“It wasn’t long before I met my mentor and friend, Rashad Uncle, who kindly gave me a job and after a few short weeks, opened his home to my family and me. His daughters were married and gone, and they welcomed the clamor that my family brought.
“After a time, there was even more clamor as our sixth child came into the world. My poor wife was so afraid to tell me. She didn’t want to add to my burden, as she felt that providing for another child would be another burden for me. How wrong she was, Madam Fairy. I have never seen any of my children as anything but a blessing. Never for one moment was I unhappy at the thought of this child. I loved her from the moment I knew she existed. I knew she would be nothing but a boon for us, and she’s never proved me wrong.
“Rulers come and go, and the tyrant in Basra also went the way of all flash. That place will never be the same for me. This is my home now. Would you believe Ali came to Sanaa at the same time my family did, and we did not know for a month of the other’s whereabouts? Ali found work on the other side of this bazaar, and I happened to meet him one day. I think Allah never meant for us to be too far away from each other.”
“There are some people in life, Junaid, who are meant to love you and be in your life no matter what you do, and there are some people who are not meant to love you and be in your life no matter what you do,” Gulnare said.
“Very true, Madam Fairy,” Junaid responded.
In any case, Ali and I found each other. I’m glad we did because it took me a long while to find true friends besides Rashad Uncle and his wife. I was a stranger here at that time, and all my time was spent providing for my family. There’s a difference between moving to a new place by force than by choice. There’s a built-in resentment that you must overcome. I must say it took me a while to let go of my resentment. When you don’t do terrible things yet terrible things happen to you, you start to become bitter.
“I found that issues that I thought I had buried were coming out in rather unreasonable ways. My reaction to Ali’s brother, my cousin, Saleh was one. Saleh and I were never as close as Ali and me. Saleh and Ali were never as close as Ali and me. He always resented it and me. He was a spoiled child who was used to getting his own way, and when he didn’t get it, there was a problem. When he had his little tantrums, he was placated. Of course, I was not spared his injustices, his thoughtlessness that sprang from overindulgence. He would do things to me here and there simply because he could, and I would have to get over it because: Who was I at the end of the day? Why shouldn’t I put up with Saleh? He could do no wrong in his parents’ eyes, so there was no point in arguing. So with a new land and a new life, I decided there
would be new rules. No longer would I endure slights and disrespect. So when Saleh moved to Sanaa with his family, I decided Saleh was no longer welcome in my home.”
“You look puzzled, Madam Fairy. Disappointed? Not sure what you conjured up in your head about me, but I am only human, not an angel.”
“I am puzzled as to what you hoped to accomplish with such an action. Since circumstances brought him down a peg, you decided to show your power? By throwing a tantrum just like him? Men have no idea what power really is. Power is silent restraint. Refraining from action when you know you can act. Men will never understand this.”
“Over time, I have learned. Acting, reacting, and in some cases overreacting, these things accomplish nothing. But you will allow some mistakes in a journey that has been plagued with unforeseen, burdensome, circumstances?”
“As long you learn from them, which it seems, you have,” Gulnare concluded.
“Don’t be sure, Madam Fairy. He’s long since moved to Yemen. He’s no longer here. So, I suppose we’ll never see how much I’ve grown,” he smiled.
“Somehow I think we will get to see,” she smiled back.
“I think I would like to make peace with him at some point. We both survived expulsion. We both have families. All our petty squabbles seem insignificant now.” He paused. “In any case, Allah then saw fit to throw more trial my way. He fights with me. I fight with him. It’s okay.”
“Stop it, Junaid. Allah has better things to do than fight with you. He tries us all. It makes us better Muslims and better human beings.”
“Then, I must be the best Muslim and human being in the world,” he smiled again.
“You’re impossible, Junaid.”
“So my wife has told me many times. In any case, there was a fire in the bazaar and Rashad Uncle lost everything. So there I was again, with no work to speak of. Now, I had Rashad Uncle and Parveen Auntie to take care of. There was no way I would abandon them, especially after the kindness they had shown me.”
“It’s not an easy thing to start over again, and I have had to do it more than once. Then, I had to do something that I had wanted to avoid my whole life. I had to take what little I had saved working for Rashad Uncle to join a caravan. I left my family for a year. Madam Fairy, I have been through many troublesome times in my life, but I must say that year away from my family was the hardest of my life. But I did what I had to for my wife and my children.
“I saw much of the world in that year, also. As you know, there are many wondrous things, but there also many horrid things. I saw my share of both. I saw great generosity, and great stinginess. I saw open charity, yet severe harshness. For some reason, it all came in my direction. Again, I gave in to my despair, and as so many of us do, I focused on the negative only. I saw some men give up and leave their families behind. I would never do that. I could never do to my children what my father did.”
At this point, Junaid let out a deep sigh. He paused. Gulnare studied him.
“Junaid, why didn’t you? I have found that most human beings will do to their children what their parents did to them. Most people act according to what they have seen, what they know. Why then, did you do the opposite?”
“Because throughout my childhood, I felt that I was denied my mother’s love. That’s understandable. That was Allah’s decision to take her from us. But why was I denied my father’s love, and he was still here? No child should ever have to ask that question. When I became a man, I swore that no child of mine would ever ask that question.”
She said nothing. She merely studied him, and he continued.
“After a year, I had earned enough to open a small shop of my own, so I returned home. It was a time of great joy. In time, I was able to open another shop, and, thank Allah, we were able to live as comfortably as we did before. We continued to live quite happily.”
“But was your question about your father ever answered, Junaid?”
“Now, I don’t feel as if I was denied my father’s love as much as it was masked by whatever it was he was going through. I have made my peace with the fact that that question will never be answered to my satisfaction. You know, once I alluded to his abandonment, and he actually was taken aback. To him since he knew we were taken care of, there was no fault on his part. How do you question someone who feels that they have done no wrong? It’s a useless one-way struggle. In any case, he made me a better father, and for that I am grateful.”
“You feel no bitterness towards him?”
“Whatever bitterness I felt towards him left my heart long ago. I have forgiven him. In any case, he is gone now. It’s up to Allah to judge, punish, or forgive.”
Again, Gulnare said nothing and simply gazed at him in admiration.
After Gulnare left Junaid, she pondered him and his story. Many human beings having had similar experiences would have given in to despair and hopelessness. Many would have become bitter and hateful. Although Junaid was not a perfect man, he still had so much love in his heart. The small amount of love he received early in his life was enough to teach him how to love. Many who are surrounded by love, still do not know how to love. Yet, he knew how to love and love with his whole heart. She also knew that she would always love him with her whole heart.
So Gulnare continued on in her travels, exploring the world and the h
uman beings in them. In all her travels, she never forgot the one who touched her heart most. Time passed. She loved and had children. Twenty years came and went in the raising of her children.
After they had grown, she and her jinn husband returned to Sanaa. She longed for the two objects of her affection to meet each other. Yet, she was not prepared for what she found when she saw Junaid again.
She found her human idol on his sickbed. Before that, she had to deal with his wife and her hysterics.
“Please help him! These useless doctors can do nothing for him!”
“Of course. Of course,” Gulnare answered, visibly shaken by the news of her friend.
“Silly mortal! What have you gone and done to yourself now?” she asked.
“Me! What has Allah done to me now? I do nothing to myself! It is all according to his will, not mine.”
“Still a rascal, aren’t you? Still challenging Allah? You will meet him soon enough. I would love to see what you do then.”
“We will know soon enough, Madam Fairy,” he replied with a sigh.
Still trying to keep the mood light, she introduced Junaid to her husband, Jalal.
“Glad to see you chose an immortal like yourself. A man would have been quite tiresome to you.”
“You know me well, my friend.”
At that moment, he coughed for a few minutes. Then, he took his medicine.
“This is the last round of medicine they have given me. If this does not work, there is nothing more to be done with me. Was there ever?” he said with a laugh.
“You can’t even take dying seriously can you?” she responded in an exasperated tone.
“How much is there really to ponder and brood over? One either lives or dies, not much in between.”
Over the course of a week, the doctors, Junaid’s family, Gulnare, and her husband kept watch over Junaid to see if he improved. He did not. In fact, his pain worsened. The doctors finally told them all that there was nothing they could do for him.
When she was alone with Junaid she said to him dispassionately, “Let me save you. You know I can.”
“No,” he said simply.
“Why not?”
“Because whatever I have said about Allah, religion, and all the insanity that goes with it, I believe in His will. Every experience I have ever had, no matter how joyous or painful, I am quite grateful for. Even at the end of my journey, I am still grateful.”
“How do you know it is not Allah’s will that I save you?”
“I stopped feeling pain today. You know what that means. I understand why my family is struggling so much with this, but you especially should know that this is not an ending but a new beginning. ”
“You know I am just as bound to this world as you are. I cannot travel back and forth as I please. As short as your lives are, I did not think I would have so little time with you.”
“I would have loved more time with you. You know I never got any of your stories. I am sure in your long tenure in this world you have many.”
“What of your children?”
“I have lived with this pain for the past ten years for them. I am finished, Madam Fairy. You know I have been seeing my mother quite a bit in my dreams, lately. I am looking forward to getting to know her.”
“Your wife?”
“Any one of my sons will take wonderful care of my wife. My great consolation is that when I see her again, I really will have her forever.”
“You’re so used to difficulty that when someone does offer you an easy way, you don’t know what to do. Anyone with any sense of self would take what I am offering.”
“Don’t you see? I have enough sense of self to know that this is my time to leave I accept that as I have accepted everything in life. Will you do one thing for me?”
“I, like everyone else, can refuse you nothing. What is your will?”
“When the time comes, help my family.”
“I will.”
“Please, call my family in. I would like to explain my decision to them so they don’t turn on you,” he smiled.
Gulnare and Jalal heard many raised voices and a lot of crying and weeping.
First, Junaid’s children came out, then his wife. She grabbed both Gulnare’s hands. They both understood. Junaid’s sons, however, did not. At breakfast, Junaid’s oldest son made this pronouncement:
“I don’t care what he says. You will save him Madam Fairy.”
“It’s not what he wants,” she said quietly.
“I don’t care what he wants,” he said with a tremor in his voice.
“He will never forgive any of us. You know that,” she responded.
“He’ll forgive us when he is healthy and happy.”
“Come with me, Saif.”
“Gulnare! I will not allow you or my own son to go against my husband’s wishes!” Laila cried.
“Mother!”
“Stop it, Saif! You have said enough!”
Then, Gulnare took both Laila’s hands, looked into her eyes, and said, “It will be fine.”
Laila believed her.
When Junaid’s family entered the room where Junaid lay, they found him with the most peaceful look on his face. Laila and Gulnare took each other’s hands again. Saif tried to wake his father. Then, they all tried to wake him, all except Laila, Jalal, and Gulnare.
Saif glanced at Laila and Gulnare and walked out of the room. Then, Laila and Gulnare consoled the other children. Laila cried alone later. Gulnare cried with Jalal.
For all his disappointment, setback, and pain, Allah, Granter of Wishes, granted Junaid’s last wish. He left this world precisely the way he wanted, with all he loved by his side.
As for Gulnare, she kept her promise to Junaid and kept an eye on his children after his death and beyond. She grew to admire his children as well. She saw a bit of Junaid in all of them. What surprised her most was that he lived most in his daughters; they all had the same unflappable spirit, especially his youngest. Yet even though he lived in his children, she never forgot Junaid. She never forgot the charming rascal who restored her faith in human beings.
Shaherazade's Daughters Page 18