* * *
LAUREN READ THE CHART for the next patient, and her breath caught in her throat.
Carl was in for his first checkup. No doubt he was hoping to get his stitches removed and permission to return to work early. Lauren set her jaw... Not if she had anything to do with it. The past few days had been much more comfortable for her, knowing he was safe at home. Or at least that he wasn’t in uniform. And she didn’t want him going back before he was 100 percent fit.
In the examination room, Carl was sitting easily in a chair, reading a National Geographic magazine. He tossed it to one side.
“Good morning,” she said brightly. “How are you feeling?”
“Fine. I heal fast. I gashed my arm as a kid when I was stupid enough to ride my bike while carrying a mason jar. The doctor was amazed that I tried it again two days later.”
“Did you have another accident?”
“Nope.”
Lauren glanced down at his chart, then blinked and looked up again. “Why were you carrying a mason jar?”
“I was collecting fireflies. I was under the mistaken impression they would make a bang-up nightlight for my little sister.”
She grinned. That sounded like Carl. “Well, your vitals look good, but I need to check the cut to see if the stitches can be removed yet.”
“Okay.” He stood, then sat on the exam table. “The nurse wanted me to wear one of those gowns with the little ties. I told her I could pull up my shirt as easily as one of those dignity-sucking outfits.”
Lauren held back a laugh. “No problem.”
Still, when he lifted his shirt it evoked bedroom images she’d rather not think about. So she locked them firmly into a mental drawer. Shutting out disturbing thoughts was a trick she had employed during training.
She removed the bandages. The slash on Carl’s ribs was healing well, but she thought the stitches shouldn’t be removed for another few days.
“Are you sure?” he asked.
“It was a long cut,” she pointed out. “And it’s in an area that gets stretched every time you bend or move. But I think you can start showering again.”
“Good.”
From the expression on his face she suspected he’d already showered at least once. But the wound showed no sign of infection, so it was likely all right. She applied a new, more compact bandage.
“Be sure to keep an eye on it,” she told him. “Come back if it gets red or swollen or you have more than a small amount of clear drainage.”
“Sure.” He sat up and tucked his shirt into place.
“Uh...” Lauren hesitated, but it wasn’t right to let him keep assuming his risky job was the only barrier between them.
Carl raised an eyebrow. “Something else?”
“There’s something I need to clarify,” she said carefully. “The other night you...well, assumed that my problem with us getting involved is that I can’t handle your job. That’s just part of it.”
“I’m only your patient until this thing heals,” he returned sharply. “In fact, the next time I come in, I’m asking for another PA. You’re fired, as of right now. So you can forget the doctor–patient thing as a reason for not getting involved.”
Lauren gathered her courage. “That isn’t what I meant. The thing is...I...I don’t deal well with conflict. Maybe that isn’t terribly unusual, but it’s particularly acute for me.”
Fumbling, she tried to describe her childhood and how any kind of conflict between people left her irrationally convinced it meant the end.
“You’re strong, and I knew before we ever went out that you needed someone who could be strong with you,” she concluded miserably. “My old boyfriend in Los Angeles thought it would be okay, and he was a store manager, not a cop. But ultimately he got tired of it and called me ‘the gutless wonder.’”
“That was cruel and uncalled for,” Carl said quickly. “Besides, you can’t judge me by what he did.”
“Maybe not, but I know my weaknesses. I only brought this up because I think you’re making a mistake to back off whenever a woman is worried about your job. Surely you want to be with someone who cares about your safety. So don’t try to make that decision for someone else. That isn’t fair, and it will cheat you both.”
Lauren rushed from the room, blinking tears from her eyes. The thought of Carl dating someone else hurt, but she’d said what she needed to say.
* * *
TARA SHOOK HER head emphatically. “You’re wrong, Josh. The designated hitter rule in the American League has a lot of value. There ought to be something that distinguishes between the two leagues. And another benefit is that it can extend the career of a great baseball player.”
“It’s a ridiculous way to play the game. Everyone who hits should fill a position, and vice versa.”
“In that case, maybe the first-and third-base coaches should be position players, too.”
“That isn’t the same thing.”
“It doesn’t seem that different to me.” They’d debated the subject for the past ten minutes, and it was plain they would never agree. That was all right. Tara had learned to love baseball while living in Japan and had strong opinions.
When Josh had insisted on staying with her and Walt, she’d expected endless arguments whenever they were alone. Instead, while they’d debated and occasionally sniped at each other, they’d also discussed everything under the sun. Naturally the times he’d ridden down to deal with ranch business had been less stressful, but they’d also felt curiously flat.
She still disliked him, right?
Sexual compatibility didn’t mean she’d changed her mind about him being pushy and unreasonable, though admittedly, now that she understood some of the reasons for his behavior, it was easier to forgive.
Not that it mattered. In another ten days or so, Tara estimated their combined supplies would be exhausted. She hadn’t told Walt; it still worried her how he’d respond if they didn’t find any sapphires.
“Is something wrong?” Josh asked. He’d grown more adept at recognizing the tiniest shift in her mood.
“Just thinking about Walt. He’s sensible, but I’d hate to see disappointment setting him back.”
“Grandpa knows you’re concerned. I doubt he knows how he’ll react, but even if we don’t find something this time, it doesn’t mean the search is over.”
“True. And I’m sure he sees value in simply making the trip. Even a failed attempt can be a valiant quest.”
“That sounds like a fairy-tale conclusion.”
“Because I called it a quest?”
Some of the things they’d debated were words and their uses or meanings and emotional impacts. Josh was smart, well-read and as opinionated as Tara was herself.
Fortunately, the one thing he hadn’t tried to discuss was their lovemaking—or sex, or intercourse, or whatever term was most accurate. Tara had always thought “making love” wasn’t the right term unless two people were actually in love. Anything else was just about satisfying a physical need.
A quiver of desire ran through her veins as she remembered the pleasure she’d experienced that night at the pool. Sex was more powerful than she’d ever believed, but she wasn’t in love with him.
After all, who wanted a handsome rancher who thought raising organic cattle was the most important thing in life?
Once she left Montana, she would surely regain her balance.
* * *
JOSH SHARED TARA’S worries about his grandfather, though he agreed that Walt would be able to find value in the attempt. Her insight was impressive, particularly when he considered her bleak childhood.
He had to smile when he recalled her firm command not to think she was whining. Tara didn’t feel sorry for herself. And while she didn’t brag, he’d figured out
enough to know she’d gotten through college mostly on her own dime and was in demand in her field.
Actually, it was almost laughable that she’d been willing to clean out the Boxing N ranch office and sort its records. She could write her own ticket anywhere in the world, yet she’d taken on the Boxing N for a fraction of what she could charge elsewhere.
Then, when an old man desperately needed a new interest in life, she’d cheerfully traveled into the mountains to sleep on the ground and spend twelve hours a day in hard and dirty labor.
Josh wondered where his own brain had been for so many months, butting heads with Walt and grinding his teeth because he wasn’t getting exactly what he’d dreamed of. He’d completely missed the reason Walt couldn’t let go.
“Is this one of those Montana agates?” Tara asked, holding out a stone for him to examine.
“Yeah,” he said, struck again by the fact he’d spent little time on his rock-hound hobby lately.
She tucked it into her pocket. “At first I wondered whether having agates and other stuff all mixed up meant it was ridiculous to think sapphires might also be here. Then I realized that’s the point of looking in alluvial deposits. Everything gets washed into streams and rivers and mixed up together.”
“Sure. Stones have been carried by water, so you could have various things from all over the place.”
Tara glanced toward the mountains west of them. “I’ve been thinking, though. If there are sapphires in alluvial deposits, they’d have to come from somewhere higher up.”
“Probably. Grandpa thinks this area is where the original sapphires were found, and that’s why he wanted to search here. But eventually we may need to look elsewhere.”
As he spoke, Josh was aware that he was now completely hooked on the search. He’d had more fun the past few weeks than any other time in recent years. Part of it was his growing relationship with his grandfather...and part of it was spending time with Tara. But it wasn’t just the possibility of more incredible sex; she was also good company. She had intelligence and humor in spades and wasn’t shy about giving him hell when she didn’t agree.
Tara stood and stretched. “I’m going to dig for a while,” she said. “I like to have a good pile for Walt when he comes back.”
“Just a minute,” he said, standing and leading her to the shady spot where the tiny waterfall made their work easier.
Pulling her close, he laid his lips over hers. Lord, she smelled good.
“What was that about?” she asked with the same nonchalance about their intimacy that she’d shown before. Except now he thought it meant more to her than she revealed.
“I wanted to find out what it was like to kiss you without having warm water all over us.”
“But you kissed me in the office once, remember?”
He definitely remembered.
“True,” he agreed. “But that was different.”
“I don’t see how.”
Josh smiled. “I could show you, but Grandpa might come back early, and I’m not an exhibitionist.”
The blue in Tara’s eyes darkened. “I suppose we could meet at the pool tonight, after he’s asleep. Not to go in the water, since you want to satisfy your curiosity about...dry skin.”
“We could always swim afterward.”
“True.”
Determinedly she pulled away and marched toward the shovel.
Josh watched, torn. Sharing his life with Tara might mean more than all the other goals he’d worked toward and he couldn’t escape the fact that he’d fallen in love and wanted a lifetime together. The revolution in his ideas about his life stunned him. But Tara didn’t want to live in Schuyler. Just the day before, she’d talked about which country she might pick next, and whether she ought to take a one-year contract over the usual two—because that way she could see more of the world.
And what if he did convince her to marry him? One day she might get tired of ranch life and wasting her abilities. There weren’t any businesses around Schuyler that truly needed someone with her qualifications. How would he feel once she took off for London or Tokyo or one of the other places she loved?
Perhaps it would be even worse if she didn’t leave. She was loyal and gritty and might stay to make the best of things. Josh’s stomach rolled at the thought, because it meant he’d be doing the same thing to her that he’d always assumed his grandfather had done to Evelyn.
* * *
STUNNED, TARA STARED down at the translucent green lump in her fingers. She’d glanced down as she was digging and the sun had caught it just right in the pile of dusty rocks.
Dirty, rough and irregular, it looked exactly like the photos of raw green sapphires she’d seen while researching Montana gemstones.
Dropping the shovel, she hurried to where Josh was sorting rocks.
“I found one,” she practically shouted.
He straightened and looked carefully at the stone, a cautious expression on his face. “Interesting. What makes you think it’s a sapphire?”
“I know it isn’t blue, but they come in all sorts of colors. This is exactly like one of the green sapphires I saw on the internet.”
“They aren’t just blue?” All of a sudden Josh groaned. “I’m sure I haven’t seen any stones like this up here, but they’ve been right in front of me my entire life and I never recognized them. None of us did.”
“What do you mean?”
“Have you ever seen one of those old canning jars—the ones that used to have zinc lids and eventually turn lavender?”
Tara wasn’t familiar with them, but she nodded anyway and waited.
“There’s one in the kitchen,” he continued. “Grandma kept it in the window because it was full of marbles and rocks and she liked the sun shining through them.” Josh held the sapphire up and shook it. “There are several in there that look quite a bit like this one.”
Tara tried to choke down a laugh.
“Go ahead,” he said. “Laugh your head off. It’s the best and worst joke that’s ever been played on the Nelson family.”
It bubbled out of her, and he reluctantly joined her.
“Sapphires,” he said at length, pulling her close. “Sapphires.”
His kiss was full and deep, and Tara returned it with all her strength, but when his hands slid under her T-shirt, she stepped backward.
“Whoa, we need to go tell Walt.”
Josh grinned. “Yeah.”
Back at the campsite, Walt was seated in his chair and looked up eagerly when they catapulted into the clearing.
“Look what Tara just found,” Josh exclaimed, handing the raw gem to him. “It’s a green sapphire.”
Walt’s eyes gleamed. “Do you know what this means?”
“Sure. It means my great-great-grandfather found sapphires a century ago and the proof has been staring us in the face every time we wash our hands.”
“What?” Walt demanded.
“The jar that Grandma kept over the kitchen sink...remember what’s in there?”
Comprehension dawned on Walt’s face, and he groaned exactly the way Josh had groaned. Then he chuckled. “Ah, well, water under the bridge.” He held the gem in the air and admired it. “Let’s get to work. Where there’s one, there could be more.”
“Absolutely,” Josh agreed enthusiastically. “We may have finally hit the right layer.”
Tara was amazed by his zeal.
“We might not find any of gem quality,” she cautioned them both.
“Who gives a rat’s ass?” Walt asked.
“That’s right. You just found a sapphire, and no one can take the fun of it away from us,” Josh declared.
Relaxing, Tara nodded. “Then let’s go.”
Walt walked with a new bounce in his step as they return
ed to the dig site.
They carefully pulled out more piles of dirt and stones. Tara discovered a tiny blue sapphire in her sieve an hour later, and Walt got one soon after. It wasn’t until nearly dinnertime that Josh exclaimed and held out a translucent brilliant blue stone in his fingers.
They forgot about food and everything else as they worked. It was dusk when they reluctantly returned to the campsite to eat trail mix and crawl into their sleeping bags.
But Tara hadn’t forgotten her suggestion to Josh about meeting at the hot spring pool. When she saw him quietly slip away, she sat up and checked to be sure Walt was asleep.
Why not enjoy it while she could? She would never be in these circumstances again, and she wanted Josh with every cell in her body.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
JOSH WOKE THE next morning, knowing that if he were a rooster, he’d be crowing at the top of lungs, hardly the attitude of a twenty-first-century man. Tara had joined him at the hot spring pool, turning into a temptress, bewitching him as she pulled off her clothes and lay on the tarp he’d spread in hopes she would come.
They’d made love not once but twice in the brilliant moonlight. Afterward, they’d gone into the warm water, swimming and playing as if they were children instead of adults who’d enjoyed all the pleasures of their sexuality.
Later, Tara had dressed and returned to bed, barely acknowledging him as she departed.
Why did she act that way? He was certain she didn’t take sex casually, but he was equally certain he didn’t know what was going on in her head.
He kept returning to the thought of what it would be like to share a life with her. But if he couldn’t figure out why she was so remote after making love, he certainly couldn’t fathom how she’d feel about marriage.
Except he did know. She’d made her feelings perfectly clear when he’d stupidly declared he wasn’t interested in a long-term relationship. Who would have guessed he’d come to regret his adamant declaration?
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