There was a pill bottle that looked like it had rolled under the chair and was leaning up against one of the legs. I picked it up and looked at the label. Oxycontin, 10mg. It seemed like I had heard about it before. It was used for severe pain.
I frowned and put the bottle on the chair.
“Kaitlyn?”
I turned around surprised.
Logan was in a pair of sweats and nothing else. Water was rolling off his chest as he rubbed a towel in his hair.
I shook my head, trying to look him in the face instead of anywhere else. My cheeks started to burn. “Sorry, I brought your shoes up but didn’t want to invade your space.”
He nodded. “Thanks, I need to put a shirt on.”
I nodded and moved to the side but he didn’t come forward.
“I’m sorry, can you just leave?” he asked.
“Oh. I’m sorry, I just wanted to bring them back to you.”
“Okay,” he said, but didn’t move.
I smiled at him and tried flirting with him. “Do you want me to get you a shirt? Or we could just both talk shirtless.”
He frowned and clenched his jaw. “No, but I do need to put a shirt on Kate. And I need you to leave.”
My gut clenched and my throat constricted a little. So, this was where he was going to pull back. He was reestablishing our boundaries and I was in the way.
I cleared my throat and let my face go blank. I tried not to show any emotion whatsoever.
“Okay, no problem. I’m actually exhausted and I’m not sure if I can stay awake. I was just coming up here to tell you and to say thanks. I’ll see you in the morning. I need to clean the tub downstairs and I can get to anything else you need me to.”
Logan was frowning at me. “Kate?”
My gut clenched again.
“I’m tired. Goodnight, Logan. Pleasant dreams.”
I gave him a tight smile and turned back toward the living room. My feet were moving but my brain was blank. I made it downstairs and turned off the light.
A tear rolled down my cheek as I laid my head down on my pillow.
Chapter Ten
I woke up late in the morning. The blanket was making me hot so I moved it off and rolled onto my back. Light was coming down from the staircase and creating deep shadows into the room.
Last night had been a bad idea. A terrible idea.
It was more than clear to me at this point that Logan was not who I thought he was. Maybe he was right from the beginning and I had placed him on too high of a pedestal. But my gut said that I hadn’t been wrong.
Sure, he was bad luck. My favorite bush had died! But there were a lot of really good things about him too. Even his slightly irritating overprotective behavior was good in some ways. It just showed that he was worried.
Then there was the man who told me to leave last night. I still didn’t understand what I had done. I thought we had shared something at least slightly meaningful. The thought made me want to curl up and cry all morning.
My body felt heavy and broken. The more I kept thinking about last night the more I wanted to scream about it. It had been an awful mistake.
There were things I had to do today though and they weren’t going to get done if I sat around feeling sorry for myself.
Life was still semi-good. I grasped for something to feel good about and came up blank.
Last night something had cemented within me about how I felt about him. Only love could cause the heart to break, and if that was the case then I did love him. I had watched him so many times over the last few months. He was kind and gentle with people. He had always been friendly with everyone, made people smile and even comforted people when he needed to. A lot of people respected him. I seemed to be the only element that made him surly.
I wasn’t sure what was going on with him and his medication. Maybe he was in a lot of physical pain for the burns he had gotten last year. I had heard that it had been caused by an explosion at Liv’s house but hadn’t heard about Logan’s treatment afterward. Even after my awful experience last night, I felt bad that he didn’t have someone to lean on all these months.
And that person wasn’t going to be me going forward either. I needed to leave. Badly. Forget about him.
I grabbed my cell off the nightstand.
Kate: Andi are you at the clinic today?
Andi: Nope. I have some errands I need to run. Why what’s up?
Kate: I need to pick up Bells. Nothing major.
I technically wasn’t lying. I did need to pick her up. I was omitting that I was leaving with her though.
Andi: Okay. You know where the key is!
I got dressed and resolved that I was going to go upstairs and just tell him that I had found a place. Or that Andi was going to let me stay with her. Maybe I could just tell him that I felt more comfortable somewhere else. He probably wouldn’t care much either way.
I threw all my clothes and items back into the boxes I hadn’t gotten rid of yet and piled them by the staircase.
I took a deep breath.
Just do this already. Time to face reality
I walked upstairs but didn’t hear him. He must have slept in too.
In the kitchen, I didn’t see anything out of place. Not that I would, he seemed to be a very tidy person in general. My eyes swept over the island and there was a note on it.
Had to go out. Logan
Well that made things a lot easier. I searched around for some paper in his drawers. Along with the sticky note I found two empty bottles of the same pills I saw the previous night. I picked one up and the doorbell rang.
When I answered Cade was on the front porch.
He had served in the military with Logan and the other men a long time ago and I knew they were all good friends. I had met him a few times, once at his club, Medusa, and another time at Muse Bar and Grill. He had even offered me a job months ago but I had turned it down because it wouldn’t have fit into my schedule.
He had been nice to me both times even though he didn’t know me very well. I suspected that it was because I knew Liv and Julia but he also just struck me as the type of person who was protective of women in general. He had an innate quality to him that made him trustworthy in a sense even though I couldn’t tell why.
He smiled, “Hey, Kate, how are you?”
I shrugged. At this point, there was no use in lying about my mood. I felt like crap.
“Okay I guess. Logan had to go out. He left a note.”
Cade frowned at me. He looked a little like Holden sometimes. Same athletic and muscled body but he was always clean-shaven. Cade always had a look about him that made him seem much older than his friends. It was something about the eyes.
He looked down at my hand, which still had the bottle in it and nodded at it. “Rough morning?”
I raised it up and sighed. “No. This is Logan’s. He has them all over the place. He’s a neat freak with everything else.”
He followed me in when I turned and went back to the kitchen. His gaze went directly to the drawer I had opened and he yanked it open further. Two empty bottles rolled forward.
“Motherfucker,” he mumbled and looked up at me. “You don’t know where he is?”
I set the bottle I had been holding down on the counter and snatched up the sticky note I had found. I thought about what I wanted to tell him and gave up.
“No, and I don’t care. I’m leaving. I don’t care if I ever see him again.”
Cade’s face looked alarmed. He reached out and grabbed my shoulder. “Kate, what happened?”
“Nothing happened.”
I tugged at his grip but he held fast.
He looked at my neck. In the mirror this morning, I had noticed a bruising spot where he had bitten me. It was kind of like a hickey but a little more purplish around the edges.
“Kate. Fucking tell me what happened. Now!”
I gave up but didn’t look at him. “Please don’t tell anyone.”
“That de
pends on what it is,” he said quietly but lethally.
I looked up at him and swallowed the lump in my throat. I knew this was his friend but he had always been extremely nice to me when I had bumped into him. He was a lot like Brock in that way. Like an older brother of sorts.
He squeezed my arm.
I swallowed again. “We had sex. Then he basically brushed me off. I don’t know what I did. He said we were going to talk, then I came up and brought back his shoes. He was in the shower and he came out and told me to leave. So I went to bed. I don’t get it and now I’m just packing up my crap. If he doesn’t want me here then I’m out.”
Cade growled. “You were a virgin.”
It wasn’t a question so I didn’t answer. I didn’t say anything for a minute. As if it wasn’t humiliating enough, everyone seemed to know that I had been. They were probably all amused by it.
I jerked my arm from him. “Yeah well, not anymore. Happy birthday to me. I’m leaving anyway so it doesn’t matter. This was just a temporary living arrangement thing. I just didn’t think he was that kind of person. It’s my fault for letting it get this far.”
Cade sighed. “He’s not that kind of person, Kate. I know for a fact he wouldn’t do something like this unless something was wrong. Logan’s not like that. I know a lot of guys that are, Kate, but not Logan. He takes care of what’s his.”
I looked sadly up at him. “I’m not his, Cade. Never have been. We’re just friends. I’m packed up. I’m just going to load the car and get out of here before he gets back.”
“Friends my ass. He’s been an idiot around you for months. Everyone knows it.”
“Well, I don’t know it!!” I screamed at him. “He tells me stuff and we do stuff, but then he sets these boundaries. Then last night we were together and it was a horrible mistake!”
Cade looked like he was thinking deeply about something. “Kate, I know he likes you. He wouldn’t be acting like that if he didn’t. I think he’s going through something here. We’ll get a hold of him and see what’s going on.”
“NO! I don’t want to see him. I just don’t need the rejection today. I’m just so tired at this point. I’ve been fighting it and I just can’t do it anymore.”
A tear slipped down my cheek, then another and I stomped my foot. Angry that I was hurt.
Cade grabbed me into a bear hug. It wasn’t something I was expecting so I resisted for a minute then gave up. I buried my head in his shirt and let out a sob.
“Kate, just give me a couple of days and I’ll get him sorted out. We all will, one way or another. Do you have some place to stay?”
I stepped back when his arms loosened and wiped my face. “Yeah.”
“Okay, where’s your stuff, I’ll help. Just a few days Kate.”
I didn’t care what Cade said. I was still out of here. I scribbled my note for Logan and put it on top of the one he had left me. It wasn’t much but it said what I thought of him and also said goodbye in a way. As much as I wanted to tell him I hated him in this moment, I couldn’t, because I didn’t.
You’re beautiful. X Kaitlyn.
He followed me downstairs and looked around. His eyes fell to the white sheets.
I glanced over in the direction he was looking and saw a spot of blood on the edge.
“Motherfucker, I am going to kill him. He got rough with you.”
I grabbed his arm. “No, just help me get this in the car. Believe me, it was enjoyable and mutual. It may have been a mistake, but he didn’t do anything wrong.”
Cade clenched his jaw and looked furious, but didn’t say anything else as he packed my car.
I got in the driver’s seat after we were done. He leaned over the window and gave me a tight smile.
“A couple of days.”
Logan’s Lexus drove down the street. It swerved slightly when it got closer, then pulled into the driveway and halted with a screech.
He got out, slammed the door, and scanned over the boxes in my back seat.
His face turned red and he seemed to grow in size. Suddenly he looked furious.
Cade tapped the top of the car and said, “Go Kate. Right now.”
I pulled out of the driveway and heard Cade and Logan yelling at each other. Half the block could probably hear them.
Then I heard Logan roar. “KAITLYN!”
My heart clenched and I looked in the rearview mirror. Cade tackled Logan, who was trying to run across the lawn and pinned him to the ground. Logan was fighting him with everything he had.
I sped up and headed to Andi’s house.
* * *
I was two hours into my long journey when I got a text from an unknown number.
Unknown: Logan is going into rehab. 4 weeks. One of Aiden’s clinics.
Unknown: He’s fine. Pissed as fuck. Won’t be able to talk in there. Thought I would let you know. Cade.
I frowned. Rehab? I didn’t understand.
Kate: Why?
Unknown: Pills. Opiates. He’s addicted. Just give him some time.
Kate: Hope he gets better. I’m going to be gone too.
Unknown: Kate give him a chance. Don’t do anything yet. If you’re not here when he gets out he’s going to find you.
Kate: Thank you Cade.
I pulled over on the side of the road.
Cade’s number popped up on an incoming call and I rejected it.
Bells was in her cage sleeping. Unlike most cats she actually did pretty well travelling. She didn’t like being on a leash to potty but she did okay in the car.
I called Andi.
“Hey girl!” she answered.
“Hey, I need to give you a new number Andi, but you have to promise not to tell anyone.”
She was silent for a moment. “What’s going on Kate. Where are you?”
I sighed. “I’m on the road. I have to turn my other phone off. Let me give you my new number but please, please, please don’t give it to anyone. Not even Julia. I need some space for a while and this is the only way.”
“What happened?”
I clenched up thinking of Logan’s face when he laughed in the kitchen.
“I just needed out of there,” I said, as I choked up. “I have something I need to do out of state so Bells is with me and we’re on the road.”
“Kate, what happened? Did he do something?”
“No. Not at all. I just don’t want to see him again. Ever. It’s too painful already. It’s time to move on. No biggie.”
She let out a huge sigh. “I don’t like this Kate. What if you get into trouble on the road?”
I smiled a little. “Then I call you and you come help me kick some ass.”
“Wow, cussing. Maybe the open road agrees with you.”
“Maybe I’m just learning it doesn’t matter one way or the other whether I do or I don’t. Anyway, here’s the number. Don’t share it with anyone. I’ll text you when I get to where I’m going.”
I recited the number to her
“Okay. Hey Kate?”
“Yeah?”
“Sure you’re okay?”
I sighed. “I will be. Life goes on. I just need to find some peace for a while.”
“Okay. Check in with me though. What are you doing with your other phone?”
“Eh, I’m just going to turn it off. It’s paid two months ahead but I’m not going to use it. I picked up a cheap one at the grocery store before I left.”
“Gotcha, be safe and call me. Bye.”
“Bye, Andi.”
I set the phone down and it beeped again. Incoming picture from Brock.
Great. That’s all I needed.
I opened it and it looked like a satellite picture of west Texas. I looked through the windshield and saw the lights of a giant truck stop ahead of me. When I looked back down at the picture it had a red X about where the building was on the map.
“Hmm, X marks the spot,” I mumbled.
Kate: Cut it out Brock. I need to be alone.
B
rock: What is “alone” really? You’re in your car and no one is there but I’m watching you so you’re not technically alone. Should we debate it and have some lunch tomorrow? Come back, we’ll talk.
He was so weird sometimes.
Kate: I’m turning off my phone, creeper. Good luck with Andi. Don’t think she’s in to the voyeur thing.
Brock: I’ll make sure to ask her. Where are you going? Come back to Lakefield.
Kate: No. I’m going to find a happier place.
My phone started ringing. Brock was calling and I rejected it.
Brock: Would you like me to keep calling or send the state police after you?
My phone rang again and I picked it up.
“Why are you spying on me Brock?” I asked, letting out a tired breath.
He laughed. “I’m not spying. I’m just keeping track of you.”
“And again, why?”
He paused and I couldn’t hear anything for a minute.
“Kate, I did a background check on you the day after you started working for the clinic. You already went through the regular one so it wasn’t necessary. But the doc wanted to know about you. So, I checked. Didn’t think much of it at the time until I saw him get weird at the wedding.”
“And? Why are you telling me this? So you did a background check. That means?”
“Logan doesn’t do those Kate. He’s never asked for anything. Not once until you came around. Aiden, Holden, and Cade are always asking for crap. Not the doctor, Kate.”
“It doesn’t really matter now Brock. Whether he did or he didn’t, we’re not together.”
“He’s an amazing person Kate. We all have a deep respect for him. That’s why, until today, no one has punched him in the face when he fucks up. He patched us up so many times I can’t even give you a count. He’s in rehab, he’ll get out. The first thing he’s going to do is try to find you. He’s not an asshole. He’s just addicted.”
Logan’s blue eyes popped in my head.
“Then good luck to him. I’m sure he’ll be fine,” I grumbled.
“Kate, that explosion fucked his back up bad. He spent months in and out of the hospital. All those people he works with know what his back looks like. Don’t you think that you would be a little screwed up from that too? Everyone has a breaking point.”
Break (Lakefield Book 3) Page 10