this was where the two of us belonged.
“It’s about fucking time,” Finn called from the kitchen, causing Alex to pull away. She held onto my upper arms, resting her head on my chest. I could feel her entire body shaking against me. “You two were giving me blue balls.”
I chuckled into Allie’s hair. “Later, Finn,” I ca
lled, dismissing him. Trailing my fingers down the back of her arm, I clutched Alex’s hand in mine. “Ready?” I asked, dipping my head toward the door.
Her answering smile was all I needed to know that she didn’t regret the kiss we’d just shared. “Let’s go.”
“Later, lovebirds.”
I held Allie’s hand throughout the ten-minute drive to the cinema, feeling a lot like a fifteen-year-old on his first date. Such a simple gesture was a huge step for the two of us. We may have dipped a toe over the friendship line a time or two, but we made it our life’s mission to tread that line carefully. Sure, we’d held hands before, but that was as friends, and this was as...something more.
After purchasing tickets and snacks, we found seats in the back row of the nearly empty theater. It was still a little early, but we never were ones to risk being stuck in the front row.
“Colton?”
“Yeah, Al?”
She nibbled on that bottom lip for a moment. “Why is this weird?”
“Because we’re so used to hiding.” I brushed her hair from her eyes with the back of my hand. “It’s just different.”
“I’m all nervous and jittery. Like I have to keep reminding myself that it’s just you.”
“Hey,” I said, squeezing her hand. “It’s just going to take some time. We’ll take things slow. I’m not expecting anything more than you’re ready to give.”
Alex squeezed my hand, smiling up at me. “Thanks, Colt.”
I hated that she felt the tension too. We were so close that at times it felt like we were the same person, and yet here we were feeling like virtual strangers. Allie and I had reached a crossroads. It was time for the two of us to either go all in and make it work or cut our losses. We couldn’t continue with things the way they’d been. Neither of us would ever be able to give our hearts fully when half was already taken. It was time to double down. And if I had my way, we were going to come out on top.
Breakaway: A friends to lovers romance Page 9