"You didn't tell me you were sick." Once again, Grace hadn’t been able to be there for her grandmother. Guilt slammed into her.
"You had enough on your plate. There was no need to worry you." Nana pursed her lips and sat back casually in the chair, looking like she had when she'd reassured Grace about her new second grade teacher. "I know you'll get along with him. You'll see."
Fatigue from the long trip washed over Grace as she gripped the edge of the table. "Okay, I'll take your word for it."
A complete stranger was living down the hall from her naive grandmother. During Grace’s confinement in the nursing home, the back surgery and rehabilitation, the man had worked his way into Nana's heart and home.
Why would a man move in with an old lady if he didn't have ulterior motives? Maybe he was one of those types who married widows to get their life savings. Was he after the ranch, Nana’s money, or both?
The homestead had been in the family for three generations. She couldn’t stand by and let some kind of con artist cheat Nana out of it. Simply put, Grace couldn’t keep her mouth shut. “Did you have the guy checked out?"
Nana rolled her eyes. "There you go, again."
"Where’s he from? Does he have any family?”
“I know what you’re asking and I’m telling you, I didn’t have to do anything like that. I know a good person when I see one and Seth has a good heart. He’s worked on ranches since he was a boy. Grew up in Texas. He has family back there and gets letters but throws them in the trash. Those folks must’ve hurt him real bad for him to do something like that.”
She sighed and didn’t want to argue with Nana on her first night home. “I hope you know what you’re doing.” She bit her tongue and shut up. After the experience with her ex, Grace couldn’t see much good in any man but this wasn’t the time to continue the conversation.
Until now, the possibility had never occurred to her that Nana might still be attracted to men or need some kind of companionship other than the cat. Yet, Nana was sharp and energetic for her years. Confusing thoughts raced around Grace’s head while she wondered if Nana had dated anyone over the past few years. She hadn’t mentioned anything.
Grace sighed. She just wasn’t up to dealing with this tonight. At the moment, everything hurt. Feeling ancient, she tried to hide a yawn.
“Dear, you’re falling asleep on your feet. Why don’t you take a hot bath and get comfortable? I’ll call one of the boys from the bunk house to bring your luggage in from the car.”
Grace allowed herself to be manipulated by Nana’s smooth shift in conversation. “A hot shower sounds like heaven. I think I will. I’ve been cold all day.” She walked over to hug Nana. “Have you lost weight?” She could feel Nana’s small-boned body through her heavy sweater.
“Maybe a few pounds. I was getting too heavy.” Nana laughed and walked with Grace out of the kitchen.
“That’ll be the day.” Taking a closer look at Nana, she noticed the frailties and dark circles under her eyes. Her liveliness was still there, but Nana was in her sixties. She had always been in good health, but she didn’t look quite right. “When I’m finished I’ll come back down for another cup of tea.”
“Okay, I’ll keep the water on.” Nana walked into the living room and Grace watched her click on the TV to the evening news and settle back into the recliner as Ollie jumped onto her lap. Worry tugged at the corner of her mind. Would Nana tell her if something was wrong?
Maybe not, though Grace fully intended to worm it out of her. However, not tonight. Stifling another yawn, she turned down the hall. She rubbed the well worn oak railing as she climbed the stairs to her room, remembering the many times she and her best friend Cindy had slid down the banister.
Going into the bedroom was like taking a step back in time. Sitting on the bed for a minute to relax she looked around at the things she had left behind. The same antique white lace curtains hung over the wide windows. Her favorite forest green throw lay across the foot of the double bed.
Sighing, she got up and grabbed her robe that still hung on the back of the adjoining bathroom door. She turned on the welcoming spray and adjusted the water temperature.
A few moments later, she dropped clothing to the floor and stepped into the warmth. Letting the hot water trickle over tight muscles, it slowly took away some of the bone-tired fatigue and began to ease her pain. She would sleep well tonight, but first she would visit with Nana. The last thing she wanted was for her grandmother to be upset about their disagreement over Seth.
Coming out of the shower, she wrapped herself in a huge fluffy towel. She dried off and pulled her soft blue robe against her bare skin. It was thin and a little small since she’d put on a few pounds, but it would keep the chill away until she could find some pajamas.
She picked up a comb and ran it through damp hair and worked the knots out of the long strands. The woman staring back from the mirror was a stranger. She wasn’t the same person she used to be. She had gained thirty pounds after going through the divorce and surgery. The stubborn chin, brown eyes and long natural dark blond hair were the same but the person inside was someone else, someone she was discovering with each new day.
With hair dry and body refreshed from the shower, Grace began to feel human again. A loud thump sounded outside the bedroom door. She froze. Oh God. Had Nana fallen? In a panic, she rushed out the door and flew around the corner straight into a solid chest. A man’s chest.
Strong arms wrapped around her nearly naked body as she noticed luggage strewn around the floor. The smell of man, horse and leather tickled her nose. Startled, she glanced up to see familiar blue eyes staring back at her. The sexy cowboy. For an instant, being held in his arms, all her loneliness welded together in one upsurge of yearning. Grace’s heart thumped dangerously as a warm glow flowed through her.
She stepped back and clutched the skimpy robe together, knowing that it didn’t leave much to the imagination. It was hard to be coherent when she was this close to him. He stood there with a slow bemused grin lifting the corner of his mouth. “You? What are you doing here?” she asked.
He touched the tip of his fingers to the brim of his hat. “Hello, ma’am, I’m Seth Taylor. I live here.” His voice swept over her like a blanket fresh from a warm dryer. Soft and smooth. The grin spread across his face as he gave her the once over. “Well, if it isn’t the LA Lady. So you’re Nana’s granddaughter. She told me about you.” His eyes lit up like he could see right through her robe.
His nearness was disturbing and exciting. She struggled to get her traitorous thoughts under control. “Yes...you’ll have to forgive me. I…I didn’t expect to see you outside my bedroom door.” Flustered, she pushed a strand of hair out of her face. She was babbling, and naked beneath the flimsy robe. She felt her nipples harden from the chill in the hallway.
Embarrassed on so many levels, she resolved the first thing she was going to do was change those damned vanity plates. She’d hated them since Lee had given them to her for a birthday present. They were pretentious. Seth must think she was a California flake. What had Nana told him?
His eyes lit with a mischievous glint. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you. I was dropping off your luggage before I went to my room.” He leaned down and picked up the overturned suitcases and set them inside her door. “It’s been a long day and I’m sure you’re tired.” Nervous in his steady gaze, she couldn’t speak. “We’ll talk more in the morning.” He smiled. “Evening, ma’am.” He touched the brim of his hat again, turned and walked down the hall.
Her stomach churned with anxiety and frustration as she stood in the familiar hallway, rooted to the spot. Her fingers still clutched the top of her robe, but she couldn’t control the slight trembling within her. The man who had changed her tire was Seth—the cowboy Nana had hired. He wasn’t what she had expected. Somehow, she thought he would be older.
Holding her raw emotion in check she breathed in shallow quick gasps. Why, he was about her age
, thirty-six or so—but with a strong healthy body, full of virility. The man oozed sex appeal and damn she was attracted to him.
If he looked this good after a long day of hard work, she couldn’t begin to imagine what he would look like when he was fresh from the shower. No, she shouldn’t go there, but there was no denying it. The man was drop-dead gorgeous. With that shaggy mustache and his brown wavy hair peeking out from under the Stetson, even tinged with a bit of silver at his temples, he looked—tempting. And those magnetic blue eyes. Geez.... He definitely made her heart race. Please, God, have mercy. Let him be bald under that hat.
No wonder Nana was taken with him. All that charm in one package was hard to handle. Life just isn’t fair.
She blinked and curled her toes against the plush beige carpet. What was wrong with her? After Lee, she didn’t think she’d ever want to be with another man, and out of nowhere, here were all these feelings she thought were long dead. This was crazy. She was losing her grip—this was the man who was up to no good.
“Christ, Grace, snap out of it. One good-looking cowboy and you’re drooling. Get a hold of yourself.” She muttered under her breath as she pulled a flannel nightgown and another robe from her suitcase and redressed. Sighing, she headed down the stairs. “For heaven’s sake, he’s just a man.” And she’d sworn off men altogether.
Nana looked up from where she stood warming her hands by the crackling fire. “Grace, dear. There you are. Did the hot shower help?”
“Yes, I feel better." She hesitated for a second. "I met Seth. He’s the man who changed my flat tire today.” She struggled with mixed emotions as she sat on the comfortable sofa and pulled her feet underneath the long robe. “I was surprised to see him, here in the house.”
“It must be fate that you met earlier.” Nana laughed. “I knew you'd hit it off."
She was too tired to disagree. Besides, the man had been nice enough to help her out of a fix with the flat tire. Maybe she was making mountains out of molehills. She smiled, knowing Nana was amused by the coincidence. Regardless, deep inside, being home touched her heart and other than being around Seth, she felt at ease for the first time in a long time.
“Honey, I can’t begin to tell you how happy I am you’re here to stay. I’ve missed you so much.”
Nana sat in the recliner and Ollie crawled into her lap. He purred audibly as he rubbed his head against her hand. She scratched him under the chin, causing his purr to rise in volume. “Ollie is glad you’re home, too.”
“Oh yeah, he’s thrilled to see me.” Grace chuckled softly and gazed around the room. A picture of her parents sat on the right side of the mantel. Nana and Papa were on the left and long-ago snapshots of her growing up dominated the rest of the mantel between the green plants and gold candlesticks. With these pictures and Nana’s penchant for chatting, it dawned on her, Seth must already know more about her than Lee ever had, since Nana seemed to be taken with him and had hardly spoken to Grace’s husband.
She guessed he hadn’t recognized her on the road because of the weight she’d gained. That...and the fact she’d looked like a drowned mutt. But surely he had put two and two together when he'd seen the license plates. Why didn't he say something?
Outside, the snow continued to fall with the wind whistling around the back of the house. Grace glanced out the window toward the porch light. “It’s really coming down. I hope it doesn’t turn into a blizzard.”
“No worries, the big storm missed us. Now we’re only going to get a few inches. It’s not going to amount to much.” Nana continued to pet Ollie, pleasing the kitty immensely.
That reminded her.... “Nana, what are your plans for tomorrow? I need to go into town and do a few things. Would you like to go with me?” The hiss and pop of the wood fire relaxed Grace while she sat and watched the flames.
“Oh, I’m sorry, I can't. I volunteer at the hospital two days a week and tomorrow I work in the gift shop from ten to six. Maybe I can switch with someone.”
“No, don’t worry about it. I’m sure Cedar Falls hasn’t changed that much.” She stretched and yawned, thinking Nana must be okay if she worked at the hospital on a regular basis.
“No, it’s about the same. We did get a new Safeway store and a strip mall over by the bank.”
“Good. I have to do some shopping and get Colorado tags for my car.” Grace ran a hand through her hair, holding out a long strand, looking at the splint ends. “And I need a haircut.”
“Cindy's still on Main Street next to the post office. She seems to be doing well. Every time I go to get my hair done, the place is packed with customers.” Nana put Ollie on the floor and walked over to the fireplace. “She always asks about you.” Nana picked up the wrought iron poker. “Did you know she and her husband split up last year? He was running around on her with some woman in Denver.” Flustered, Nana glanced away. “Oh, I’m sorry, honey. I shouldn’t have said that.”
Grace took a deep breath. It was ironic her and Cindy’s marriages had suffered the same fate—betrayal. “It’s okay. I’m over it.” She picked lint off the flowered sofa pillow she held against her chest. "After I became ill, I couldn’t be a real wife to Lee. And he couldn’t handle it."
Shadows of past hurts marched through her mind like a funeral procession...back to years ago. At the height of her pain and suffering, she had caught him in the swimming pool with a naked woman. Worse, he hadn’t even cared—he just laughed and returned to the woman’s arms, leaving Grace broken and crushed both physically and emotionally. It was a hard lesson, but well learned. The marriage was over. The next day she let him move her into a nursing home, tossing her aside like yesterday’s stale donuts.
Nana poked the log in the fireplace with a vengeance, bringing Grace back to the present. “A real wife? That’s hogwash. The man was no good. You were going through a tough time. Instead of taking up with another woman at the first sign of trouble, he should’ve been there for you, stood by you.”
Grace watched bright orange sparks fly up the chimney as Nana pushed the log around the grate. She suppressed hurt feelings under the appearance of indifference and chose her words carefully. “My life has changed. I’ve had to accept things as they are, not as I want them to be. When someone is in great pain like I was, you don’t feel like making love. And let’s face it, that’s the backbone of any marriage.” She hesitated. This was hard to talk about. “He didn’t want to wait for me to get better.”
“Sweetheart, there’s a lot more to a relationship than sex.” Nana poked the log angrily. “I’m going to tell you something about Lee. I should’ve told you years ago.” She pushed her small round wire-rimmed glasses up on the bridge of her nose. “When you were living in Denver and engaged Papa saw Lee with another woman. He thought it was some kind of business dinner or he would’ve told you and spared you this heartache.” She frowned and hit the log again. “You don't need him. There will be someone else, someone better for you.”
Grace stopped playing with her hair. This conversation was inevitable. She might as well get it over with. “I know about his affair with the woman in Denver. It came out when we separated. Since she is an attorney, too, they have a lot in common.” She sighed deeply. “Actually, she lives in LA now and they’re together.” The witch had been the woman in her swimming pool.
Nana started toward the open kitchen. “Well, you're better off without him. And this calls for something stronger than tea. Would you like a glass of White Zinfandel?” She picked up two long-stemmed wine glasses and a chilled bottle and headed back to Grace.
“Sounds good to me.” Grace sat up and took the wine glass. “I’ve worked it out in my mind. I wish them well. I want Lee to be happy.” She tried to push down the fact it still hurt. “In his own way, he was good to me. He was fair with the divorce.”
“Of course he was fair. Humph...he had no choice. You caught him in the act.” Nana filled their glasses.
The wine was cool against Grace’s throat. She didn’
t want to talk about Lee anymore. “I want to put this behind me and get on with what’s left of my life.” She sighed. “I need you to understand that I have to protect myself. Stress of any kind causes me to physically hurt more.”
“Honey, I had no idea. I don’t want you to hurt. What can I do?”
“Nothing. It’s all up to me. I have to let the emotional baggage with Lee go. Then I can move on to better times. It’s too painful to remember.” She ran a hand through her hair. “In my own defense, I must wish him well. Now, do you understand?”
“Yes, I think I do. And you’re right, he isn’t worth hurting over.” Nana sipped the wine. “I’m proud of you for the way you’ve handled what's happened to you. But, like I said, one day a good man will come into your life. He won’t care about your condition. He’ll love you for being you.”
Grace frowned and shook her head. “I’ve given up on the idea of another man. I had a lot of time to think while I was in the rehab center. It’s just me. No one else. And that’s how it has to be.” She set the glass on the coffee table. “I wouldn’t want to burden anyone with my physical problems. I still might end up in a wheelchair. I couldn’t put that responsibility on someone else.” Grace focused blindly on the yellow-orange flames dancing high in the fireplace. A life alone. As much as she knew that was her future, she couldn’t escape the emptiness inside.
“Honey, you can’t think that way. They said you'd never walk again. Now look at you. You've come so far. You’re a success story, an inspiration to other people who have this disease. You have to stay positive.”
“It’s okay. I am positive. I’m being realistic about my life. I’m thirty-six and have to face facts. I can’t work as a make-up artist anymore. My career is over.” She sighed. “I don’t know what I’m going to do, but marriage is the last thing on my mind. I know I can’t be a normal wife—a man doesn’t want to tie himself to an invalid.” She sighed.
“Anyway, I can live my life without a man and I’ll find something else to do.” Grace had to say these things to convince herself. It wasn’t that she didn’t want someone in her life. It was that physically she wasn’t good enough to keep them happy. Plus she was considered one hundred percent disabled—that wasn’t much to offer anyone.
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