by Vicki Green
Two days later, we were made to leave the hospital. Both of us had a hard time leaving without Annie. It was so good to be home again, lying in my own bed as I healed, but my heart was still at the hospital with her.
The next month was filled with going to the hospital twice a day, holding our daughter and feeding her. Memphis and the kids were allowed to hold her too! We were there as a family. The traveling in the deep snow was hard but worth every second we got to spend with her.
A month later, we finally got to bring her home. Our family was complete again.
Epilogue
Memphis
I look over at Sadie, holdin’ Mable Ann in her arms. Annie. I lean over and give a kiss on the top of Sadie’s head then kiss Annie on her chubby cheek, tellin’ Sadie I’ll be back soon.
As I walk outta the house and over to our gym, I think about how blessed we are but regret and remorse consumes me as I look towards the pasture. Clancy is buried by Pa’s oak tree, a small headstone sittin’ there. Beloved Friend. Then I look over at the small cemetery by the vegetable and flower beds where Ma, Pa, Mable, and now our little angel that didn’t get to come into this world lay. The baby was absorbed by Sadie’s pregnancy so we don’t know if it was a boy or girl so the headstone simply states: Our Little Angel.
As I walk up the front porch steps, I still think of this place as Mable’s home, even though the inside doesn’t resemble it anymore. Once she’d passed on, we decided to box up everythin’ we wanted to keep and gave away everythin’ else to the needy, then made it into a place we could work out. I swear sometimes when I’m pressin’ weights or runnin’ on the treadmill I hear Mable’s voice callin’ out to me. I shiver.
Today is Sadie’s and my eighth weddin’ anniversary. Gonna have a big party out back to celebrate with our friends. Well they’re really more than that. They’re family. As I get to the house and onto the treadmill, I turn it on and start walkin’, thinkin’ about all we’ve been through together. Lots of scares, lots of love, and happy times. I can’t believe how blessed I am. I kick it up a notch, turnin’ up the speed and start to jog. Pretty soon, I’m runnin’, sweat pourin’ off of me. Feels good. The burn and adrenaline.
Once I’ve worn myself out, I go take a shower down the hall and change into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. I leave some clothes over here for when I need them. Just as I walk outside, Colby’s climbin’ out of his truck, givin’ me a smile and a wave.
“Hey, Memphis. Got the canopy and chairs.”
I give him a nod and a smile. “Thank ya. I’ll drive my truck down to the back and set ‘er up. Follow me and we’ll get those put in place. Ya mind takin’ me into town to get the supplies for tonight?” I walk over to my truck and open the door. He opens his truck door and turns his head to me.
“Sure thing! Gonna be a hell of a party. I’ll follow ya. We’ll pick Trevor up when we leave for town. Said he wanted to help.” Of course he does. He winks and climbs in.
Don’t know what I’d do without these guys. We drive around back and I back into a spot off to the left of our deck, a ways out. We’ll put the big trough of ice and drinks on the tailgate and set the canopy up next to it with the chairs right outside. I know the girls, Shiloh, Prie, and Tina, will be over later to start cookin’ up a storm in our kitchen with Sadie, havin’ their own fun gettin’ ready. The preacher is due to come over right after supper so we can renew our weddin’ vows. Sadie’s idea. Don’t know why we need to do that. I couldn’t love her more than the first time I’d laid eyes on her. But it’s what she wanted so we’ll do it. I’d do anythin’ she asked. Give her anythin’ I could. No questions asked.
We get everythin’ set up. Looks pretty good, if I say so. We’ve got Steffy, the babysitter we use sometimes, to come over tonight and play with the kids, take care of Annie, and put them all to bed when the time comes. She’s staying the night in Evie’s room so she’ll be close to all of them. She’s a godsend and the kids love her. Besides, I have plans with my favorite gal after everyone leaves.
I find out on the ride with Colby into town, that Nash is out of town again. The man works too much but I guess it is who he is. Sad he’ll miss the fun tonight. I remember gettin’ so many calls from him durin’ our scare with Annie. He was so upset he wasn’t here to be with us. Good friend – family. By the time we get what we need and arrive back home, we find the kitchen a mess and the girls laughin’ as they cook. I stand in the doorway, watchin’ Colby walk over to Shiloh, kissin’ her and smilin’. I turn as Trevor makes his way through the mess and takes Prie into his arms, showerin’ her with kisses. Leanin back on the door frame, I take it all in. My heart fills up, so much love in the room. I don’t think I could be any happier. My family. My all.
It takes me a bit to tear Colby and Trevor away from their gals but I finally manage, chucklin’ as we walk down the deck steps, carryin’ the supplies we’d bought in town. Colby runs around the house, gettin’ in his truck and drives it down so we can unload everythin’ else we couldn’t carry. Everythin’ is settin’ up perfectly for tonight. Well I guess in a matter of a few hours.
Within a couple of hours, the girls have cleaned up the kitchen, said their goodbyes, and I said my see ya later’s to the guys. Sadie and I head upstairs, hearin’ the laughter of the kids with Steffy in their playroom down the hall.
Have you ever felt so full of life, so grateful for everythin’ you have, your heart ‘bout bursts wide open? Yeah, kinda feel that way right ‘bout now.
Sadie shoves me outta our room, tellin’ me to get ready in the guest room. I chuckle as I take my clothes next door, thinkin’ how in love I am with this crazy, wonderful woman. Once I’ve gotten cleaned up, shaved, brushed my teeth, and dressed, I head outta of the room and stop quickly from the sound of Annie’s cries comin’ from her room. My strides are long as I walk down the short distance to her room and walk right inside, pickin’ her up from her crib. “Now. Now. What’s all the wailin’ about?” I coo as I hold her against my chest. As I hold her bottom, I feel the wetness from her diaper immediately. “Ah! I see what’s got ya all upset.” I take her over to the changin’ table and lay her down, unsnappin’ the million snaps on her onesie. “I’d be upset too if I was layin’ in a puddle and tied up with all these dang snaps,” I mumble as I work. Takes me forever to get them all undone, my fingers too big for these little things. I get her cleaned up with wipes and chuckle when she laughs as I sprinkle some baby powder over her then wrap her up in a clean diaper. Pickin’ her up, I cradle her in my arms and walk over to the rockin’ chair. I sit down and start rockin’, her big eyes lookin’ up at me. She grabs my finger and squeezes. Pretty strong little gal.
“Oh, Memphis! I’m sorry! I was playin’ with Evie and Jared but I heard her. I’m sorry I didn’t get to her before ya,” Steffy says as she slides into the room.
I look up at her and smile. “It’s all good. Love spendin’ a little time with her before everythin’ starts. Go back to playin’. I got her.” I give Steffy a wink and she smiles, noddin’ as she walks back out the door.
I look back down at the bundle of love I’m holdin’ and smile. “Have I ever told ya ‘bout the day I met your ma?” A little smile moves her chubby cheeks up a bit. “Whelp, I knew right away as soon as she walked off that train that she’d be the gal I’d marry.” She gives me a strange look and I raise my brows. “No kiddin’. She opened that beautiful mouth of hers, showin’ all her stubbornness and pride, and I knew. Just as sure as I’m sittin’ here, I knew she’d be my wife.” Annie squeezes my finger again and kicks her little feet. “I know. She’s the best ma, isn’t she? Don’t know what I’d do without her.” I lean my head back against the wooden chair and smile, thinkin’ about that day. I feel her presence as I look down at my smilin’ girl and continue. “Your ma? She’s just about the brightest, most beautiful and perfect woman in the universe. ‘Course when s
he first came here she was stubborn, opinionated, and defiant.” I look out of the corner of my eye and see Sadie smilin’, leanin’ against the frame of the doorway. I chuckle and look back down at Annie. “She scared me,” I whisper. “She was wild and reckless and I was afraid somethin’ would happen to her or that I wouldn’t be able to give her what she needed. Not just ‘cos she was under my care but I already knew I couldn’t live without her.” Annie lets out what sounds like a snort, squeezin’ my finger. “Ya see. You have the best mama in the world. You’re such a lucky girl. And me?” I look up and turn my head when I hear a sniffle. I smile, still talkin’ to little Annie but lookin’ directly into Sadie’s eyes. “Well, I’m the luckiest of all. I get to be your papa and I get to be your mama’s husband.” I look down and see Annie closin’ her eyes. Slowly. Slowly. Closed. I look up and see tears in Sadie’s eyes. Quietly, I get up and lightly step to Annie’s crib, laying her down gently. I step away slowly, my hands up in the air as if I’m surrenderin’ to her stayin’ asleep. I turn and creep over to Sadie, takin’ her hand and pull her from the doorway and out into the hall. We stop just a few feet away, me turnin’ to face her and smilin’ as I wipe away some of the tears on her beautiful face.
“Memphis Johnson. Will you give me the greatest of honors and marry me?” she whispers.
I answer her the only way I know how. I push my fingers through her soft hair, cuppin’ the back of her neck as I pull her into me, kissin’ her hard. I wanna pick her up and take her to our bedroom, make passionate love to her but she stops me just as we start to get heated. I smile against her lips, loosenin’ my grip on her neck. “Sadie, I’d be the one honored for you to marry me.” I kiss her mouth. “Again.” Her giggles are music to my ears and to my heart. I take her hand, threadin’ my fingers through hers, and lead her down the stairs. “C’mon. Let’s go get this party started.”
Once we walk out onto the deck, we see everyone already havin’ a great time. I squeeze her hand and help her down the steps then we walk to the canopy. I don’t hesitate and take her right over to the preacher, suddenly wantin’ to renew our vows. Now. Thought it was strange before. I mean – we’ve been married for eight years, why do we need to go through this again? Then after holding Annie in my arms, tellin’ her how her ma and I met, thinkin’ about everythin’ we went through and where we are now – filled my heart up to the brim with love for her, makin’ me want to marry her all over again. Guess she did know what she was talkin’ about, renewin’ our vows, that there’s somethin’ special ‘bout doing that. “We’re here. Let’s do this,” I say, anxiously. I feel a hand on my arm and look down then up and into her eyes.
“Steffy is bringing the kids out. I wanted the whole family to be here,” she whispers, almost shyly.
I smile at her then turn my head, watchin’ Steffy walk up holdin’ a sleepin’ Annie, Sadie takin’ her in her arms. I feel a small hand push into mine and look to my left and down, seein’ Evie lookin’ up at me with a big smile brightenin’ up her sweet face. Jared walks to Sadie’s right and puts his hand on her arm, that same smile glistenin’ as he looks up at her and then at me. I tighten my hold on Evie’s hand and put my arm around Sadie’s shoulders. “Okay. Now, we’re all here.” Sounds of laughter fill the area behind us. A slight breeze blows around us under the canopy.
The preacher laughs quietly then becomes serious. “Folks,” he begins, lookin’ around. “We are here on this special day to celebrate eight years of marriage with Memphis and Sadie. Marriage is no easy task. Every day it takes diligence, hard work, compromise, forgiveness, love, and integrity.” He looks at Sadie and then at me. “These two folks have had many tests of their relationship but together they held strong with God’s strength. Let’s bow our heads.”
I listen to his words, his prayers over my family and me. I tighten my hold around Sadie and her eyes find mine. So filled with love. So beautiful inside and out. There’s so much I want to say, so much I feel, but I’m not sure I can find the words to describe it perfectly.
“Memphis and Sadie. Would you like to say a few words?”
Crap.
Sadie turns and hands our sleepin’ Annie to Steffy and then turns back to me, takin’ both of my hands in hers as I release Evie’s. I swallow hard, my emotions chokin’ me. “My love. Spending the last eight years with you haven’t been near enough. I came to you a spoiled, whiny brat and you changed me into someone who is so filled with your love, your kindness. You’ve made me the kind of person I always hoped to be. You’ve given me everything I could have ever hoped for.” She looks down at our hands, rubbin’ her thumbs over mine, and then looks back up at me. “Thank you for giving me your love, your home, your strength. Thank you for teaching me right from wrong and giving me the life I never thought I deserved. Thank you for…”
I couldn’t take it anymore. I pulled my right hand from hers, putting two fingers over her mouth quickly. Her eyes widened in surprise and I hear the preacher gasp but I couldn’t take it anymore. “Sadie,” I whisper.
“Mr. Johnson, I’m sure as soon as Mrs. Johnson has finished you can have a chance to…” The preacher starts but I start talkin’.
“You can’t thank me for things that you already had in you,” I begin. Sadie smiles against my fingers, her eyes softenin’. “Baby. There was no teachin’ you nothin’. You had all those things inside you and more. You were just a lost and lonely gal that had no one to show you what love really is. You were just lookin’ for it and hadn’t found it yet.” I smile, removin’ my fingers. She kisses them before I take hold of her hand again. “Now, I don’t know that much about lots of things but what I do know is that you’re a strong, vibrant, smart, beautiful, and wonderful woman. You’ve had three children. Although the debate is still out on who is Evie’s real pa is, with that dark blonde hair.” I chuckle. Everyone laughs around me and Sadie lets out a laugh herself. It’s always been a joke since she’s the only one with blonde hair. Sadie’s been tellin’ me for years that she was blonde as a child and her ma was blonde but I love continuin’ the joke. “But Darlin’…” I grow serious. “All I know is that you’re the best thing that ever stomped into my life and for that, I’m eternally grateful.” I open my mouth to continue but she leans into me and her mouth is on mine, shuttin’ me up before I can utter another word. Not sayin’ I mind. Clappin’ starts up around us but we don’t stop.
“Uh – yes, well.” I smile against Sadie’s lips as the preacher gets all flustered. “Memphis and Sadie, I declare your wedding vows renewed. Mr. and Mrs. Johnson would love for you all to partake in the celebration now.”
Thank fuck.
I kiss her back hard and deep, our tongues slidin’ against each other’s. I hear some coughin’ and open one of my eyes. The preacher is almost actin’ like he’s chokin’ on somethin’. Smilin’ against Sadie’s lips, I give her a couple of pecks then take her hand and turn us around to our friends. “Thank ya for comin’. Uh – you know how we feel about ya’ll.” I look at each person. “Ya’ll are more than friends. You’re our family.” Shit. Either the breeze is makin’ my eyes water or I might be gettin’ ready to cry. I take a deep breath. “Anyway, there’s beer and bottled water in the trough on my tailgate over there, tons of food, of course ya’ll know that since you’re the ones that made it, and Colby’s going go crank up the radio in my truck. Let’s party!”
Everyone starts chatterin’ at once. The guys go over to get a beer and the gals starts fixin’ plates. “I’m going to make Jared and Evie a plate so they can eat while Steffy takes Annie to bed and then she will take them to the house for the night when they’re done eating,” Sadie whispers in my ear, wagglin’ her eyebrows at me and makin’ me all hot and bothered. We haven’t had much in the way of sex since Annie came along with her needin’ so much more attention. And then Jared and Evie stay up a little later in the evenin’ since they’re older. Makes it kinda tough to g
et some alone time. But tonight – I’m plannin’ somethin’ special. Just gotta get this celebration done and everyone to leave then it’ll be just me and my love.
The night grows longer and longer by the hour. Don’t get me wrong, I love our friends – our family – and it was right nice of them to come and celebrate with us, even buyin’ us a few new things, which wasn’t necessary. It’s been a great night listenin’ to some awesome music and reminiscin’ about the past, but they really need to go. We’ve eaten, had drinks, danced, and even had some cake that Tina made us. It’s after midnight and the kids have been tucked in bed for hours. Steffy is in the house in case they need anythin’.
I start yawnin’, loudly. I raise my arms above my head and stretch. “Damn. Haven’t stayed up this late in a long time,” I say, yawnin’ again.
“Dang, Memphis. How often do we all get to come together and have a few drinks,” Trevor says, laughin’.
Colby rests his arms down on his legs, holdin’ a beer bottle. “Yeah. We’re all so busy. We never get time to have some fun together.” He smiles and winks. He knows I have somethin’ planned as I told him when we went into town today. Sly dog.
“And then she told me…” I stand and take the drink out of Tina’s hand. “What the?”
I smile as I walk over to the trash bucket we set by the long table of food. “Thank ya’ll for comin’.” I yawn again, havin’ a hard time gettin’ one to come out. “We really need to hit the hay though.”
“Memphis…” Sadie stands and starts walkin’ towards me. “We can stay up for a while longer.” She runs her hand up my shirt, over my chest. “It’s not every day we get to stay up late. Alone. Without the kids.” I grab her hand as it reaches my neck and twirl her around.