by Tricia Goyer
“Passing you into the arms of another was an act of love greater than I could do in my own strength. God was with me.” Grace let out a sigh. “God is with me still.”
Lydia nodded even as her heart filled to overflowing. How had she been chosen to receive such an amazing gift—not one but two mothers who loved the Lord and sought and followed Him?
“Darkness is a fact of life on this earth. I’ve had many emotions over the years; I won’t tell you I haven’t. I’ve been angry at God at times—first losing my husband and then losing you. I was mad at Him for not protecting me from that man. And I was mad at myself. I vas the one who approached that man, after all. Any way to blame myself, I did. I was innocent, but I didn’t feel that way.”
“Oh, Grace.”
Grace held up a hand, and Lydia knew. Grace didn’t want her sympathy. Grace wanted to be heard. “I didn’t believe anything would be all right again. I felt so empty after you left. I wanted to keep you, to raise you, but I loved you too much for that. I couldn’t have loved you more, daughter. I hope you see that.”
Lydia nodded, realizing Gideon was right. “I do see that, Grace. I know the truth now…and I’ve never felt so whole.”
The truth was like water seeping into parched ground. Lydia’s soul soaked up Grace’s words. How long had she been wanting to hear them?
“When we give God our problems and bitterness, He is faithful,” Grace said. “God doesn’t promise to keep us from all the troubles in this world, but when trouble comes He will be with us. My husband—God rest his soul—would remind me of that. When he knew he wasn’t going to make it, and that the cancer would prevail, Sam told me he was going…but that God never would leave me. Sam told me to lean into God as I leaned into him all those years. It’s something I’ve done, and it’s the one thing that got me through—”
Grace’s words were interrupted then by the sound of voices. “What’s that?” Lydia asked, rising and moving to the window.
“It’s a gathering for you, Lydia. An ice-cream social. There are so many from town—from our family—who wanted to welcome you home.”
Is this where I belong, Lord? Me and my father?
CHAPTER
36
Lydia forgot how tired she was when she saw the gathering of people at her brother Matthew’s house next door. She lost track of names beyond that of her mother and brothers. She received so many hugs that she had to readjust her kapp twice.
She lost a game of horseshoes to her two twin nieces, Emily and Katie—neither of whom she could tell apart. She also ate her fill of ice cream and tried to burn some of it off by pushing numerous children from their community on the tire swing.
She was just about to get off her feet and spend time sitting near Grace when Isaac approached.
“Lydia.” Concern was on his face. “There is someone here to see you. Said he came a long way.”
Gideon?
Her breath stilled, Lydia turned, following Isaac’s gaze. She knew she should explain who Gideon was, but she couldn’t think. Instead she hurried to the edge of the yard where he stood.
“Gideon? What are you doing here?”
“Vell, I came to deliver a message. Flew in a jet plane to get here too, if you can imagine that. The bishop said it seemed like the only right thing to do, considering the situation.” He had a serious look on his face, but Lydia was happy to see that the anger was gone.
“I have to tell you, Gideon. I’m sorry I hid the truth. And you were right: my motives weren’t completely pure. I did want the job, a book, and…” She let her words trailed off. “I wanted you.”
She offered a sad grin. “But God used that in a way to bring me to Him. Even when I was thinking of me, soon He became the most important part. If I could do it over I would have told you everything. I would have admitted my desire for the teaching position sooner. I would have made you read every word the moment I wrote it.”
“I know, Lydia. I shouldn’t have focused so much on the ‘why.’ I should have concentrated on the woman you became. Sometimes people hide the truth because they’re afraid of causing pain, but sometimes…well, what they set out for is different than what they get. Truth does that.” Gideon’s gaze narrowed. “Now, will you let me share my message?”
Worry rushed over her again at his words and the serious look on his face. What could be so important that he’d come all this way?
“A message? Is everyone all right? Is it Dat?”
“Your dat is fine, but I’m supposed to give you this.” Gideon reached into his pocket and pulled out her cell phone, handing it to her. He attempted to hide a smile, but he wasn’t doing a very good job.
“You forgot this,” he said.
“Ja, I know.” She frowned and looked down at the phone. It was turned on and the battery was fully charged. The notification said there was a voicemail. She shrugged and checked it.
Lydia, this is Bonnie, and I need to apologize. I messed up and I’m certain you believe I’ve ruined your life. I didn’t understand your text. I thought you were sending your manuscript to be submitted to the publisher. I went to West Kootenai and explained everything. Your friends are great. Gideon’s a keeper. But I’m getting ahead of myself. Because I need to ask your forgiveness too. Because I did something else you might not forgive me for. I let the others read the manuscript. I only had one copy but they passed it around. Edgar said to tell you he smiles more than you said he did. I believe Gideon has a note from the others. Don’t hate me.
Lydia hung up and looked up at Gideon. “Do you have a note too?” she dared to ask. He nodded and reached into his pocket to hand her a folded square of paper. She unfolded it and saw that it was written in a neat handwriting. Marianna’s signature was first, but then dozens of others followed it. Annie, Susan, David, Julia, Edgar…and many more. Even Ellie’s name was written in scribbly script at the bottom.
Laughter spilled from Lydia’s lips, followed by tears of longing. “Ellie’s practicing her letters.” She glanced up at him. “What is this?”
Gideon smiled and nodded to the paper. “Jest read.”
Dear Lydia,
We hope this letter finds you well. Yer dat told us where you’d gone and we’re keeping you in our prayers. I filled in for school, and though I’m sure I’m doing fine all the children miss you and send you love. They can’t wait for you to return. They’ll probably be upset with me for saying this, but they talk about you like Englisch children speak of rock stars. After all, they’ve never known someone famous. But I’m getting ahead of myself.
I have to admit I was shocked and hurt by the arrival of that publisher. To hear that you’d been writing about us…We all felt betrayed. Mem later told me she went to confront you. Annie said the same. They both said they were glad you were sleeping at the time. They were thankful for the gut Lord for keeping their words where they belonged—in their mind, not on the tip of the tongue.
We heard you left Sunday morning. Your dat gave us your note apologizing on leaving without setting up a teacher first. We called a special meeting after church service. Many were mad, angry. We felt we’d been fooled. That’s when an unexpected visitor showed up.
Bonnie caught a special flight from Mexico to Kalispell. I can’t even imagine such a thing. She’d come to apologize to you…and to clear the air. She said you sounded distraught on your messages, and she felt horrible for the miscommunication. She also told us that from what she’d read she believed you truly had a change of heart and had returned to the Amish with pure motives. She let Gideon read a few parts first. Then we thought it would be wise to let our bishop read your words too.
His wife, Katie, sat beside him while he read, and when we noticed tears in their eyes we demanded we know what was there. Elton read us a few parts aloud—about the first time you read a note from the Promise Box and what God’s promises meant to you. Not one cheek stayed dry that moment. All of us rejoiced at God’s gut transformation.
One man
didn’t seem too happy about the pages being read. Micah rose and we thought he was leaving the room, but he walked to Gideon instead and offered an apology. After that Gideon stood and told us the story about Mose’s death. He confessed to us that his words to you had been unkind right before you left, and he wept and questioned how he’d accused you when he’d been freed from so much. Only a few of those who’d been around awhile knew about the words on the tombstone, and all of us agreed that part of the story needed to be written too. So you have more work to do.
All that to say that we understand, Lydia, that you wrote the story in the notebook for yourself, Gideon, and your dat. But, dear friend, would you honor us by sharing your story with the world…and our part in it? The lady from New York said she is still interested. Edgar was the one who went to the guest cottage where she was staying and asked. He also asked if the book would make enough money for the publishing company to be able to donate enough to pay for an indoor bathroom and running water in the school. She said she believed it would.
Lydia reread Marianna’s signature and all the others again too. She chuckled. She couldn’t help it. Joy flooded over her. She looked to Gideon and thought for a moment that his smile was even larger than hers.
She turned the piece of paper over, expecting there would be more to the letter on the other side. Instead the page was blank.
Lydia’s forehead wrinkled. “I don’t understand.”
“That’s because I asked Marianna to stop there. I told her I wanted to fill you in on the rest.”
“Ja, what’s that?”
“It’s time to go back now, Lydia.”
“To West Kootenai?”
“Ja, it’s time to come home. There’s something else too.” Gideon sank to one knee.
Lydia gasped. “What are you doing?”
“Edgar told me this is how the Englisch do it. And since you like stories I thought I’d share one.”
“A-all right.”
Cheers rose up from behind her, and Lydia glanced back over her shoulder. The eyes of all the guests at the ice-cream social were fixed on her. It only seemed right that her family—her family—should be part of this.
Lydia turned back around and offered a smile to the man she loved with all her heart.
Gideon cleared his throat and peered up at her with emotion in his dark eyes. “You know, Lydia. I’m not from Montana. I went for hunting. I wanted to take home some antlers and have a gut story to tell.”
Despite her nervous excitement, Lydia chuckled. “Well, you didn’t get what you bargained for, did you?”
“Ne, I didn’t get what I bargained for. I got better than that. For all my life I just wanted to be noticed. I wanted to belong. Now I realize where my true home is.”
“Where’s that?”
“Because of Jesus my eternal home is with my Father God. But on this earth, as far as I’m concerned, home is where you are.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying, if you still have the first Saturday in December free, I’d like to occupy your time that day by making you my wife.”
Lydia tapped the side of her cheek. “Well, I’ll have to check my schedule…but I think I’m free.”
Free. The word echoed in her thoughts. What had that Scripture said: “The truth will set you free”? She hadn’t understood that a few months ago. To her, freedom had been setting off on her own path, living by her own rules, plotting her own course. But true freedom was not only turning your life over to God and letting Him have control, but also looking back and seeing His path—seeing where He’d been and what He’d already done.
True freedom: it was something inside. Something beautiful.
What had Gideon said once? A free horse wasn’t one that roamed the hills. A free horse was one that submitted to his master in trust and understanding. She’d never felt freer than at that moment—not even when she’d packed a bag and headed into the Englisch world.
Lydia opened her arms. Gideon stood and swept her up in his embrace. He placed the softest kiss on her lips, and then he pulled back.
“Will you promise to love me…even when I mess up? Even when I don’t always do the right things, say the right things?” he asked.
“Ja.” Lydia nodded. “Because I know it’s in those hard times that God will use the pain to mold us into the people He’s designed us to be. People who can love, who can forgive, and who can point others to freedom.” Lydia sighed. “And…the truth is, Gideon, you are jest as handsome when you’re angry as when you’re happy with me.”
Gideon chuckled. “And you’re jest as beautiful when you’re seeking an answer as when you’ve found one. And I have a feeling on this earth there will be plenty of both. And also enough of God’s grace to lead the way.”
“Ja.” Lydia smiled. “I agree. And to you, Gideon, I make a promise: that I will always tell you the truth from now on. Unless you ask about who ate the last piece of pie—then there are no guarantees.”
Gideon kissed her once again. “Is that a promise?”
“Ja, it’s a promise…one I’ll write down and slip inside Mem’s Promise Box.”
“Or write in a book?” Gideon cocked an eyebrow.
“Or write in a book.” Lydia smiled. “If that’s what the good Lord wants. But we’ll just have to wait and see.”
“Just as long as you write me as dashing and handsome.” He smirked.
“I have no reservations about that.” She snuggled her cheek into his neck. “Then everyone will know what a gut God we really have. One who brings hope out of pain and love. Well…” She looked up at him. “One who can introduce love on a beautiful summer day when two ordinary people least expect it. And One who can remind us that some things are worth living for.”
“I like that, Lydia.” Love radiated from his gaze. “I like that a lot.”
Lydia pulled back and took his hand. “Now come and meet my mother. Oh yes, and my brothers too. I’m sure they’ll put you to the test to see if you’re the man for their little sister.”
“I won’t mind.” Gideon chuckled and hurried forward, leading the way. “And for some reason I think the prayer of a young boy is being answered. A prayer he prayed as he gazed down at his baby sister.”
Lydia glanced up and met Matthew’s gaze. “Ja, Gideon. I think yer right.” The tears in her eyes matched those of her brothers. “And you know it’s a gut God to design something like that. A gut God indeed.”
NOTE FROM EDGAR
I almost missed the wedding, but it’s the publisher’s fault. She arrived with an updated manuscript and asked me to be the first to review it. Lydia did a good job, but I do smile more than she said. I also like how she told the conversation between me and Gideon when I told him about Mose’s death. It’s a good writer who can do that—seeing as she wasn’t there.
Back to the fact that I almost missed the wedding. I was still sitting at the store counter when I saw the buggy driving by. Lydia’s dat was driving, with Lydia in the seat. I could see her front teeth from all the way in the store because her smile was so big. Blue did a fine job being hitched up too. Fine indeed. I always knew there was a good horse under all that wild.
I told the publisher that the only thing I’m worried about is that too many folks might come this way. We’re real folks in this part, you know, and the girls in the kitchen—well, they can only make so many pies.
Oh, I made the publisher promise something else: that she’d keep the name for Lydia’s book. The Promise Box. I like that. Much better than An Amish Homecoming—no offense. And I have a feeling Ada Mae would like that too.
Yes, Ada Mae, I can picture your smile too. Bigger than the Montana sky as you see what God did with your girl. He’s good about keeping His promises like that. But of course, that’s something you already knew.
Edgar
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
1. Lydia Wyse returns to the Amish community of West Kootenai, Montana, after the death of her mother. H
ow does Lydia look at the community differently when she returns this time?
2. Gideon Hooley is an Amish bachelor who has traveled to Montana to hunt in the fall. While he is there he starts working with a horse named Blue. How are Gideon and Blue similar?
3. The Promise Box is set in a small Amish community in Northwestern Montana. What did you like best about the setting?
4. Lydia is Englisch when she comes to town. Why did she leave the Amish? What did she gain by being part of the Englisch community? What did she lose when she left the Amish?
5. Gideon returned to Montana to learn more of his past. Do you think his parents did the right thing by hiding the truth? Why or why not?
6. What new situations in her life made Lydia consider returning to the Amish?
7. How are Lydia’s eyes opened once she starts reading notes and Scripture verses from Mem’s Promise Box?
8. What did you learn about an Amish person’s baptism into the church through Lydia’s experience?
9. Gideon and Lydia had a quick attraction to each other. What character qualities drew the other?
10. Lydia became involved with the Amish community through interaction with the women and through teaching school. What do you like the most about Amish communities?
11. What do you think is the underlying theme of The Promise Box? How does this theme play out in the lives of the main characters of the novel?
12. At the end of the novel Gideon discovers a truth in the graveyard. Why did this gift mean so much to him?
13. When the publisher arrived, the whole community believed the worst about Lydia. How did their rejection lead her to discovering ultimate truth?
14. At the end of the book Lydia meets the family she never knew. How do you think that meeting impacted her from that point on?