He laughed at that. What an irony. ‘A friend?’
‘I didn’t mean it like that.’
‘Then … you do not hate me? Find me disgusting and repulsive? Beyond redemption?’
‘You are many things, Robert Mallory, but beyond redemption is not one of them. Do you think I would have tried so hard to get you to see me as someone you could love if you were a lost cause?’
Dare he to hope that the smile at the corners of her lovely, lovely lips was encouragement? He took both her small hands in his much larger ones and pressed them to his heart. ‘If I were to give myself to you, freely and completely, would you accept me, despite everything I’ve just told you?’
She seemed a little shaken, unsure, panicked, and her lips trembled.
‘Are you saying that you are giving yourself to me freely and completely?’ Her voice trembled.
‘I’m saying that I love you. That I have loved you since the first time you flashed your big brown eyes at me and told me off for being so rude and arrogant. Only I didn’t want to see it, I didn’t want to acknowledge it because then it would mean giving you my heart, a heart that was only barely functioning. It would mean I would be giving you control of my soul, of me. I didn’t want … I didn’t know if I could … It was a danger that I was not prepared to put myself in again. I swore that day on that wall overlooking the Thames that I would never be a fool in love again.
‘It took me a long time to realise that you were not her and you were not like all those other unfaithful, skittish women who had slept with me while their husbands’ backs were turned. I saw them as nothing but objects to slake my lust, my anger at the world, at... her, at James for dying and at me.’
‘Is this why you became the Collector of Hearts? Because you were angry?’
‘In a way. After James’s death and after Quinn had taken me to the Hall to recuperate, we returned to London. I thought I would be prepared if I saw her but I was far from ready to see her on the arm of her new husband. I decided to punish her by proving that she had picked the wrong man. I set about increasing my wealth and I started charming the most beautiful women of the ton out of their corsets and into my bed. And I made sure she knew about it.
‘It was revenge at first, yes, but later I liked the power of being him and not me. I went into the duels willingly, wanting, hoping, one of the silly sods would kill me. I wanted it to end. I asked for it because I was not strong enough to do it myself. She had made me weak of heart and yet the Collector of Hearts was strong and dangerous. I should never have let it go on for so long but I didn’t know how to stop.’ He kissed her forehead as tears rolled down her cheeks. ‘Quinn sensed it, I think, and still he tried so hard to save me, but I was in too deep. I may have even resented him for trying, but then I met you.
‘I saw in you a new beginning but I was too scarred by the past to take what you were offering. Your friendship meant a lot to me. I couldn’t believe you even wanted to give me your friendship when I only wanted your body. You made me see that there is more to life than my endless pursuits. For so long I thought my life was worth nothing because I refused to let love be my reason for living.’
Arabella shook in his arms, overcome with her emotions. Robert only wanted to soothe her, but he knew she had to get it out of her system, as did he.
She sniffed and wiped her tears away. ‘You have love all around you. Your mother loves you so much it hurts to see her looking at you. Quinn would be lost without you, Lady Shacklesbury and Amy adore you and, even though Isabelle is angry with you right now, she can’t help but love you because I do. We are all here for you.’ She kissed him then, briefly on the lips. ‘I am here.’
He shook his head. ‘The last thing I want to do is hurt you further. I love you, Arabella, but I will walk away if you tell me you will not have me.’
Arabella wound her arms around his neck. ‘I am never letting you walk away from me again.’
The relief that swept through him made him stagger. Could she love him as he loved her despite everything he had been? ‘I love you,’ he whispered into her ear and he felt her squeeze him tighter.
‘I love you too. I always have. There has never been any other for me, and there never will,’ she vowed.
He smiled. ‘I was so sure you would be horrified by my actions with Faulkner. I killed him and I’ve maimed countless others. Does this not concern you?’
‘Of course it does. It is never easy to hear bad things about the one you love, but if Faulkner could forgive you for taking his life, don’t you think it is a dishonour to him and his memory not to live the life you have to the fullest? Did he not concoct that story to save you so you may live even if he did not? I can’t say I agree with how you handled it, but you no longer need to be a slave to the Collector of Hearts. Be free of him and instead, love me.’
‘Oh Arabella, you are my heart. I promise to never give you reason to distrust my love for you.’
He kissed her again and then, letting her go, grinned down at her. He laughed and picked her up around the waist and twirled her around before sliding her back down his body for more kisses.
‘Arabella Fleming,’ he said in a serious tone when he finally set her away from him, ‘will you be my wife?’
She didn’t quite react the way he thought she might. There was no squealing in delight and gasps of joy. Instead, she took a step away from him. Wasn’t this what she wanted, a full confession of his love for her? A proposition of marriage?
‘I would love to marry you Robert, but …’ She looked down at her hands.
‘But what?’ he asked, confused. She’d said she loved him, so what was the problem?
‘I want to be courted,’ she said.
He blinked. ‘Courted?’
‘Yes, courted. You can’t expect to just announce your love for me and then turn around and just marry me.’
‘Why the hell not?’ he asked in frustration.
‘Because it is not the way it’s done, that’s why,’ she replied. ‘Nobody knows that we have kissed and done... other things. It would be a bit sudden to progress from friends to husband and wife, don’t you think?’
‘You’re not joking, are you? I don’t wish to play any more games, Arabella. I am tired of it,’ he said, his voice rising with agitation.
‘As am I. This is not a game.’
‘Is it a test?’
‘Just a formality, to keep my parents happy. So society doesn’t have reason to suspect you have collected me.’
Damn it all to hell! He sighed. She was right. He owed it to her to do this thing right. If she wanted to be courted he’d bloody well court her, and then some. ‘So what will this courting involve?’
‘I promise not to make it too torturous for you,’ she said with a smile.
‘Why does this not sound at all like fun?’ he replied, tightening his arms around her.
‘It can be as much fun as you wish to make it.’
‘Is that so?’ He raised a brow.
She laughed and pushed against his chest. ‘Not that much fun.’
The brow came down. ‘Why not? Are we not to be wed?’
‘Don’t you want to wait until our wedding night?’
‘No!’ Bloody hell! Courting and no bed-sport? What did she think he was made of, iron?
She pulled out of his embrace. ‘Come, I want to tell everyone.’
He took the hand she held out to him but did not go any further. ‘And tell them what? That we are not engaged?’
‘Oh, Robert.’ She turned and placed her hand on his cheek. ‘We will tell them you are courting me. But first, you must get Father’s permission.’
‘I knew there was a downside to this.’
‘Now, now. Father is not liable to object if you do it right, and it would do you a world of good to try and make peace with him,’ she censured as she tugged him towards the door.
‘I never made war,’ he muttered.
‘You know what I mean. Please, it would
mean a lot to me if you would come to some kind of truce.’ She placed a quick kiss on his lips, then another and another.
‘You’re a determined little baggage, aren’t you?’
‘That’s one of the things you love about me, correct?’
‘How could I not?’ He shook his head. ‘Is this how it will be? You will badger me with kisses until I give in?’
‘Would you prefer me to badger you another way?’
What could he say to that? He chuckled. She always did this to him, made him laugh. She challenged him at every turn and he wouldn’t have it any other way.
Chapter 21
Tremaine slammed his fist on the desk so hard it made his inkwell jump. ‘You want to what?’
Robert didn’t blink, just sat back, adjusted his cuffs and crossed his legs. ‘Court your daughter, and then I want to marry her.’ This was something he could handle. After all, Tremaine presented no real obstacle to him. Robert had expected this outrage and he didn’t blame Arabella’s father, not really. It didn’t mean he was enjoying this meeting.
‘Over my dead body!’
‘Really, Tremaine, that is a little extreme. You and I both know I could best you in a duel, but killing you would not put me in a good light with my bride-to-be. And she will be my bride.’
‘You conniving, snivelling—’
‘Didn’t your mother teach you that name-calling isn’t nice?’
Robert didn’t want to have to play the ace up his sleeve but if Tremaine didn’t cooperate he might well be forced to.
He had paid off the cent per cent who had been shadowing Tremaine in the last days before they had left for the Hall. He hadn’t done it for Tremaine. He’d done it for Arabella. And Isabelle. And he’d done it so Quinn wouldn’t have to. He’d wanted to keep it to himself but it seemed he may have to tell Tremaine if dear papa continued to be difficult.
‘I have put up with you because you are Shacklesbury’s friend and for the sake of peace at this wedding, but I’ll not have you sniffing around Arabella. Absolutely not,’ Tremaine protested.
‘You see, now I get the distinct impression you don’t like me. I can’t imagine why. I have been impeccably behaved... of late.’
‘You know how I feel about you. I have never hidden my dislike. After the wedding I want you gone. Far from here and my daughter.’
‘Hmm, that is disappointing,’ Robert replied. ‘I’m afraid I can’t do that. I will remove myself from your house, of course, but I will come to see your daughter, every day, all day, until you give me permission to marry her.’
Tremaine threw his hands in the air. ‘Why Arabella? Because she refused to be used by you?’
Robert smiled and rested an elbow on Tremaine’s desk. ‘No, because I love her.’
Tremaine barked with laughter and then noticed Robert was fingering one of the quills on the desk and must have realised it had not been a joke. ‘You don’t love her, Shelton. What is it that you really want?’
‘I’ve told you what I want. Do I have to compromise Arabella to help you make up your mind? At the Hall, you were prepared to make me marry her. After all, I’m not a rutting pimple-faced lad anymore, am I?’
Tremaine eyed him furiously, knowing he had been cornered by his own words. ‘You said you were only friends too. Was that a lie, like I suspected all along?’
‘No and I was honest in the fact that I have not bedded her.’
‘What if I have other plans for her?’
‘Cancel them.’
‘Cancel them? I’m afraid I can’t let you marry her if I’ve already promised her elsewhere.’
Robert felt his blood start to boil, but he kept his chair and his smile in place. ‘Is there a betrothal contract in place?’
Confused by Robert’s smile, Tremaine’s face contorted into a frown. ‘Not yet, but I have an arrangement with the fellow.’
‘Is Arabella aware of your plans?’
‘Of course not. Why would I discuss it with her?’
The answer to his question was suddenly clear. ‘Why indeed? How much do you owe him?’
‘How dare you insinuate such a thing!’
When he looked up from inspecting his nails, Tremaine was in a right state. He kept his voice tempered. He didn’t want the man to have a heart attack. ‘I dare because I know exactly the size of the hole you have dumped yourself into.’
‘You’re bluffing. And what if I refuse you permission anyway?’
Enough! It was time to make Tremaine aware he could no longer use his daughter as an excuse for his wastrel ways or a way to pay his debts. ‘I will make sure that you never get credit again. Not here. Not in London. Not anywhere. Your name will be mud. You’ll be an outcast. No one will want to touch your IOU. Your creditors will not be so patient then, I suspect. They care nothing for your investments, your harvest, scandal or the future of your heir. They only want their money and they don’t take kindly to excuses.’
‘You would ruin me?’ Tremaine boomed in outrage.
‘Quite the opposite. I wish to help you avoid ruin. In fact, I have already paid out your accounts at that nasty little gaming hell you thought no one knew you went to. You should thank me, really, for saving your kneecaps.’
Tremaine paled and his shoulders slumped. ‘You spied on me?’
‘I know... everything.’
Defeated, Tremaine fell back in his chair. ‘All right, Shelton, you leave me little choice.’
Robert stood. He had won but he wouldn’t gloat. ‘I knew you would see sense, eventually. You will find I can be a great asset to this family, not only because I’m rich but because I love your daughter.’ Robert sketched a bow and then left the room.
It had not taken a great deal of investigative prowess to find out how badly Tremaine had ensconced himself. He was so predictable, so miserably in debt, so full of pathetic pride and without a candle’s hope in hell of getting out of the muck he had made. The man was bound to drown in it if he didn’t come to his senses soon. Robert was willing to throw him a rope but he could not make the man grab it.
He no doubt blamed the girls for his misfortune but it wasn’t them; the real blame lay in the lap of Tremaine himself. Like a typical gambler, he was forever in the belief that his luck would turn, that his day would come and that his pot would turn to gold. Unfortunately, most men in such a situation were not suddenly struck with skill at the last moment and many came to a bitter end. He did not want for Arabella, Isabelle or their innocent brothers to have to mourn their father before his time.
For Arabella’s sake he was willing to ignore the fact that he disliked Tremaine immensely. He would keep an eye on his financial affairs but only to a point.
Arabella and the others were waiting for him in the parlour.
‘Well? What did he say?’ she asked.
He noticed that she had rallied her reinforcements around her in the form of most of the household. ‘I think he has conceded defeat.’ Which was sadly true. He gave her a wolfish grin and Arabella threw herself into his arms while the others all cheered.
‘Is this the behaviour of a courting woman?’ he asked jokingly of the others.
Arabella blushed most becomingly and turned to accept everyone’s hugs and congratulations.
‘Well done, Shelton.’ Quinn shook his hand and then whispered, ‘You took your time to come to your senses.’
‘Ah, but the point is, I did. Don’t worry. I shall take your teasing with good humour.’
Quinn grinned then. ‘Good, because there will be plenty of it.’
‘I would expect no less.’
Quinn clapped him on the shoulder.
Robert was then embraced by his mother. It had been a long time since he had deserved her affections. Hopefully, this would be the day that changed.
‘A walk, Miss Fleming?’ Robert offered her his arm.
Arabella looked to her mother, who nodded and smiled as she watched them.
‘I never thought I’d see the da
y that my son was in love,’ his mother cried into her handkerchief.
Lady Tremaine took both Arabella and Robert’s hands in hers. ‘It’s a splendid day indeed. Both my daughters with love matches. I am so pleased.’
Arabella felt her eyes filling with tears but this was not the time for them. ‘Thank you, Mother.’ She gave her a kiss on the cheek. ‘I am so happy you approve.’
‘I just hope he will make you happy,’ her mother whispered in her ear.
‘He will,’ she assured her.
‘We saw it a mile away, didn’t we, Amy?’ Quinn’s mother said with triumph written all over her face.
‘Indeed we did, Mother,’ Amy replied, hugging them both.
‘And I knew he was all smoke,’ Isabelle stated, smiling at Robert’s raised brow.
Arabella laughed. Everything was as it should be and she felt her sister’s happiness like it was her own, because it was. That was how it had always been between them. She hoped she would always have this bond with her sister no matter the distance between them, for Isabelle was likely to live at the Hall and Robert would no doubt insist on London.
She felt Robert tug on her arm and she smiled up at him. The look in his eyes told her all she needed to know.
He loved her.
***
Robert was already kissing her, the brute. They hadn’t even made it past the first gate before he had pulled her to him and crushed her against his chest.
‘I wish you would let me marry you tomorrow.’
His words tickled the inside of her ear. ‘Isabelle and I have always shared everything together. I want her to have her wedding day all to herself. I want her to be the centre of attention. I want to do that for her,’ Arabella explained.
‘You’re right. I was being selfish. How about the day after that?’
She laughed even though she wasn’t sure if he was truly jesting or not.
‘So, are you going to explain to me what it is that I am supposed to be doing? This courting thing, what is it going to involve?’
‘Didn’t you pay any attention to the things that Quinn was doing?’
He shook his head. ‘Not really, I was too busy trying to get you,’ he kissed her hand, ‘out of my head.’
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