Too Cold To Love

by Doris O'Connor

  Marco's firm arm around her waist spun her back around, and he kissed away her tears with such tenderness it took her breath away, causing that rabbit inside her chest to go ballistic.

  "Ach, look at ye three, it warms the cockles of ma wee heart it does for sure. Oh and before I forget, there was a phone call for ye, Elise, said she was ye sister and not to worry she was okay."

  The grip on her arm tightened for just an instant before Marco handed Mimi to Agnes.

  "Take Mimi to the kitchen, Agnes. We'll be there in a minute."

  Elise braced herself for the storm which never came. Instead he watched her with a small smile on his face, He took her hand and steered her towards his office.

  He picked up the phone on his desk and wordlessly handed her the receiver, after dialing and waiting for a response.

  "It's okay, cara mia. Talk to Jemima. I think you need to." He left her staring at his retreating back in disbelief. Whatever had gotten into him?

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  "Are you sure you don't want me to keep Mimi here, Agnes?" Elise asked for the second time this morning earning herself one of the housekeeper's famous eye rolls.

  "Ah balderdash, yae just enjoy the peace an' quiet fer five minutes. Lord knows there's been enough going on over the last few days. The wee lass loves that market, and I'll have her back before yae know it."

  Elise hugged Mimi, and Agnes bundled her out of the door.

  "Ciao, Mamma."

  Elise blinked back tears. Every time the little angel called her Mamma, Elise's heart skipped a few beats. It was a small miracle she hadn't suffered cardiac failure in fact, with all the shocks to the system her poor ticker had had to contend with lately.

  And all of them caused by Marco. Thoughts of her husband brought a wondering smile to Elise's lips. She had no idea what had gotten into him since that night at Mamma G's, and she was too frightened of rejection to allow herself to read too much into it, but he was a changed man.

  She still couldn't believe his easy acceptance of her contact with Jemima. A huge weight had lifted off her shoulders, knowing that her twin was safe. But what had completely floored her had been Marco's casual suggestion that perhaps they could meet up with Jemima, once the whole custody thing was over and done with. He'd mentioned it over breakfast yesterday. He'd peered at her over his financial times, to all intents and purposes as though he didn't care either way, but he hadn't been able to hide the white knuckled grip on the paper waiting for her reply.

  Elise blushed, remembering how she had thrown herself at him, sending that paper flying. Had it not been for Agnes and Mimi, well, he wouldn't have made it to work that morning.

  Were it not for the custody hearing looming over them, life would be pretty much perfect right now. Marco played it down whenever Elise mentioned it, but she couldn't help but worry. She would never forgive herself if Rosie's accident would work against them. The visit from social services had been harrowing to say the least.

  Elise had been so nervous; she didn't manage to get her words out properly. Ms. Holmes had been perfectly amiable and professional, but her constant scribbling on her notepad had set Elise's teeth on edge. By the time Marco had managed to come home from work, her nerves had been shot to pieces. She'd never been more grateful for his quiet strength behind her when Ms. Holmes tried to quiz her in great detail about Rosie's accident.

  "I fail to see why you have to make my wife relive this all. You have my solicitor's statement, plus the inquest report which states all the facts. There really isn't any more to say on it, and as Elise was completely cleared of all charges this whole thing is ludicrous."

  "There has been a complaint made, Mr. Giovanni, and we would be failing in our duties if we didn't follow it up."

  "A complaint made by my ex-wife who has never shown the slightest interest in her daughter. I would suggest you look into her background and find out why Mimi is afraid of the woman who gave birth to her, instead of harassing the only true mother my daughter has ever known."

  "I can assure you, Mr. Giovanni, we are investigating all parties involved."

  His hand had tightened on hers, and he'd been about to say something else when Elise finally found her voice. "It's okay, Marco. I don't mind, really. Ask whatever you need to, Ms. Holmes, and I will answer it as best I can."

  "Angelo mio, you do not have to do this." Marco's voice had held a fierce edge, the grip on her hand almost painful. Elise had forced a smile for him.

  "Yes, I do, Marco. It’s okay, really."

  There had been a small smile on Ms. Holmes face watching the exchange between them, followed by more furious scribbling. When Marco had finally escorted the woman out, Elise had barely made it to the toilet before losing the entire contents of her stomach.

  When she'd made it out of the downstairs toilet on shaky legs Marco had been waiting for her. Every line of his body had screamed his agitation as his blue eyes searched her face.

  "You seem to be doing that a lot lately. Are you sure you're okay? Perhaps we ought to get you seen by a doctor."

  "It's ok, Marco, there's nothing wrong with me, well nothing that won't sort itself out soon enough. It's just…"

  A strangled sound had come from Marco. He'd grabbed her into a fierce hug, his stunned voice murmuring in Italian in her ear. Elise winced, remembering that scene, even now.

  Oh you stupid, stupid girl!

  "Urm Marco, listen to me, let me go. It's not what you think."

  Marco had released her slowly. His expression had become wary and guarded as he'd crossed his arms over his chest. The hopeful light in his eyes had died down slowly with every one of her next words.

  "I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. I didn't mean to make you think that I was, well, you know…"

  Marco had taken a step away from her with a grim smile.

  "Don't worry. I'm not foolish enough to think that. I'm damaged goods after all."

  The barely concealed hurt in his voice had sliced right through Elise's tender heart. She would never know how she'd managed to stop herself from reaching out to him, but his whole body language had screamed don't! So she'd made herself smile instead.

  "I get like this when I'm stressed, that's all. I'll be glad when the custody thing is over."

  He'd drawn her back into a hug. "So will I, cara mia, so will I." He'd kissed her on the nose and walked away from her. The tight set of his shoulders had made Elise want to cry at the injustice of it all.

  Why could life not be simple? Was that too much to ask? Apparently it was. At some point they would have to discuss the whole issue of kids. It clearly weighed heavily on Marco, and Elise had no idea what to do about it. He was such a complicated man. She hadn't a snowball's chance in hell of understanding him.

  Take the time he caught her reading the Italian phrase book she bought in an effort to decipher some of the new expressions he seemed to use for her.

  Her heart had been beating a little faster when she had found the definitions. Surely, he couldn't be calling her his angel, his love? And if that was really what they meant, did that mean?

  "What has you so engrossed, pasticcino?"

  She'd spun around hiding the book behind her back, feeling extremely foolish doing so.

  "Oh nothing.I was just coming to find Mimi."

  He'd smiled at her, his eyes narrowing. "Mimi is fine with Agnes helping her make lunch. What are you hiding?" And before she could stop him he'd reached behind her taking the book out of her hands.

  Elise hadn't known where to put herself at the unreadable look he gave her.

  "How long have you had this?"

  "Urm, not long. I just thought I should probably learn some Italian being that you want Mimi to be bilingual."

  She knew her cheeks had been flaming when he'd looked at the earmarked page. His voice hadn't been quite steady when he'd handed it back to her

  "If you want to learn, I'll teach you."

  His smile hadn't reached his eyes when he gla
nced at her.

  "You can't believe anything in these phrasebooks. Whoever writes them has a rudimentary grasp of the language at best." He'd thrown the thing in the bin by his desk. Elise could have sworn there was a faint blush on his cheeks. Before she could quiz him further, Mimi had bounded in, and the moment had been lost.

  It had given her silly little heart such foolish hope though.

  Surely he must care her for a little? It had been on the tip of her tongue so many times to tell him that she loved him. Every time she had stopped herself, too frightened of what his reaction would be. He didn't believe in love, he'd said; it didn't exist. She remembered that conversation on their honeymoon all too well, and she was not ready to open that particular can of worms. If she could get her hands on that Jennifer, she would give her a piece of her mind, she really would! Damn the woman for hurting him so much that he was afraid to trust anyone. Even if she did declare her love for him, he would never believe her. No, far better to just stay as they were.

  A sound in the garden broke through the argument she was having with herself. It was too early for Agnes and Mimi to be back. Had Marco come home for lunch?

  The smile on her lips froze when she turned round and saw Jennifer stroll through the French doors into the kitchen as though her thoughts had just conjured the woman out of nowhere.

  "What the hell are you doing here, and how did you get in?" Elise asked.

  "Don't get your knickers in a twist. I'm here to offer you a deal."

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Marco pulled up outside his house and frowned at the unknown car. They weren't expecting visitors today as far as he knew. And why was the garden gate open? That should be locked. He heard the raised voices the minute he opened his car door.

  "Give me the key you used to get in here, Jennifer, and get the hell out of my house before I call the police. You have five seconds!"

  Okay, that explained the car and the open gate but not what that bitch was doing here. When he turned the corner, it looked as though his pasticcino had matters in hand. Her eyes blazed fire, her face was flushed, one hand on her hip, the other was holding a – no she couldn't be – but yes, that was definitely Agnes's cast iron frying pan she was wielding at Jennifer. His bitch of an ex-wife took a step backwards, her hands up in surrender.

  Despite the surreal situation Marco's lips twitched, and he ducked behind one of the ferns to watch the ensuing spectacle.

  He would intervene if he had to, but Hell hath no fury like Elise sprang to mind. She looked absolutely gorgeous in her anger, and he watched his wife defend what's hers in stunned admiration.

  "Oh do be serious. You wouldn't dare hit me with that? How would that look in the custody hearing?" Nonetheless, Marco saw her take another step back, and she sounded far from confident.

  "Key, Jennifer, now. Then I'll put this down."

  Jennifer threw the key at Elise, and Marco ground his teeth. Lucky for her that hadn't hit Elise.

  "How very mature of you, Jennifer. Now get out!"

  "I don't think so. Like I said I came here to offer you a deal."

  Elise put the frying pan down on the wooden patio table and shook her head at Jennifer.

  "Why on earth would I be interested in any deal you have to offer? Just get out. If Marco finds you here I dread to think what he'd do. You've done enough damage to him and Mimi. I won't let you do anymore. They are better off without you."

  "La de da de da. Listen to yourself. Don't you know there are two sides to every story? Marco is a cold fish who was only interested in me as a brood mare. Oh don't look so surprised. From the minute we got married he wanted to start a family. All the tests he put me through and in the end it was him, of course. How laughable is that."

  "I fail to see what's funny about this, Jennifer. Surely it's only natural for him to want a family. It's what most people do when they get married."

  Marco flinched at the emotion behind those words. What wouldn't he give to be most people? Trust that bitch to twist his intentions.

  "Yes, well." Jennifer's brittle laugh sent his teeth on edge. She flicked an imaginary speck of dust off her designer suit, and then ran a disparaging look over Elise's simple jeans and short sleeved blouse. "I was never most people. I never wanted children. I married Marco because he wouldn't sleep with me otherwise. I should have known then what he was like. I thought I was pregnant at the time, so he was my knight in shining armour."

  Elise's outraged gasp wrapped itself around the old wound, and Marco was surprised to note it didn't hurt anymore.

  "His money helped, of course, and for a while it was quite flattering to have all his attention, but he had to go all possessive on me. I couldn't even look at another man without him getting jealous, and all that devotion got old really quickly."

  "You absolute monster! You had it all, Marco and Mimi, and you just threw it all away. Just get the hell away from me before I forget myself and do hit you with that frying pan."

  Elise's voice trembled with emotion, and Marco curled his toes with the effort it took to not intervene.

  "Tsk, tsk, temper, Elise. Tell me, does Marco know you're besotted with him?"

  "I, urm, that's none of your business, Jennifer."

  All the colour drained out of Elise's face, and Marco held his breath waiting for her response. Was she in love with him? Really? But she couldn't be. She was only with him for Mimi, wasn't she? Had he got this all wrong, again?

  Well, it wouldn't be the first time, Einstein.

  Jennifer's next words made him wince.

  "Oh my God, I'm right, aren't I? You're in love with him. Oh that's priceless. Shame he only married you to get rid of me, eh, and I have no intention of going away, unless…"

  "What will it take to get rid of you?"

  Marco breathed a sigh of relief when some colour returned to Elise's face, even if her voice was wobbly and made him want to run over there and kiss the frown lines off her face.

  Jennifer's next words froze him in place however.

  "I knew you'd see sense. It's quite simple really. I'll drop my fight for custody if you leave Marco."

  "What? Why would you want me to do that? You're insane."

  Jennifer smirked. "Oh, I have my reasons."

  "You're missing his money in other words, you mean. I know he's stopped your allowance. God knows why he gave it to you in the first place. It's not as though you needed it for Mimi."

  Jennifer's evil laugh rang round the garden.

  "What can I say? The fool can't resist me. He's always been in love with me, and I only have to snap my fingers and he'll come crawling back."

  "I don't think so, Jennifer. He doesn't love you." Elise's voice dropped to an anguished whisper. "You've done a good job of curing him from believing in love at all. Just go away. I really don't see what you hope to achieve here. He'll never take you back or let you near Mimi, and I will not break Mimi's heart by leaving her, and I…I can't leave Marco. He may not love me, but I'll settle for what I can get."

  "Spare me the sentiments. That's pathetic, and what is lover-boy going say when I tell him you're a murderer!"

  "How dare you? Rosie was an accident, and besides Marco knows all about her, so you can just take a running jump."

  Jennifer's mask dropped then.

  "He can't, I mean, he would never have… he would never let you near Mimi after that."

  Marco stepped out from behind that fern, his eyes only on Elise. He smiled at the mixture of relief and surprise on her face when she spotted him.

  "Seems to me, you don't know me very well at all, Jennifer."

  ****

  Elise's knees turned to jelly seeing Marco come towards her. His eyes locked with hers as though he was looking right down into her soul. He pulled her into his hard frame, and his voice showed his amusement.

  "Hey, angelo mio, remind me never to cross you when there's a frying pan around."

  "How long have you been there?" Elise had to ask.


  Oh no, how much of this had he heard?

  "Long enough, cara mia, long enough."

  "Oh, how touching."

  Jennifer's sarcastic and slightly panicky voice made Elise look back at her. Marco's arms tightened around her a bit more when he addressed his ex-wife.

  "Are you still here, Jennifer? Your plan didn't work, so get lost already."

  Tension radiated off him. He purposefully turned his back on Jennifer, and his eyes once again locked with hers. She was dimly aware of Jennifer rambling on in the back ground, over the rushing in her ear, and that crazy rabbit which seemed to have taken up residence in her chest again.

  "Oh you'd like that, wouldn't you? But you can't get rid of me that easily. I can make your life very difficult for you. I'll fight you every step of the way. Damn it, are you listening to me, Marco?"

  Marco was still looking at Elise, as though he had never seen her before. She wasn't at all sure her legs would be able to do their job, were it not for Marco holding her so tightly.

  "Oh this is ridiculous. You're making me feel sick. Do you honestly think she's going to stay with you? The woman was a nanny, for God's sake. She isn't going to settle for a man who's firing blanks. I told you before, Marco; no woman ever would."

  That got through to Elise's mush for brains, that being looked at as though she was the most precious thing ever, had reduced them to. Oh the nerve of that sorry excuse for a woman. Her heart clenched painfully seeing Marco stood stock still, his eyes shut, that awful dejected slump back to his shoulders, and Elise saw red.

  "How dare you, Jennifer. Enough! Do you not have an ounce of compassion in your body? Some of us are not as shallow as you. For heaven's sake, anyone can use their dick to impregnate someone. Big woohoo. That's not what makes you a man, much less a dad. Sticking around and fighting for those you love, no matter what happens is what does that. Marco is a brilliant daddy to Mimi, and we are very lucky to have him. Now get the fuck out!"