by HJ Bellus
Cree threw a fit about not being able to see me on our wedding day. He claimed it wasn’t fair since I had both kids. He was good at throwing fits, but the poor man never stood a chance at winning this battle. The girls were putting their finishing touches on each other as I stepped out into my bedroom to change Mac into his onesie that was sporting a tie and his soft baby blue jeans. He was going to be dressed just like his daddy. Cree was going to be in his signature baby blue jeans, a white buttoned up shirt, untucked, with a black tie and his trucker hat.
Mac was Cree’s best man, and his two groomsmen were Greyson and his cousin Tripp. Tripp and his parents showed up a week earlier to help with the wedding. His Aunt Phyllis was amazing. I loved having her around. His Uncle Robert was very quiet, and it was clear he was very uncomfortable being back on the family farm. They lived in Florida and owned a huge chain of car dealerships.
Tripp was going to live with us for a while. He had just been released from rehab. Tripp had found himself in a great deal of trouble with drugs and money. He was definitely a bad boy and fit the image perfectly with his tattoos and piercings. Tripp was the complete opposite of my farm boy Cree. The pair used to spend the summers together when they were small boys and were very close.
Cree and Mac would be walking down the aisle together, then Greyson and Willow, followed by Lacey and Tripp. Annie and I marched down the aisle together to “Girls Just Want to Have Fun.” This was the one thing Annie insisted on.
The ceremony was beautiful. We vowed our love and commitment to each other and to each of our kids. Cree laid a big sloppy wet kiss on me, and then picked up his Annie and twirled her around. We walked back down the aisle as Mr. & Mrs. Cree Fitzpatrick. Mac was in my arms and Annie was in Cree’s…it was my picture-perfect now and forever.
We finished the night of dancing to “Never Grow Up” by Taylor Swift, with our kids bundled in our arms and our arms wrapped around each other tightly. The last dance of the evening was just for Cree and me. I picked the song “God Bless the Broken Road,” and tugged him out onto the dance floor.
“You owe me a dance, Captain.”
Cree pulled me close and wrapped his arms around my waist. I weaved my hands under his arms and around to his back and laid my head on his chest.
The simple truth is I will never again be left alone broken in a corner. Holding onto hope is being brave. I have clutched onto hope for the last twenty years of my life and was brave enough to dream of my future. My time is now and I have healed. I have chosen to live the life my heart has yearned for. I’m enough. I’m okay. And I’m home. Life is so beautiful right now. “Let your courage set you free.” – Cindarelly
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
First of all, thanks to my real-life farm boy! We have been together for the last 19 years and have created our own amazing story together. You sport a trucker hat like no other and love your family unconditionally. You have always been my rock. I know you hate mushy shit, so I will stop now. I love you, Pinkus!
“Remember, you are always enough!”
–HJ Bellus
My friend, soul sista, and all-around badass hoochie…Edee Marie Fallon! Where do I start? Your dedicated support, texts and laughs have been priceless to me on this amazing journey. These crazy characters would still be bottled up in my little pea brain without you. Thank you for everything. Your fingerprints are all over this story…Love you now and forever!
“Let yourself dream bigger.”
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
I am an independent author, obviously! This adventure has been a dream come true. I'm all country…the kinda country where green grass grows and corn pops up in rows…love Miranda and her bad ass music. I live and love country life, and you will find those elements in my books. I’m just a simple country girl getting one story out of her head at a time. I love strong and brave female characters. I strive to be a courageous and independent woman in everyday life and want to portray those characters in my books. No victims here…only take charge ass-kickin’ kinda gals! I always fall hard for a trucker style hat…especially if it's Green & Yellow…I love me a good ol' farm boy!
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“Don’t you dare ever give up on your hopes and dreams…Be Brave and hold onto your courage now & forever.” –HJ Bellus
“Set Your Heart Free…Let Nothing Control You!”
CREE Playlist
Daughter by Pearl Jam
(Prologue)
Dead Flowers by Miranda Lambert
(Milly’s First Marriage)
Seven Nation Army by The White Stripes
(When Milly packs up Frances’ things and the “For Sale” sign)
Baggage Claim by Miranda Lambert
(Leaving town)
Because of You by Kelly Clarkson
(Milly’s Life Left Behind in Sacramento)
Loca by Shakira
(The oil change & service by Malcolm)
The Long Way Home by Norah Jones
(Driving to Colorado)
When Will I Be Loved by Karla Bonoff & Vince Gill
(Milly’s Theme Song)
Baby Got Her Blue Jeans On by Mel McDaniel
(Lacey & Milly’s Dancing Song)
Boys ‘Round Here by Blake Shelton (feat. Pistol Annies)
(Naughty Boy Sam!)
Out Last Night by Kenny Chesney
(Lacey and Milly’s first bar hopping experience)
Suit & Tie by Justin Timberlake
(The pop song Milly & Sam grind to)
Redneck Girl by The Bellamy Brothers
(Month of Honky Tonks)
The Race is On by Sawyer Brown
(Sam & Milly Dancing)
Somebody Like You by Keith Urban
(Milly and Cree dancing at the bon fire)
American Girl by Tom Petty
(Group dance at the bon fire)
Blue (Da Ba Dee) by Eiffel 65
(Group dance at the bon fire)
Tonight Is The Night by Outasight
(Group Dance at the bon fire)
When the Stars Go Blue by Tim McGraw
(Coffee with Cree and Milly)
Take Me There by Rascal Flatts
(Iced Coffee Kisses)
Like Jesus Does by Eric Church
(Driving to the cabin on Milly’s Birthday)
You Save Me by Kenny Chesney
(Milly’s Birthday)
Girls Just Want To Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper
(Girls baking cookies)
She Thinks My Tractor’s Sexy by Kenny Chesney
(Milly & Cree’s lunch dates on the tractor)
Rain is a Good Thing by Luke Bryan
(Cree and Milly on the farm)
Big Green Tractor by Kenny Chesney
(Cree & Milly on tractor)
Sunrise by Norah Jones
(Lazy Sunday Mornings with Cree & Annie)
Ready to Roll by Blake Shelton
(Cree and Milly’s cuddle song)
Look At Miss Ohio by Miranda Lambert
(Song Milly was listening to when she had her blow-out!)
Sexy and I Know It by LMFAO
(The Beating Ass Sprinkle Dance)
Ice Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice
(Karaoke with the bitches)
Love Shack by The B-52’s
(The Gang singing Karaoke)
Desperation by Miranda Lambert
(Milly broken & desperate)
Not Ready to Make Nice by Dixie Chicks
(When Cree hurts Milly)
Just Give Me A Reason by Pink
(When Cree is texting sorry to Milly)
Stuck Like Glue by Sugarland
(Milly and Annie’s relationship)
These Are My People by Rodney Atkins
(Cree, Milly, Greyson, Willow, Lacey, & Annie living life together)
Love Your Love the Most by Eric Church
(Milly’s song to Cree)
Don’t Think I Can’t Love You by Jake Owen
(When Cree comes home from work exhausted)
Never Grow Up
(Milly’s song for her children)
Bless the Broken Road by Rascal Flatts
(Dance At Wedding)
Table of Contents
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Epilogue