She nodded. ‘Thank you. Does anyone have any idea where he might have gone?’
‘The King’s Arms,’ Amy replied, still sobbing.
Lady Shelton nodded and then came over to Arabella. Crouching down, she took Arabella’s face in her hands, forcing her to look up. ‘I’ll do what I can to help with this situation, but you know how stubborn he is. He may even refuse to see me. We are all to blame for this situation. I will do my best to explain this to him and to make him see that the means, in this case, justified the outcome.’ She kissed her on the forehead before she got up and followed Quinn out of the room.
After Lady Shelton left, Arabella let herself be led to her room and tucked into bed by Isabelle. She didn’t know what to feel, what to do, what to say. This was all her fault. Now Justin was going to duel with Robert tomorrow, and Quinn and Robert were likely never to be friends again. There was no way he would ever forgive her for giving in to Amy’s plan, and the truth was she had let herself be persuaded and she had tried to trick him into marrying her. She was guilty of the sin and she deserved whatever punishment came to her.
She was an awful person.
She had deceived him, lied to him, and used Justin to make him jealous. There was no excusing that.
She was everything that he claimed her to be. And to top it all off, what if she was with child from their lovemaking last night? She could even now be carrying his child. The last thing she wanted to do was force him into a marriage because she bore his heir, especially knowing how he felt about her at the moment. A marriage filled with hatred and contempt was not something she could live with. The alternative was just as bitter a pill to swallow.
All she could hope for was that his mother could talk some sense into him before tomorrow morning. She would never be able to live with Justin’s death on her conscience, and she suspected neither would Robert. What would become of him then? The only saving grace in this whole thing was the fact that it was not Robert’s usual style to kill his opponent; she could only hope he would keep to that, but in his present state that was not at all sure.
And then just as hideous a thought came rushing towards her. What if Robert were to be fatally injured tomorrow? What if this was what he wanted? Flashes of the story he had told her came back to her. Of him standing on the wall of the Thames, going into duels hoping to... lose. Surely he would not do something so rash?
Her heart started to thump madly as panic set in. He was going to kill himself tomorrow. There was only one thing she could do, stop the duel. She needed to think, to plan, to make sure she had her thoughts together before she talked to him tomorrow.
‘Isabelle, don’t you think you should go to Quinn? He just lost his best friend,’ Arabella said softly to her hovering sister. For the first time in her life her sister could not help her. This was something she had to do alone.
‘I can’t leave you,’ Isabelle replied, then sighed and sat down next to her on the bed. ‘I know Amy didn’t mean it, but I am so angry with her for being so careless. Look at what has happened. I am so worried about Justin and about Robert, too.’
‘That makes two of us.’ Arabella looked up at the ceiling. She had never noticed the cracks in the cornices before. There were a lot of things she had never noticed before about her home and her parents and herself.
Isabelle smoothed down a corner of the coverlet. ‘Do you think Lady Shelton can talk him out of it?’
Arabella kept looking at the cracks in the ceiling. It was far easier to look at them then at her sister’s face, which was so much like her own.
When she didn’t answer, Isabelle continued on. ‘Well, we can only hope for the best. If anyone can, I would think it would be his mother... or you.’
Her sister was too astute, but then, they were twins. She really shouldn’t be surprised to find her sister’s thoughts mirroring her own.
Isabelle patted her hand and fussed with Arabella’s bedcovers. ‘Why don’t you try and rest, I’ll come and check on you later.’ Isabelle placed a kiss on her cheek.
‘You don’t think I am horrible for going along with the plan?’
A soft sad sigh rose from her sister. ‘No. For I know how much you love him. I know you better than anyone else could imagine, so I know you never plotted maliciously. It is not in your nature. Perhaps in time Robert may also come to know this and forgive you your part in this silly scheme. If he truly loves you he may yet come back to you. The question is, will you have him back if he does?’ Then she was gone.
***
The ale tasted like poison but Robert drank it anyway. Hopefully it would kill him. He spared a thought for his poor valet. He was sure Berkeley hadn’t been expecting his master to arrive at the inn looking like he had just ridden recklessly through woods and streams and anything else that had stood in his way in his attempt to ride his horse out of hell.
No more than he expected him to burst into the room covered in leaves and twigs, roaring to raise the roof and practically tearing his clothes off as he entered. To then stand there looking like a madman and order him out.
Then again, his valet had been witness to many bizarre events during his employment. Now poor Berkeley sat in the taproom; perhaps worrying that his employer was mutilating himself, or worse, ripping up the rest of his wardrobe. He didn’t really care about Berkeley’s state of mind right now. He just wanted to drink himself into a place where nothing existed and nothing mattered. And where it didn’t bloody well hurt. He tipped the bottle up and let the ale pour down his throat.
***
Robert cracked open an eye. He could faintly hear his mother in the hall outside talking to Berkeley. How long had he been passed out? The light had dimmed, meaning it was now late afternoon.
‘I don’t know what’s got into him, my lady,’ Berkeley said to his mother.
‘Unfortunately, I do and he has good reason. How long has he been in there?’
‘A few hours. He just came into the room looking like death and ripped off his clothes and closed the door in my face.’
There was a pause. Robert lay very still, listening. She was no doubt debating whether he would be decent enough for her to enter. Good! He just wanted her to leave him be.
‘Berkeley, would you be so good as to order a hot bath and help my maid settle my belongings? I’m going to see my son.’
‘Yes, my lady, of course. He may not be fit to be seen. Should I go in there first?’
‘No. I am sure I will be fine.’ With that, she proceeded to enter his room.
Robert stared at his mother angrily. She hadn’t even knocked, just came right in and sat in a chair by the fire, giving him no chance to yell at her to leave him alone. That he only had his breeches on did not even make her blink, that he was surrounded by several empty tankards of ale and a several empty bottles of sour-tasting claret didn’t even make her raise a brow. She simply came in, sat down, folded her hands in her lap and stared right back at him.
‘You should leave, Mother dear.’ The slight slur was still present even though he had pronounced the words with utmost care.
‘Do you think this is going to help matters?’ she asked calmly, indicating the copious amounts of alcohol as yet unopened on the small table by the bed.
‘Probably not, but I thought I should give Barton at least half a chance tomorrow.’
‘You’re that good with a sword, are you?’ She held his gaze.
He gave a half-hearted laugh. ‘So it’s to be swords, is it? I should have known. Shacklesbury knows it’s my weaker weapon.’
She frowned down at him. ‘You’re really going to do this? If you stopped for half a minute you would realise what a mistake you’ve made. Lord Barton had nothing but your happiness in mind when he agreed to Amy’s suggestion. He explained this all to me while he accompanied me from the village.’
He gave her a slightly stunned look. ‘What? He accompanied you? I thought you came by yourself, because you were intrigued, or was that a lie too?’
<
br /> ‘Don’t be so silly. Barton told me of your hapless situation concerning Arabella and how stubbornly you were acting. Considering our last conversation at Bloomfield, I understood exactly what he was referring to. He was convinced that you loved Arabella, and you yourself have told me this is true. I was simply to be there in case you decided to marry hastily.’
‘She tricked me, Mother. Just like Catherine did. I’m just supposed to laugh it off as a prank?’
‘Of course not, but if you do not stop to see her side you may make the biggest mistake of your life based on your past relationship with that other woman. You give Lady Brogdan too much power and she doesn’t deserve it. Besides that, you know as well as I do that Arabella is nothing like Catherine.
‘That woman never loved you, not like Bella does. Consider what the poor girl was up against. Your stubbornness, for one. Your lack of faith in love. Your obsession with using her for your own gratification. And yet she forgave you your past transgressions against her, and others, so why can’t you do the same?’ His mother watched him bring the wine bottle to his lips.
He shook his head. ‘I never lied to her, ever. I was always honest, if not honourable, in my intentions.’
‘Always?’ There was that motherly brow again. ‘Whatever the case may be, she thinks of Barton as nothing but Amy’s cousin, a friend, and a man who was willing to help her and you,’ she explained. ‘She loves you, Robert, don’t throw that away. Forgive her for listening to the advice of others and just … love her.’
Robert stared into the flames of the fire and contemplated her words. Could he just love her and forget everything else? Could he trust her? Trust in her love? He honestly didn’t know if he could. He loved her more than he had ever felt it was possible to love someone. His heart was throbbing with a dull pain that felt like death’s handgrip. Had he acted hastily? Perhaps, but anger and agony had a way of muddling the brain. He had vowed never to fall prey to a manipulating, scheming woman again, never to fall for such a woman’s tricks, never to fall for such a woman period, but somehow she had gotten through his defences. He knew he loved her because nothing else could ever hurt this bad. Nothing else could make him feel like crying like a babe. Make him want to die from the despair that he felt. No. He didn’t want to make the same mistakes again.
‘I want to forgive her, Mother, I really do,’ he finally said. ‘I just don’t know if I can right now.’
‘I understand.’ His mother came and knelt next to him. She hugged him. ‘You need time. Time to understand your feelings, your hurt and your love for Bella. Just don’t take too long.’
‘What happened to me, Mother?’
She sighed. ‘You just lost your way, my love. We all do sometimes. What is important is that you know who you are now no matter how difficult it may be to face.
‘Confess my sins and ask for forgiveness from the ton? I doubt they will believe I have changed.’
‘They don’t have to. You have to. Show them by your actions. Show Arabella by proving to her she made the right choice in giving her heart to you.’
‘That’s just it. I don’t deserve her. I’m a scoundrel.’
‘Were a scoundrel. And yet you have her love anyway. The heart is a curious thing. It has the ability to sees things that the eyes do not.’
‘It hurts so bad, Mother. It hurts so damn much,’ he whispered, turning into her arms and burying his face in her skirts
‘I know, darling, I know. Love does hurt sometimes, I’m afraid. But it’s also the one thing worth fighting for above all else.’
Chapter 26
The sound of hooves pounding on cobbles echoed like a cacophony of gunfire in the stable yard, jerking Arabella out of her brief slumber. She’d set herself up in the window seat in her father’s study well before dawn, having given up all hope of sleep.
Her plan had been to wait until she saw Justin, Quinn and John arrive at the stables and then creep down so she could overhear where the duel was to take place, wait for them to leave and then follow. Instead they were already halfway down the drive. She was lucky enough to be able to see them take the left fork in the road towards the village.
Scrambling off her perch, she ran down to the stable yard clutching her cape. After an argument with the head groom over which mount she could take, the poor man saddled her father’s hunter and helped her into the saddle. Immediately Arabella realised the groom had been right. This horse was far too headstrong and skittish for her, but her own mare was in the top paddock and would take too long to fetch and saddle.
She had to go. Now.
She urged the horse into a gallop and squinted against the icy rain that stung her exposed face and pelted her body. She was drenched through in seconds but still she urged the horse on. Fear for Robert and Justin ran through her mind. If either one of them was hurt or killed, it would be her fault. She had already been delayed too long.
The horse unexpectedly veered to the left and she nearly slid out of the saddle. She was not used to riding astride and felt oddly off balance. She must keep her focus. Up ahead the road became a quagmire but she could see the freshly turned mud and knew they had taken the path to the right. Bushes and branches slapped at her and the horse snorted and whinnied his dislike at being forced to run under such conditions. Hope and fear clashed within her as lightning flashed and thunder clapped around her. This was madness, but so was her love for Robert. Would she be able to stop the duel in time?
***
Dawn came and with it the rain, a dark deluge that soon made the roads muddy and dangerous to navigate. Quinn shivered under his greatcoat and peered through the rain at Barton who was nervously handling the reins on his horse. Robert stayed out of sight but near enough to hear the exchange.
‘Do you think he’s going to show?’ Justin asked, as his horse shifted beneath him trying to get a firmer footing in the sludge.
‘He’s as mad as us if he does.’
‘What am I doing here, Quinn? I was trying to help the fool.’
‘We all know that, Justin, but as I explained last night, as much as you and Amy were trying to help, the nature of the plan hit a very raw nerve and brought back memories for Shelton that not even I can fully comprehend. So we will honour this challenge and hope we can work this out with Shelton before he draws his sword.’
‘No one can come to an acceptable understanding with an idiot. If he can’t tell the difference between what happened with Lady Brogdan and what happened here, there is no hope for him.’
Thunder rumbled around them, followed by the brief lighting of the sky. He should be back at the house, warm and dry and in the arms of his fiancée. Rain dribbled into his boot to remind him he was far from where he ought to be. But this was his fault. And now he had to do what he had to do.
‘I swear, Quinn, if I live through this. I’m going to marry Bella myself.’
Quinn snorted. ‘Oh, very funny. This situation is ridiculous enough without this kind of talk.’
Barton frowned. ‘I’m serious. What will happen to her if he does not come to his senses? He’s no doubt had her and I will need a wife, eventually. In any case I like her well enough to marry her despite her liaison with Shelton.’
Quinn raised a brow. ‘You like her well enough?’
‘If he’s too brainless to realise what he is throwing away, why shouldn’t I?’ Justin said in a tone that sounded a little defensive to him.
‘Tell me you have not fallen in love with her. That it was an act and nothing more.’
‘I’m not as reprehensible as that. I did admire her from our very first meeting but it was not until later that my feelings for her became more... intense. It is the least I can do if he passes her over. I can’t just leave her to bear the scandal, can I?’
Quinn just shook his head. ‘This is real life, Justin, not one of your poems. If you marry her you will both be miserable. You may think you are falling in love with her but she will never be able to return that love. For bette
r or worse she loves Shelton. Do you understand what I am saying?’
Robert turned his horse around. He ground his teeth. Time to put an end to all of this. He rode back down the track and then cantered back down the other road back towards the clearing where the others waited.
‘Here he comes,’ John yelled from his post by the road. ‘And he’s alone.’
***
Robert arrived at the small clearing off the side of the road and looked at the three sodden figures sitting on their sodden mounts before him. He’d made them wait on purpose, wanting them to be soaked through by the time he got there. And so they were, as wet and miserable as he.
‘Where is your second, Shelton?’ Snowden asked.
‘I don’t have one. My usual second and I are not talking at present.’ He looked calmly over at Quinn. Shacklesbury raised a brow in return. He would have to deal with Quinn later; Barton had to be dealt with first.
Snowden looked hard at Shelton and then turned towards Justin, who shrugged.
‘We cannot continue without one, Shelton. You of all men should know that.’
‘Thank you for stating the obvious, Snowden,’ Robert replied. ‘The weather is not exactly conducive to either effective swordplay or accurate pistols.’
Barton threw his hands up. ‘Then what do you suggest, Shelton? It is up to you as challenger to decide.’ Poor Barton sounded upset and impatient. Excellent.
‘Do not explain the rules of duelling to me, Barton.’ Robert gave him a cold stare, even though it was raining far too hard now to see the man’s features clearly.
John urged his mount forward. ‘Shelton, I think that perhaps you and I should go back to your lodgings and talk. As Barton’s second I can then convey your final decision to him on my return.’
Robert nodded. ‘I agree. Send Barton back with Shacklesbury and then follow me. The road has become slippery and I have plotted out the best path back.’
John agreed, but before any of the men said another word, they all turned towards the road at the sound of a horse whinnying high in a distressed fashion.
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