by M. K. Dawn
“This can't be happening!” I scream into the storm. The last month has been surreal, painful, terrifying. After much convincing, I had reluctantly come to terms with my role in this world because everyone around me was so sure, so supportive. I had even come to terms with marrying Henry, for Gods’ sake.
But deep down, I always knew it wasn't right. And when I told them as much all I got back was lies. How many people had been in on it? Does it even matter now? It won't change the fact that I’m not who they said I was. So, who am I?
I'm a stupid naive girl, sitting on the fucking edge of this fucking rock during a vicious storm. The wind blowing so hard that if I let go for a second, I will most likely meet my fate in the waters below. I close my eyes. All those years as a child, lost, forgotten, come flooding back, evoking feelings that I don't want to endure right now.
“Alaina!” My name is yelled over the storm. I look back at the castle and see Eric running towards me. “Please, Alaina, move away from the cliff,” he begs.
I don't back up, instead I turn and face him, now sitting with my back to the edge.
“You lied to me!” I scream.
“Yes… no, please just give me a chance to explain.” Eric crumples to the ground, not quite in reach. “It’s complicated.”
“She is the rightful queen?”
“Like I said, it’s complicated.”
“That is the queen in there, correct?” I point towards the castle. He nods. “That’s her daughter?” He answers with another nod. “Well then, it doesn’t seem that complicated to me.”
“Please, Alaina, come with me and I will tell you everything.” He stands and holds out his hand for me to take, just like he always did in my dreams.
Then, all at once, the anger I have been holding onto erupts. Years of being dragged around place to place, my life being controlled by someone else. Lies upon lies that have been told to me, to get me to do what they wanted me to do and go where they wanted me to go. I don’t know who to trust anymore. I just know that I can’t go down this road again.
Behind Eric, Brady rushes out of the castle, followed by the rest of the warriors. Were they in on it as well? Again, does it matter? They are sworn to protect the royal family and I am now enemy number one.
In that moment, I make my decision. I stand and brace myself against the winds. With my orb in hand, I whisper a small prayer to the Gods that I wished I believed in, close my eyes, and let go.
Epilogue
Alaina
I'm drowning. Water rushes down my throat and fills my lungs. I can’t breathe.
Not water, but something else, something hard. Sounds go off all around me. Someone screams my name. I can hear people running. They have pulled me from the ocean. They are going to kill me. I have to fight. I don’t want to die.
The light is blinding and I can’t make out who is there, or what they are doing to me. I kick and hit at anyone who tries to touch me. More people arrive and hold me down. The thing in my throat is pulled out just as a cold sensation fills my arm. Then everything fades away.
***
The nightmares are back. I haven’t had them since I came to Nysa. But it’s different now, they’re different. They aren’t just dreams, they’re memories. And now I know the people in them. They have names. They are my friends, my family. I wake up thrashing, needing to get back to them. My eyes desperately try to adjust to the light and my throat is killing me. There are strange noises all around me, noises I should know but can’t pinpoint.
“Just relax,” a familiar voice tells me, and my body does just that.
The person begins to speak, but I can’t make out the words. The images in my head begin to fade. Then they are gone. I can’t remember what I was dreaming about. But deep down I know they were important. Weren’t they? “Sleep,” the voice orders.
My eyes close as sleep takes hold.
***
“Alaina?”
That voice. My eyes open and try to adjust to the blinding light. Then I see her. I can’t fight the tears that well in my eyes. “Gina?” I can’t believe she’s here.
“Who else would be sitting in this hospital room waiting for you to wake up… Mandy?” She snorts, but there is no humor in her voice.
“Where am I? What happened?” I try to sit up but the dizziness pulls me back down. “I think I'm going to throw up,” I groan.
“Dude, gross!” She passes me a bowl and gags. “If you start doing that, I'm out of here.”
I look around and try to come to terms with reality. “I'm in a hospital?”
“Umm, yeah. That’s where you go when you show up on the side of a river half drowned.” She’s trying to be strong but looks like she’s about to cry.
“What?” I whisper, almost to myself. “How long have I been here?”
“In the hospital, about a week. Missing? A month.” Her eyes are tired. I wonder how many of those days she spent sitting in that chair. She takes a seat on my bed, her eyes red and swollen, then pulls me close and we both break.
“You almost died,” she whispers, not letting go of me.
I nod, not really knowing what to say.
She breaks our hug, wipes her eyes, and gives me a sad smile. “Do you know what happened? Dean Meel and Dr. Siple said that you were fine; went on a trip to visit some recently discovered family and forgot your phone. But when you didn't call me after a few days I got worried. I kept pressuring them but they assured me that you were fine and you would contact me as soon as you could. Then a month later, you show up on a riverbank half dead. The police think you never made it to your family, that you were kidnapped. Was it Brady? I'm so sorry I tried to push him on you. I didn't know.” She’s about to cry again.
I take a breath, wanting to tell her everything I went through, but I can’t seem to grasp hold of my thoughts. I try to focus but everything feels jumbled, like the memories are there but I just can’t get to them. “I don’t remember,” I tell her, as the doctor walks in.
“How are we feeling? You gave us quite a scare.” He smiles at me and gives Gina a wink.
“My throat is sore and my head is killing me, but other than that I'm good. That, and the fact that I can’t seem to remember anything that happened to me.”
He picks up my chart and flips through the pages. “That’s from the breathing tube and the concussion. We are going to run some tests, and if all looks good, you should be able to go home in a few days. You will need someone to take care of you.” He glances towards Gina.
“No problem. She’s my roommate. I’ve got it covered.” She gives me a devilish smile.
“Great. Now get some rest, young lady,” he says, then looks back at Gina again.
“I have to get to work anyway. Someone has to pay the bills.” She winks, smiles, and kisses the top of my head, then walks out.
A nurse comes in the room shortly after. She has a friendly face but I still tense as she takes my vitals and draws blood. When she’s finally done, I'm exhausted but restless. I have a feeling I’m forgetting something. It’s right there, on the tip of my tongue.
Frustrated, I try to force myself to relax. It doesn’t work, but I find my eyes closing anyway. I bet that nurse gave me a sedative. The last thing I see, as my vision fades, is a pair of blue eyes staring back at me.
The next day, the doctor allows me to talk to the police. I tell them the only thing I can remember. I left the bar after my shift. I was sure someone was following me. I ran out into the road and then blacked out. The police think that whoever was following me must have kidnapped me and kept me drugged. Then I escaped somehow and ended up in the river. I give them a description of the man who tried to attack me that day in front of the school. Thinking of him sends shivers down my spine. I get the feeling I know his name, but again, I can’t seem to pull it out of my head.
Once I’m released from the hospital, I move in with Gina. While I was missing, she had gone to New Ridge and packed up all my stuff, then set my room up f
or me, like she knew I was coming home. She is the best friend a girl could ask for. That night we stay up talking. She fills me in on everything she and my friends did to try and find me. My face was plastered all over the local news. Flyers were handed out. They even held a midnight candlelight vigil, praying for my safe return. She cries, reliving it all. I cry at all the pain I caused her.
A few days later, I try going to New Ridge to talk with both Meel and Siple but am told they are out of town for a conference. This doesn’t sit well with me, but I brush the feeling away. There are so many unanswered questions about my time missing. I need to know why they told Gina I was visiting long lost family. I don’t remember ever telling them that. Maybe the kidnapper told them?
When Gina starts college, I go to my doctor and beg him to allow me to go back to work. I’m relieved when he agrees. I’m so sick of being at home, alone. It’s enough to drive me crazy. I end up working the day shift most days when the bar is also a grill. Occasionally I pick up some night shifts when I can.
Now, almost two weeks since my re-appearance, my life has pretty much gone back to normal. Except for the emptiness that plagues me. During one of my follow-up visits, the doctor said I may have a touch of depression, but it feels more than that. It feels like a piece of my soul is missing. I can’t explain it. I can’t let go of it. It’s constant, all-consuming, and leaves me feeling dead inside.
Today has been the worst day so far. I almost couldn’t get out of bed. Gina finally dragged me out around five so I could take a shift for one of the girls who called in sick tonight.
Usually work helps keep my mind off things, but not tonight, probably because it’s slow as hell in here. I have nothing but time to stand around and focus on the emptiness.
As if reading my mind, Gina yells out. “Jesus, it’s so slow tonight. It’s Saturday night, where the hell is everyone! People should be out getting drunk and finding someone to go home with. Maybe I should knock off early and find someone that I can do just that with.” She smiles at a cute guy walking by.
“Gina!”
“What? I'm bored and horny! If I'm not making any money, the least I can do is get laid.”
“Oh, my Gods, just take my tables.”
“What? No!” she shakes her head.
I take off my apron and hand her the credit cards I'm holding for the guys who started a tab. “Just take them. I’ve been working a lot of extra shifts and I'm tired. I really just want to get the hell out of here and go to bed.” I wasn’t really tired, but I would tell her anything to keep her from hooking up with some random guy.
She rolls her eyes and then hugs me bye. She doesn’t protest too hard; I have a table full of cute seniors in my section.
I run to the back of the bar and let the manager know I'm leaving. He looks up through the smoke, gives me a goofy smile, then waves and sticks another Twinkie in his mouth. I wonder if he even knows he is supposed to be running a bar.
I grab my purse from my locker and head out the back door. It’s not until I step outside that I realize what time it is. The moon is high, about half full. I take a deep breath trying not to think about the last time I walked this dark alley alone. It doesn't help. Panic tries to take over as memories of that night come flooding back but I force it away. I start walking home, glancing behind me, afraid someone will jump out and grab me at any moment. As I walk across the road, I notice something shimmering in the moonlight. After looking both ways to make sure there are no cars coming, I bend down and pick up the light pink shard of rock. Studying it, I absentmindedly touch the stone in the necklace around my neck.
Brady’s face flashes in my mind. I see us standing in the woods, searching for his orb, the broken pieces laying in his hand. Then it all comes back, every moment from every day I was in Nysa. The friendships, the fear, the loss, the betrayal. I collapse on the ground as the emptiness I have been feeling these past few weeks is replaced with an overwhelming number of emotions. Tears fall freely. I don’t even realize that I’m sitting in the middle of the road until the headlights hit my eyes. I stumble out of the way just in time to see the car speeding by me.
Sitting there, on the side of the road, I give myself a moment to fully come to grips with everything I’m remembering. Then I make a decision. I’m not going to wait around for someone to come find me once again. I need answers. I need to know who I really am and why I was pawned off as the princess. Jumping to my feet, I take off running for the only place I know that can give me answers to the questions burning in my head: New Ridge.
Other Books by M.K. Dawn:
The Nysian Trilogy
Book 2 – The Nysian Prophecy Revealed
Book 3 – The Nysian Prophecy Fulfilled
The Decay of Humanity Series
Book 1 – Dusk of Humanity
Book 2 – Descent of Humanity – Spring 2019
How We Met Novellas
Under the Texas Sky
The Immortal Wars Trilogy
Book 1 – The Immortal Plague
Book 2 – The Immortal Deceit – Dec 1, 2018
Book 3 – The Immortal Affliction – Winter 2019
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