by Laura Wright
Ava cried out and her fist tightened around him.
"I can't wait any longer," she whispered, her voice hoarse. "Don't make me wait any longer. Don't make me beg, Jared."
"Do you want this?" he said, drawing his finger out of her body, then thrusting it back in. "To be me?"
She sucked in a breath. "Yes."
He guided her back, laid her down on the smoky, sage-scented rug on the earth floor. "You will come with me?"
She nodded for she couldn't speak. Her body wouldn't allow it as it waited in anticipation for what it craved.
After sheathing himself, Jared positioned himself over her. He entered her slowly, his eyes locked on hers. There was something behind his gray gaze, she realized through a haze of desire. Something sad, but sweet at the same time and she felt like crying as she stared up at him.
The intensity between them ran so thick that Ava wanted to look away. But she knew she mustn't.
Love flowed through her veins as he began to move inside her. She wrapped her legs around his waist, pressed up to meet him. At first his strokes were languid, a dance she recalled so vividly, then they grew quicker.
Sweat beaded on Jared's forehead as he worked her body with his own.
"I remember this," he uttered, reaching underneath her buttocks and lifting her hips.
This time Ava let the tears come, let them escape the corners of her eyes and drip down her cheekbones. She remembered, too. As though time had never passed.
Lord, how could he ever know how much he was loved?
Rain pounded on the roof of the sweat lodge like tribal drums, and Jared matched its pace. Deep in her womb, Ava throbbed. Ached. She was in agony and holding on to her climax was nearly impossible.
She called out, called his name and gave in, shuddering, convulsing around him.
"Ava… Na'hesta," he uttered with guttural intensity as he drove into her with one last deep thrust, before following her over the edge.
He collapsed on top of her, his breathing labored, his skin so warm and protective over hers she wished they could remain that way forever, all night or for as long as possible.
In the comfort of his arms, Ava couldn't help but wonder about what would happen next, what would be said—if Jared would get up and leave without a word. But her fears were quickly allayed when he rolled to the side, gathered her in his arms and held her tightly against him.
She released a weighty breath.
One she'd been holding in her lungs since the day she'd left Paradise.
Listening to the sound of his heart beating in his chest—first hectic, then slow, Ava let herself relax, let herself sleep, completely at peace.
* * *
Ten
« ^ »
"I want to take Lily."
Under a beautiful blue morning sky, Ava sat beside Jared and their daughter on the porch swing of the Redwolf Ranch house as her sister proposed the idea of baby-sitting Lily for a few nights.
"C'mon, sis," Rita said, crossing her arms of her chest.
"Are you bringing her to Dad's?" Ava asked, keeping her voice neutral for Lily's sake, but shooting her sister a look of caution.
"We all want to spend some time with her. And I can bring her to the wedding rehearsal myself."
"Rita, she was sick and—"
"She's not sick anymore—" she tossed her niece an exaggerated wink "—are you, pumpkin?"
Lily shook her head as she bounced up and down on Jared's knee. "Nope."
"See there," Rita said, leaning back against the wood railing. "I want to get to know her. So does Dad."
Ava flinched, she couldn't help it. Such a reaction had become instinctual. Of course, she wanted Lily to know her family, spend time with them, but there were things to take into consideration. One was her father. Without Ava around would he still be loving and gentle with her daughter? And two… With Lily and Muna away, there was no reason for her to stay at Redwolf Ranch.
Last night had been wonderful, except for the fact that they'd left the sweat lodge and headed home to separate rooms, separate beds. She would've loved a chance to wake up in his arms just once.
She looked pointedly at Rita. "You'll constantly supervise? I don't want any comments about the past—"
"No problem," Rita assured her. "Total supervision."
Her lips a little tight, Ava gave her daughter a smile. "Do you want to have a sleep over at Auntie Rita's and go see Grandpa?"
"Yes, yes, yes!" Lily exclaimed.
Her heart melted at the excitement in her daughter's face. Who knew? Ava thought. After this wedding, life could, and probably would, return to normal. Back to New York, away from her family. Lily wanted time with them. She deserved to have that time.
"All right," Ava said, tousling Lily's hair. "But just for two nights."
"Yea!" the little girl shouted. "Grandpa's house!"
"This okay with you, Jared?" Rita asked.
Jared looked at Ava, his gaze unreadable, then he looked down at his smiling, animated daughter and said, "Of course."
Lily snuggled into Jared's chest. "You'll call me when Tayka has her baby?"
"Of course, Little Star." He kissed the top of her head. "You go and have fun with your grandpa and Aunt Rita."
* * *
Jared kicked his feet up on the desk, ignoring his lawyer's comments, advice and objections as they spewed out one by one over the speakerphone. "You're not hearing me, Blake."
"But have you considered the overhead for a place like that?" the man asked.
"Of course I have." It was Jared's job to know such things. And granted, if a client of his came looking for advice on buying an old wreck of a ranch, he'd steer them in a different direction, too. But this wasn't about profit or good investment. "I want it, Blake. I don't care how much it is."
"Mr. Redwolf, please listen—"
With an audible curse, Jared dropped his feet from the steel desk and wrenched himself forward. "Just get me that ranch." Then stabbed the disconnect button.
"What are you doing?"
Jared glanced up. Looking lovely in a white blouse and tan pants, her blond curls piled on top of her head, Ava stood in the doorway, her brows drawn together in a worried frown.
"Just business," he said tightly.
"Buying another ranch?"
"Could be."
"Where?" She walked into the room and up to his desk.
Guilt pricked at him, but he shoved it aside. There was no way he was going to feel guilty about taking that man's property. Not after what he'd done. Not after the years of planning, of plotting a retribution that was sure to bring Jared some sense of relief. "The ranch is here in Paradise. Out on Raven Trail."
A deep frown creased her forehead. "On Raven Trail? But that's where our place—"
"Ava—"
"Why would you want that ranch?"
"You know why," he ground out, standing up, coming around his desk.
"Yes, I suppose I do." With shaky fingers, she brushed a phantom hair from her blouse. "But it's not even for sale yet. Dad hasn't decided—"
"I'm afraid he won't have much of a choice. The bank is ready to foreclose." The words felt like smooth, delicious honey in his mouth.
Her eyes searched his. "How do you know all this?"
"I have connections."
They stood so close, just as they had last night. Except this time, they were fully clothed and masked in their own bitterness and grief.
"Makes you happy to ruin him, doesn't it?" she said quietly.
"Yes." Jared didn't like the look in her eyes. She wasn't angry, she was confused and hurt and he was the cause. That fact filled him with little pride. But he pressed on as though some demon possessed his heart. "I refuse to allow his misdeeds to go unpunished."
"Well, good luck to you." She gave him a melancholy smile. "I just came to say goodbye and to thank you for the hospitality."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm all packed up and ready to go."
An invisible vise gripped his chest. "Where are you going?"
"Home."
"To New York?" He could barely spit out the words as anger rippled through him.
She shook her head. "No, to Rita's."
Mild relief sank its teeth into the anger and he leaned back against his desk. "Don't you want to spend some time over at your father's place, too?"
"You mean while it's still his?"
"Ava, the ranch is going to go to someone."
"I know, but are you the truest person for it? Are you meant for that place?"
He made a dismissive gesture with his hand. "You sound like Muna."
"She's a wise woman."
"She is overly forgiving."
Ava didn't respond, didn't move. Her gaze remained on his as if she was urging him to take it all back, to forgive and forget.
But he wasn't about to do that, either.
She nodded. "I'll see you at the wedding, Jared." Then she turned and walked to the door.
She was already in the hall when Jared caught up with her, took her hand. "Don't go."
"What?"
"Stay here with me." He didn't understand this desperate need he had for her. It just seemed that the closer he got to his revenge, the closer he wanted to cleave to Ava.
"Why?" She shook her head. "Lily's gone."
He lifted her hand to his mouth, kissed her palm. "Stay with me. Not for our daughter, but for me."
He'd never seen such a struggle go on behind two beautiful green eyes. But he understood it. He felt it, too.
"Like old times or something?" she asked on a dry chuckle.
"No—" he pulled her into his arms "—like new times. I've imagined so much in the past few years. Of you and I in this house alone."
On a weary sigh, she sagged against him, her voice aching with need. "I want to…"
"Then do." He held her against him, pressing her head to his shoulder. "For the next two days, let's erase the past four years. Let's eat, drink, make love and talk of long ago and of yesterday."
"Okay." She whispered the word into his neck, her soft lips pressing against his racing pulse.
* * *
It was close to midnight, the bewitching hour, when Jared slid deep inside her body. Her back to his charcoal sheets, Ava squeezed her buttocks tight and pressed her hips up to meet him. She didn't call out though, didn't make a sound. She wanted every last bit of pleasure that would complete their two day holiday to remain beneath her skin, where she could hold on to it forever.
Above her, Jared had his head thrown back, his chest rippled with hard, cut muscle and beaded with sweat. Ava let her gaze travel down his belly, down to where black hair ran in a thin line, down farther to where they were joined, wet and pink.
It was a beautiful sight.
She wanted to take their lovemaking slow, lose herself in the climax that was creeping up on her, winding through her body like a restless snake.
But Jared had other ideas.
He took his hand and ran it down her torso, slipped a finger between the V of hair at her core and stroked the hot, wet bundle of nerves he found there.
Heat shocked her senses, pleasure exploded throughout the tunnel of her body.
It was too much for any woman to bear.
Ava released the moan that had been waiting in her lungs. She arched her back, feeling her nipples tighten and ache as the hot current of orgasm sparked through her womb, down her legs and back up again. She felt her feminine muscle fist around Jared, pulsate around him, urging him to join her until at last he did.
Ava wrapped her arms around his neck as he dropped on top of her, his breathing ragged.
She stared up at the ceiling of his bedroom with its tribal, textured paintings and heavily woven, brightly colored tapestries. It was so him. Raw, dangerous, vivid.
Beside the bed the phone rang, jarring Ava from her thoughts. Jared ignored it, kissing her neck with lingering passion. But Ava felt compelled to say, "It could be about Lily."
With a rush of breath, Jared was up and off of her in one second. "Of course. I need to get used to that." He gave her a wide grin, then picked up the phone, glancing at the caller ID. "No, it's just my lawyer. Business has no hours."
In one instant, the romance and the intimacy of the moment were lost. Ava felt like sinking into the mattress. "Right."
Jared rested above her, his weight on his arms, his eyes imploring her. "Ava, let's not—"
"You shouldn't do this," she said quickly, without thinking.
"Shouldn't do what?"
"Don't buy our ranch, Jared."
The tenderness in his expression died right there. He sat back, ground out, "So it's 'our' ranch now, is it?"
Ava sat up, too, holding the gray sheet to her breasts. "This isn't about my dad. This isn't about saving him."
"Sounds that way."
"It's about you."
"I don't need to be saved."
She reached out, touched his face. "Can't we let the past go? Both of us. Let it go? Isn't it better to rejoice in what we have now?"
"And what is that?" he asked, eyebrow arched.
Ava paused, biting her lip. She didn't know what they had, she only knew what she felt and if she didn't say it now she'd never respect herself. "I love you, Jared. I've never stopped loving you." She sat up taller, lifting her chin. "I've made some mistakes. Some whoppers. But I'm hoping you can forgive me."
His mouth was set in a grim line. "And your father? Must I forgive him, too?"
"Don't you think your anger might be slightly misplaced?"
"No."
"Yes, he kicked you off the land. Yes, he was a bigot and—"
"Was?"
"Yes, was." She swallowed hard and hoped she was doing the right thing, knowing she had no choice—her conscience demanded her to be completely truthful. "But I didn't leave because he made me. Not completely."
Moonlight bathed the room in pale white, illuminating Jared's ruthless expression and hard mouth.
"When my father found out I was pregnant," she said, her heart slamming against her ribs. "He ordered me to go to New York. But I refused."
His gaze glittered cold and impatient.
"I refused until…"
"Until what?"
"Until he told me that he would kick you and Muna out onto the street if I didn't leave." She inhaled deeply and knew that what she was about to say next might truly be the end of them. "Maybe I didn't believe in you. Maybe I didn't think you could take care of all of us. I don't know. I'm not sure. I was really scared back then. But I do know one thing, the main reason I left was to protect those that I loved. Muna, Lily and you."
There, she'd said it. Everything was out in the open. She held no more lies in her heart.
She watched the realization of her words come over him.
"You're right, Ava," he said finally, his features hard and unyielding. "My anger has been misplaced. All this time I thought you'd left because he'd forced you."
"I wanted to come to you and tell you—"
"That you didn't think I could support you and our child?"
She inched toward him on the bed. "Jared, you were just starting out, working your way up. I didn't want to get in the way of that. I didn't want to burden you—"
"Our child was a burden?"
"No! Please try to understand my state of mind. I loved you so much. I wanted you and Muna to be okay."
"You're packed and ready to go?"
Ava froze at his words, shriveled a little at his expression. The love of her life was looking at her with pure hatred and she wanted to fling herself into his arms and shake him until he understood. She choked back the sob that maliciously tickled her throat and muttered, "Yes."
"Then maybe you should go."
She nodded slowly, then swung her legs over the side of the bed and stood up, taking the sheet with her. "All right, Jared. I'll go. But know this. For whatever it's worth, I love you so much and I am d
eeply sorry for everything that's happened. You'll never know how sorry. But there's nothing anyone can do to change the past. Not me, not my father or his ranch—"
"Holy sh—" Jared came to an abrupt halt, regarded her with a critical squint. "Did you sleep with me to save your father's ranch?"
Tears pricked Ava's eyes and she felt sick to her stomach. She had to get out of his room, his house, his life. "I'm going home now," she said, gathering up her clothes with shaky hands. "Lily will always be yours and always be in your life. I, however, will not."
On legs weakened by harsh words, she left the room.
* * *
Eleven
« ^ »
Dawn broke earlier than usual but Jared was too hung-over to notice.
After Ava walked out last night, he'd walked up—up to his office and straight to the bar. Of course, drowning himself in whiskey hadn't been the smartest thing he'd done all year, but it sure had blotted out the past few days. For six or seven precious hours he'd lain against the cool surface of his desk and drifted off into sweet oblivion, forgetting about Ava, about making love to her and about sending her away with his unforgiving boorishness and one very harsh question.
He raked his hands through his hair, then leaned back in his chair. Where had that question come from? Hell, he knew she hadn't slept with him to save Ben's ranch. She was in love with him. Still, after all these years. He'd seen that love in her eyes from the moment they'd bumped into each other at Benton's Bridal. In fact, he'd found great pleasure in the fact.
He'd accused her because he'd wanted to hurt her.
And he had.
Pride didn't fill his empty gut, only a deep sense of regret. But regret wasn't wise now, he reminded himself. He needed to find his way back to resentment—and vigilance. After last night, Ava might just be mad enough to take Lily back to New York without talking to him first.
He couldn't allow that.
"You are acting like a child, Jared Redwolf."
Jared groaned, glancing at the old woman walking through his office door. She had returned home before sun-up, taken meditation to the hills, then had obviously spoken to Ava or Rita while she drank her herbal tea.