Family Drama 3-in-1 Box Set: String Bridge, The Book, Bitter Like Orange Peel

by Jessica Bell

  “I want to make trees.” That was me, saying it rool loud so Mrs Haydon can hear and would stop hearing lies from Bianca and come over to me. Now she comes over, but she’s got grumpy lines on her head and says in her witchy voice that I can make trees if I want to.

  “But trees are green, stupid. There’s no green!” That’s me yelling again. I don’t think I should be yelling at Mrs Haydon. My mummy tolded me that I should respect Mrs Haydon, and that means to speak nicely. Mrs Haydon’s eyes go all googly and shiny and she puts her hands on her hips and her lip does that thing like it did with Daddy’s like it’s being pulled by a string.

  “Apologize for your foul use of language and your inappropriate tone, young lady, or I’ll take you straight up to the Princpal’s office. Would you like to go to the Principal’s office?”

  Teachers ask tricky questions too. They ask questions about things that they already know we don’t want. I don’t think that makes logic.

  I put my head down and look at my shoes. “I’m sorry, Mrs Haydon.” I already knewed that I should only say stupid when I’m thinking, but I said it out loud. That was stupid.

  “Now, if you have a little patience, my dear, I can show you how to make some green. Do you have a little patience?”

  I nod. But I can’t tell if this is a Daddy type question or a my Ted type question. But it doesn’t matter. If Mrs Haydon can make me some green, then I can paint some trees.

  We walk to my big wood thing and Mrs Haydon smiles like she’s about to be naughty. She dips the paint brush in the yellow, and rubs it onto the plastic lunch box lid. Then she dips the paint brush into the water and then into the blue and rubs that onto the yellow. She moves the paintbrush around in the paint and the paint turns green!

  I can’t believe it! Maybe Mrs Haydon rooly is a witch, but a good witch pretending to be a bad witch, so that the bad witches don’t turn her into a mouse.

  Daddy says that you learn something new every day. But I bet he’s never learnted how to make magic colours!

  WHEN MUMMY MEETS ME at the school gate she tells me we’re going to meet Daddy in the park and that gives me fizzy feelings in my Mr Stomach. I wonder if he will be getting me an I-scream. I want a rainbow one today. The ones that look like rainbows make me suck my cheeks in because some of the colours are sour like lemons. I don’t like lemons, but I like rainbow I-scream.

  When we get there I give Daddy a big hug and he gives me a big hug back. Mummy is holding the book with the demons and I hope that the doors are still lockted so that Daddy doesn’t kick Mummy like my Ted did.

  When Daddy and I stop hugging she gives it to him. They touch hands for a rooly long time behind Daddy’s back. I think they think that I don’t see it, but I can. I can’t but somehow I’m thinking I can. Maybe Mrs Haydon gave me some magic powers for the day because I painted the best thing in the class and she put it up on the classroom wall.

  Maybe my mummy’s not-smartness travels to my daddy when they touch. Maybe that’s how bodies fall in love. I’ve hearded that word so many times on TV Hits, and all bodies in my family say that to each other. And Mummy had splained it to me one time, but I still don’t think I understand how it works.

  That makes me remember, I should ask her to show me the love that she founded a long time ago. Maybe I can understand it better when I see it. I was going to ask Mrs Haydon, but I felted a bit shy after she did the magic colours. She made me orange and purple and pink too. Now I know why she gave us white! I didn’t want to ask too many more favours after that. Because Daddy said doing that is “over-stepping the mark.” He splained what it meanted. I didn’t see any mark on the ground when Mrs Haydon was doing the colour magic. But then I thought of Mrs Haydon telling me to have a little patience, and I thoughted I should listen because teachers know what’s good for kids more than kids.

  The wind blows and it makes my arms feel funny. My arms go all dotted and my hairs like tiny feathers. Mummy and Daddy are all whisperly so no one can hear their secrets.

  “I didn’t read it. But it was torture.” That was Mummy, not Daddy.

  Daddy smiles and touches Mummy’s cheek with a word like gentle. I learnted that word today when Mrs Haydon tolded me to press the paint brushes down gentle so that the line didn’t go so thick. Mrs Haydon is very smart.

  I don’t think my Ted would be happy to see Daddy touch Mummy with the gentle word. Mummy tolded me that when two bodies go to a church to say their vows, that you’re not allowed to give love to another body else. But I don’t think I can say what I think until Mummy gives the love to me to hold.

  Daddy makes funny eyes at Mummy like he’s asking an invisible question and Mummy nods, and then nods at me.

  “Would you like to come and stay with Mary and me tonight? I can drop you off to school on the way to work in the morning.” That was Daddy speaking.

  Daddy does a blink with one eye to Mummy, and Mummy smiles a happy one.

  “That sounds like a fun idea, doesn’t it, Bonnie?” That’s my mummy, not Daddy.

  It looks like they are having invisible talking again, like Daddy did with Mary, but this time he doesn’t look annoyed.

  Mummy whispers, “You can keep her for two nights if you like.”

  He smiles a rooly rooly big one and I can see his teeth. “You sure?”

  Mummy nods and points her chin to the book and lifts the eyebrows above her eyes.

  Daddy smiles and shakes his head and nods and shakes his head. I don’t think he knows what he’s saying. Maybe he hasn’t learnted the invisible language as good as Mummy and my Ted yet.

  “Sweetheart, would you like to go and play on the slide for a while? Daddy and I have to discuss something in private. We’ll just be right over here.” Mummy points to the long wood seat that fits bodies like a couch, and I nod to answer that question that is like a trick and walk over to the slide. But I don’t go on the slide because every time I go on the slide my bum goes all burny on the skin and it stings a lot.

  I sit under the slide and play with the bark. The sun is hiding a bit now and I’m feeling a bit shaky, but not too shaky. I watch my mummy and my daddy smiling the happy way. That’s good. I think they are learning to do things poperly instead of the wrong way around now. Maybe Dr Right has been helping them to be learning too.

  But then my Daddy stands up rooly fast and runs behind the trees on the other side of the playground. My mummy is looking left and right and left again, like she is going to cross the road, but rooly rooly fast. My heart is going all bumpy because I think sumfing is wrong, but then I think they’re just playing hide and seek! So I get up and run towards Mummy because I want to play too, and I call out, “I know where he is! He’s behind the tree! Let’s go and find him together, Mummy!” And then my Ted says, “Find who, Bonnie? Who’s behind the tree?” And I look up and it’s my Ted, but his face is all faded because it’s trying to be summer again and the sun is poking in my eyes.

  “Hi Ted!” That’s me saying hi in a rooly high voice and I feel like giggling because now the four of us can play together and it will be so fun like Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. And then I say, “It’s—” but then Mummy laughs rooly rooly loud but it doesn’t sound like her popper laugh, and she says to my Ted rooly loud that I have an imaginary friend, and that makes me rooly angry because I’m not a crazy body, I’m smart, I go to school, I know that imaginary friends are just in books and I want to yell that Mummy is lying but then she looks at me rooly tough like I’ve never ever seen her look at me before, and my Ted huffs and puts his hands on his hips and squints into the sky and says, “How about we take the afternoon and go to the beach before the weather starts crapping out, hey?”

  I don’t know what crapping out means, but I don’t think it means sumfing good. I want to say that I want to go home with Daddy who is waiting for me in the trees, so that I can get my rainbow I-scream, but sumfing makes me feel like Mummy would get madly if I did that.

  “That’s a fabulous
idea, Ted.” That was Mummy sounding all excited but she’s not rooly. She looks at the tree where Daddy is hiding and I wave to him and Mummy smacks my hand down and it hurts. I make an ow and Mummy does a shooshing. It looks like my Ted doesn’t see Daddy. My mummy does doll’s eyes and we follow my Ted to the car.

  My mummy is being a bit silly. I think I understand the words Daddy and Mummy are doing all whisperly now. And that makes my Ted even sillier.

  My Ted is a Mr Grumpy. But I don’t think he is a baddie like in the movies with the violence. I don’t want to give him hugs like I want to give to my mummy. But there might be another girl somewhere who does want to give him hugs. And I think my mummy should tell him to go and find another body to live with if she doesn’t like him anymore. I think my mummy is being a meanie like Sara and Bianca. And that makes me wish my Ted to get a zillion hugs.

  February 21st, 1984

  ~Daddy

  This is such unacceptable behaviour on our parts, Bonnie. That was a really close call at the park yesterday and I’m sorry you had to be witness to that. I’m sure it confused you to no end. And I wouldn’t put it past you if you completely comprehended what was going on.

  You are a very intelligent young lady. Which means that one day you will understand why we do the things we do. Our foolish actions may seem selfish to you now. But when you love someone, it feels like the rest of the world has no right to exist. I hope one day you are granted this gift—this wonderful gift of love.

  Bonnie, Penny and I have a plan. I’m not sure I will be seeing you very often anymore. But it’s only temporary. I’m sorry we are being so secretive, but it’s for your own good. If Penny and I let our feelings for each other get in the way of making our past wrongs into rights, then the result will be catastrophic for you, especially at such an influential age, my love. Please don't be upset with me. Daddy loves you.

  Always.

  Part Three

  Love is Tangible

  Tape #07

  Bonnie: Why is that wood stuff in the park ground called like the dog sound? It doesn’t make logic.

  Dr Wright: Some things don’t make much sense, but it doesn’t mean they are incorrect.

  Bonnie: [blank stare]

  Dr Wright: You look upset today, Bonnie.

  Bonnie: [crosses arms and huffs]

  Dr Wright: Would you like to tell me what’s wrong?

  Bonnie: [shakes head]

  Dr Wright: Why not?

  Bonnie: Because it’s none of your beeswax.

  Dr Wright: Everything in this room stays between us. You know that, don’t you?

  Bonnie: Words can’t stick between bodies. They go out of mouths and into the air and float around like songs.

  Dr Wright: That’s very insightful, Bonnie.

  Bonnie: [blank stare]

  Dr Wright: I won’t tell anyone what you tell me. I promise. Is something happening at home that is bothering you?

  Bonnie: [shakes head]

  Dr Wright: Are you sure?

  Bonnie: [frowns]

  Dr Wright: We can sit here in silence until you’re ready to talk to me, Bonnie. But I’m not letting you go home until you tell me what’s going on.

  Bonnie: [falls into couch and buries her head into cushions]

  Dr Wright: Mummy showed me a really fantastic picture you made with macaroni at school. I’d like to hang one just like it on my wall. Would you make one for me?

  Bonnie: [screams into cushion]

  Dr Wright: Bonnie, if you don’t start behaving yourself, I’m going to have to let you go home without any jellybeans today.

  Bonnie: [sits up, wipes eyes, looks out the window] Mummy won’t let me hold her love.

  MUMMY HAS STOPPED TO cry when my Ted goes to the shop without her. I think that’s because she has stopped to write in the book. I knew the book was the badly!

  But now I’m madly at Daddy because he only talks to me on the phone. He said that he’s sorry I can’t come over to play, but that he has to look after Mary. It doesn’t make logic. Mary knows how to pretend to be a grownup. She doesn’t need to play with Daddy. But I do. It’s not fair!

  But I think it’s good that Mummy isn’t doing sillies with Daddy anymore. Because my Ted “deserves better.” That’s a thing what Mummy said when she sawed a TV show about the Youth in Asia. It was sumfing about how they should be able to choose when to die if they are really sick. There must be a lot of sick kids in that country if they are going to let them make themselves to die. I hope they go to heaven.

  I think Mummy is becoming smart. Because she smiles a lot now and the smiles are happy and the way they’re supposed to be. And she hasn’t beened happy crying either. Daddy is right. You do learn sumfing new every day. Even grownups who pobably know almost everything already like Mrs Haydon and Dr Right.

  My Ted brought me home sumfing called a custard apple. And I asked him to give the list of things to buy from the super for Mummy to make some more because they tasted rool yummy. My Ted laughed at me again. He said that custard apples are a plant and they grow to taste that yummy. But that doesn’t make logic. I sawed Mrs Haydon make toffee apples at the fete and the toffee was maded by her!

  I think that the fruit is making my Ted a bit more not-smart.

  It think that my Ted might be a fruit loop.

  April 19th, 1984

  ~Mummy

  John said that it shouldn’t be long now before he finds Mary a flat. She’s old enough to live on her own now, and it seems they have given up hope regarding Mary’s mother getting her memory back. John said that once Mary moves out that we can move back in with him! Won’t that be so great?!

  Ted still doesn’t know we’ve been meeting in the park to exchange the book. And he doesn’t know our plans either. I can’t break it to him yet. If I did he would probably throw us out on the street, and then what would we do? No, it’s best that it stays a secret until we can make this a reality. I know this is not a good example for you, and when you read this, please don’t think that this behaviour is acceptable. It’s not. But things are hard for me. I don’t have any skills. I’ve never had a job. I wouldn’t be able to afford to support you without Ted’s help.

  His business is going a lot better lately. So his mood has changed somewhat. Which is just wonderful for us and such good timing too. But it’s probably more to do with him believing I’ve given up on the book. He’s such a jealous man. I only write in it now when he’s at the shop and you’re at school. When I’m here all alone. When I’m finished, I hide it in an Arnott’s Assorted Biscuits tin and bury it in the backyard under the big jasmine bush. It’s safer that way.

  Everything is safer when you keep secrets.

  One day, you’ll learn that secrets are sometimes one’s only saviour. The only thing I deeply regret about this is how much it’s going to hurt Ted. He has been such a good father to you, and I’m such a horrible wife. I owe him so much.

  I wish I could make it quick and painless for him. Like ripping off a Band-Aid. If only life were that simple, Bonnie. I truly hope that when you grow up you fall in love and stay in love and that life remains as simple as it should be. Of course, there will always be complications, but if you truly love someone, I hope this book will be a constant reminder to never give up hope. If you are meant to be together, things will work out for the best in the end.

  Anyway, enough of this melancholia.

  Guess what it is this Sunday? Easter! Boy do I have a surprise for you.

  I THINK I HAD in-some-knee-ah because my Ted and my mummy said I get to go on an egg hunt this morning in the backyard! It’s Easter Sunday today and yesterday I got to paint eggs with my Ted and Mummy and Daddy and Mary. I think my Ted and Daddy are friends now and I think that’s rooly good. Now we can all be a rooly happy big family and I can have two Daddies and a big sister too!

  I showeded Mary how to make magic colours. She was all surprised, and she put her hand to her mouth and went “oh wow” rool loud and started doing
some weird dance-jumping around the kitchen and saying silly things like abracadabra and wazzam-wazzoo Jackaroo.

  I think she already knewed about the colour magic. I don’t understand why grownups pretend to be surprised about things around kids. I was going to tell her that I knewed she was pretending but she was having so much fun so I pretended to be excited about her being excited and then we was both rooly happy making magic colours and painting the eggs.

  Daddy and Mary are coming over again this morning to do the egg hunt thing with me. I’m so excited, it’s going to be the best day in the whole wide world. I wanted Mummy to play too but she said she is going to be hiding the eggs so she can’t play. I said why not and she said because she will know where they are. I think my mummy is getting more smart because I didn’t think of that and I’m really smart.

  I can hear noises in the bathroom now, so I think my mummy or my Ted is gotten up. Then my mummy goes all singy-songy with my name in the hall.

  “Bonnie, Connie, Von Wommie, bam, wam, can, Bonnie,” and she starts making drums on the walls and then she runs into my bedroom and jumps on my bed and goes all tickling me!

  I’m giggling rool loud and she’s making roaring noises like a lion with courage which is silly because it’s Easter. She should be going brrk! brrk! like a chicken, and just then like she sawed my thinking thoughts she starts to go brrk! brrk! like a chicken and flicking her elbows out and in and it looks so funny, specially when she goes all gobbeldy with her head backwards and forwards. She looks so silly!